Be as boring as possible.

[satindesire]

I mean, YAWN....

How does your friend sleep with a tennis ball on his back. How does it stay there. Is it mind over matter, is he a magician, is it one of those magic tennis balls, does he strap it to himself? If he does, does he use elastic, or rope, or tape? If it's tape, is it masking, or electrical, or duct tape? If it's duct tape, is it the classic silver kind, or one of the new colors, like green or red or blue? Or maybe one of the really new girly colors like white or pink? If it's tape, doesn't it hurt when he removes it? Or doesn't he remove it? If he doesn't remove it does it look like he's got a tennis ball taped to himself, or does it look like something else? What else would it look like? An orange? A miniature second head? Wouldn't that be scary? I mean if people thought it was a second head. If people thought it was an orange, they'd just think it was strange, and wonder how it stayed in one place.

I'm tired now. Nite nite.

No no no no...I won't have the talk of this new-fangled "colored" duct tape in this here nice safe boring thread. Next thing you know, you're going to ask the gob'ment to let the "coloreds" hang out in the same bins as the nice, safe "not-colored" tape and there'll be sit-ins and marches and well...we just can't have that sort of talk.

Move along.

 

[midwestyankee]

No no no no...I won't have the talk of this new-fangled "colored" duct tape in this here nice safe boring thread.

Move along.

People with priapismic orange peels in their avatars should not be allowed to post in this otherwise boring thread.

 

[satindesire]

People with priapismic orange peels in their avatars should not be allowed to post in this otherwise boring thread.

I'm not just a "people". I am the boring thread police. So I make the rules here, sonny.

 

[midwestyankee]

I'm not just a "people". I am the boring thread police. So I make the rules here, sonny.

You'll have to show me your badge or, failing the possession of such, your original ass av before I'll consider respecting your authority as thread police in this neighborhood, little girl.

 

[lovecraft68]

I put a bagel in the toaster and forgot about it. Until I smelled it. Now I have to make another.

 

[mmarfox]

Time to go for a run. Sprint intervals today. Yay!

 

[DVS]

No no no no...I won't have the talk of this new-fangled "colored" duct tape in this here nice safe boring thread. Next thing you know, you're going to ask the gob'ment to let the "coloreds" hang out in the same bins as the nice, safe "not-colored" tape and there'll be sit-ins and marches and well...we just can't have that sort of talk.

Move along.

All tape has the right to exist. Even the coloreds. You need to step back and re-e-val-u-ate. Boring is key to the good life. Boring is hip. Boring is cool. And you, my friend, are a goll darn tapist!

 

[satindesire]

You'll have to show me your badge or, failing the possession of such, your original ass av before I'll consider respecting your authority as thread police in this neighborhood, little girl.

http://www.spiritualtramp.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/cartman-as-the-police-respect-my-authority11.jpg

All tape has the right to exist. Even the coloreds. You need to step back and re-e-val-u-ate. Boring is key to the good life. Boring is hip. Boring is cool. And you, my friend, are a goll darn tapist!

Oh, so you're sayin' you're just as fine and dandy with your daughter datin' some BLUE TAPE BOY?!

You want them grandkids to come out not knowing what color they supposedta be?!

You, my friend, are a bleedin' heart liberal.

 

[DVS]

http://www.spiritualtramp.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/cartman-as-the-police-respect-my-authority11.jpg



Oh, so you're sayin' you're just as fine and dandy with your daughter datin' some BLUE TAPE BOY?!

You want them grandkids to come out not knowing what color they supposedta be?!

You, my friend, are a bleedin' heart liberal.

"Blue tape boy" is your words. He's fine by me. We don't much go to family reunions, anyway.

 

[CallMeMistress]

I'm not hungry any more........

 

[Kitty_Schrödinger]

It's Tuesday.

 

[Sir_Winston54]

You'll have to show me your badge or, failing the possession of such, your original ass av before I'll consider respecting your authority as thread police in this neighborhood, little girl.

Mention of sd's original ass av in this thread is a violation of the TTOS (Thread Terms of Service). Be careful; you have been warned!

 

[midwestyankee]

Mention of sd's original ass av in this thread is a violation of the TTOS (Thread Terms of Service). Be careful; you have been warned!

What's the punishment for violation of the TOS? Do I have to transcribe old B'loved threads on onion skin paper and mail them to SD?

 

[Sir_Winston54]

What's the punishment for violation of the TOS? Do I have to transcribe old B'loved threads on onion skin paper and mail them to SD?

No, you have to *read* and *re-read* them for a specified period of time.

 

[midwestyankee]

No, you have to *read* and *re-read* them for a specified period of time.

No sweat. I can read with my eyes closed and one hand tied behind my back.

 

[Curious_in_Cali]

When there are a lot of cars on the freeway, the maximum rate of speed slows down quite a bit, they call it traffic. In general, I don't like traffic jams and I would imagine they would not be improved even if served on toast.

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

I mean, YAWN....

How does your friend sleep with a tennis ball on his back. How does it stay there. Is it mind over matter, is he a magician, is it one of those magic tennis balls, does he strap it to himself? If he does, does he use elastic, or rope, or tape? If it's tape, is it masking, or electrical, or duct tape? If it's duct tape, is it the classic silver kind, or one of the new colors, like green or red or blue? Or maybe one of the really new girly colors like white or pink? If it's tape, doesn't it hurt when he removes it? Or doesn't he remove it? If he doesn't remove it does it look like he's got a tennis ball taped to himself, or does it look like something else? What else would it look like? An orange? A miniature second head? Wouldn't that be scary? I mean if people thought it was a second head. If people thought it was an orange, they'd just think it was strange, and wonder how it stayed in one place.

I'm tired now. Nite nite.

I will ask him. I believe that he puts it inside a sock or something. I am not certain, I guess, is what I am saying. I think a misshapen orange head would be scary, yes, but it has not seemed to have hindered the career of John Boehner.

Ponderings of red placemats:

"When lying flat on your back life can feel crumby, but from that place everything has to look up."

I wiped some crumbs off my desk yesterday. I looked up, but all I saw was painted, white drywall.

People with priapismic orange peels in their avatars should not be allowed to post in this otherwise boring thread.

It made me think of the Gingerbread Man. I would relate lewd verse, changed to reflect Citrusboy instead of Gingerbread Man, but I am afraid it really would be boring, and that would make me very, very sad. And then the fact that I cared whether people liked it would make me sad, too. And that would be so boring. And sad.

 

[Babyslave]

I will ask him. I believe that he puts it inside a sock or something. I am not certain, I guess, is what I am saying. I think a misshapen orange head would be scary, yes, but it has not seemed to have hindered the career of John Boehner.

Well, that Boehner comment was just silly. Not boring.

If the tennis ball is in a sock, doesn't the sock move around? I don't know why I'm stuck on this tennis ball thing, but I can't help but wonder... I even thought about it at work today. WHY on Earth do I care about this? (which makes me realize just how truly boring my life has become. Sigh.) My life is now ruled by thoughts of this man's ball.

 

[Curious_in_Cali]

I wiped some crumbs off my desk yesterday. I looked up, but all I saw was painted, white drywall.

Pretty typical when you look up that things finally start to look all white. Well, at least I thought I red that crumb place once.

*Disclaimer ~ Yes, I realize this is NOT the pun thread, but for those that don't enjoy punning, this would be quite boring to read and for those that do enjoy punning this is not a very good one, so I feel its mediocrity earns its keep... so either way I find this post appropriately nestled in this thread. Thank you.

 

[rbijon]

I colored my rainbow brown & white.

 

[satindesire]

I colored my rainbow brown & white.

Look all ye upon this fine example of blanditude.

Y'all could do with a lesson from this one, here.

 

[midwestyankee]

Look all ye upon this fine example of blanditude.

Y'all could do with a lesson from this one, here.

Your accent is disturbing the blandness here.

 

[Curious_in_Cali]

Look all ye upon this fine example of blanditude.

Y'all could do with a lesson from this one, here.

Hmmm, oh oh, I got it!

Beige.

 

[satindesire]

Your accent is disturbing the blandness here.

Which one, the Ye Olde English, or the Southern one? Because either way, you're probably right.

Hmmm, oh oh, I got it!

Beige.

If it were permissible in this thread, that probably would have made me pop a giant boner.

 

[Curious_in_Cali]

If it were permissible in this thread, that probably would have made me pop a giant boner.

Hmmm...


Khaki.