Being autistic and random stuff

[stickygirl]

Every damned time! I have a bf now who is NT and he makes me go - then I have a nice time, although I will still consider all the ways the evening could go wrong before I get there.

 

[Strixaluco]

I've been suspecting that autism makes me more exhausted that other people would be when slightly ill. I don't have capacity free for even slight fever and what it entails. Like, sensory load and stuff.

Or maybe it's comorbidities of HSD, which is a comorbodity of autism... All too vague to really know.

Anyway, doctors don't take it into account. Kind of... No sore throat, not sneezing constantly, no other symptoms really, just slight fever - you should be able to function normally.

 

[stickygirl]

I've been suspecting that autism makes me more exhausted that other people would be when slightly ill. I don't have capacity free for even slight fever and what it entails. Like, sensory load and stuff.

Or maybe it's comorbidities of HSD, which is a comorbodity of autism... All too vague to really know.

Anyway, doctors don't take it into account. Kind of... No sore throat, not sneezing constantly, no other symptoms really, just slight fever - you should be able to function normally.

I guess we take our normally functioning bodies for granted: if it isn't working properly it's extra intrusive. Get well sooner!

 

[stickygirl]

I've been diving into the music of Tori Amos recently.

I know it’s a trait, but I’m especially crap at picking out a voice and words against background noise. That might be in the context of a noisy restaurant, which can be distracting to anyone, but what about music? I watched a couple of those videos where an expert musician listens to a song for the first time. I noticed they each heard and understood the full meaning of each line of Tori Amos' words as she sung. Tori does have super clear diction, but even so - there's too much to process at once/simultaneously.

By contrast, I have to download the lyrics, read them, read them with the music playing, memorise them then I’m back up to speed…. Oh - and then I have to untangle the often complex language and meaning… then finally I'm good.

Ha! It kinda takes the spontaneity of music huh?!

 

[Zrosey]

By contrast, I have to download the lyrics, read them, read them with the music playing, memorise them then I’m back up to speed…. Oh - and then I have to untangle the often complex language and meaning… then finally I'm good.

I stopped by over on this thread to see whats up around here...and zounds! what you say here almost mirrors me exactly!
go figure.....

 

[stickygirl]

I stopped by over on this thread to see whats up around here...and zounds! what you say here almost mirrors me exactly!
go figure.....

Some people can, some can't. It's not something I'd ever admit to, because I felt like I was the thicko in the room. Actually... I can remember one girlfriend in particular mocking me over it, or at least rolling her eyes...pffft... I don't speak to her anymore now anyway

 

[Strixaluco]

I know it’s a trait, but I’m especially crap at picking out a voice and words against background noise. That might be in the context of a noisy restaurant, which can be distracting to anyone, but what about music?

Auditory processing issues (or even disorder). Yeah, it sucks.

In fact, even just having the sound of wind or whatnot is enough. So, I need to have visual cues. To see the person talking, or at least some aiding pictures (like in a PowerPoint show).

I've even had my hearing tested - it's excellent actually. And that doesn't help, on the contrary, I only pick up so much more sounds. I know at least one of my friends has it, too.

And on that record... It has been nice to realise how many other ND people I have "collected" unknowingly in my fiends. People started getting diagnosis less than 10 years ago. I might have one neurotypical friend, possibly.

 

[stickygirl]

Good point about linking sight to sound. In learning French at school, some lessons would be with headphones, with no visual cues to lean on. I found that incredibly difficult, although it was a useful skill in being able to communicate verbally in a foreign language. However, communication isn't simply auditory ( except on a phone and we NDs struggle with those ) , communication is visual and kinetic as well: we need to see the lips move, the body language, the space and context, purpose even.

 

[Strixaluco]

Seeing this finally put some pieces together for me. Before that I didn't even know it has a name.

 

[stickygirl]

Seeing this finally put some pieces together for me. Before that I didn't even know it has a name.

Oh mate - this was like coming home!
I was chuckling all the way through this

 

[Strixaluco]

Oh mate - this was like coming home!
I was chuckling all the way through this

If you didn't know Orion Kelly from before, I suggest you go down the rabbit hole...

 

[stickygirl]

If you didn't know Orion Kelly from before, I suggest you go down the rabbit hole...

I've seen one or two of his videos but not that one. TY.
I usually end up with an Australian accent for a few hours after

 

[Strixaluco]

I've seen one or two of his videos but not that one. TY.
I usually end up with an Australian accent for a few hours after

I follow him, Chris and Debbie, and Mom on the Spectrum. They all have their own strengths.

 

[stickygirl]

I recall being irritated by 'autism expert' Prof Simon Baron Cohen in one of his numerous videos. SBC has suggested that autism expresses itself as a hyper masculine brain phenotype. I've been very sceptical of that conclusion, but having come from Reddit, maybe he has a point after all?
Jeez!! The male policing going on at Reddit is SO aggressive. For example, someone posted the question "Is it okay to self diagnose autism?" They were answered by a dogfight pile-on of vitriol "no, you can't" "That's insulting to autistics" "You must get a diagnosis" ... how dare you... we don't accept mudbloods here...

There's enough arrogance on Lit, there's no need to look for more at Reddit.

 

[FataMorgana]

I recall being irritated by 'autism expert' Prof Simon Baron Cohen in one of his numerous videos. SBC has suggested that autism expresses itself as a hyper masculine brain phenotype. I've been very sceptical of that conclusion, but having come from Reddit, maybe he has a point after all?
Jeez!! The male policing going on at Reddit is SO aggressive. For example, someone posted the question "Is it okay to self diagnose autism?" They were answered by a dogfight pile-on of vitriol "no, you can't" "That's insulting to autistics" "You must get a diagnosis" ... how dare you... we don't accept mudbloods here...

There's enough arrogance on Lit, there's no need to look for more at Reddit.

I nearly said wtf does Ali G know about autism then read it properly.

Twat.

 

[RosewoodTulip]

I recall being irritated by 'autism expert' Prof Simon Baron Cohen in one of his numerous videos. SBC has suggested that autism expresses itself as a hyper masculine brain phenotype. I've been very sceptical of that conclusion, but having come from Reddit, maybe he has a point after all?
Jeez!! The male policing going on at Reddit is SO aggressive. For example, someone posted the question "Is it okay to self diagnose autism?" They were answered by a dogfight pile-on of vitriol "no, you can't" "That's insulting to autistics" "You must get a diagnosis" ... how dare you... we don't accept mudbloods here...

There's enough arrogance on Lit, there's no need to look for more at Reddit.

There's a lot of gatekeeper attitudes in many smaller groups. Like their struggles are minimised somehow when other people have the same ones.
And I'm not diagnosed (but I've been peer reviewed plenty of times) and I struggle myself with whether to join spaces for those that are - like I'm a fraud or something - because of seeing comments like that floating around the internet.
And yes I read Sacha instead of Simon too

 

[Strixaluco]

Those wanting to join an autism Discord group that is not policing in such a way, can ask me and I'll send a link.

It's 18+, and even we middle-aged people exist and can thrive there.

 

[stickygirl]

I nearly said wtf does Ali G know about autism then read it properly.

Twat.

I was going to add that I'm also irritated by people who insist on several words in their title. It's not difficult chose either Baron or Cohen ffs.
Now I have added it

 

[stickygirl]

There's a lot of gatekeeper attitudes in many smaller groups. Like their struggles are minimised somehow when other people have the same ones.
And I'm not diagnosed (but I've been peer reviewed plenty of times) and I struggle myself with whether to join spaces for those that are - like I'm a fraud or something - because of seeing comments like that floating around the internet.
And yes I read Sacha instead of Simon too

I sense autistic men circle the wagons regarding diagnosis. I wonder if some of them feel undermined by the changing male/female ratio? They should listen to themselves more often because haven't we all heard 'You make eye-contact so you can't be autistic' or 'You make eye contact...' It's the same dismissive language and tone.

Maybe I wouldn't meet official diagnostic criterium - my counsellor said 'traits' so that's probably just the entree and not the full 4-course meal. Learning about autism has made me more considerate of other people, quite apart from helping me through a difficult period. I understand the problems of autism and I'm looking to be an 'official cardholder' , particularly if it means acting like a jerk.

 

[stickygirl]

Random post today is that when I pass people on the street I always breath out slowly. Originally it was because I found perfume so unpleasant, but have done it more since covid... more = all the time. The problem is a line of people because I'm nearly passing out by the end, so breath out slowly!

 

[stickygirl]

I've just confirmed I lip read! I was watching a YT with an Italian interviewer and in the first sequence she was included in the frame when she spoke. A bit of an accent, but I understood. Next sequence she is speaking out of frame and her voice is like Ma-di-pop-chang-ti-billifer-an-solitor-grundon...

Kinda funny! My dentist has a strong Nigerian accent and it takes me a whole appointment to get my ear-tuned... plus she wears a mask so...
I know there's a word for it... auditory processing dysfunction or something. My hearing's fine.

 

[TwinkleStars]

For stickygirl........

 

[stickygirl]

Why am I not surprised? International soccer player Lucy Bronze discovered she was autistic four years ago and has now stepped up to be an ambassador for autism in the UK. If only she played for Arsenal, not Chelsea

She features in one of my stories, Goalposts 2

 

[PMarky2]

Seeing this finally put some pieces together for me. Before that I didn't even know it has a name.

It did for me too. I have one student who is particularly difficult for me to understand as he both talks fairly quickly and has a speech impediment. I long to tell him to slow down.

I am also feeling rather alone at the moment. My wife is throwing my Asperger's in my face rather a lot, and telling me what an inconvenience it is to her. My BAF is working a lot of hours and spending the weekends with her friends rather than her family, so I am not getting to see her. The golden rule of our relationship is that I am not to be clingy or obtrusive, so I am just having to wait for her to reappear which is hard going as I miss the intellectual stimulation and the understanding that her presence brings.

 

[Strixaluco]

It did for me too. I have one student who is particularly difficult for me to understand as he both talks fairly quickly and has a speech impediment. I long to tell him to slow down

Well why don't you? Can't even tell how many times I have been told to slow down.

I am also feeling rather alone at the moment. My wife is throwing my Asperger's in my face rather a lot, and telling me what an inconvenience it is to her.

That's so not ok in a relationship. Besides, you had it already when you got together. It's like choosing a tall partner and then complaining how unpractical the height difference is!

My BAF is working a lot of hours and spending the weekends with her friends rather than her family, so I am not getting to see her. The golden rule of our relationship is that I am not to be clingy or obtrusive, so I am just having to wait for her to reappear which is hard going as I miss the intellectual stimulation and the understanding that her presence brings.

Differences in how much you want to see each other are so frustrating. Offering a virtual hug