Bi Misunderstanding

[BitterIchor]

Yes, there are many misconceptions about bisexualism and about every other sexual-related orientation, preference, deviation and fetish out there. But isn't this the 400th thread about this particular topic? Like...we get it.

 

[ezervet]

Damn straight! And if anyone is having any sort of ongoing issues with it, or want to talk about it some more, they can just jump off a bridge. I mean, the GLBT forum isn't some kind of place to find "support" or "friends" for god's sake. And the way they just FORCE you to to open the thread and then reply..what a bunch of insensitive jerks.

Oh, wait, no.

 

[rip_1_4_u]

By Bi Misunderstanding, I mean that whenever I tell anyone that I'm bisexual, some little babblefish in his/her ear translates that to:

"I'm indescriminately promiscuous and want to do you now!"

Why is that?

Anyone else get that?

(I'm only promiscuous online. Is that so wrong?)

Well I married my best friend (a guy) after the girl I wanted met someone at michigan..lol...I told my husband way before we got married I liked women...so after we got divorced I got involved with a woman and was with her 15 years...I assumed that meant I was a lesbian...so...now I'm dating men and it is kinda awful coming out as bisexual...I've heard the weirdest shit! How many times will I get invited to a threesome? why do married men assume I want to fuck them because I'm bi?

The stupidest stuff I heard from guys when I said (and believed) I was a lesbian was: "what do you do (in bed)" to which I replied on bad days:
"your poor wife/girlfriend, she needs a good fuck";
on good days, I'd just say "Buy a book or google it"

Now since I've figured out I'm bi I've suddenly become:
a slut: I guess since I can be attracted to anything that moves I fuck at all times; granted sometimes I feel like fucking at all times, but that doesn't mean I do it! I do need my beauty rest...
who does threesomes with anyone: I now ask the guys if they want a threesome with a guy-guy-girl combo which causes quite a stir
who also loves anal sex: shit, maybe I should try it?
who loves to watch porn: I don't, but again, being a new slut in town I guess I should give it a whirl
and of course I know everything about oral sex: since that's all lesbians do?

Oy!

 

[chun_gong]

Off Topic!!!

chun_gong: you have just become a member of the lit cool gang

Since I am really enjoying your posts, because of your awesome comments, and I have read your forum replies (at least here in GLBT), and I think you are great

Awww Wolfman1982, thank you. But, I didn't know that there was a "cool gang". lol Also wasn't trying to get my membership card!

Thank you for reading my GLBT posts. I'm flattered. *blushing* I am who I am and try to be true to it... shitty or not. Oh, and you're not to shabby yourself.

 

[BitterIchor]

Damn straight! And if anyone is having any sort of ongoing issues with it, or want to talk about it some more, they can just jump off a bridge. I mean, the GLBT forum isn't some kind of place to find "support" or "friends" for god's sake. And the way they just FORCE you to to open the thread and then reply..what a bunch of insensitive jerks.

I totally see what you're saying! One could almost think this was a public message board where different people could express their opinions on various matters even if they're not what everyone wants to hear. Someone should really post a really sarcastic message to get some of those damn deviants in line. But oh, I see you already did that. Good job! Now get to work on posting topics about things that everyone has already expressed their opinions on at least three times each!

 

[SEVERUSMAX]

Funny that happens when I tell people I am not monogamous too! I am never promiscuous.

There is also an assumption that if you are bi, you always need to be having sex with both sexes.

Tell me about it. There is a happy medium in between only fucking one sex or one person and fucking everyone who wants it with you. Just because he or she might want me doesn't mean that I want him or her. And if I don't want to fuck someone, I don't feel obligated to do so.

 

[CuriousNiceGuy]

I totally see what you're saying! One could almost think this was a public message board where different people could express their opinions on various matters even if they're not what everyone wants to hear. Someone should really post a really sarcastic message to get some of those damn deviants in line. But oh, I see you already did that. Good job! Now get to work on posting topics about things that everyone has already expressed their opinions on at least three times each!

lol sarcasm rulez XD
Well I guess you have your point.Seeing another new thread on "I like cock.This doesn't make me gay does it?" isn't some new issue to talk about.
We've seen thousands of this kinds of threads. But guess what! You aren't obligated to reply to it! :O
If you don't want to reply, just ignore it!

 

[BitterIchor]

lol sarcasm rulez XD
Well I guess you have your point.Seeing another new thread on "I like cock.This doesn't make me gay does it?" isn't some new issue to talk about.
We've seen thousands of this kinds of threads. But guess what! You aren't obligated to reply to it! :O
If you don't want to reply, just ignore it!

But I DID want to reply. As you can see, I had something to say on the matter.

 

[CuriousNiceGuy]

But I DID want to reply. As you can see, I had something to say on the matter.

Oh...
Isn't the woman in your avatar THE hotness? *tries to get out of embarassing situation by changing subject*

Btw, I was just talking in general. You know, for those people who spoil the fun of having 400 identical threads

 

[cordite]

By Bi Misunderstanding, I mean that whenever I tell anyone that I'm bisexual, some little babblefish in his/her ear translates that to:

"I'm indescriminately promiscuous and want to do you now!"

Why is that?

A similar thing happens when gay men come out to some straight men. Quite often the straight guy thinks "Oh no, he's indiscrimniately promiscuous and wants to do me now!".

It's a lack of understanding basically. People don't think that sexual orientation and promiscuity are two distinctly separate things.

 

[ImmortaleAmante]

I have certainly heard all of the ideas. From being bi makes you a slut who will sleep with anyone, to the you are a lesbian, or straight, to the whole phase idea. Even the whole you are being greedy and don't know what you really want idea has been one i have heard alot.

As with everything all you can do is try and educate and those who still won't listen, ignore and enjoy yourself anyway.

 

[Xelebes]

I'm a wannabe.

 

[Chuck Darwin]

This is a good thread - I have been struggling with my bi-sexuality and I think this thread has helped me a bit so thanks to cherries for starting this.

 

[LaFemmeNicole]

Bi?

If it wasn't for my husband I would be totally lesbian!

 

[chun_gong]

If it wasn't for my husband I would be totally lesbian!

mmmm Ditto! (well, if it weren't for Master...)

 

[Noor]

Okay, I am outing myself here
I don't really believe in labels, and lifestyles, I believe in love, friendship, sex and people.

To me sex is a form of intimate communication and sharing that I do within friendship. It is something that is decided by me and my partner, not by an external societal normal. I don't live a gay, straight or bi lifestyle. I live my own lifestyle. I am a non conformistist, I do what I feel, I do not limit my friendships by gender. I am selective in my sexual partners but by my own criteria.

 

[slowgo]

my two cents

I agree with Noor. Because of the many different responses you get when you tell someone you're bi (and you can't even anticipate the wild things that people will think or say), I've realized that it's not a label I can or will embrace. I am attracted to people--not every person, but some people regardless of gender. I don't need to live any particular lifestyle (although what exactly that means, I'm not sure), but I am me. I'm upfront in my relationships with both genders and that's that.

 

[cherries_on_snow]

I totally see what you're saying! One could almost think this was a public message board where different people could express their opinions on various matters even if they're not what everyone wants to hear. Someone should really post a really sarcastic message to get some of those damn deviants in line. But oh, I see you already did that. Good job! Now get to work on posting topics about things that everyone has already expressed their opinions on at least three times each!

It is possible that every word has been spoken far too many times. Silence everyone!

But, then, I wasn't here to hear them. so nevermind. Please continue.

The poll was what I was most interested in but I've had the opportunity to read some really awesome open responses too. If others have had the same experience before and have posted on it, that's great. I'd appreciate any links to similar threads.

Thanks for the warm welcome to the GLBT Chatter board folks.

Cheers.

 

[cherries_on_snow]

The stupidest stuff I heard from guys when I said (and believed) I was a lesbian was: "what do you do (in bed)" to which I replied on bad days:
"your poor wife/girlfriend, she needs a good fuck";
on good days, I'd just say "Buy a book or google it"

Now since I've figured out I'm bi I've suddenly become:
a slut: I guess since I can be attracted to anything that moves I fuck at all times; granted sometimes I feel like fucking at all times, but that doesn't mean I do it! I do need my beauty rest...
who does threesomes with anyone: I now ask the guys if they want a threesome with a guy-guy-girl combo which causes quite a stir
who also loves anal sex: shit, maybe I should try it?
who loves to watch porn: I don't, but again, being a new slut in town I guess I should give it a whirl
and of course I know everything about oral sex: since that's all lesbians do?

Oy!

Very funny. Thanks rip. =D

 

[Kitminx]

Contrary to what Literotica thinks my virgin days are well past..Im just new to you
As for the whole "If youre bi youve got to be A..B..C" thing, yeah Ive run across it too and depending on the level of willfull ignorance of the speaker I either get sort of snarky and come back with the Yes-but-not-with-you response, or consider it my responsibility to give them the Evelyn wood generic version of the bi perspective.
Fortunately being both pagan and poly and prefering the company of same, the only time I really run into it is at work where most of what I say is strictly edited to avoid scaring the muns anyway..lol.
As a recent exile to Middle America I do admit that picking up on interest signals from women here is much more difficult.

 

[cherries_on_snow]

As a recent exile to Middle America I do admit that picking up on interest signals from women here is much more difficult.

Yeah, midwesterners are, let's say subtle and not stingy. Subtle about their emotions. It is where I'm from. I left as soon as I could.

 

[HotBloodFairy]

I tell her that I'm bi and no worries, that I feel more at home among people of all sexual orientations (and gender orientations, for that matter). Less than one minute elapses before she puts her arms around me and says "let's try a little sex."

Wow, this never happens to me. I don't tell many people though. Those I do tell are ones that i've heard are also bi and are friends of mine. But i've never had that kind of a reaction. I usually get some teases, but nothing ever pans out. I do understand why you didn't take her up on her offer though.

 

[splish splash]

I am bi also

I think if something ever happend to my husband I would find a woman to live with and have told him that. I can always find a man for my needs in that department. It is really hard to find another woman that is bi, although I am still looking.
puddles

 

[do_not_shiver]

I also hate how some people translate "I'm bi" into "I'm gay but don't want to admit it."

Mind you, that is the fate of alot of gay people. Including me. I told people, and convinced myself I still had a shot at the "house, wife, kids", but I have since come to terms with myself(for now).
Giving up that little shred of "hope" of a "normal" life is VERY tough, and maybe the reason why it is somewhat commong among gay people.
Sadly, this has projected onto people that really are BI.

To me sex is a form of intimate communication and sharing that I do within friendship. It is something that is decided by me and my partner, not by an external societal normal. I don't live a gay, straight or bi lifestyle. I live my own lifestyle. I am a non conformistist, I do what I feel, I do not limit my friendships by gender. I am selective in my sexual partners but by my own criteria.

God, I wish I could live by that, but alas, I'm bound by the standards set by my society(even if they sometimes overwhelm my love for myself, and make me hate and not accept me for who I am).