Claymore and Dagger (closed)

[heartofcourage]

"What can I do to help you?" Kate asked softly, knowing that it was a sensitive subject with him. His depression always had been.

"You know that Kell and I will do whatever we can to help you through this. Anything you ask for, I will make happen." Kate waited for him to name his price. "Even if it's something for Fiona."

 

[KieranSoares]

"I don't know," he muttered helplessly. "Vincenzo stopped in, said 'e'll try t'help even things out... Da said Selena an' Durban would probably be th'most help..."

 

[heartofcourage]

"Sam, what gives you hope?" Kate asked softly, knowing that he was in a very lonely place. "Even in the darkness, something has to give you hope."

 

[KieranSoares]

"I don' know about hope... I've always jus' worked fer our family an' our people with th'idea tha' maybe I'd figure it out eventually."

 

[heartofcourage]

"You know how terrible that sounds, Sam?" Kate asked as he admitted that he didn't do anything for himself. "What about Fiona? Doesn't she deserve even a passing mention?"

 

[KieranSoares]

"I figured she was a given when I said 'family,'" he muttered, closing his eyes as another wave of guilt came over him. "She won' be much longer, though. Neither of us wants 'er t'face what Gran did."

 

[heartofcourage]

"How do you know that?" Kate asked, sitting back in her chair as her brother nearly gave up on everything. "Sam, she's stuck with you so far. You have to think about how this is all effecting her as well. She has tried so hard to make you happy, sometimes at her own expense. You might not realize it but sometimes you don't treat her as well as you should. Have you done something nice just for her lately? Or have you been your usual bossy self?"

 

[KieranSoares]

"I know it because she said so... She doesn' want us t'be like her parents." Sam buried his face in his arms, his voice muffled, "She's too good fer me, I know tha' much. If I could give back half what she's given, we wouldn' be havin' a problem."

 

[heartofcourage]

"Then maybe you should try. Start small." Kate said softly as he seemed to give up on everything, including the love of his life. "Romance her Sam. Show her what she means to you. Even when Kell feels like things are going terribly in our lives, he still surprises me with an evening that it just for the two of us."

 

[KieranSoares]

Sam didn't answer immediately, but he was listening. Eventually he murmured, "... Y'really think somethin' tha' small could help...?"

 

[heartofcourage]

"I have a cub now, don't I?" Kate said with a grin. "That all started with something small. Not even buying something, although small gifts are always nice. Loving her is probably the best thing that you can do."

"Sam, if I know you, you've given her the cold shoulder, telling her that you'll work on things later. Or you've shut her out entirely, diving into work while she patiently waits. I'm surprised she hasn't left you sooner." Kate reached out and gently touched his shoulder. "All of the work in the world isn't worth the few moments of joy that someone you love can give you. When you die, all of your good deeds will fade in time, but a family will last forever."

 

[KieranSoares]

Sam slowly lifted his head, gazing out the window for a long moment. "... I don' know how t'fix what's wrong with me... But I know I can' rely on other people t'make my life better. I 'ave t'be whole on my own, or I'll always wear on Fiona til she can' take it anymore."

 

[heartofcourage]

"I think that's the most sensible thing you've said in ages." Kate said softly, resting her head against her younger brother's.

 

[KieranSoares]

Sam slowly melted into Kate's side, his face buried against her shoulder as his whole body seemed to slump. But there was a little hope.

That evening, Sam finally dressed properly in his court uniform with the epaulets and cloak. It was shortly before dinner that his family saw him emerge, pulling on his gloves and fur cloak, headed for the door at a pace that said he had somewhere to be.

"Sam," Brogan called, making his son stop short. "Where y'goin', lad?"

"If I'm not back in an hour, a date," Sam muttered, earning a smile from his father.

"Treat 'er well, son."

 

[heartofcourage]

Fiona had stayed close to her father for the rest of that day, sitting down to mend some of his clothing without anything else to really do. She tried her hardest not to think about Sam, but that was hard. He was on her mind often and it seemed that nothing she did would make her thoughts turn away from him.

 

[KieranSoares]

There was a knock on the door as Owen was considering what to make for dinner, and he went to answer while Fiona was preoccupied. Right away, Fiona heard Sam's voice, calm and low as he asked Owen if Fiona was there. Owen didn't let him in right away, instead coming to Fiona.

"He's here, little kit, if you want to see him."

 

[heartofcourage]

Fiona looked up from her mending, a confused look on her face. She didn't expect Sam to come to her father's house, but she quietly said that she would see him. She placed his shirt aside and stood, going to the door as her father let them be.

"Sam?" Fiona asked softly surprised to see him in his full uniform. "Has something happened?"

 

[KieranSoares]

"My sister's quite th'multitasker... Queen, wife, mother, an' her dumb little brother's motivator." Sam sighed, facing Fiona with clear worry where there was normally a mask of cold and calculating focus. "There's nothin' worse I could do fer myself righ' now than drive you away, selfish as it sounds. I... I decided I'm gonna be more selfish. Take better care o' myself. Learn t'say no t'some things an' yes t'the people I love. And... The first thing I'd like t'do fer myself is make sure there'll still be an 'us' tomorrow."

 

[heartofcourage]

"Of course there will be an us tomorrow." Fiona said softly as he asked her what had been weighing on his mind. "I do love you. I will always love you. I simply want to see you get better, Sam. If that means I need to take a step back, I will."

 

[KieranSoares]

"I want us to go forward together," Sam murmured. "An' I know ye've already been more patient than anyone ever should be... But I'm askin' fer a little more patience while I figure this out. I'm gonna have bad days, I know that... But I don' want t'shy away this time. You always ask me if I'm happy... I want t'be able t'say yes someday."

 

[heartofcourage]

"I want you to say yes too." Fiona said softly as Sam admitted that he couldn't say that he was and be truthful in that moment. "I want my Sam back and I want him to be happy above everything."

 

[KieranSoares]

"And I'm going t'do everything I can t'make tha' happen." Sam bowed his head at that. "And... I'd like t'start now, if ye'd like t'come out with me. I thought we'd go out t'our tree with dinner."

 

[heartofcourage]

"You cooked me dinner?" Fiona asked, glancing back towards the house before she turned back towards him. "You didn't have to get all dressed up for this, Sam. I would have gone with you even if you were in rags."

 

[KieranSoares]

"I had some help," Sam admitted. He couldn't cook much outside a bonfire. "And... I've been moping around in bed clothes all day. I wanted t'look a little more serious."

 

[heartofcourage]

"Well, if you don't mind me looking like a slob, I suppose I can go with you." Fiona said softly, moving forward to wrap her arms around him as tightly as she could.