Corrupt Wish

[Guest]

Granted, but you can't handle the pressures of your newfound talent and the fame that goes with it, and you end up spending all your publishing royalties on cheap liquor until you end up penniless.

I wish my dogs would stop digging holes in the backyard.

granted, your dogs stop digging holes in the backyard and now because they have no outlet for their 'digging needs' they destroy the living room floor with urine to show you their displeasure.


i wish that mounds were milk chocolate.

 

[TheEarl]

Granted, now the dig holes in your carpet, front yard, neighbour's yard (who, incidentally sues you when he trips on one and breaks an ankle), and you find half chewed bones in your bed and on your favourite chair because the poor dog has no where else to hide them.

I wish Santa brings me my dream guy

Granted: Santa brings you your dream guy, but just as he brings you to the absolute edge of ecstasy...

... your alarm clock goes off and he disappears.

I wish that England hadn't lost the rugby yesterday.

The Earl

 

[carsonshepherd]

granted, your dogs stop digging holes in the backyard and now because they have no outlet for their 'digging needs' they destroy the living room floor with urine to show you their displeasure.

That's not a corrupt wish. That actually happens.

 

[Guest]

That's not a corrupt wish. That actually happens.

erm
ah
hrm

im sorry... ??

[please return to regularly scheduled corrupt wish making]

 

[carsonshepherd]

erm
ah
hrm

im sorry... ??

[please return to regularly scheduled corrupt wish making]

 

[doormouse]

I wish that England hadn't lost the rugby yesterday.

The Earl

Granted, instead they play Australia in the all day cricket and get their butts kicked

Carson Sheppard: That's not a corrupt wish, that actually happens

LOL!!!!

I wish EL's site would hurry and get back on up

 

[TheEarl]

Granted, instead they play Australia in the all day cricket and get their butts kicked

See, now you're just being ridiculous.

Granted, but she's instituted a password and validation system which means it takes you 48 hours to log on.

The Earl

 

[doormouse]

See, now you're just being ridiculous.

Granted, but she's instituted a password and validation system which means it takes you 48 hours to log on.

The Earl

psst.... you forgot to make a wish

Aussie aussie aussie!!! lol

 

[RebeccaLeah]

I wish this thread would come back from the dead.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

I wish this thread would come back from the dead.

Granted but it smells like old cheese and lingers for weeks.

I wish for...nothing really, I never get it anyway.

 

[RebeccaLeah]

Granted but it smells like old cheese and lingers for weeks.

I wish for...nothing really, I never get it anyway.

Granted, but I just changed my name to nothing.

I wish I had Abs's mad insult skillz.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Granted, but I just changed my name to nothing.

I wish I had Abs's mad insult skillz.

Granted but you find it has too much power and you are shot at daily by lesser mortals. It's a gift.

I wish that nothing nice would come my way.

 

[RebeccaLeah]

Granted but you find it has too much power and you are shot at daily by lesser mortals. It's a gift.

I wish that nothing nice would come my way.

Granted. Nasty work better for you?

I wish I could fly like Tinkerbell.

 

[NoJo]

Granted. But you have to pay your chiropractor's bills yourself.

My favorite author, Robert Sheckley, wrote a story for Playboy in the early seventies (I was fourteen....) called "Same To You Doubled" about a representative of the devil granting three wishes to a guy, with the caveat that whatever he wished for, his worst enemy would get double.


I wish I could see everyone from behind their computer screens, on my screen.

 

[carsonshepherd]

I wish I could see everyone from behind their computer screens, on my screen.

Granted, but what you see is so shocking, you are rendered blind and impotent forever. Sometimes ignorance is bliss! (in which case I should stay ecstatically happy.)

I wish I was impervious to hangovers.

 

[RebeccaLeah]

Granted, but what you see is so shocking, you are rendered blind and impotent forever. Sometimes ignorance is bliss! (in which case I should stay ecstatically happy.)

I wish I was impervious to hangovers.

Granted but you are now impervious to every effect of alcohol, including getting drunk in the first place.

I wish I didn't have to pay rent for my apartment.

 

[NoJo]

Granted but you are now impervious to every effect of alcohol, including getting drunk in the first place.

I wish I didn't have to pay rent for my apartment.

Granted, but you'd have to sleep with the landlord once a month, and three times in advance.

I wish there were no one bombs on my stories.

 

[Dar~]

I wish that it was widely socially accepted to be who you are.

 

[BlackShanglan]

Granted, but you'd have to sleep with the landlord once a month, and three times in advance.

I wish there were no one bombs on my stories.

Granted, but it's because no one votes them at all. (More the fools them, as you are clearly brilliant. Your troll must be almighty intimidated.)

I wish that it was widely socially accepted to be who you are.

Granted, but you find out that what most people really are is staggeringly unattractive in manifold and wondrous ways.

I wish that my beautiful, charming, and ever-smiling puppy could live a life of absolute happiness and joy. Perhaps she will.

Shanglan

 

[CharleyH]

Granted, but it's because no one votes them at all. (More the fools them, as you are clearly brilliant. Your troll must be almighty intimidated.)



Granted, but you find out that what most people really are is staggeringly unattractive in manifold and wondrous ways.

I wish that my beautiful, charming, and ever-smiling puppy could live a life of absolute happiness and joy. Perhaps she will.

Shanglan

She will have more life than you could ever imagine. Granted.

I have lived all of mine, so wish someone elses wishes are granted.

 

[Dar~]

I wish that charley knew how incredibly sexy I think she is . . .oops did I say that out loud?

 

[CharleyH]

Lived.

 

[cloudy]

I wish that charley knew how incredibly sexy I think she is . . .oops did I say that out loud?

Granted. But now she's forever out of reach for us mortals.

I wish this headache would go away.

 

[BlackShanglan]

Granted. But now she's forever out of reach for us mortals.

I wish this headache would go away.

Granted. Unfortunately, so does your head.

I wish I had 8 hours of free time per day.

 

[carsonshepherd]

Granted. Unfortunately, so does your head.

I wish I had 8 hours of free time per day.

Granted, but you're asleep

I wish my house was self-dusting.