Indie
Literotica Guru
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- Jan 1, 2023
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- 13,668
Dear Chemgirl (Abby)
- Thread starter crazychemgirl
- Start date
LIDiver
Thalassophile.
- Joined
- Jul 13, 2022
- Posts
- 4,526
*Diver waves bye-bye to SalMonk as he passes Diver sitting in the penalty box.*
crazychemgirl
spoon girl always
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- Jul 9, 2012
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CHEMGIRL is in session … but ALL requests must be sent via PM with the following:
Request for good or bad advice
AND
a pseudonym
Request for good or bad advice
AND
a pseudonym
crazychemgirl
spoon girl always
- Joined
- Jul 9, 2012
- Posts
- 43,590
Dear ChemGirl,
How long does someone have to serve a ChemGirl instated penalty for behavior unbecoming to the thread.
-Not Diver from not in the penalty box
Dear Not Diver from not in the penalty box,
Oh you poor soul … you are completely unaware of the ways in which you have incurred wrath. You would probably be safer tangling with dragons than risk angering the mighty chemgirl. Alas, what is done is done.
Now, for penance.
Since ChemGirl is a cruel and intolerant ruler … there is no time limit for which penalties will be paid. Just ongoing and ruthless groveling will be your one and only salvation. I recommend posting many, MANY photos of penises in every thread you encounter ChemGirl …
and not linked penises.. she wants full cock in the face every time she opens a thread. Even better if it’s un-groomed cock with its full 70s pubefro … and extra veiny to boot.
I also recommend posting against the rules in every thread she hosts… you can be assured to win her favour by continually going against the grain every time she sees your username.
If that is not enough, I suggest as a final act of penance that you call her all the best and most wonderful sexy names you can imagine… suggestions include:
- volatile vulva
- limpy labia
- titanic twat
Good luck and may the odds be ever in your favour
How long does someone have to serve a ChemGirl instated penalty for behavior unbecoming to the thread.
-Not Diver from not in the penalty box
Dear Not Diver from not in the penalty box,
Oh you poor soul … you are completely unaware of the ways in which you have incurred wrath. You would probably be safer tangling with dragons than risk angering the mighty chemgirl. Alas, what is done is done.
Now, for penance.
Since ChemGirl is a cruel and intolerant ruler … there is no time limit for which penalties will be paid. Just ongoing and ruthless groveling will be your one and only salvation. I recommend posting many, MANY photos of penises in every thread you encounter ChemGirl …
and not linked penises.. she wants full cock in the face every time she opens a thread. Even better if it’s un-groomed cock with its full 70s pubefro … and extra veiny to boot.
I also recommend posting against the rules in every thread she hosts… you can be assured to win her favour by continually going against the grain every time she sees your username.
If that is not enough, I suggest as a final act of penance that you call her all the best and most wonderful sexy names you can imagine… suggestions include:
- volatile vulva
- limpy labia
- titanic twat
Good luck and may the odds be ever in your favour
Last edited:
LIDiver
Thalassophile.
- Joined
- Jul 13, 2022
- Posts
- 4,526
Whew, good thing that’s not me.
Mr_bogey
Morally Casual
- Joined
- Nov 24, 2015
- Posts
- 18,367
Are we related?
Lord Pmann
Lord
- Joined
- Mar 12, 2012
- Posts
- 20,697
Bogey comes from a long line of trolls.
crazychemgirl
spoon girl always
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- Jul 9, 2012
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- 43,590
This thread needs more PM advice requests and less trolls.
BrendaBear
Feral Brat
- Joined
- Sep 16, 2021
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Wait, what?? THERE IS NO CRYING IN TROLLING!!!
Not that I am encouraging trolling, not at all. But since you didn’t read the troll manual… no crying. Just sayin’
crazychemgirl
spoon girl always
- Joined
- Jul 9, 2012
- Posts
- 43,590
Dear ChemGirl,
Please help me.
My sexy 25 year old neighbour was sunbathing naked the other day. I took this chance to peek out of my bathroom window and have a cheeky wank. As I finished I turned around and saw my wife standing there arms folded watching me.
I'm worried my wife is a pervert.
Signed
-Window Wanker.
Dear Window Wanker,
Well you’ve found yourself in quite the predicament I see. It’s good you’re taking the time to ask for advice.
First things first … it’s best not to approach your wife with your pervert suspicions… you’ll only force her into hiding.
You could set up a series of tests for her to determine whether it was a one time act of perviness or if she is a full time perv-member. Maybe you could approach all your neighbors and encourage them to leave their windows open when they fuck. Or if thats too much, maybe just tell them to walk around the house naked. Taking out the trash naked is another good suggestion.
Also, are you ok with who she is? You have to ask yourself… are you willing to live with that kind of reckless, wanton behaviour?
Do you want her to join your instead next time? You could wank together. I’m 100% sure your neighbor will be excited to see the married couple next door wanking to her nude body.
I hope you guys can work through this together and be pervy people together!
Please help me.
My sexy 25 year old neighbour was sunbathing naked the other day. I took this chance to peek out of my bathroom window and have a cheeky wank. As I finished I turned around and saw my wife standing there arms folded watching me.
I'm worried my wife is a pervert.
Signed
-Window Wanker.
Dear Window Wanker,
Well you’ve found yourself in quite the predicament I see. It’s good you’re taking the time to ask for advice.
First things first … it’s best not to approach your wife with your pervert suspicions… you’ll only force her into hiding.
You could set up a series of tests for her to determine whether it was a one time act of perviness or if she is a full time perv-member. Maybe you could approach all your neighbors and encourage them to leave their windows open when they fuck. Or if thats too much, maybe just tell them to walk around the house naked. Taking out the trash naked is another good suggestion.
Also, are you ok with who she is? You have to ask yourself… are you willing to live with that kind of reckless, wanton behaviour?
Do you want her to join your instead next time? You could wank together. I’m 100% sure your neighbor will be excited to see the married couple next door wanking to her nude body.
I hope you guys can work through this together and be pervy people together!
crazychemgirl
spoon girl always
- Joined
- Jul 9, 2012
- Posts
- 43,590
Dear ChemGirl,
How do you ask for advice from somebody who provides advice to some people when you don’t know what to ask for advice in from that somebody?
Signed
-I got nothing in Cluelessville
Dear I got nothing in Cluelessville,
It sounds like you may be suffering from paranoid delusions of grandeur. You somehow think you are more important and interesting than you actually are. It pains me to say it but you may need professional help. More help than I can give you. This help can be hard to find though, so I suggest you do some things so as to get noticed and the ones who can help you will seek you out.
First:
Live your life completely naked but with an aluminum foil hat. Just the hat. Wear it whenever you leave the house. Keep your blinds and curtains open at all times.
Second:
Be sure to masturbate at least 15 times a day leaving spunk trails all over your house. It’s like a homing beacon for help.
Third:
Eat only cheese. Don’t eat anything else but cheese all day, every day, for every meal. This will alert the helpers that you are ready for their assistance.
I hope the help you need finds you … and good luck.
How do you ask for advice from somebody who provides advice to some people when you don’t know what to ask for advice in from that somebody?
Signed
-I got nothing in Cluelessville
Dear I got nothing in Cluelessville,
It sounds like you may be suffering from paranoid delusions of grandeur. You somehow think you are more important and interesting than you actually are. It pains me to say it but you may need professional help. More help than I can give you. This help can be hard to find though, so I suggest you do some things so as to get noticed and the ones who can help you will seek you out.
First:
Live your life completely naked but with an aluminum foil hat. Just the hat. Wear it whenever you leave the house. Keep your blinds and curtains open at all times.
Second:
Be sure to masturbate at least 15 times a day leaving spunk trails all over your house. It’s like a homing beacon for help.
Third:
Eat only cheese. Don’t eat anything else but cheese all day, every day, for every meal. This will alert the helpers that you are ready for their assistance.
I hope the help you need finds you … and good luck.
BrendaBear
Feral Brat
- Joined
- Sep 16, 2021
- Posts
- 39,430
And the ChemGirl awesomeness flows forth… 
JerseyJade
Jade
- Joined
- Jan 18, 2018
- Posts
- 38,176
crazychemgirl
spoon girl always
- Joined
- Jul 9, 2012
- Posts
- 43,590
Dear ChemGirl,
I think we have all met people in the professional context who just don’t seem to be part of the team. Maybe they don’t look like they fit in, or they seem to struggle with getting whatever the “happening thing” is, or maybe the team is trying to achieve goal “A”, but this person seems to be striving (and struggling) to just find the bathroom. As an employer, sometimes you have to let them go, they aren’t effective employees. But what do you do, when you realize the one that just isn’t right, is you?
Signed
- Lost Cause in Loserville
Dear Lost Cause in Loserville,
Well it seems you might be coming to some startling self realizations… but that’s quite ok .., it’s good and healthy to reflect on things now and again. Some might say, with your discovery you should perhaps quit your job and find something better suited .., or perhaps strive harder to fit in to the workplace.
Those people are morons… don’t listen to them. That job is your right!! You have just as much of a right to be a mediocre employee as anyone else!
And isn’t mediocre is really what we should ALL be striving for anyway?!! I mean, do any of our jobs pay us well enough to be exemplary workers?
So you don’t get it?? … I SAY… roll with it. I bet your supervisor gets paid double what you get made … so why not put the onus on them … make them explain EVERYTHING to you two, three .. ten times!!
The team is all working together on a combined objective .., well clearly they got it.. so why should you have to do anything? … I think your time would be better spent watching tiktoks at your desk.. or maybe porn? .. I heard of a great porn site that has a message board … it’s great for a time killer. Or so they say.
Speaking of tiktoks … who needs to know the “happening thing” when you can know the latest tiktok dances. Practice them in the conference room… the latest food or prank challenge? Try it on your supervisor… I guarantee he’ll LOVE trying Oreos topped with squirty cheese!!
I assure you soon YOU will be the happening thing at your office!
Remember, you don’t have to be the best employee.. or the worst… strive for mediocre… it’s where the fun people are!
I think we have all met people in the professional context who just don’t seem to be part of the team. Maybe they don’t look like they fit in, or they seem to struggle with getting whatever the “happening thing” is, or maybe the team is trying to achieve goal “A”, but this person seems to be striving (and struggling) to just find the bathroom. As an employer, sometimes you have to let them go, they aren’t effective employees. But what do you do, when you realize the one that just isn’t right, is you?
Signed
- Lost Cause in Loserville
Dear Lost Cause in Loserville,
Well it seems you might be coming to some startling self realizations… but that’s quite ok .., it’s good and healthy to reflect on things now and again. Some might say, with your discovery you should perhaps quit your job and find something better suited .., or perhaps strive harder to fit in to the workplace.
Those people are morons… don’t listen to them. That job is your right!! You have just as much of a right to be a mediocre employee as anyone else!
And isn’t mediocre is really what we should ALL be striving for anyway?!! I mean, do any of our jobs pay us well enough to be exemplary workers?
So you don’t get it?? … I SAY… roll with it. I bet your supervisor gets paid double what you get made … so why not put the onus on them … make them explain EVERYTHING to you two, three .. ten times!!
The team is all working together on a combined objective .., well clearly they got it.. so why should you have to do anything? … I think your time would be better spent watching tiktoks at your desk.. or maybe porn? .. I heard of a great porn site that has a message board … it’s great for a time killer. Or so they say.
Speaking of tiktoks … who needs to know the “happening thing” when you can know the latest tiktok dances. Practice them in the conference room… the latest food or prank challenge? Try it on your supervisor… I guarantee he’ll LOVE trying Oreos topped with squirty cheese!!
I assure you soon YOU will be the happening thing at your office!
Remember, you don’t have to be the best employee.. or the worst… strive for mediocre… it’s where the fun people are!
LupineOne
Wolfie
- Joined
- Sep 2, 2017
- Posts
- 16,914
You have no idea how much I want to follow this advice…damn my work ethic to all nine hells!
crazychemgirl
spoon girl always
- Joined
- Jul 9, 2012
- Posts
- 43,590
Dear ChemGirl,
I work as part of a new team, where most of the team members are all very experienced with lots of big successes amongst us. We all know how to do our individual parts, and several are experts at several of the jobs required. The problem is, nobody else seems to be doing anything! How can I get these people to step it up and give what I need to do my part? I don’t know what these old coots are doing, but it isn’t getting us a finished product. So how do I get them to step up without alienating them?
Signed,
Too Fast in Texas
Dear Too Fast in Texas,
Oh man, I’ve been there … it’s so incredibly frustrating when you are doing your part and being super successful and fast … and others are just, not. I think a lot of times, I’ve found people to be very intimidated by others who out perform them, and also some jealousy. You have to tread lightly moving forward, cuz it’s a tricky road.
Firstly … positive encouragement goes a LONG way … even when someone does something that isn’t even that big of a deal… start small, don’t go overboard … cuz it will come off insincere. Small bits of praise … a little bit every day … you’d be surprised (or maybe not) how big ego plays into work performance. So that’s one thing you can try.
Another thing I’ve tried… when I’ve noticed that someone is struggling … to encourage conversation… but in a way that doesn’t make it seem like you know they are struggling … more like,
“Hey George.., how’s that [insert job task here] going? … I know when I worked on it that one time I kept screwing up on [insert some common frustration about that job task].. and it made me so annoyed. I ended up doing it this way instead and it’s so much better [describe way to do job task]”
I had this similar thing with my current coworker.., I noticed she was struggling getting a certain task done as fast as me, so I shared how I got annoyed doing it such and such way and I started doing it this way and it’s so much faster and easier.
Sharing common ground about frustrations you have with the work makes people feel less alone and maybe they always feel like a screw up and it’s nice to hear others struggle too.
Finally … when (and if) things start to go better … some group activities can definitely help foster some good juju between coworkers / departments. Maybe a pot luck lunch? … maybe laser tag or go karts? .., bowling?
A agreed night out for drinks and wings?
Whatever it may be … something completely non-work related that helps everyone feel connected and sometimes in those times you will learn things about others that explain things about them you might not know or considered.
Good luck!! … hopefully you can get your tortoise coworkers into hares soon!
I work as part of a new team, where most of the team members are all very experienced with lots of big successes amongst us. We all know how to do our individual parts, and several are experts at several of the jobs required. The problem is, nobody else seems to be doing anything! How can I get these people to step it up and give what I need to do my part? I don’t know what these old coots are doing, but it isn’t getting us a finished product. So how do I get them to step up without alienating them?
Signed,
Too Fast in Texas
Dear Too Fast in Texas,
Oh man, I’ve been there … it’s so incredibly frustrating when you are doing your part and being super successful and fast … and others are just, not. I think a lot of times, I’ve found people to be very intimidated by others who out perform them, and also some jealousy. You have to tread lightly moving forward, cuz it’s a tricky road.
Firstly … positive encouragement goes a LONG way … even when someone does something that isn’t even that big of a deal… start small, don’t go overboard … cuz it will come off insincere. Small bits of praise … a little bit every day … you’d be surprised (or maybe not) how big ego plays into work performance. So that’s one thing you can try.
Another thing I’ve tried… when I’ve noticed that someone is struggling … to encourage conversation… but in a way that doesn’t make it seem like you know they are struggling … more like,
“Hey George.., how’s that [insert job task here] going? … I know when I worked on it that one time I kept screwing up on [insert some common frustration about that job task].. and it made me so annoyed. I ended up doing it this way instead and it’s so much better [describe way to do job task]”
I had this similar thing with my current coworker.., I noticed she was struggling getting a certain task done as fast as me, so I shared how I got annoyed doing it such and such way and I started doing it this way and it’s so much faster and easier.
Sharing common ground about frustrations you have with the work makes people feel less alone and maybe they always feel like a screw up and it’s nice to hear others struggle too.
Finally … when (and if) things start to go better … some group activities can definitely help foster some good juju between coworkers / departments. Maybe a pot luck lunch? … maybe laser tag or go karts? .., bowling?
A agreed night out for drinks and wings?
Whatever it may be … something completely non-work related that helps everyone feel connected and sometimes in those times you will learn things about others that explain things about them you might not know or considered.
Good luck!! … hopefully you can get your tortoise coworkers into hares soon!
crazychemgirl
spoon girl always
- Joined
- Jul 9, 2012
- Posts
- 43,590
If anyone needs advice this thread is here… 
hotwords229_A
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Sep 9, 2017
- Posts
- 20,020
Dear Chemgirl,If anyone needs advice this thread is here…
What is the generally accepted appropriate amount of time before going “Prison Gay”?
Yours truly,
NotInPrisonYetButYouNeverKnow
crazychemgirl
spoon girl always
- Joined
- Jul 9, 2012
- Posts
- 43,590
Send all advice requests via the proper channels please
crazychemgirl
spoon girl always
- Joined
- Jul 9, 2012
- Posts
- 43,590
REMINDER…
Please send all advice requests via PM
Include a pseudonym
Include whether you would like good or bad advice.
Please send all advice requests via PM
Include a pseudonym
Include whether you would like good or bad advice.
BrendaBear
Feral Brat
- Joined
- Sep 16, 2021
- Posts
- 39,430
BrendaBear
Feral Brat
- Joined
- Sep 16, 2021
- Posts
- 39,430
Bumping this… well, kind of pegging it really… because this thread is too fun to be dismissed….
crazychemgirl
spoon girl always
- Joined
- Jul 9, 2012
- Posts
- 43,590
BrendaBear
Feral Brat
- Joined
- Sep 16, 2021
- Posts
- 39,430
OrdinaryPerson
Anal Oprah by SaltF
- Joined
- Nov 30, 2022
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- 12,058
