Dear Litster, once more

[lovetopleasewomen]

She’s a smart woman, isn’t she? She’s better than the speedos of a thousand gloriously muscled, tan, sexy Frenchmen. With their accents and their easy physicality, and dry wit. So well dressed, too.

lmfao! I couldn't have said it better myself!

 

[KarenB59]

Dear Litster,
Enjoyed our chats. Hope they continue soon.

Just waiting till you're ready Litster.

 

[Xerxes82]

Dear Seemingly Random PM Asshat,

You have been put on ignore, since that went from insulting, if unintentionally hilarious, to fucking creepy with a major side of "Whothewha?" in a hurry.

I don't know you. At least under the name you used to PM we haven't had any interaction. Nor it seems, have you with anyone else. What with your single digit post count. And your latest missive, while shedding light on the spiteful screed to which you subjected my inbox this afternoon, has left me perplexed and disturbed.

I have no idea who "she" is, or why you would be messaging me about her. I have no knowledge, nor interest in, her relationship status on Lit or otherwise.

You seem insecure, so allow me to give you my 100% Xerxes Certified, I'm right or your nonexistant money back guarantee: whoever she is, she's not into me. Though the evidence is mounting that I am the least of your worries.

And, just for the record, whoever she turns out to be I sincerely hope she isn't into you either. Because you, my unknown epistolary compadre, seem like one seriously fucked up dude.

Llama, llama, Psycho!, drama, llama, llama, duck.

 

[Misshotndeep]

Dear Seemingly Random PM Asshat,

You have been put on ignore, since that went from insulting, if unintentionally hilarious, to fucking creepy with a major side of "Whothewha?" in a hurry.

I don't know you. At least under the name you used to PM we haven't had any interaction. Nor it seems, have you with anyone else. What with your single digit post count. And your latest missive, while shedding light on the spiteful screed to which you subjected my inbox this afternoon, has left me perplexed and disturbed.

I have no idea who "she" is, or why you would be messaging me about her. I have no knowledge, nor interest in, her relationship status on Lit or otherwise.

You seem insecure, so allow me to give you my 100% Xerxes Certified, I'm right or your nonexistant money back guarantee: whoever she is, she's not into me. Though the evidence is mounting that I am the least of your worries.

And, just for the record, whoever she turns out to be I sincerely hope she isn't into you either. Because you, my unknown epistolary compadre, seem like one seriously fucked up dude.

Llama, llama, Psycho!, drama, llama, llama, duck.

Dear X,

I don’t know who she is either. Kinda scary someone is running around saying shit about folks via PM.
I do agree that the PM sender is cra cra and your post here is hilarious!


Signed,


Slightly functional Tumbleweed

 

[DDBustyBrit]

Dear 1% Litster,

Yes, the honest answer to the last question you caught me off guard with when we spoke...

Same question to you...?

The other 1% Litster

 

[AlwaysFara]

Dear Lit,

Last few weeks here have been brutal. Very bitchy, myself included. I’m over it. I’m trying to turn over a new leaf. I want Lit to make me happy, not angry. Life is good enough at kicking me in the teeth. Amiright?
That being said, if you’re actually a douche, or a horrible person, or are not good for me, I will still treat you as such, without guilt.

For the rest, and for me? I’m trying to dial down the snark.


Let’s see how long this can last.

Yours,
Fara

 

[BadAmy]

Dear Princess Fantasic,
https://media3.giphy.com/media/l0Hed7bSWzhL5Uuxq/giphy.gif?cid=19f5b51a690397f8c1e7d89ab29a54f206214359139eb3ef&rid=giphy.gif
Love. Love.
Boobgripper.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Dear Lit,

Last few weeks here have been brutal. Very bitchy, myself included. I’m over it. I’m trying to turn over a new leaf. I want Lit to make me happy, not angry. Life is good enough at kicking me in the teeth. Amiright?
That being said, if you’re actually a douche, or a horrible person, or are not good for me, I will still treat you as such, without guilt.

For the rest, and for me? I’m trying to dial down the snark.


Let’s see how long this can last.

Yours,
Fara

Following my lead, are you?

 

[LostGirlTink]

Dear Playing nice...

It’s a good reminder I’m trying to keep close.
And when someone (me) seems uncharacteristically cranky we should also hope others remember it.
~I’ll try too
PS I’m still calling out blatant misogyny though

 

[AlwaysFara]

Following my lead, are you?

I’m sorry, I haven’t post stalked you lately.
Maybe we are just TWINSIES!!!



I’m speaking only for me. I’m not Ellen.
-Fara

 

[AlwaysFara]

Dear Princess Fantasic,
https://media3.giphy.com/media/l0Hed7bSWzhL5Uuxq/giphy.gif?cid=19f5b51a690397f8c1e7d89ab29a54f206214359139eb3ef&rid=giphy.gif
Love. Love.
Boobgripper.

Dear Playing nice...

It’s a good reminder I’m trying to keep close.
And when someone (me) seems uncharacteristically cranky we should also hope others remember it.
~I’ll try too
PS I’m still calling out blatant misogyny though

 

[lovetopleasewomen]

Dear Lit,

Last few weeks here have been brutal. Very bitchy, myself included. I’m over it. I’m trying to turn over a new leaf. I want Lit to make me happy, not angry. Life is good enough at kicking me in the teeth. Amiright?
That being said, if you’re actually a douche, or a horrible person, or are not good for me, I will still treat you as such, without guilt.

For the rest, and for me? I’m trying to dial down the snark.


Let’s see how long this can last.

Yours,
Fara

So Litster Lady,

Lemme get this straight, you're trading in all your whips, chains & big sticks for what...smiles, hugs & kisses?

Giving it a week Litster.

 

[AlwaysFara]

So Litster Lady,

Lemme get this straight, you're trading in all your whips, chains & big sticks for what...smiles, hugs & kisses?

Giving it a week Litster.

Week,

That’s not what I said. I will dial it DOWN.
Maybe... A notch. A NOTCH!!!
That’s how much it will be dialed back.

Uno nacho.

Yours,
Fara

 

[lovetopleasewomen]

Week,

That’s not what I said. I will dial it DOWN.
Maybe... A notch. A NOTCH!!!
That’s how much it will be dialed back.

Uno nacho.

Yours,
Fara

Yours,

Mine? Ummm...no. So, just dialing down a notch you say. That's good news. I was getting concerned. I bought all this popcorn & started thinking I wouldn't have a reason to eat any of it. Thanx for settling my mind.

Relaxed Litster.

 

[Shi_One81]

Dear Litster who shattered my heart and no longer posts here,

I fucking hate you. I thought I still had love for you, but today I saw your photo along with your ugly assed jalapeño horse faced looking wife (that’s me being nice folks), and it hit me how bad you did me and what a fucking no good piece of shit you are. Who leaves their girlfriend when they’re pregnant? Who cheats on their wife with men and women multiple times throughout their marriage? Who cheats on their girlfriend while she’s in the fucking hospital? That’s right, you! You fucking piece of shit! Why did it take me so long to remove the rose colored glasses? I know I need to forgive you, but there is so much hate in my heart for you right now. Enjoy life with your meth head!

 

[tnman03]

Dear Litster who shattered my heart and no longer posts here,

I fucking hate you. I thought I still had love for you, but today I saw your photo along with your ugly assed jalapeño horse faced looking wife (that’s me being nice folks), and it hit me how bad you did me and what a fucking no good piece of shit you are. Who leaves their girlfriend when they’re pregnant? Who cheats on their wife with men and women multiple times throughout their marriage? Who cheats on their girlfriend while she’s in the fucking hospital? That’s right, you! You fucking piece of shit! Why did it take me so long to remove the rose colored glasses? I know I need to forgive you, but there is so much hate in my heart for you right now. Enjoy life with your meth head!

His loss... truly...his loss.

 

[AlwaysFara]

Yours,

Mine? Ummm...no. So, just dialing down a notch you say. That's good news. I was getting concerned. I bought all this popcorn & started thinking I wouldn't have a reason to eat any of it. Thanx for settling my mind.

Relaxed Litster.

Relaxed,

Don’t get your balls twerked.

I sign most of my DL’s “Yours.”

Which is a bit snarky.


-Nacho Fara

 

[AlwaysFara]

Dear Litster who shattered my heart and no longer posts here,

I fucking hate you. I thought I still had love for you, but today I saw your photo along with your ugly assed jalapeño horse faced looking wife (that’s me being nice folks), and it hit me how bad you did me and what a fucking no good piece of shit you are. Who leaves their girlfriend when they’re pregnant? Who cheats on their wife with men and women multiple times throughout their marriage? Who cheats on their girlfriend while she’s in the fucking hospital? That’s right, you! You fucking piece of shit! Why did it take me so long to remove the rose colored glasses? I know I need to forgive you, but there is so much hate in my heart for you right now. Enjoy life with your meth head!

Dear Finger,


You don’t need to forgive him.
Forgive yourself for being blinded by love. We’ve all been there.

/me

 

[BlackCashmere]

Dear Lit,

Last few weeks here have been brutal. Very bitchy, myself included. I’m over it. I’m trying to turn over a new leaf. I want Lit to make me happy, not angry. Life is good enough at kicking me in the teeth. Amiright?
That being said, if you’re actually a douche, or a horrible person, or are not good for me, I will still treat you as such, without guilt.

For the rest, and for me? I’m trying to dial down the snark.


Let’s see how long this can last.

Yours,
Fara

Hug...

 

[Shi_One81]

Dear Finger,


You don’t need to forgive him.
Forgive yourself for being blinded by love. We’ve all been there.

/me

Can we have like a photo/momento/etc. burning party, please? I did sell the last thing he got me for Christmas.

 

[AlwaysFara]

Can we have like a photo/momento/etc. burning party, please? I did sell the last thing he got me for Christmas.

Dear Pyro,

As you wish.

I did that once. It actually helped me feel better.

Let me Know!
road trip ready Litster

 

[rubydlite]

Dear fire happy litsters,

How can you bring yourself to burn memories?
I still have his ...turkey making in an apron photos ... plus more on my phone...

Signed....still craves the damn stuffing years later ...litster

 

[AlwaysFara]

Dear fire happy litsters,

How can you bring yourself to burn memories?
I still have his ...turkey making in an apron photos ... plus more on my phone...

Signed....still craves the damn stuffing years later ...litster

Dear Stuffed,

I dunno. I guess... We all gotta let go our own way.

Post the stuffing recipe?
Then I’ll remember him, too!

Signed,
Wants to crave

 

[lovetopleasewomen]

Relaxed,

Don’t get your balls twerked.

I sign most of my DL’s “Yours.”

Which is a bit snarky.


-Nacho Fara

Not mine...

Ohh don't worry. My balls stay just fine. I don't allow them to get twerked....at least in an unloving way that is.

Like to spread yourself around do ya?

Singularly me

 

[Shi_One81]

Dear Pyro,

As you wish.

I did that once. It actually helped me feel better.

Let me Know!
road trip ready Litster

Dear fire happy litsters,

How can you bring yourself to burn memories?
I still have his ...turkey making in an apron photos ... plus more on my phone...

Signed....still craves the damn stuffing years later ...litster

Dear Stuffed,

I dunno. I guess... We all gotta let go our own way.

Post the stuffing recipe?
Then I’ll remember him, too!

Signed,
Wants to crave

It’s either burn the shit or end up needing bail money, there is no happy medium here.
I would also love the stuffing recipe. It’ll help me while I eat my feelings.