Does your SO know you write smut?

[TheLobster]

Wow, I did not expect such a high number of writers with spouses unaware. I am actually shocked and kind of disappointed but I am not sure why that bothers me so much.

I have a hunch that responses to this thread can’t be a representative sample. Writers with supportive SOs (or other people in their life who know about and support their creative endeavors) may be less likely to feel the need to participate in a forum like this in the first place.

 

[OverconfidentSarcasm]

I have a hunch that responses to this thread can’t be a representative sample. Writers with supportive SOs (or other people in their life who know about and support their creative endeavors) may be less likely to feel the need to participate in a forum like this in the first place.

Really? I would have expected the exact opposite.

I would have thought that, since most of the stories on this site are not exactly vanilla stuff in the romance category, and people tend to assume that the stuff we write about has to be reflective of our own wants and fantasies, that makes it hard to tell an SO about your writing. And if you do tell them, and they accept/even support you, that's something noteworthy people would be happy to share.

 

[allthepiercings]

My husband knows and will read what I write. It started out as something I did for him during his deployments. I would send him some pictures as well as a story and once he returned he said how much he enjoyed it.

 

[DrHappy]

Yes! She loved my stores and suggested that I start publishing them here.

 

[VallesMarineris]

In my case no and if she found out I'd be dead.

I never show what I'm writing to anyone, not even the non-erotic stuff. No one knows I even write.

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away I wrote "real" literature, got published in little literary mags, had an agent for a while. I only showed one person my drafts, my SO at the time. That was a bad idea. She might not like how I portrayed some characters because she thought it was embarrassing; she might like parts I didn't like and planned to revise. On the whole I found it to be inhibiting. Friends knew I was writing, but when they asked about it I would ignore them.

I stopped writing for a while because I found other outlets for my creativity and skills that earned more praise and esteem (and way more money) for much less effort.

Got back into it recently through this site. I had been writing erotica before but never had an outlet (and never showed it to my SO). I may publish some of them here after heavy revision.

I suppose if my current SO found out about my avocation she'd accept it, but I don't feel the need. I have a member on this site who reads my stuff and gives feedback. That's helpful and I could use a few more readers. But friends or SO or family? NFW.

 

[YDB95]

She's the one who introduced me to Lit, so yes.

 

[jaykaythree]

Yes. And he's been a character once or twice.

As mine also knows, and likewise has been.

 

[EmilyMiller]

I have a hunch that responses to this thread can’t be a representative sample. Writers with supportive SOs (or other people in their life who know about and support their creative endeavors) may be less likely to feel the need to participate in a forum like this in the first place.

Why?

Emily (who has a supportive SO)

 

[Dark_Logan_]

No - and I suspect the first response would be she won’t believe it closely followed by the second response that might be a little angry.

I’m not sure what that says about our relationship so I don’t over think it

 

[Syzoth]

My wife does not know.

Considering that she's muse and main character of most of my stories, she'd be either touched or horrified!