Down the rabbit hole

[Apisto42]

I’ve been thinking about this as I slowly go through 25 years of accumulated stuff. The garage is full of boxes from our last move. These boxes were packed in a tropical country, spent time on a container ship and then storage and then stored in a garage for 12 years because we were busy living.

We were busy doing projects, traveling, doing new things. So all these projects from what is now a previous life, sat in boxes. And we knew there was a good chance that all this stuff as already ruined, but like cat in the box, we didn’t know.

Every box I’ve opened has been fuvked in some way. So it’s load the trailer and go to the dump.

And it’s upsetting. Not because this stuff is ruined, but because of all the things left undone. I have very few regrets for the things that were done for good or ill. But I’m grieving for all the things she wanted to do that will never be done.

That is one I didn’t really expect how hard it was going to hit.

 

[Apisto42]

A little bit of Americana for happy. Had to stop and take a pic on the way to the dump. I like watching the corn grow.

 

[cheekygirl75]

I’ve been thinking about this as I slowly go through 25 years of accumulated stuff. The garage is full of boxes from our last move. These boxes were packed in a tropical country, spent time on a container ship and then storage and then stored in a garage for 12 years because we were busy living.

We were busy doing projects, traveling, doing new things. So all these projects from what is now a previous life, sat in boxes. And we knew there was a good chance that all this stuff as already ruined, but like cat in the box, we didn’t know.

Every box I’ve opened has been fuvked in some way. So it’s load the trailer and go to the dump.

And it’s upsetting. Not because this stuff is ruined, but because of all the things left undone. I have very few regrets for the things that were done for good or ill. But I’m grieving for all the things she wanted to do that will never be done.

That is one I didn’t really expect how hard it was going to hit.

 

[Zumbamami_69]

And it’s upsetting. Not because this stuff is ruined, but because of all the things left undone. I have very few regrets for the things that were done for good or ill. But I’m grieving for all the things she wanted to do that will never be done.

That's what hits me, too. All those thoughts, dreams, and plans that never materialized.

That's the insidiously selfish part of grief that you can't prepare for - just live through. But, maybe... when a little time has passed, you can revisit those dreams, make plans, and take a brave leap: to do them.

 

[Apisto42]

That's what hits me, too. All those thoughts, dreams, and plans that never materialized.

That's the insidiously selfish part of grief that you can't prepare for - just live through. But, maybe... when a little time has passed, you can revisit those dreams, make plans, and take a brave leap: to do them.

Oh hell no. These were her projects.

My shit is neat and organized and contained in tubs with only a messy project desk.

But I appreciate the sentiment.

Travel though - yes. We’re making plans to go places that we all wanted to go.

 

[Zumbamami_69]

Oh hell no. These were her projects.

My shit is neat and organized and contained in tubs with only a messy project desk.

But I appreciate the sentiment.

Travel though - yes. We’re making plans to go places that we all wanted to go.

OH!!! Oops. My bad. I completely misread it as "shared projects." That was my complicated grief informing my comment.

Travel. Yes! Anywhere and everywhere!

 

[Apisto42]

OH!!! Oops. My bad. I completely misread it as "shared projects." That was my complicated grief informing my comment.

Travel. Yes! Anywhere and everywhere!

Wellllll, her projects were also my projects by default.

Secret: it’s actually quite freeing to be absolved of the responsibility of doing things that needed to be done that I wasn’t that interested in doing in the first place.

And that’s okay.

 

[SparkleFur]

I’ve been thinking about this as I slowly go through 25 years of accumulated stuff. The garage is full of boxes from our last move. These boxes were packed in a tropical country, spent time on a container ship and then storage and then stored in a garage for 12 years because we were busy living.

We were busy doing projects, traveling, doing new things. So all these projects from what is now a previous life, sat in boxes. And we knew there was a good chance that all this stuff as already ruined, but like cat in the box, we didn’t know.

Every box I’ve opened has been fuvked in some way. So it’s load the trailer and go to the dump.

And it’s upsetting. Not because this stuff is ruined, but because of all the things left undone. I have very few regrets for the things that were done for good or ill. But I’m grieving for all the things she wanted to do that will never be done.

That is one I didn’t really expect how hard it was going to hit.

Sigh. I keep thinking of places we were going to go, and things he's missing (like the World Cup.) It's the worst. I'm sorry.