For my American Friends

[Womanlover]

LMAO SKIBUM!!!!

What Canada has supplied to the USA

1. Ginger Ale
2. Hockey
3. Walt Disney
4. Hockey, eh!
5. Art Linkletter
6. Natural Gas
7. Wayne Gretzky, eh!
8. Snowbirds to comfort Floridians, and Arizonans.
9. Game show hosts, and newscast people by the score.
10. Men for your women whenever you have a war to attend!
11. Hockey players
12. Beaver pelts
13. Terrorists who get into your country through ours because the assholes who govern ours are such bleeding hearts they'll let ANYONE in!
14. Water
15. Hockey sticks and skates.
16. Drugs
17. Several thousands of Canadian lunatic mercenaries who jumped at the chance to go to Vietnam to help you, and were referred to in news articles as "BRITISH"
18. Entertainers, especially comedians and musicians.
19. That cold north wind.
20. Bacon
21. Haven for lotsa draft dodgers.
22. Haven for your murderers.
23. Some damn good hunting and fishing.
24. Material for some damn funny jokes, songs and movies!
25. Did I mention hockey?

Finally, Canadians have supplied you with a constant barrage of mocking, criticism, and hyocritical judgementalism and we've told any other country attempting to do the same to "shut the fuck up and leave our friends alone!!!"

 

[Expertise]

That puts it quite well.

Your like an irritating sibling. A real pain in the ass who we love to torment. But just let someone else try to fuck with you and we'll be there standing by your side... whispering in your ear to stay the hell out trouble next time ya big dope.

You can be a pain but you're "family"

 

[April]

Cold north wind? Where the hell did it go? I didn't get any! I WANT MY COLD NORTH WIND!!!

*walking away muttering* Damn Canadians. Cheated me out of the cold north wind.

just kidding, by the way

 

[Womanlover]

Cold north wind? Where the hell did it go? I didn't get any! I WANT MY COLD NORTH WIND!!!

*walking away muttering* Damn Canadians. Cheated me out of the cold north wind.

just kidding, by the way

I'll special deliver it to you, April, honey, and bring along a warm, downfilled, Canadian sleeping bag for two for us to snuggle in..........!!!

*gives you Eskimo nose rub*

 

[April]

Aww, thank you. That's just so sweet. Oh, can you bring some of those lovely northern lights with you?

 

[Gaucho]

Womanlover, you forgot William Shatner.

"This is going to be big, really BIG!"
"What is, your gut? Put your girdle back on, you big pussy."

The truth is that we share a common - mainly european - heritage and a long, fucking border. Beyond that, well...I think Canada has always been a little suspicious of the US because they saw what we tried to do in Mexico (as far as taking over that country goes) and wondered if they might be next. Borders are just lines on a map, after all, and it wouldn't be the first time we'd tried to expand ours.

Seriously though, I would like to think of the two countries as brothers. And of course we irritate you. We irritate everybody! We're too big, too loud, and too full of ourselves not to. And like the T in James T. Kirk, we always manage to find trouble, or it seems to find us.

And it's nice to know that when the shit goes down, we've got somebody watching our back to the north.

 

[April]

Womanlover, you forgot William Shatner.

"This is going to be big, really BIG!"
"What is, your gut? Put your girdle back on, you big pussy."

LMFAO Damn, that's funny!

 

[Womanlover]

And if anyone tries anything Gaucho, they have no idea how it hurts to get a hockey stick across the shins on a cold day..........and if that doesn't work we'll fart at them!!!! Nya ha ha ha ha!

 

[Expertise]

I always figured Shatner as a closet cross dresser.

He was...cool...with... the green chicks...from....Rigel 5....and that....stacatto, pause....delivery though.

 

[Womanlover]

April, my sweet darlin American honey pie...........yes, I was hoping I could help you see those lights when you bell rings!!!!

 

[April]

What is it with the Canadians? Are y'all over sexed or something? Not that I'm really complaining, you know.

 

[Gaucho]

What is it with the Canadians? Are y'all over sexed or something? Not that I'm really complaining, you know.

It's U.S. penis envy.

 

[Expertise]

Its fucking freezing 6 months of the year up here. "Indoor Sports" are preferred in these here climes..... stuff like couch rugby. LOL

 

[sallygirl]

Canadian domination

Canadians WILL someday rule the world. We have a plan! Check it out! (and you thought we were so "nice") hehehe
I found the Hate Mail section particularly humourous.

http://www.standonguard.com/

 

[Womanlover]

Let's, see.......hmmmmmm.........YES!!!! Literotica, which is a site all about sex, comes to you from our most famous southern province, California!!!!!


I'll let "JEAN CLAUDE" answer you April: "Eh, ApRIL, you know dat in da wintAIRE, dat sex is one of da bes way to get warm eh?"

 

[Womanlover]

Besides, we started a fucking country and nobody came...............we gotta populate the damn place now!!!!

 

[Cheri]

I'll let "JEAN CLAUDE" answer you April: "Eh, ApRIL, you know dat in da wintAIRE, dat sex is one of da bes way to get warm eh?"

I need to get my ass to Toronto and quick!

 

[Womanlover]

I'll let "JEAN CLAUDE" answer you April: "Eh, ApRIL, you know dat in da wintAIRE, dat sex is one of da bes way to get warm eh?"

I need to get my ass to Toronto and quick!

No, no, Cherie............Jean Claude is ere, in da 4 story igloo belongING to dat WomanLOVAIRE........an' he live ere in VancouVAIRE!

You cum over ere, eh, an' Jean Claude look after you good!

 

[Expertise]

Jean Claude ees much too beesy eating Pepsi an "Mae West" for breakfas'

While 'e is at de depaneur getting 'ees smokes, cause in Quebec dey smoke like it ees a cure for cancer, come see Sebastien.

Zee licks of mon tongue zey will bring you to dee new 'eights of sensualite' and orgasme.

 

[Cheri]

You cum over ere, eh, an' Jean Claude look after you good!

So mail poor (literally) me all the details!

Oh Exp baby, could my crush on you grow any bigger?

 

[Womanlover]

Hey Expertise, don't you just love it that..........."tongue" is of FEMININE gender in french...........mmmmmmmmmmmmmm........there is a that beautiful word again.........*sigh, pant pant*


Ah, Chere April, j'aimerais bien toucher a TA LANGUE avec la mienne!!!!

translation: I wanna go to first base with you April!

 

[Expertise]

Hunh!? Crush? WTF?

Am I exuding some kinda' cyber pheremone lately? This is all making me a little uneasy.

 

[April]

Oh my! Now knock it off, my sister is watching! LOL

 

[Expertise]

Whoops! I'm rusty and I was in a hurry.

 

[April]

Aww, Expertise, you're just cyber-yummy lately! Enjoy it.