Haiku

[AlinaX]

give me a button
that turns me on, gets me off,
and sends me to sleep

 

[Bamagan]

You have that button!
If mashing it doesn't work,
try twisting your dials.

 

[Candy_Kane54]

Length, width, depth, and time
Describe the dimensions of
Einstein's Universe.

 

[AlinaX]

but the poetry
is in christoffel's symbols -
what elegant curves!

 

[Candy_Kane54]

Chrisoffel symbols ...

Riemann curvature tensors ...​

What does it all mean?

 

[Bamagan]

It means space puckers,
tightens and clenches and then,
the universe squirts.

 

[AlinaX]

write me the metric
in mathematical script
of a woman's breast

 

[Bamagan]

The formula is:
nipples times volume times mass
always equals yum

 

[AlinaX]

all about cup size:
how many spoons of sugar
in a double D?

 

[Bamagan]

Well, are we talking
Tease spoons or the table ones?
The count will differ.

Either way, of course
Titties so sweet will make you
A diabetic

 

[Bamagan]

Two cups make a pint,
So every bra is thus
Two boobs shy a quart

 

[AlinaX]

young poker-stripped jo
flushed red from daddy's sweet hand
while mom holds 'em high

 

[Bamagan]

young poker-stripped jo
flushed red from daddy's sweet hand
while mom holds 'em high

A great game, hold 'em,
but always make sure to leave
an ace in the hole

 

[Candy_Kane54]

Sometimes, a bluff is
Required when your hole cards are
Not helping you out.

 

[Candy_Kane54]

A deuce and trey in
The hole only works with four,
five, and six face up.

 

[Bamagan]

Keep your hole private
At least until we can flop
and see if they fit

 

[Voboy]

Parents, once so strong,
Brittle. Scary in weakness.
Now I wait, fretting.

 

[Candy_Kane54]

I've always wondered
What meter should be used for
a proper Haiku?

 

[AlinaX]

if it's erotic
then measure it in inches
or in cup sizes

 

[Candy_Kane54]

Does meter even
matter when writing Haikus?
(or is it Haiki?)

 

[Candy_Kane54]

Itchy and Scratchy:
A fictional cartoon or
A skin condition?

 

[Bamagan]

Every ep of
Itchy and Scratchy is real,
but so is dandruff.

 

[AlinaX]

disposable love
if she's not inflatable
maybe she'll blow you

 

[AlinaX]

all these rimalicks
have my tongue in a tangle
of sour-tasting threads

 

[Bamagan]

Aye, the saltiness
Makes the board resemble a
Bukkake target