How to help my girl multiple

[Quiet Listener]

My girlfriend is capable of going from one orgasm to the next when masturbating by herself, usually using a vibe. When we have sex, though after the first she has a really hard time reaching a second orgasm, let alone a third, even though it doesn't take her very long to get close. She seems to get stuck on the edge, and says she feels "overwhelmed." Is there anyone else who has experienced this, or who can give me some pointers on how to help?

 

[Commendatore]

Build up to everything in a calm, sexy, lingering fashion. When you get to the heavy foreplayishness, really take your time. Go down on her like she's your last meal, lick her asshole, indulge any special kinks or proclivities, keep her simmering always. Most women faced with this have a problem "letting go" psychologically when faced with a partner...could be expectations, performance anxiety, life distractions, etc. There's less of this when people are on their own. Always remember that a woman's sexual gratification begins with her life as a whole, not just what happens in the sack. The more relaxed and confident she is day-to-day, the more and harder she can and will come when the time, uh, comes. Give her something to look forward to and fantasize about to build the suspense...a smutty gift, a planned indulgence just for her, etc. Women tend to be, but aren't always, much more affected by the psychological implications of sex than men. Remove extraneous pressures, relax and be relaxed, and worship her flesh and her mind, whether you top/bottom/switch/vanilla. Don't be afraid to include toys in the play. It doesn't demean your prowess, it shows that you're confident and take her enjoyment seriously. All women's orgasmic responses are different, so ymmv.

 

[SweetErika]

Are multiple orgasms something SHE wants, or is it more your goal?

Have you tried bringing the vibe into the equation? I find it's much easier to have multiples with a vibe - it's just a different type of stimulation that works.

Has she tried masturbating to multiples when you're together?

When she gets stuck, are you taking a break so her body can reset itself?

Are you putting any kind of pressure on her to orgasm more than once? Is she putting pressure on herself? The quickest way to kill an orgasm is to try to force it.

 

[Commendatore]

Are multiple orgasms something SHE wants, or is it more your goal?

Have you tried bringing the vibe into the equation? I find it's much easier to have multiples with a vibe - it's just a different type of stimulation that works.

Has she tried masturbating to multiples when you're together?

When she gets stuck, are you taking a break so her body can reset itself?

Are you putting any kind of pressure on her to orgasm more than once? Is she putting pressure on herself? The quickest way to kill an orgasm is to try to force it.

Extremely good points.

 

[southernsara]

She needs to feel completely relaxed and uninhibited. Maybe lots of playing and teasing beforehand.
Also, there is an amazing vibe for two. I cannot remember what it's called, but it has two little bullets attached and slides over the penis. I swear I cum instantly (and often) when we use it!

My girlfriend is capable of going from one orgasm to the next when masturbating by herself, usually using a vibe. When we have sex, though after the first she has a really hard time reaching a second orgasm, let alone a third, even though it doesn't take her very long to get close. She seems to get stuck on the edge, and says she feels "overwhelmed." Is there anyone else who has experienced this, or who can give me some pointers on how to help?

 

[Quiet Listener]

I'll admit that the life aspect could use some work, it seems like we always have something going on, which makes being romantic/smutty a bit tricky, and robs time from foreplay, which we both really enjoy. Something to work on for sure.

I think the one time we got to three, we did use a vibe, which ended up in vibe heaven, and I really ought to replace it. I'll keep the ring in mind as well.

Multiples isn't something I pressure her to do at all, but I fear that she probably is pressuring herself on some level, which might be holding her back. Masturbating with each other is something I'd like to try, and we'll just see how that works out. Thanks for all your suggestions, everyone!

If there is someone who has an idea of how to get that pressure off of her, I'd love to hear it.

 

[Elisabetha]

I'll admit that the life aspect could use some work, it seems like we always have something going on, which makes being romantic/smutty a bit tricky, and robs time from foreplay, which we both really enjoy. Something to work on for sure.

I think the one time we got to three, we did use a vibe, which ended up in vibe heaven, and I really ought to replace it. I'll keep the ring in mind as well.

Multiples isn't something I pressure her to do at all, but I fear that she probably is pressuring herself on some level, which might be holding her back. Masturbating with each other is something I'd like to try, and we'll just see how that works out. Thanks for all your suggestions, everyone!

If there is someone who has an idea of how to get that pressure off of her, I'd love to hear it.

You could try getting her just a little bit drunk before starting. I usually find that that helps bunches in forgetting about everyday things. Just not falling over drunk, but pleasantly tipsy.

 

[VelvetSin]

I'll admit that the life aspect could use some work, it seems like we always have something going on, which makes being romantic/smutty a bit tricky, and robs time from foreplay, which we both really enjoy. Something to work on for sure.

I think the one time we got to three, we did use a vibe, which ended up in vibe heaven, and I really ought to replace it. I'll keep the ring in mind as well.

Multiples isn't something I pressure her to do at all, but I fear that she probably is pressuring herself on some level, which might be holding her back. Masturbating with each other is something I'd like to try, and we'll just see how that works out. Thanks for all your suggestions, everyone!

If there is someone who has an idea of how to get that pressure off of her, I'd love to hear it.

The only times I've ever multipled in my life is when I've been tied down and blindfolded. It takes all the "fight" out of me, whether it be wanting to pleasure him, poorly timed thoughts drifting through my mind (of the "I forgot to swap the laundry loads, must remember to do that before sleep," variety most often), pressuring myself to multiple by participation, or whatever. I can't even do it during 'alone time' because I tend to fall in the category of putting too much pressure on myself. When restrained, there's little choice but to relax and enjoy whatever is coming my way.

Perhaps that's something that might work? First, you'll need to learn all the hot spots on your girl, her preferred masturbation methods, and yeah, I'd recommend replacing the toy also (the Hitachi Magic Wand isn't insertable but it's still the best device on the market and works great on sore muscles elsewhere, too). Pick up some silk scarves or a cheap restraint kit from Amazon.com (they have ones that tie to head- and foot-boards, or ones that fit under the mattress if you lack a headboard with tie-down spots) and work it into a lengthy foreplay session. Tell her to relax and let you play with her for a while, without throwing in that you're going for multiples. Then build her up.

That may or may not work for her, or may or may not be something one or both of you would be into, but it's the only thing that works for me.

 

[SweetErika]

I'd recommend replacing the toy also (the Hitachi Magic Wand isn't insertable but it's still the best device on the market and works great on sore muscles elsewhere, too).

You can get the insertable attachments with the hitachi for like $5-10 more as a package deal. The blue vinyl ones are both boil- and dishwasher-safe, and simply amazing for vaginal, g-spot, cock and anal play. I use the g-spot one for clit stimulation because I've never liked the feel of the hitachi head by itself.

 

[Mr.G]

Can't help myself

Have you read : https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=70892

From my experience multiples from G-Spotting can be completely addictive.

What so many men (women too) don't understand is how inefficient intercourse is when it cums to producing orgasms. It is enormously intimate and satisfying that way but the plumbing is mostly all wrong for producing orgasms.

Depending on your trust/love level and how self-confident she is with her body and how well she knows it that alone can be a long learning process. Being intimate together and not just having intercourse can increase the bonding and trust so she CAN relax and cum easily. Some women are clearly just born "lucky" and find they are multi-orgasmic form the git-go. Others have to learn and have to overcome all kinds of psychological, moral, religious barriers that limit the amount of pleasure they are "allowed" to have.

I've found that with the GSpot technique (along with everything else you do) you can go from insane intensity where she's pleading for a break, barely able to breath let alone think ... to slow loving rolling orgasms that just has her sighing and wanting to snuggle (oxytocin levels spiking). All this can happen with and FOR her without the guy having to perform or get the angle just right when he's having intercourse. It also allows a woman to discover many of those "SPOTS" Erica mentioned - spots many couple never discover because they just screw and rarely if ever explore in an intimate way what the other one likes, turns them on or is so new or intense it takes multiple attempts for them to become comfortable with their lover having THAT much control over them.

Lots of communication. Lots of non-screwing intimacy and if you haven't tried the GSpot technique, give it a shot or 50. SHe may find that learning to orgasm over and over on your thumb or finger will help her do the same when you're having intercourse too.

 

[VelvetSin]

You can get the insertable attachments with the hitachi for like $5-10 more as a package deal. The blue vinyl ones are both boil- and dishwasher-safe, and simply amazing for vaginal, g-spot, cock and anal play. I use the g-spot one for clit stimulation because I've never liked the feel of the hitachi head by itself.

Oh, I have them. I just wanted to make it clear that the wand itself isn't insertable. (I was so excited when I first got it, I bought one for a good friend too, and she got giggly with panic at the thought of putting 'it there' until I explained it's not that kind of toy and that's what the attachments are for.) There was a sale on Amazon.com going a week or so ago where you could get two attachments plus a pointless mini vibe for just $1 more than the wand itself, but it looks like that has passed because the "deluxe kit" is now $56~, still well worth the money and there's no endless supply of batteries to keep the cost ramped up. The only attachment I like is the g-spot one, but I think I prefer it all by itself This thread details some additional reviews on the wonder-toy. Highly recommended for any woman, or any man that likes to make their lady-friend quiver in ways other than the standard.

On Mr. G's suggestions, we've tried but haven't gotten it to work yet. It feels good (don't mistake my meaning!) but hasn't happened yet.