I haven't had an orgasm in...well, never.

[Roc_crawl]

I must agree with all the previous posters...

The Magic Wand is truly magical...my Mrs. uses it for a quick orgasm (less than 3 minutes) a couple of times a week and finds it very helpful.

When we first dated and then married, she had trouble reaching orgasm. We introduced vibrating toys into our sex play and found that her orgasm almost always requires direct, consistent, high-frequency clitoral stimulation. She crosses the "O" boundary without them from time to time but her "never-say-die" battery powered friend is oh so helpful.

At first she felt some guilt for not being able to achieve orgasm without the help afforded by vibrating "friends"...after some considerable talk and convincing I was able to help her understand that it was perfectly okay for her to need help, want help and enjoy help...that I was not the least bit put off by her difficulty having orgasms and felt no concern that it was something lacking in my efforts. In time, she has come to enjoy play with toys of various types and the added benefit of me hovering around stimulating her from various angles with various parts of my body.

In the end, she has come to understand that it's part of what makes her her...that it's not "help" as I stated before but part of what makes her orgasm what it is...it's not "special", "weird" or "abnormal" but a part of her having sex...

As swingers, we have sex with other partners regularly and we always take her vibrating egg at the very least. She becomes aroused in ways I can't adequately describe when she's playing with multiple men but still likes some "consistent, high frequency vibration" from time to time. One of our friends told us that he appreciated her using it because he felt less pressure to perform and was able to enjoy the sex more.

Keep trying various combinations and you'll find what works...and then, of course, practice makes perfect!

FYI...Mrs. Roc's favorite position is face down with a pillow folded in half between her legs with the vibrating device between her clit and the pillow...she can adjust pressure to her liking and I can stimulate her vulva and anus with various techniques (my tongue being MY favorite)...this ALWAYS results in her hitting the promised land.

 

[lks2bite]

Thanks everyone!!! all of this advice is extremely helpful...truely.

It makes me not feel so "weird" or alone.

 

[Friendly_Guy]

Thanks everyone!!! all of this advice is extremely helpful...truely.

It makes me not feel so "weird" or alone.

There's nothing weird about you at all. We are all different with our own different issues / problems / quirks. If you are weird, then we all are in one way or another.

 

[doncarlos]

Stop worrying about having an orgasm, and get thee a Hitachi Magic Wand w/ attachments.

Seriously, plenty of women in their 30s, 40s, 50s and beyond have had their first orgasms with the Magic Wand. Add it to relaxation and a great story/fantasy, and you should be good to go. I suggest the attachments because the wand itself doesn't provide stimulation that's focused enough for some women (like myself).

Like the OP my GF has had a problem all her life reaching orgasm with a partner but my GF can get a release from masturbation when she is alone. I have given her extensive oral, use of an array of dildos and vibes as well as masturbation similar to her personal MO, -all without the big O. She is a very sexual woman who gets extremely aroused by what I do, in fact other than climaxing she is probably the most sexual woman I have known.

Influenced also by this thread I have acquired the Hitachi Magic Wand with two blue attachments with two protrusions, a curved and a straight one.

The question is how to best apply the new Hitachi in our particular situation.?

I assume a good deal of foreplay is advisable and gentleness and softness is in order before the quite substantial 12 inch hardware is introduced.

I would be grateful for specific advice. My GF and I hope for a lasting relationship and she has a strong desire to feel 'as a complete woman' by orgasming with me. Despite my protestations she claims that is vital for our future.

 

[satindesire]

Like the OP my GF has had a problem all her life reaching orgasm with a partner but my GF can get a release from masturbation when she is alone. I have given her extensive oral, use of an array of dildos and vibes as well as masturbation similar to her personal MO, -all without the big O. She is a very sexual woman who gets extremely aroused by what I do, in fact other than climaxing she is probably the most sexual woman I have known.

Influenced also by this thread I have acquired the Hitachi Magic Wand with two blue attachments with two protrusions, a curved and a straight one.

The question is how to best apply the new Hitachi in our particular situation.?

I assume a good deal of foreplay is advisable and gentleness and softness is in order before the quite substantial 12 inch hardware is introduced.

I would be grateful for specific advice. My GF and I hope for a lasting relationship and she has a strong desire to feel 'as a complete woman' by orgasming with me. Despite my protestations she claims that is vital for our future.

The best way to do it is let HER control the vibrator while you use another toy or your fingers on her, or have intercourse with her. That way she can stimulate her clitoris whichever way she wants and feels best to her. If you try and control the vibe for her, she might not get the perfect stimulation she may need to finally reach the big O with a partner.

 

[doncarlos]

The best way to do it is let HER control the vibrator while you use another toy or your fingers on her, or have intercourse with her. That way she can stimulate her clitoris whichever way she wants and feels best to her. If you try and control the vibe for her, she might not get the perfect stimulation she may need to finally reach the big O with a partner.

Thank you for making such an excellent point. My only concern is that the H-Wand is so much larger than any toy she has ever seen before and it may scare the hell out of her.

The Wand which is marketed as a general body massager comes with two attachments that clearly are meant for sex. What are the relative merits of using the Wand with or without an attachment? How do you use that heavy equipment while having intercourse? Except for Doggie it is hard to see how you get the Wand to the clitoris while having sex.

 

[satindesire]

Thank you for making such an excellent point. My only concern is that the H-Wand is so much larger than any toy she has ever seen before and it may scare the hell out of her.

The Wand which is marketed as a general body massager comes with two attachments that clearly are meant for sex. What are the relative merits of using the Wand with or without an attachment? How do you use that heavy equipment while having intercourse? Except for Doggie it is hard to see how you get the Wand to the clitoris while having sex.

Any small clitoral bullet-style vibrator should be less intimidating then. They're inexpensive and super easy to find.

I've never used any attachments with the Hitachi so I can't tell you the merits of using with, but since I'm 100% wholly clitorally focused, penetrative toys mean zip to my satisfaction anyway.

Doggy style can be awkward but you can access the clitoris properly, but my husband and I use a certain position for greatest ease and comfort for both of us.

Usually I lay on the edge of the bed with my butt on the edge, legs off the edge with feet resting on the floor. We lay down some pillows for his comfort, then he kneels on the pillows (knees on the pillows, that is) so that we can still have intercourse but there's plenty of room for the Hitachi.

Smaller clitoral vibes are MUCH easier to use. I broke mine ages ago and haven't purchased another, so we've been using the Hitachi instead. When it comes to intercourse, though, the smaller vibes are easier to use in more positions.

 

[smartarse]

Don't know how much help this will be....

After a number of short term partners and 2 LTRs I had never had an orgasm. Probably a combination of youth and inexperience followed by choosing 2 partners who were totally focused on themselves. The second of these pretty much put me off all thoughts sexual for 14 years, and also convinced me that I was physiologically incapable of orgasm.

When I finally started to feel an interest in sex again I was concerned about being unable to respond, just due to my history plus the statistical likelihood that I had chosen another man who was not particularly giving in bed.

I began to take one of those herbal formulations that are marketed to help with sexual arousal. The particular one is not available anymore but I suspect they are all much of a muchness. I had thought I enjoyed sex, but began to experience levels of arousal I hadn't considered possible. Still no orgasm.

By this time the new partner was no longer in the picture but I was going to have an orgasm before I died if it killed me, and I had taken this on as a project.

A little research revealed that lecithin and Vit B5 contained the presursors to chemicals required to produce the orgasm chemicals and after 2 days of taking those I had what I thought might possibly have been an orgasm.

I kept experimenting and the effect built. I had about a year of having my head blown off, masturbating more than a teenage boy. Eventually, I calmed down and stopped taking the supplements and I find I orgasm without difficulty but without the intensity I had with chemical help.

Would I have orgasmed naturally if I had had a skilled and considerate partner initially? Perhaps, but I am convinced that overloading my body with the precursors was the only thing that got me over the mental block of my prior experiences.

Hope some of this helps you.