Lord Steve's good times fun thread

[Lord_Steve]

Ladies, please, there's plenty of Steve to go around thanks to my truly abberant obesity. Come frolick between my fetid folds!

(I am reduced to posting from my phone, stay put until I find a proper computer. That's an order, except to dge, in whose case it is a friendly request.)

 

[Etoile]

Oh my god, he said aberrant. *swoons*

 

[Lord_Steve]

I would love to sit in the corner and chit-chat with you, but.....

can I reserve the middle table for my topless dancing show first please?

I would be insulted if you didn't!

Just remember ladies...I was his first!!

never 4get patriot eagle oorah! That's a big roger on operation Thunder-Alpha-Etoile-Love, Seal Team 6 is inbound to your location to sex you up but good, over.

Didn't I see you sitting behind a wooden stand in the snow, with a sign that says "Healthy dollops of mad love and mayhem- 5 cents?"

weren't you the kid I saw tying down ladies with his favorite blankie and forcibly teaching them the true meaning of christmas?

I've been standing behind this red velvet rope shedding skins like a snake. But the big one-eyed bouncer just keeps looking past me at those young girls all decked out for sacrifice.

New Bdsm Craze: Hot and Horny Bro-Doms Force Naughty She-Snakes to Shed Skin, Make Belts From Skin, Then Whip With Own She-Snake-Skin-Belts. Life is Amazing For These Bulging Boys and Serpentine Subs.

 

[StrayKat]

Ladies, please, there's plenty of Steve to go around thanks to my truly abberant obesity.

You should invite more men here. As a distraction.
Just so you dont risk being ripped apart

 

[Jaded_One]

Didn't I see you sitting behind a wooden stand in the snow, with a sign that says "Healthy dollops of mad love and mayhem- 5 cents?"

I thought he was behind the one with the "Swift Kick in the Butt $1" cause everyone needs what he's selling

 

[satindesire]

I heard you were giving out free hugs and stopped by for my share.

 

[Kurokami]

New Bdsm Craze: Hot and Horny Bro-Doms Force Naughty She-Snakes to Shed Skin, Make Belts From Skin, Then Whip With Own She-Snake-Skin-Belts. Life is Amazing For These Bulging Boys and Serpentine Subs.

Ooh, I wish I had come to this thread earlier. Y'know, it'd be pretty easy to make a nice living off of this new craze: on one side, you could produce a truly unique variety of porn, and on the other, you could sell belts

You should invite more men here. As a distraction.

*Raises hand, sighing*

I guess I'll have to step up, then

 

[Lord_Steve]

I heard you were giving out free hugs and stopped by for my share.

gurl i have been practicing occult rituals at midnight and ladling the blood of lambs over various and several blasphemous stones just so the nightlords of terror and deceit will grant me multiple skittering and chitinous arms just so i can hug you better.

 

[eastern sun]

skin offering for the aberrant belt

 

[Lord_Steve]

skin offering for the aberrant belt

Big Beautiful Serpent Princess has Lots of Skin to Love

 

[satindesire]

gurl i have been practicing occult rituals at midnight and ladling the blood of lambs over various and several blasphemous stones just so the nightlords of terror and deceit will grant me multiple skittering and chitinous arms just so i can hug you better.

You have no idea how horny that just made me.

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

weren't you the kid I saw tying down ladies with his favorite blankie and forcibly teaching them the true meaning of christmas?

All I want is what I have coming to me. All I want is my fair share.

I thought he was behind the one with the "Swift Kick in the Butt $1" cause everyone needs what he's selling

$1? Damn. Prices are surging, on Wall Street concerns about supplies of butt-kickage units.

 

[Lord_Steve]

You have no idea how horny that just made me.

let's all just pretend I have too much dignity to make a joke about "insex"

or something something "sex insects in sects"

 

[Lord_Steve]

PARTY GAME: pick one celebrity and the one bdsm act you would most like to perform on them/have them perform on you BUT your answer must include as many puns as you are humanly capable of GO

 

[StrayKat]

let's all just pretend I have too much dignity to make a joke about "insex"

Bah I have no wish to pretend anything.
And my dignity goes well down as my excitement goes up. Its fun, try it

 

[Lord_Steve]

And my dignity goes well down as my excitement goes up.

this is also true of dogs, small children, and anybody who gets close to robert downey junior

 

[StrayKat]

this is also true of dogs, small children, and anybody who gets close to robert downey junior

Is it now?
Well you can call me bitch.
Wont be the first one either.

 

[Lord_Steve]

Is it now?
Well you can call me bitch.
Wont be the first one either.

i swear to god if you pee on the- BAD SUB! oh christ, i've got to stop leaving my clothes on the floor

 

[StrayKat]

Do you need an animal trainer by any chance?

 

[Curious_in_Cali]

PARTY GAME: pick one celebrity and the one bdsm act you would most like to perform on them/have them perform on you BUT your answer must include as many puns as you are humanly capable of GO

Snow maybe its selfish and coaled to hope for such a thing from such a warm soul, but I wish to be laid down over Santa's lap and present my elf to rectumfy this years knot e-ways. For as cookie as it may seem, I really would bake the best of it, milk it for all its worth. Gosh, Lord Steve, do you think if I was really good, will he... candy cane me? What if I nicely say Peace?

 

[Etoile]

That was awesome. I'm just not a punny person.

 

[Lord_Steve]

Snow maybe its selfish and coaled to hope for such a thing from such a warm soul, but I wish to be laid down over Santa's lap and present my elf to rectumfy this years knot e-ways. For as cookie as it may seem, I really would bake the best of it, milk it for all its worth. Gosh, Lord Steve, do you think if I was really good, will he... candy cane me? What if I nicely say Peace?

holy shit

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

Snow maybe its selfish and coaled to hope for such a thing from such a warm soul, but I wish to be laid down over Santa's lap and present my elf to rectumfy this years knot e-ways. For as cookie as it may seem, I really would bake the best of it, milk it for all its worth. Gosh, Lord Steve, do you think if I was really good, will he... candy cane me? What if I nicely say Peace?

If you ass nicely, I think Santa will come ply. He has a staff at the pole to ass ist, too, I relieve, butt I'm not Sirtain. Re. member: be sure to to writhe a spank you note, and handprint it in red on a cheek of pain stationery. Santa licks that kind of sting.

 

[Lord_Steve]

If you ass nicely, I think Santa will come ply. He has a staff at the pole to ass ist, too, I relieve, butt I'm not Sirtain. Re. member: be sure to to writhe a spank you note, and handprint it in red on a cheek of pain stationery. Santa licks that kind of sting.

haha this is barely intelligible and i love it so much