jussforfun
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FinnMacCool said:
Martha's Jailhouse Jellies
Martha Stewart's New Book Titles
- Thread starter jussforfun
- Start date
Martha's Jailhouse Jellies
done_got_old
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eating her cellmate........
It's a good thing!
It's a good thing!
jussforfun
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done_got_old said:
How to make dildos out of soap!
jussforfun
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jussforfun said:
8 x 10's and how to make them feel like a mansion
I got no game
Experienced
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How to properly toss your cellmate's salad.
jussforfun
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I got no game said:
101 uses for Flannel
alwaysawake
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Wallpapering Your Cell Using Worthless Junk Bonds And Creativity...
Here's what Martha did during the holidays this year...her schedule should be less hectic in 2004!
December 1 - Blanch carcass from Thanksgiving turkey. Spray paint gold, turn upside down and use as a sleigh to hold Christmas Cards.
December 2 - Have Mormon Tabernacle Choir record outgoing Christmas message for answering machine.
December 3 - Using candlewick and hand gilded miniature pinecones, fashion cat-o-nine-tails. Flog Gardener.
December 4 - Repaint Sistine Chapel ceiling in ecru, with mocha trim.
December 5 - Get new eyeglasses. Grind lenses myself.
December 6 - Fax family Christmas newsletter to Pulitzer Committee for consideration.
December 7 - Debug Windows 2000
December 10 - Align carpets to adjust for curvature of Earth.
December 11 - Lay Faberge egg.
December 12 - Take Dog apart. Disinfect. Reassemble.
December 13 - Collect Dentures. They make excellent pastry cutters, particularly for decorative pie crusts.
December 14 - Install plumbing in gingerbread house.
December 15 - Replace air in mini-van tires with Glade "holiday scents" in case tires are shot out at mall.
December 17 - Child-proof the Christmas tree with garland of razor wire.
December 19 - Adjust legs of chairs so each Christmas dinner guest will be same height when sitting at his or her assigned seat.
December 20 - Dip sheep and cows in egg whites and roll in confectioner's sugar to add a festive sparkle to the pasture.
December 21 - Drain city reservoir; refill with mulled cider, orange slices and cinnamon sticks.
December 22 - Float votive candles in toilet tank.
December 23 - Seed clouds for white Christmas.
December 24 - Do my annual good deed. Go to several stores. Be seen engaged in last minute Christmas shopping, thus making many people feel less inadequate than they really are.
December 25 - Bear son. Swaddle. Lay in color-coordinated manger scented with homemade potpourri.
December 26 - Organize spice racks by genus and phylum.
December 27 - Build snowman in exact likeness of Jesus.
December 31 - New Year's Eve! Give staff their resolutions. Call a friend in each time zone of the world as the clock strikes midnight in that country.
Here's what Martha did during the holidays this year...her schedule should be less hectic in 2004!
December 1 - Blanch carcass from Thanksgiving turkey. Spray paint gold, turn upside down and use as a sleigh to hold Christmas Cards.
December 2 - Have Mormon Tabernacle Choir record outgoing Christmas message for answering machine.
December 3 - Using candlewick and hand gilded miniature pinecones, fashion cat-o-nine-tails. Flog Gardener.
December 4 - Repaint Sistine Chapel ceiling in ecru, with mocha trim.
December 5 - Get new eyeglasses. Grind lenses myself.
December 6 - Fax family Christmas newsletter to Pulitzer Committee for consideration.
December 7 - Debug Windows 2000
December 10 - Align carpets to adjust for curvature of Earth.
December 11 - Lay Faberge egg.
December 12 - Take Dog apart. Disinfect. Reassemble.
December 13 - Collect Dentures. They make excellent pastry cutters, particularly for decorative pie crusts.
December 14 - Install plumbing in gingerbread house.
December 15 - Replace air in mini-van tires with Glade "holiday scents" in case tires are shot out at mall.
December 17 - Child-proof the Christmas tree with garland of razor wire.
December 19 - Adjust legs of chairs so each Christmas dinner guest will be same height when sitting at his or her assigned seat.
December 20 - Dip sheep and cows in egg whites and roll in confectioner's sugar to add a festive sparkle to the pasture.
December 21 - Drain city reservoir; refill with mulled cider, orange slices and cinnamon sticks.
December 22 - Float votive candles in toilet tank.
December 23 - Seed clouds for white Christmas.
December 24 - Do my annual good deed. Go to several stores. Be seen engaged in last minute Christmas shopping, thus making many people feel less inadequate than they really are.
December 25 - Bear son. Swaddle. Lay in color-coordinated manger scented with homemade potpourri.
December 26 - Organize spice racks by genus and phylum.
December 27 - Build snowman in exact likeness of Jesus.
December 31 - New Year's Eve! Give staff their resolutions. Call a friend in each time zone of the world as the clock strikes midnight in that country.
Bug Eyed Monster
1Sexy's Bug
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Now available
Now available at K-Mart:
Martha Stewart brand soap on a roap.
It costs twice as much and works half as well, but you'll buy it anyways.
Now available at K-Mart:
Martha Stewart brand soap on a roap.
It costs twice as much and works half as well, but you'll buy it anyways.
jussforfun
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Re: Now available
HOW TO MAKE YOUR CAKE RISE....... even when it conceals a file!
Bug Eyed Monster said:
HOW TO MAKE YOUR CAKE RISE....... even when it conceals a file!
jussforfun
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1sexylady said:Martha Stewart's ideas on decorating this **Small** space..
Whaddayamean I'm a Stuck Up Bitch?...... questions for a jury!
redrider4u
This pix is for you......
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"someday I be fwee."
Joey3308
Let's Monkey Around
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jussforfun
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Joey3308 said:
What not to say to Federal Prosecutors!!!
jussforfun
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jussforfun said:
alwaysawake
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How To Make License Plates From Used Soup Cans
This site takes a minute to load, but it has a hysterical 'musical Martha in jail' joke...
http://www.yourbigfun.com/giggles/martha/index.cfm
This site takes a minute to load, but it has a hysterical 'musical Martha in jail' joke...
http://www.yourbigfun.com/giggles/martha/index.cfm
