Non-traditional Relationships

[assister49]

What experiences have you had in so-called "non-traditional relationships"? Here I am referring to M-F but with caviots such as stay-at-home-husbands, significant age differences, mixed-race, different religious beliefs, cultural differences, etc. Anything that society percieves as out of the "norm."

For instance, something as simple as a height or weight difference can throw people for a loop and give them the impression that you "don't belong together". Adopting children of a different race can also be perceived in the negative by some (narrow-minded) people - this is probably a whole different subject.

Perhaps "non-traditional" is not the best descriptive term, but my point is just to see how people work through the added difficulties of maintaining a relationship when presented with opposition from others. Most times this opposition is never spoken, but hangs in the air. Or is it from our own upbringing that we perceive a difficulty? Although the USA had become more accepting of differences, we still have a LONG way to go.

 

[me700]

um, well i've never dated anyone except my current BF, and our major difference is height i guess. He's 6ft 6 and i'm 5ft 7.
But we've never recieved any animosity except for annoying girls who ask "so, how big is your penis?"

 

[Zergplex]

Zergplex Says

Quite a noticable height differance between myself and my darling, I am quite a bit shorter then her. People are relativly accepting up here though so the most we got was a bit of teasing from our friends (or an occassional comment the first time someone sees us together)

-Zergplex

 

[Noor]

Most men are taller than me as the national average is taller and for some reason I attract guys even taller than that. I have also been involved with guys shorter than me.

I am plus size, I don't care what my men are as long as they fit.

I am the product of a mixed marriage-religions and cultures.

I have always wanted my children to be darker than me. If I adopt I will adopt most likely from asia.

I tend to be in non-monogamous relationships, I don't really know or care if the outside world is upset by that.

Opposition from others is their problem, not mine. If they don't like what they see, they can look somewhere else. It is none of their business what my relationships are or who they are with and I will tell them so.
Often reminding people that "it ain't the meat, its the motion" quiets them fast.

Occasionally, I have had to remind people that white anglo saxon men are a minority in this world and they need to just get over it.

 

[Jezebelle1458]

*stands up and applauds Noor* You go girl! I always said that if someone has a problem with me...well, it was their problem,not mine.

 

[cichli]

There are very few black-white biracial people in the US, so I figure that just about any relationship I get into will be a mixed race relationship.

I'm dating a lovely little woman who happens to be white and for the most part it doesn't bother us. It's not that we're completely without concerns, though. I sometimes worry about how people view our relationship, especially her parents. She's from a very plain white-bread midwestern family in a very plain white-bread midwestern town, and so her upbringing has been significantly less diverse than mine. It's not a bad thing, but I feel a little alienated sometimes, especially when we visit her hometown. I guess her friends are a little surprised to see her with someone who doesn't fit the mold of their expectations, but nothing bad has come of it.

The race issue is minor though. We've been together for almost a year now, and things are going pretty well. Love that woman.

Another thing that I think about is future progeny. Unless I impregnate another mulatto person like myself, I'm bound to have multi-racial children. Mixed-race people tend to be hot, though, so I'm sure my kids won't have to worry too much.

 

[LLs Man]

LL & I fall into the non-traditional bracket I guess, since I'm 46 & she's 27. Some people give us strange looks, but it doesn't bother us, & even my very conservative Christian parents are comfortable with it.

 

[It'sasecret]

I hope this does sound racist, b/c no harm is meant by it at all. I find mixed race people to be very attractive.

 

[Missingmeds]

*stands up and applauds Noor* You go girl! I always said that if someone has a problem with me...well, it was their problem,not mine.

Count me in your club Jezebelle.

 

[ReadyOne]

My wife is a good 6" taller.

The geometry problem can really bother me at times. There's something about being able to pick someone up and throw them on the bed, bend over to kiss, spoon from behind, and just wrap them inside you.

OTOH, when people get a first sight of us, they don't associate us as a couple.

This has avoided a couple of "shame, shame, you are living together in sin" problems from a few conservatives we've had to deal with.

But being asked what my "mother" wants (she's 3 years younger) is very embaressing for her.

 

[Zergplex]

Zergplex Says

My wife is a good 6" taller.

The geometry problem can really bother me at times. There's something about being able to pick someone up and throw them on the bed, bend over to kiss, spoon from behind, and just wrap them inside you.

OTOH, when people get a first sight of us, they don't associate us as a couple.

This has avoided a couple of "shame, shame, you are living together in sin" problems from a few conservatives we've had to deal with.

But being asked what my "mother" wants (she's 3 years younger) is very embaressing for her.

The geometry problems you mentioned are what I really enjoy. I'm the more cuddly, clingy person in the relationship so I like being held and being spooned (and being tossed onto the bed ^_~). Then again I tend to bend the gender stereotypes as much as possible.

-Zergplex

 

[Crimson]

my current bf is very hot and philipino - we've been together 3 1/2 years now. even when he lived abroad, he mostly went to international schools and dated white girls, so i think his family gave up the dream of him having an asian girlfriend a long time ago. i actually get along with them very well now. my mother slyly tried to ask where he was "from" the first time she met him in person (i purposefully didn't tell her he wasn't white). my smart ass reply: "new york". i wasn't going to let her off that easily...

other people really don't care since we live in such a liberal place. initially, a few of my friends teased me about size (following the myth that all asian men have small packages). i always replied that he was certainly big enough to get the job done and had quite a wicked mouth on him to boot....

my very first boyfriend was jewish, which was pretty accepted by both our families (mine's catholic, tho i'm not anymore). i was fairly young at the time (16) and my mother was worried that i was spending so much time at his house, probably doing things i shouldn't be doing (which of course i was). the way she broached the topic, however, made me so mad: "we know his parents don't share our values." i shot back: "they're jewish, not satanists!"



crimson

 

[sxylegs]

There are very few black-white biracial people in the US, so I figure that just about any relationship I get into will be a mixed race relationship.

I'm dating a lovely little woman who happens to be white and for the most part it doesn't bother us. It's not that we're completely without concerns, though. I sometimes worry about how people view our relationship, especially her parents. She's from a very plain white-bread midwestern family in a very plain white-bread midwestern town, and so her upbringing has been significantly less diverse than mine. It's not a bad thing, but I feel a little alienated sometimes, especially when we visit her hometown. I guess her friends are a little surprised to see her with someone who doesn't fit the mold of their expectations, but nothing bad has come of it.

The race issue is minor though. We've been together for almost a year now, and things are going pretty well. Love that woman.

Another thing that I think about is future progeny. Unless I impregnate another mulatto person like myself, I'm bound to have multi-racial children. Mixed-race people tend to be hot, though, so I'm sure my kids won't have to worry too much.

Wow......all the bi-racial couples must be here in Indianapolis. I see more bi-racial couples than just white on white or black on black......doenst bother me...
My late husband was 20 years older than me and we got a lot of looks,,,,,most thought he was my father.
My present boyfriend is 11 years younger. We dont get many looks because i dont look my age. Wouldnt matter anyway....

Dare to be different.....If different is right for you!!!!

 

[zhukov1943]

One of my former girlfriends was bi-sexual, and she'd been exclusively in lesbian relationships up until me.

Her lesbian friends didn't like me and my penis being around one bit! Although I must admit that sometimes I played the "manly man" just to piss them off!

It was really, really strange...

 

[xDonkeyxPunchx]

My SO lives in a diff state than me, and i get the occasional your crazy comment, but i honestly dont care. I love her more than anything.