One-liners. Okay--two, tops.

[voyeuresse]

why did the punk rocker cross the road?

because he had a chicken safety pinned to his face.

 

[hugo_sam]

why did the punk rocker cross the road?

because he had a chicken safety pinned to his face.

Why did the chicken cross the road?
To prove to the armidillo it could be done!

 

[dr_mabeuse]

Donald Rumsfeld was giving President Bush his daily briefing. As he was diving the daily tallies from Iraq he finished with:

"And today there were four Brazilian Soldiers KIlled."

"Oh my God that's terrible news" President Bush wailed.

His staff stood there mystified as he sat there mourning, his head in his hands. Finally he sat up and rubbing his eyes asked:

"How many is in a Brazilian?"

Cat

~ ~

 

[hugo_sam]

Lost in Translation and culture

I realize the armidillo thing is probably lost on most of the GB'ers out there. Deep South and South Central US thing.

Sorry!

Hugo

 

[thebullet]

Hugo- don't worry, us dumb Northerns understand road kill.
I thougth it was funny.

 

[hugo_sam]

Hugo- don't worry, us dumb Northerns understand road kill.
I thougth it was funny.

You'll never hear 'dumb Northerner' come out of my mouth. Maybe 'Damn Yankee' but you live too close to God's country for me to find fault. I'm stuck down here in Redneck Hell.

Hugo

 

[SeaCat]

I realize the armidillo thing is probably lost on most of the GB'ers out there. Deep South and South Central US thing.

Sorry!

Hugo

Snicker

RedNeck Bowling Ball.
Possum on the Half Shell?

Got a couple of them in my back yard from time to time.

Cat

P.S. They are the only mammal other than man that carries and incubates the virus for Hansons Disease. (Leprosy)

 

[cloudy]

You'll never hear 'dumb Northerner' come out of my mouth. Maybe 'Damn Yankee' but you live too close to God's country for me to find fault. I'm stuck down here in Redneck Hell.

Hugo

I thought I was in redneck hell.

 

[hugo_sam]

I thought I was in redneck hell.

If eastern middle Alabama isn't redneck hell then it does not exist. I haven't met a dozen locals that could spell redneck and the only way they can spell their brand of truck is to look at where it's written on the truck.

Hugo

 

[BlackShanglan]

I thought I was in redneck hell.

Plenty of room there for all God's creatures ...

 

[SeaCat]

*Snicker*

What do you you call southern Florida then?

Cat

 

[hugo_sam]

*Snicker*

What do you you call southern Florida then?

Cat

A lot closer to the beach!

Hugo

 

[SeaCat]

A lot closer to the beach!

Hugo

ROTFLMAO
I almost blew suds on the monitor. (Ever hear where the term cracker comes from?)

I am from the original rednecks. My neck is red because I work my ass off. Those who come behind me are wimps, wussies, and assholes who don't know what it is like to have to work for a living.

Cat

(No you can't insult me by calling me a redneck, but you can insult me by including the piss ants who have never worked for a living under that title.)

 

[hugo_sam]

ROTFLMAO
I almost blew suds on the monitor. (Ever hear where the term cracker comes from?)

I am from the original rednecks. My neck is red because I work my ass off. Those who come behind me are wimps, wussies, and assholes who don't know what it is like to have to work for a living.

Cat

(No you can't insult me by calling me a redneck, but you can insult me by including the piss ants who have never worked for a living under that title.)

I agree about those that came after. I'm not usually so negative, sorry. I should amend to uneducated, unwashed masses by choice. I grew up in the South, yes I know about cracker and many less kind. You clearly can read and write so were not included in earlier misguided diatribe.

Hugo

 

[togitc]

Roadkill is how I found out this area had raccoons.

Now back to the subject:


A chicken and an egg are lying in bed, the chicken turns to the egg and snaps
"I guess that answers that question."

 

[AppleBiter]

A sadist and a masochist who have never had sex get married. On their wedding night, the masochist lays on the bed and says, "Beat me! Beat me!"

The sadist lights a cigarette, takes a drag, and says, "Nope."

 

[Midnite Toker]

Department of Redundancy Department

 

[hugo_sam]

Department of Redundancy Department

So you're the department responsible for:

ATM Machine = Automatic Teller Machine Machine
PIN Number = Personal Identification Number Number

Hugo

 

[BlackShanglan]

So you're the department responsible for:

ATM Machine = Automatic Teller Machine Machine
PIN Number = Personal Identification Number Number

Hugo

How ... did I never notice that before?

Now it's going to drive me crazy.

 

[voyeuresse]

Hugo- don't worry, us dumb Northerns understand road kill.
I thougth it was funny.

yes im sure youve all heard of The Original Roadkill Cookbook by Buck Peterson

 

[hugo_sam]

yes im sure youve all heard of The Original Roadkill Cookbook by Buck Peterson

Or was the Buck N Road

or Smas D Flatt?

Hugo

 

[logophile]

How ... did I never notice that before?

Now it's going to drive me crazy.

Yes, those both drive me crazy too.
Seriously.

 

[cantdog]

I've seen Pie a la Mode with Ice Cream on a menu.