~Post baseless lies about the person above you - V.6~

[FotherMucker19]

Arrested for simulated fellatio with an Elmo doll at Target.

Also banned from all Target stores.

 

[AlexBailey]

Arrested for simulated fellatio with an Elmo doll at Target.

Also banned from all Target stores.

He always pronounces Target as “Tahr-zhay” so it sounds more fancy. He shops there at least once a week always hoping they have a new pastel color of beret.

 

[Cindy027]

Lives for the day when he can dress in a bear skin cloak and play the bongo drums for the Bongo Boys Band.

 

[mickyp123]

She thought Fifty Shades of Grey was a paint colour chart

Bet she carries Dulux with her in case she gets emulsional.

 

[~Elizabeth~]

Shot at for burning down the local village because they had no virgins left for him.

 

[PicassosPleasure]

Shot at for burning down the local village because they had no virgins left for him.

Thinks the earth spins around her axis, but forgets it takes two poles to make an axis.

 

[~Elizabeth~]

Flogged a poor, innocent kitty last night.

 

[mickyp123]

Flogged a poor, innocent kitty last night.

Tried to convince people that such a thing as an innocent little kitty exists

 

[Biggalute]

Tried to convince people that such a thing as an innocent little kitty exists

Once got fire-d because of his bad breath

 

[AlexBailey]

He’ll accept either a pint or a peck to grace you with a peek of his package.

 

[Biggalute]

He recently got bejazzled

 

[PicassosPleasure]

His ma, mam, mum or máthair still sings him lullabies at night.

 

[Cindy027]

Likes to visit the casinos and stare intently at the roulette wheels believing he can manipulate them using his mind.

 

[PicassosPleasure]

Likes to visit the casinos and stare intently at the roulette wheels believing he can manipulate them using his mind.

Discovered that while stalking cocktail waitresses in their sexy uniforms.

 

[Cindy027]

Likes to park in secluded forest reserves and shout at the birds.

 

[Biggalute]

Has a 1980's Jane Fonda leotard that she saves for 'special occasions'

 

[melimelissa]

Your lost sock didn't vanish: it was so traumatised by being washed in cold water, it had to attend a sock party to debate string theory, and sip cotton coffee until feeling slightly mismatched, it returned bearing this cryptic message: “Existential crisis, please mend."

 

[Cindy027]

Thinks her bedroom is the answer to chaos theory.

 

[Biggalute]

Draws a blank whenever she picks up a pencil and paper

 

[Wand3rlust]

Yearns for the days of chalk and slate.

 

[Series 6]

Yearns for the days of chalk and slate.

Went streaking in old Wembley stadium before it was torn down. Now wants to take a run through the new one.

 

[Biggalute]

He's more of Lada than a BMW

 

[Series 6]

He's more of Lada than a BMW

Is frustrated that he has never won a game of Mine Sweeper on his computer.

 

[Bambear99]

Puts ketchup on hotdogs

 

[Wand3rlust]

Puts sauerkraut on bratwurst