Real life reflected in your writing
- Thread starter MaudeBlack
- Start date
OddLove
Aimless Wanderer
- Joined
- Jun 2, 2021
- Posts
- 538
My stories are completely fictional, but my own experiences will inevitably influence what I write.
The most 'Me' thing about the stories is the awkwardness around intimacy. I literally can't do vanilla sex intimacy. Without some kind of 'play' whether it be a dynamic or kink, I find sex unappealing and awkward. And that's definitely bled into all my stories. There's also awkward shame around penis size in most my stories because that's someone I struggled with in my teens and twenties.
But 'myself' is in just about ever main character to some degree. I'm not sure it's possibly to not put ourselves into our work.
The most 'Me' thing about the stories is the awkwardness around intimacy. I literally can't do vanilla sex intimacy. Without some kind of 'play' whether it be a dynamic or kink, I find sex unappealing and awkward. And that's definitely bled into all my stories. There's also awkward shame around penis size in most my stories because that's someone I struggled with in my teens and twenties.
But 'myself' is in just about ever main character to some degree. I'm not sure it's possibly to not put ourselves into our work.
Stanfield2025
Virgin
- Joined
- Oct 15, 2025
- Posts
- 300
I didn't always write erotica. I wrote sci-fi fanfic before this. Many years ago I lost a group of friends. Part of it was my fault, but it was an experience that affected me for a while after. Don't worry, this is relevant.
In one of the sci-fi stories I wrote, the main character lost her group of friends and as a result, joins a vigilante terrorist group. When I wrote this character, I consciously put in my experience. And while I never in the story have the narration state that this character secretly wants to replace her long-lost friends, at least one reader was able to put those pieces together and they commented about it.
Writing that story helped me get right with the irl version of that experience.
In one of the sci-fi stories I wrote, the main character lost her group of friends and as a result, joins a vigilante terrorist group. When I wrote this character, I consciously put in my experience. And while I never in the story have the narration state that this character secretly wants to replace her long-lost friends, at least one reader was able to put those pieces together and they commented about it.
Writing that story helped me get right with the irl version of that experience.
TruthwithaTwist
Experienced
- Joined
- Oct 18, 2020
- Posts
- 91
Everything I write is based in truth. Real stories, real people, real locations - with things changed slightly to protect those involved. I do spice things up a bit hence the "with a twist" in my author name.
I also went through some medical issues a few years back (best wishes on recovery) and I found it VERY difficult to write during that time. My logical brain said, "You are stuck in bed, why not write?" but my physical condition said otherwise. I just couldn't drum up sexy tales while I was injured and not 100%.
In general, I do think my work is affected by whatever is happening in my current life. Often, I will have not have thought of a relationship or encounter in years, then something sparks the memory. I'll make a note of it and then use that memory for a story (bonus if I can tie it into a contest!)
I also went through some medical issues a few years back (best wishes on recovery) and I found it VERY difficult to write during that time. My logical brain said, "You are stuck in bed, why not write?" but my physical condition said otherwise. I just couldn't drum up sexy tales while I was injured and not 100%.
In general, I do think my work is affected by whatever is happening in my current life. Often, I will have not have thought of a relationship or encounter in years, then something sparks the memory. I'll make a note of it and then use that memory for a story (bonus if I can tie it into a contest!)
bobbyfitz
Newbie
- Joined
- Oct 4, 2023
- Posts
- 22
MaudeBlack:
For the past month or so I've been quite ureal-life ended up having a bit of a stay in my local hospital. I'm on the mend now but still a long way to go before I'll be back to my old self.
I've been reflecting on my writing during this period and have realised that being poorly has coloured my work in quite an interesting way.
During my hospital stay I was probed, prodded and processed and felt little more than a body for medical staff to assess (That's there job, no slight on them. God love the NHS).
I've written several stories where women lose their identity. One into servitude. One to physical and mental bimbofication and another to her sexual appetite being increased beyond her control.
I don't think it's an unfair leap to suggest I'm struggling with feelings of anonymity, loss of desire and identity.
I've also written a story about a horrible guy who is becomes a sissy. Perhaps me trying to reflect an element of femininity onto an otherwise bleak situation?
I also wrote a cuck story and posted it on Loving Wives, knowing full well it would be 1-star bombed and cause the natives to loose their shit at me - perhaps I was seeking a pain distraction?
I am currently working on a personal story about my first time experience with anal sex. It also includes a lot of my thoughts on control and submission. It's the most explicit and honest thing I've written about myself.
Dare I say it, I'm actually quite proud of how it's coming together and is unapologetically me. Perhaps the probing has made me more open (pun intended) to sharing intimate details?
I'm not really sure if there is a point to this post...perhaps I just wanted to acknowledge it for myself, that what's happening in my real life affects my writing. Which, as a very new writer is probably quite an important realisation to make.
Have you noticed you work being affected by your real life? If there are certain themes you cover at certain times or reach a mile stone or significant life event and in shapes a piece you are working on?
Just curious, I guess.
Look after your health.
Xx
The story that I'm currently working on is based on a real life couple. I've made one or two slight changes. To the characters and their careers. Mainly because how modern technology has shaped our lives. What with dating sites, social media and instant messaging. But I've kept it as close as I can to tell their story.
For the past month or so I've been quite ureal-life ended up having a bit of a stay in my local hospital. I'm on the mend now but still a long way to go before I'll be back to my old self.
I've been reflecting on my writing during this period and have realised that being poorly has coloured my work in quite an interesting way.
During my hospital stay I was probed, prodded and processed and felt little more than a body for medical staff to assess (That's there job, no slight on them. God love the NHS).
I've written several stories where women lose their identity. One into servitude. One to physical and mental bimbofication and another to her sexual appetite being increased beyond her control.
I don't think it's an unfair leap to suggest I'm struggling with feelings of anonymity, loss of desire and identity.
I've also written a story about a horrible guy who is becomes a sissy. Perhaps me trying to reflect an element of femininity onto an otherwise bleak situation?
I also wrote a cuck story and posted it on Loving Wives, knowing full well it would be 1-star bombed and cause the natives to loose their shit at me - perhaps I was seeking a pain distraction?
I am currently working on a personal story about my first time experience with anal sex. It also includes a lot of my thoughts on control and submission. It's the most explicit and honest thing I've written about myself.
Dare I say it, I'm actually quite proud of how it's coming together and is unapologetically me. Perhaps the probing has made me more open (pun intended) to sharing intimate details?
I'm not really sure if there is a point to this post...perhaps I just wanted to acknowledge it for myself, that what's happening in my real life affects my writing. Which, as a very new writer is probably quite an important realisation to make.
Have you noticed you work being affected by your real life? If there are certain themes you cover at certain times or reach a mile stone or significant life event and in shapes a piece you are working on?
Just curious, I guess.
Look after your health.
Xx
The story that I'm currently working on is based on a real life couple. I've made one or two slight changes. To the characters and their careers. Mainly because how modern technology has shaped our lives. What with dating sites, social media and instant messaging. But I've kept it as close as I can to tell their story.
Similar threads
