Tell Blatant Lies About....Yourself

[LaisDeMarieDeFrance]

I'm a fucking delight.

pssst... it's supposed to be a lie, not the absolute truth!

 

[SusanHoward]

I almost always wear panties in dance competitions.

 

[Sexydrana]

I hate the toy, it doesn’t get me to cum

 

[EctoJohn]

Everything's going just fine.

 

[Chloe_Harper]

I find coffee to be icky, blech. Can't understand people who drink it every single day

 

[PotNoodle79]

I'm irresistible to women

 

[EctoJohn]

I have the mutant power to summon cranky pigeons at will.

 

[Ratchetman1982]

Being called sexy as much I am, gets old

 

[Sexydrana]

I’m only witty when the moon is at a certain degree and if you’re wondering which degree that is, that’s between me and the moon

 

[JustAnotherFlower]

I'm the life of the party.. a brilliant, little ball of sunshine.

 

[Sexydrana]

I’m so witty Tina Fey gets her material from me.

 

[F3x0r]

I'm going to be a fucking rainbow of joy when I wake up in 4 hours

 

[Bloodandglitter]

I'm not smitten with someone on here

 

[Ratchetman1982]

Ive never even heard of a Kosmoceratops

 

[EctoJohn]

I used to know the Muffin Man.

 

[MidwestPrincess23]

I had sex with the Muffin Man

 

[Sexydrana]

My first time and one night stand was the muffin man…

 

[EctoJohn]

She is actually a secret agent on a mission to lure in unsuspecting me.

 

[PotNoodle79]

I’m bright eyed and bushy tailed this morning

 

[Abeona1]

I'm really looking forward to going to work today.

Anyone see a theme here.
I really love working with my colleagues.

 

[Sunlover102]

I really excited cos Monday is just a couple of days away.

 

[Slickflboy07]

I had sex with the Muffin Man

Does he live on Dury Lane?

 

[Wand3rlust]

I hate being naked.

 

[ALovelyNudist]

I’ve never been in handcuffs

 

[jeff_is_smiling]

I've never gone down on a woman...on a picnic table...at the city park...at night...until she came...twice...