The Bears Den
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MaryBears
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Morning all
Yes it is alot better than surgery...beside it is going to be physical therepy in the heated therapy pool....i know what that is like cause they have had me there before....
CatEyes said:Well that's great to hear Mary! Physical therapy is much better than surgery. Looks like you'll be on your way to feeling better soon.
Yes it is alot better than surgery...beside it is going to be physical therepy in the heated therapy pool....i know what that is like cause they have had me there before....
Sioux City Male
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MaryBears said:Good evening Sioux City Male.....Nice to meet you and i hope you stop in and check out the thread.....Feel free to leave messages, jokes or pics...
Thank you MaryBears. I like what I have seen so far. Lie still was hillarious.
So, what happened to your knee? Maybe I can massage it for you. Massage works well with physical therapy.
Sioux City Male
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MaryBears said:I sprained it exercising in a swim areobics class about 6 to 8 weeks ago.....I have Rheumatoid arthritis and fibromyalgia also so that don't have the problem
wow, sorry to hear all that's going on with you hun, and being so young. I'm sure you don't want any pitty, sorry about that.
Anyway, in reading your first post, you were on the general board posting pics? Sorry, bad choice. You will be very happy here on the playground. I would say about 95-98 % of the people here are great. You will always run into a couple of people where ever you go, but here on the playground, you can pop into any thread and you will be very welcome.
I for you am glad you're here. Need to vent, use me if you like.
I will be posting a couple things here for you to laugh at. (hopefully they're funny)(LOL)Again, nice to meet you.
MaryBears
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Thanks hun......With all my health problems, depression being one, I have learned it is easier to have laughter in my life....So I hope you will post some funnies....Will make my daySioux City Male said:wow, sorry to hear all that's going on with you hun, and being so young. I'm sure you don't want any pitty, sorry about that.
Anyway, in reading your first post, you were on the general board posting pics? Sorry, bad choice. You will be very happy here on the playground. I would say about 95-98 % of the people here are great. You will always run into a couple of people where ever you go, but here on the playground, you can pop into any thread and you will be very welcome.
I for you am glad you're here. Need to vent, use me if you like.
I will be posting a couple things here for you to laugh at. (hopefully they're funny)(LOL)Again, nice to meet you.
Sioux City Male
Literotica Guru
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Things to Ponder...
>Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze
>these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"
>
>Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there. I'm gonna eat the
>next thing that comes outta it's butt."
>
>Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible
>crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
>
>Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
>
>If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
>
>Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
>
>If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why
>can't he fix a hole in a boat?
>
>Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
>
>Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
>
>Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both
>dogs!
>
>What do you call male ballerinas?
>
>Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??
>
>If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
>
>If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
>
>If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
>
>If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
>
>Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
>
>Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
>
>Stop singing and read on . . . . . . . . . .
>
>Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
>
>Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your ass?
>
>Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you,
>but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
>
>Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
>Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze
>these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"
>
>Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there. I'm gonna eat the
>next thing that comes outta it's butt."
>
>Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible
>crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
>
>Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
>
>If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
>
>Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
>
>If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why
>can't he fix a hole in a boat?
>
>Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
>
>Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
>
>Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both
>dogs!
>
>What do you call male ballerinas?
>
>Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??
>
>If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
>
>If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
>
>If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
>
>If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
>
>Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
>
>Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
>
>Stop singing and read on . . . . . . . . . .
>
>Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
>
>Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your ass?
>
>Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you,
>but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
>
>Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
MaryBears
Literotica Guru
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Re: Re: Your daddy's here!
Good Morning!!!! Hope everyone has a good day.....Here is a joke to start you off
A young boy had been taken for his first visit to a nudist camp by his parents. He was surprised at the different sizes of the male organs and mentioned it to his father. The father, being rather well endowed, explained that it was a measure of intelligence, the big ones being smart and the small ones being dumb.
That afternoon the father was looking for his wife and asked his son if he had seen his mother.
"I saw her about ten minutes ago, She was with a real dumb man, but he seemed to be getting smarter every minute."
Good Morning!!!! Hope everyone has a good day.....Here is a joke to start you off
A young boy had been taken for his first visit to a nudist camp by his parents. He was surprised at the different sizes of the male organs and mentioned it to his father. The father, being rather well endowed, explained that it was a measure of intelligence, the big ones being smart and the small ones being dumb.
That afternoon the father was looking for his wife and asked his son if he had seen his mother.
"I saw her about ten minutes ago, She was with a real dumb man, but he seemed to be getting smarter every minute."
FRENCHIE44T
Lover of oral sex
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- May 27, 2003
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Hi Sexy,
Loads of hugs to you and licks & kisses all over. That must make me one of the smart ones then. But its not the size that matters its how you pleasure with it. Am I right ? And I'd luv to give you lots of pleasure
Loads of hugs to you and licks & kisses all over. That must make me one of the smart ones then. But its not the size that matters its how you pleasure with it. Am I right ? And I'd luv to give you lots of pleasure
Jaybird3
Lustily burning for .....
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- Sep 5, 2003
- Posts
- 1,086
A very nice thread Mary, sorry to hear about the picture thread.
Frenchie, so nice to see you and you are very right.
But here is a chuckle for you all to read.
Retarded Grandparents......
Even if you're not a grandparent you will enjoy this. A teacher asked her young pupils how they spent their vacation.
One child wrote the following:
We always spend our vacation with Grandma and Grandpa.
They used to live here in a big, brick house, but Grandpa got retarded and they moved to Florida and now they live in a place with a lot of other retarded people. They live in a tin box and have rocks painted green to look like grass. They ride around on big tricycles and wear name tags because they don't know who they are anymore.
They go to a building called a wrecked center, but they must have got it fixed because it is all right now. They play games and do exercises there, but they don't do them very well.
There is a swimming pool too, but they all jump up and down in it with their hats on. I guess they don't know how to swim. At their gate there is a dollhouse with a little old man sitting in it. He watches all day so nobody can escape. Sometimes they sneak out. Then they go cruising in their golf carts.
My grandma used to bake cookies and stuff, but I guess she forgot how Nobody there cooks, they just eat out. And they eat the same thing every night: Early Birds.
Some of the people can't get past the man in the dollhouse to go out, so the ones who get out bring food back to the wrecked center and call it pot-luck.
My Grandma says Grandpa worked all his life to earn his retardment and says I should work hard so I can be retarded one day, too.
When I earn my retardment I want to be the man in the doll house. Then I will let people out so they can visit their grandchildren.
Frenchie, so nice to see you and you are very right.
But here is a chuckle for you all to read.
Retarded Grandparents......
Even if you're not a grandparent you will enjoy this. A teacher asked her young pupils how they spent their vacation.
One child wrote the following:
We always spend our vacation with Grandma and Grandpa.
They used to live here in a big, brick house, but Grandpa got retarded and they moved to Florida and now they live in a place with a lot of other retarded people. They live in a tin box and have rocks painted green to look like grass. They ride around on big tricycles and wear name tags because they don't know who they are anymore.
They go to a building called a wrecked center, but they must have got it fixed because it is all right now. They play games and do exercises there, but they don't do them very well.
There is a swimming pool too, but they all jump up and down in it with their hats on. I guess they don't know how to swim. At their gate there is a dollhouse with a little old man sitting in it. He watches all day so nobody can escape. Sometimes they sneak out. Then they go cruising in their golf carts.
My grandma used to bake cookies and stuff, but I guess she forgot how Nobody there cooks, they just eat out. And they eat the same thing every night: Early Birds.
Some of the people can't get past the man in the dollhouse to go out, so the ones who get out bring food back to the wrecked center and call it pot-luck.
My Grandma says Grandpa worked all his life to earn his retardment and says I should work hard so I can be retarded one day, too.
When I earn my retardment I want to be the man in the doll house. Then I will let people out so they can visit their grandchildren.
MaryBears
Literotica Guru
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- Apr 11, 2003
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FRENCHIE44T said:Hi Sexy,
Loads of hugs to you and licks & kisses all over. That must make me one of the smart ones then. But its not the size that matters its how you pleasure with it. Am I right ? And I'd luv to give you lots of pleasure
Hi Frenchie,
Yes that is true! Size don't matter...The way you use it is what matters....Awww thanks your such a sweetheart
FRENCHIE44T
Lover of oral sex
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- May 27, 2003
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- 16,625
MaryBears said:Hi Frenchie,
Yes that is true! Size don't matter...The way you use it is what matters....Awww thanks your such a sweetheart
Thanks MaryBears
although we are miles apart, (I'm in the U.K.) if I can do anything 4 U, you only have to ask, day or night, dont forget. Home is where the heart is. 
CatEyes
Happy
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- Jul 20, 2002
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Evening all. Hi Mary, hope you had yourself a good day hon.
Thought this one was cute:
It's the Spring of 1957 and Bobby goes to pick up his date.
He's a pretty hip guy with his own car. When he goes to the
front door, the girl's father answers and invites him in.
Carrie's not ready yet, so why don't you have a seat?," he
says. "That's cool" says Bobby.
Carrie's father asks Bobby what they're planning to do. Bobby
replies politely that they will probably just go to the soda
shop or a movie.
Carrie's father responds "why don't you two go out and screw?
I hear all the kids are doing it." Naturally, this comes as a
quite a surprise to Bobby-so he asks Carrie's Dad to repeat it.
"Yeah," says Carries father, "Carrie really likes to screw;
she'll screw all night if we let her!"
Well, this just made Bobby's eyes light up, and his plan for
the evening was beginning to look pretty good. A few minutes
later, Carrie comes downstairs in her little poodle skirt and
announces that she's ready to go. Almost breathless with
anticipation, Bobby escorts his date out the front door.
About 20 minutes later, Carrie rushes back into the house,
slams the door behind her, and screams at her father:
"Dammit Daddy! It's called the twist!"
Hi Mary, hope you had yourself a good day hon.Thought this one was cute:
It's the Spring of 1957 and Bobby goes to pick up his date.
He's a pretty hip guy with his own car. When he goes to the
front door, the girl's father answers and invites him in.
Carrie's not ready yet, so why don't you have a seat?," he
says. "That's cool" says Bobby.
Carrie's father asks Bobby what they're planning to do. Bobby
replies politely that they will probably just go to the soda
shop or a movie.
Carrie's father responds "why don't you two go out and screw?
I hear all the kids are doing it." Naturally, this comes as a
quite a surprise to Bobby-so he asks Carrie's Dad to repeat it.
"Yeah," says Carries father, "Carrie really likes to screw;
she'll screw all night if we let her!"
Well, this just made Bobby's eyes light up, and his plan for
the evening was beginning to look pretty good. A few minutes
later, Carrie comes downstairs in her little poodle skirt and
announces that she's ready to go. Almost breathless with
anticipation, Bobby escorts his date out the front door.
About 20 minutes later, Carrie rushes back into the house,
slams the door behind her, and screams at her father:
"Dammit Daddy! It's called the twist!"
CatEyes
Happy
- Joined
- Jul 20, 2002
- Posts
- 7,673
One more for you.
The other night I was invited out for a night with "the boys."
I told my wife that I would be home by midnight...promise!
Well, the hours passed and the beer was going down way too easy.
At around 3 A.M., drunk as a skunk, I headed for home. Just as
I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and
cuckooed 3 times.
Quickly, I realized she'd probably wake up, so I cuckooed another
9 times. I was really proud of myself, having a quick witty
solution, even when smashed, to escape a possible conflict.
The next morning my wife asked me what time I got in, and I told
her 12 o'clock. She didn't seem disturbed at all. Whew! Got
away with that one!
She then told me that we needed a new cuckoo clock. When I asked
her why she said, "Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times,
then said 'oh shit,' cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat,
cuckooed another 3 times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then
farted.
The other night I was invited out for a night with "the boys."
I told my wife that I would be home by midnight...promise!
Well, the hours passed and the beer was going down way too easy.
At around 3 A.M., drunk as a skunk, I headed for home. Just as
I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and
cuckooed 3 times.
Quickly, I realized she'd probably wake up, so I cuckooed another
9 times. I was really proud of myself, having a quick witty
solution, even when smashed, to escape a possible conflict.
The next morning my wife asked me what time I got in, and I told
her 12 o'clock. She didn't seem disturbed at all. Whew! Got
away with that one!
She then told me that we needed a new cuckoo clock. When I asked
her why she said, "Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times,
then said 'oh shit,' cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat,
cuckooed another 3 times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then
farted.
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