The Hypochondriac Cafe

[ABSTRUSE]

Something evil is lurking in my lower intestines....and giving birth.

 

[CharleyH]

Something evil is lurking in my lower intestines....and giving birth.

Shit, girl!

 

[Vermilion]

I think I'm getting what he's got...
x
V

 

[Misty_Morning]

I have had so much caffeine today that my left eye has been twitching uncontrollably for the last two hours...it's getting really fucking annoying.

 

[OhMissScarlett]

My ass is frozen. Is that an affliction?

 

[scheherazade_79]

I feel like a steam train ran over me once, then stopped, then reversed and did the same thing over again.

 

[Nirvanadragones]

I feel like a steam train ran over me once, then stopped, then reversed and did the same thing over again.

Lay off the rough sex, for a while, Sweetheart

 

[scheherazade_79]

Lay off the rough sex, for a while, Sweetheart

I said DON'T make me laugh!

Sex is the last thing on my mind at the moment, I swear...

 

[Nirvanadragones]

I said DON'T make me laugh!

Sex is the last thing on my mind at the moment, I swear...

Yes, Sex-kitten

 

[Vermilion]

OK. Seriously. Fiance has been in bed for 3 and a half hours and has sweated his way through 3 sets of clothing and 1 set of bedding. What do I do? Just help him change and make him hot water bottles? I don't know how to help him
x
V

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Stupid intestinal bug....

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Now my head hurts....I think its a brain tumor....sigh.

 

[scheherazade_79]

Now my head hurts....I think its a brain tumor....sigh.

Or maybe your brain just got so big, it's battling to get out and take over the world, like some horror movie....

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Or maybe your brain just got so big, it's battling to get out and take over the world, like some horror movie....

that would be soooooooo cool....a big cigar smokin brain!!

 

[scheherazade_79]

that would be soooooooo cool....a big cigar smokin brain!!

Devouring lesbians all over the globe, feeding on their orgasms

We could call it Attack of the Abstrusian Brain, and the population of Lit would be powerless to stop it

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Devouring lesbians all over the globe, feeding on their orgasms

We could call it Attack of the Abstrusian Brain, and the population of Lit would be powerless to stop it

I want you to write it...onlly you can do it justice!!!

 

[scheherazade_79]

I want you to write it...onlly you can do it justice!!!

Deal. I'll illustrate it as well

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Deal. I'll illustrate it as well

You're my hero.....I love your newsletters and such.

 

[kbate]

Stupid intestinal bug..

Yeah, yeah, that's your excuse for not coming to Punxsutawny? Lame. Forgiven but lame nevertheless.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Yeah, yeah, that's your excuse for not coming to Punxsutawny? Lame. Forgiven but lame nevertheless.

Um....I ran out of gas? didn't have toll money? have a fear of large biting rodents?

 

[kbate]

Um....I ran out of gas? didn't have toll money? have a fear of large biting rodents?

Or biting fear of a night of indescribable pleasure? We had that anyway... Sorry we missed.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Or biting fear of a night of indescribable pleasure? We had that anyway... Sorry we missed.

Raincheck?

 

[Misty_Morning]

I'm not feeling too good right now. My chest and left shoulder are hurting me and I feel like I'm gonna puke.

I gotta stop smoking.

 

[scheherazade_79]

My calves hurt I went walking up the hills yesterday... twice. Now it feels like I've got jellybabies for legs.

 

[scriptordelecto]

Feel like I'm breathing underwater.....I sound rather amphibious too. *whimper...whine....self-pity party*