The official Authors' Hangout Winter Holiday 2022 contest Support Thread

[Duleigh]

I think we need some gender equality here! Where is Millie? TP? Errr, who am I missing?!?!?


Its a little naughty. (Not too much though)

This is Literotica

Go for it!

 

[TxRad]

View attachment 2188471

My first crush. No, you won't find her on any TV show or movie.

 

[DarkRaven13]

This is Literotica

Go for it!

Ok, I will tell it, but seriously, any joke now that I tell will totally pale in comparison to the post that @TxRad just did! lol

 

[Voboy]

I think we need some gender equality here!

Feel free to join in. First Crushes are an interesting topic, and a refreshing change for the AH.

And yes. Tell the joke...

 

[DarkRaven13]

Joke:

Once upon a time there lived a woodcutter and his wife. They lived in the wood. One day the woodcutter found a mirror brought it home to show his wife. His wife, seeing the mirror, decided to hang it on the door.

As they looked in the mirror, they saw the reflection of a genie. The genie was glad to see someone after being hidden in the forest for so long.

"Thank you for rescuing me," he said. "I will grant you your wish. All you have to do is ask for what you want with a rhyme."

The woodcutters wife was excited and blurted out, "Mirror, mirror on the door, make my boobs a 44."

And *POOF* ... her boobs got huge.

The woodcutter was amazed. He wanted to try it as well, so he walked up to the mirror.

"Mirror, mirror on the door. Make my weenie touch the floor."

And *POOF*

His legs shank to 4 inches.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~``

Ahhhhhh hahahahahaha

 

[KeithD]

Going into the fourth day, and a separate listing page not yet indexed.

 

[Bazzle]

Got my Winter Holiday story posted this weekend here. Ratings are coming in lower than usual and I already got my first comment that makes me question some of the readership (again)!

Commenter called me out for unrealistic portrayal of the effects of alcohol and the age of the people involved. But..but... my author name and entire intro specifically talk about how I write (basically) true stories. I put things about aging in there, recovery time and additional lubricant. It's been 24 hours! Where is his holiday spirit?!?!?

Oh, and first TV crushes? Easy!

View attachment 2188451

I think your critical reader is trying to suggest when 'half cut' from a drinking session, you think you are amazing but actually you are a clumsy drunken fool. Both in and out of the bedroom.
Either way it was a good story.
B

 

[MajorRewrite]

The woodcutters wife was excited and blurted out, "Mirror, mirror on the door, make my boobs a 44."

And *POOF* ... her boobs got huge.

Um, is 44 the number from her bra size? If so, the genie didn’t increase her boob size. He increased the circumference of her chest (measured under the boobs). “Please, please make my boobs Ds“ might be a change to consider.

I apologize for being that person, but this bra size thing is a pet peeve.

Back to holiday story stuff: I wish the list of stories included the category and description, so I didn’t have to click on each to find out what it’s about.

 

[DarkRaven13]

Um, is 44 the number from her bra size? If so, the genie didn’t increase her boob size. He increased the circumference of her chest (measured under the boobs). “Please, please make my boobs Ds“ might be a change to consider.

I apologize for being that person, but this bra size thing is a pet peeve.

Back to holiday story stuff: I wish the list of stories included the category and description, so I didn’t have to click on each to find out what it’s about.

I was going to PM you ... but you have it turned off....but you are almost correct. I am impressed! Here's a little more so others know what we are talking about haha ...

In general what you mentioned is absolutely true ... the 44 would be the band size really. The letter is the cup size, and is determined by also measuring the chest size and subtracting the band size and doing crazy round-ups, then comparing them to some brand chart (different brands do it differently...so a Bali vs a Maindform or a Pepper can be different and that just kind of makes shopping for new ones hard. Think of it like shopping for new shoes....argh!) And an increase would only occur if it went from a lower letter to a higher one.

Ok, the upshot here is ... if I used what you said....the rhyme wouldn't work!!! Lol.

PS - Hey, I have to read and try and figure out what you all are talking about when you're going on about fixing things and boats and stuff, so I thought I would confuse you all

 

[Bazzle]

I was going to PM you ... but you have it turned off....but you are almost correct. I am impressed! Here's a little more so others know what we are talking about haha ...

In general what you mentioned is absolutely true ... the 44 would be the band size really. The letter is the cup size, and is determined by also measuring the chest size and subtracting the band size and doing crazy round-ups, then comparing them to some brand chart (different brands do it differently...so a Bali vs a Maindform or a Pepper can be different and that just kind of makes shopping for new ones hard. Think of it like shopping for new shoes....argh!) And an increase would only occur if it went from a lower letter to a higher one.

Ok, the upshot here is ... if I used what you said....the rhyme wouldn't work!!! Lol.

PS - Hey, I have to read and try and figure out what you all are talking about when you're going on about fixing things and boats and stuff, so I thought I would confuse you all

Most of my girls would have a 44 chest. They tend to be fat Heffer's...

 

[lovecraft68]

Just noticed the contest link isn't showing on the home page.

 

[TxRad]

Remind Laurel.

 

[Rustyoznail]

Just noticed the contest link isn't showing on the home page.

Seems to be a rash of comps/events at this time of year which overlap each other. I'll send Laurel a note asking for the AG event to be bumped off the front page and the Halloween link on the story page to be bumped.

FWIW, my winter story has been sitting in pending for nearly three days. Very unusual.

 

[KeithD]

FWIW, my winter story has been sitting in pending for nearly three days. Very unusual.

I usually have multiple entries and submit them on short fuses after the initial opening day posting. For the last two years, the delays in posting of these subsequent submissions have taken as long or longer to post than if they were regular list stories. Before that, any contest entry submitted would be up the next day. I have one submission to this contest that is on day two of a wait.

 

[lovecraft68]

Seems to be a rash of comps/events at this time of year which overlap each other. I'll send Laurel a note asking for the AG event to be bumped off the front page and the Halloween link on the story page to be bumped.

FWIW, my winter story has been sitting in pending for nearly three days. Very unusual.

Does she not know it started?

 

[Rustyoznail]

PM sent. Fingers crossed for some speedy action.

 

[Duleigh]

PM sent. Fingers crossed for some speedy action.

I sent one for my issue and no response yet

 

[Rustyoznail]

The front page has now changed. Hopefully the rest will follow.

 

[Duleigh]

No change on STORIES, CATEGORIES & MORE or anywhere else

 

[NotWise]

I suspect the update is delayed for a while because of Manu's technical work on the site. That happened a few years ago, and Laurel took the time to explain it to me when I complained. She's also not posted new stories to the contest.

It will happen when she can make it happen.

 

[dmallord]

View attachment 2188471

My first crush. No, you won't find her on any TV show or movie.

Say, Tx, I was noticing those knobs and it looks like a key slit er slot on your cabinet there. Those nobs seem a bit new. Like they haven't been used much. Take it the slot it locked and the key seems to be missing. Kind of antiquish bronzed with lovely shadows for definition on the woodgrain, too. Shame the lass stood in front of the doors, blocking a good photo's view.

Or was this about something else? I think I got lost in the image gazing for so long ...

 

[dmallord]

Oh, yes! I remember now. I posted a story for the winter theme about 2:00 AM this morning! It's pending review. Dang Tx ... don't do that!

 

[JuanSeiszFitzHall]

The Monthly contest winners for April have been posted. Maybe catching up on that is delaying completion time on other things.

 

[TxRad]

Sorry MrD, but the knobs and key slots are all original. The wardrobe in the background was her aunt's and it was all original also. Right down to the tiger eye maple veneer.

 

[Rustyoznail]

My story is listed as "new", to be published today. I'm not sure if that's my today, USA today which is yesterday here, or tomorrow's today... Bottom line is, it's been looked at.