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Don't call out the "wrong" name at the "wrong" time. 
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Belegon said:
Yep, generic terms are much safer, aren't they?
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neonlyte said:Not unless you want to be punished.
True. Hehehe!
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Yep, I stick to Twat. Always delivers. P.Tatelou said:Yep, generic terms are much safer, aren't they?
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perdita said:Yep, I stick to Twat. Always delivers. P.
I tried to say that once, but began laughing, so decided I'd use another term of endearment instead.
Colleen Thomas
Ultrafemme
- Joined
- Feb 11, 2002
- Posts
- 21,545
AS a serious aside, does anyone here call out your lover's name in the throes of passion? I tend not to be very coherent, and getting a name out seems like too much work.
-Colly
-Colly
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Colleen Thomas said:
Good point.
No, I honestly don't think I ever have. If I say anything it's usually something very crude, but never a name. But, I might say "babe" or "you sexy fucker" or words along those lines. LOL
Lou
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Belegon said:
That reminds me of that scene in Grease, with Rizzo and Knickey (sp?) in the back of the car.
"Say my name."
"Oooh, Rizzo."
"No, my real name."
"Oh, um."
"Betty."
"Oooh, Betty, Betty. BETTY!"
lilith1979
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Oct 14, 2003
- Posts
- 216
As much as you may desire it as a parent, quiet children are rarely a good thing.
gauchecritic
When there are grey skies
- Joined
- Jul 25, 2002
- Posts
- 7,076
Top Tips from the pages of Viz;
A Post-it note stuck beneath the nose is an ideal detterent to lip-readers.
For Julian from Anglian Homes. Cover up the mouthpiece on your phone next time you ask your supervisor what to do, and he replies "make something up."
The next time you begin a sentence with "It goes without saying..." simply shut up then.
If you fall out with your penfriend send only empty envelopes until you're back on speaking terms.
Shoppers; if what you wish to purchase is not in stock, inform the assistant that you've come all the way from Stanely on the No2 bus. They will then take pity on you and have your item materialize out of thin fucking air.
Homeowners. Don't hesitate to tell the rest of us how much your house has appreciated in value since you bought it. The more frequently you give us updates, the greater will be our delight at your good fortune and our admiration and respect for your financial prescience.
Blind people; Give yourself at least a chance of seeing something by not wearing heavy dark glasses all the time.
Deaf people; Wearing oven gloves outdoors is an ideal way to stop strangers from eavesdropping on your conversation.
Olympic commentators; Inform the audience how old the female gymnasts are before they start their routine, thus preventing any illegal thoughts involving their flexibility.
and finally;
Editors of Adult Humour Comics; Why not rage against the society that perpetuates low morale, low quality, disenfranchised lives for the social class 5s, whilst propping up your flagging income by advertising products that promote violence, aggressive sexual objectification of women, dehumanisation of minority social groups and substance misuse. You'll hardly notice the emotional dissonance of living comfortably whilst encouraging individuals to continue a cycle of depravation and nihilism in their funny little council estates.
Gauche
A Post-it note stuck beneath the nose is an ideal detterent to lip-readers.
For Julian from Anglian Homes. Cover up the mouthpiece on your phone next time you ask your supervisor what to do, and he replies "make something up."
The next time you begin a sentence with "It goes without saying..." simply shut up then.
If you fall out with your penfriend send only empty envelopes until you're back on speaking terms.
Shoppers; if what you wish to purchase is not in stock, inform the assistant that you've come all the way from Stanely on the No2 bus. They will then take pity on you and have your item materialize out of thin fucking air.
Homeowners. Don't hesitate to tell the rest of us how much your house has appreciated in value since you bought it. The more frequently you give us updates, the greater will be our delight at your good fortune and our admiration and respect for your financial prescience.
Blind people; Give yourself at least a chance of seeing something by not wearing heavy dark glasses all the time.
Deaf people; Wearing oven gloves outdoors is an ideal way to stop strangers from eavesdropping on your conversation.
Olympic commentators; Inform the audience how old the female gymnasts are before they start their routine, thus preventing any illegal thoughts involving their flexibility.
and finally;
Editors of Adult Humour Comics; Why not rage against the society that perpetuates low morale, low quality, disenfranchised lives for the social class 5s, whilst propping up your flagging income by advertising products that promote violence, aggressive sexual objectification of women, dehumanisation of minority social groups and substance misuse. You'll hardly notice the emotional dissonance of living comfortably whilst encouraging individuals to continue a cycle of depravation and nihilism in their funny little council estates.
Gauche
