Virgins! (male or female)

[Keyser711]

Alright, i know this is gonna go against the strong liberal "more sex for all" ideologies shared by most everyone on this site but here goes: I'm 18, a virgin, and completely damn proud of it. The author of this post may be shy, and that's no problem, but I'm not, and never have been. I talk with girls all the time, hang out with them, go out with them. But don't feel like throwing something away. To the people who say you should just get it over with, obviously the guy you were with didn't know what goes where. Just because you've never done something before, doesn't mean that you are going to be bad at it your first time.

And i know i'm gonna take ALOT of flack for this, but to all the girls who had sex when they were 12 and 13 years old?!?! Would you like me to look up whore in the dictionary and email you your picture which is probably placed next to the word. If you have sex when you're 13?!!?! I don't think there's any other word to describe you other than whore. Dirty slut maybe. Picture your virginity as the new pair of white sneakers you buy in the spring.

Now, i know most peoples usually put off wearing them for at least a while. Don't want to get them dirty right? And then a week later when it's lightly raining out, you make excuses not to wear them. After all, they're only going to be perfectly clean once right? And once you wear them, they become dirty and used?

Quite an anology i know, but if you think about it, it serves its purpose. I have no desire to just "get rid of something," like this.
(And to those wondering, no i am not some ugly fat kid who has no friends and is venting my anger on the world. hehehe)


I myself would NEVER have sex with a girl who has had sex previously. After all, like the sneakers, this girl is now dirty. She's been used by someone else and discarded. When you go shopping, do you want to buy the new Nike's, or the old, used, Rebok's??

This website is obviously infinitely free speech and wild sex and all that jazz, which is fine. But realize that if people wanna whore themselves out before they hit puberty then that's your business. Don't let them fool you into thinking that you have to, simply in order to "fit in." My advice is just to have confidence in yourself, and your nervousness will slowly fade away. And now the Hate Mail hehehe... alright i'm listening

 

[Thaedes]

Hey there. For those of you who were curious, Yes is my answer. Yes I am a virgin. An 18 year old virgin.

I read some of the posts on this thread and shake my head, because I am saddened. Someone has made the arguement that "virgin's" don't know what they are doing, that they need to be "shown" how to do things. I cannot agree. Because one is a virgin does not mean that one has not been sexually active up to a certain point.

I think that perhaps some people should not generalize so much, and really understand that each person is unique. Virginity is a point in a persons life, not a description or accounting of that person. Some say it is something to be treasured, others say it is a disease to be rid of. Ultimately it is the virgin's decision, and is subject to the individuals point of view.

I am a virgin, not because I cannot lose my virginity if I tried, not because I want to be. I am a virgin because the girl I have fallen for has moved away, and I cannot pursue such a wonderful experince with her. For now I am content to be a virgin, I have no overriding desire to lose it at this moment (though don't get me wrong I'm still rather horny - being 18 year old guy and all).

I hope that people see beyond stereotypes and generalizations. It is unfair not only to those who are being mistreated, but unfair to yourself because you limit yourself. So enrich yourself and be open to things

 

[Lust Engine]

maybe you just think about sex too much when you're with the one you care about.

STOP THINKING ABOUT BEING A VIRGIN!

so, concentrate on your real problem and cease the complaints on the "curse" or "nightmare" of your virginity

I couldn't agree more! The more you think about it, I'm willing to bet that it'll drive you that much more nuts about it. No need to obsess over the sex part; get into a relationship first and foremost. Develop that and the sex will naturally occur as you draw closer to each other.

Y'know...I've never been mauled by a one eyed Tasmanian Devil either, but I'm not going to obsess over the fear of it either. We've both got bigger fish to fry in this world. Have faith in yourself and things will more than work out.

Years from now, you'll look back & laugh at this.

 

[Wolf_Song]

Quote from thread mentioned in my above post..

originally posted by Wolf_Song

Some thoughts;

Some people lose it just to get it over with, some wait for some one special, some never lose it, some are born with out the choice.. some have no choice when it is taken from them.


The judgement call is that you all have free choice and that what you are comfortable with yourself is what really matters.


Before choosing to do any thing it is a good idea always to look at the opinions of those whom have experience. Whether through conversations or reading and then forming your own opinion. Some wish things had been different for them and others are happy with how things turned out.

I know many virgins of different age groups, even several are past fifty years. Each has their own experiences as to why this is so and in each circumstance I was able to learn why. Due to them being able to talk about it, with knowing I would listen and be respectful of what they had to say. As well it helped them to have some one to be able to talk about it then and in future. And if I should have children one day it will be easier to talk to them about it as well.

Several of these people I mention chose to remain thusly due to health problems. Which are now or in future debilitating either physically, mentally or both. They love children and choose not to pass on to another generation what has happened to them. They dont want for others to suffer as they have nor to watch them suffer.. especially children.

In closing if some one is going to pressure or play you in to a situation that you are uncomfortable with. Then they may not have your best interests at heart and either a second or multiple opinions is worth consideration.


Hearts blessings to all

The above quote is in response to Keyser711's last post which doesnt fairly take in to consideration of those whom didnt have a free choice when came to virginity. Those whom have been forced or manipulated due to means beyond there control.

Quite simply your statement isnt fair to these people whom have gone through such trauma and still live with it. As you may one day fall in love with some one whom has gone through this and will have to rethink your above stated views.

Keyser711 I do respect personal choice on virginity. But your group labelling unfairly those whom you dont understand.. I totally disagree with. Whether raped or having freely enjoined in intercourse doesnt make a woman "dirty". Those that judge these ladies accordingly are the "dirty" ones to me.

Your analogy is narrow and close minded.. to say the least.

 

[Weird Harold]

I am a virgin, not because I cannot lose my virginity if I tried, not because I want to be. I am a virgin because the girl I have fallen for has moved away, and I cannot pursue such a wonderful experince with her. For now I am content to be a virgin, I have no overriding desire to lose it at this moment (though don't get me wrong I'm still rather horny - being 18 year old guy and all).

I hope that people see beyond stereotypes and generalizations. It is unfair not only to those who are being mistreated, but unfair to yourself because you limit yourself. So enrich yourself and be open to things

Well said, and probably all the more effective coming from you instead of us "old farts."

You have a healthy and well balanced handle on your sexuality and I heartily commend you for it. Especially when your attitude is contrasted with Keyser711's puritanical and judgemental post just before it.

 

[virginleo20]

slightly annoying...

i find it slightly annoying that people automatically assume that a person is lacking in the capasity to give pleasure etc if they admit to being a viring..... mind you that the level of ones experience
in reality has little to do with the level of ones knowledge.

thats just my oppinion.. being a "virgin" and all.... prejudice can be quite annoying...

To me id rather find that 1 person and stick with her for the next 80 odd years and not bother with the whole multiple random partner scene that about 99% of people aparently are in to
mind you that to me a person is a whore ie. slut.. regardless of gender... and hence not really worth bothering with.

Not to menton all the fun of having to listen to the whining about the jerks they have dated in the past.. as if i could help in that matter in anyway and then being reminded of how people in the same situations as they have been in have treated little old me in the past.... so on and so forth.... with all of their experiences having had absolutely nothing to do with me ....

but that is entirely based on a mountain of psychological and physical abuse caused by basically every "normal" person i have ever known... which results in a feeling of extreme discomfort when i woman even tries to make contact with me a hug feels like something comparable to "rape" without the aspect of penetration.

But then again how would others feel like when the best responce you have recieved has been getting laughed at
or spat on when you tried to get to know someone
and going for 20 years before a simple thing as a hug ever occured... holding hands with someone or something as simple as a kiss has yet to happen and propably never will.




So just to make my point short regardless of your status virgin or non.... as long as you are not as psychologically damaged as i am... i think that youll be fine in the end.. regardless of how many years it takes to get to where you want to go.


By the way if anyone is wondering of my emotional status while writing this.. its something comparable to those stimulation starved resus monkeys they had locked up in cages in laboratories back in the day.... just sitting in a ball in a corner shivering away maybe twiching every now and again...

 

[Wolf_Song]

Re: slightly annoying...

So just to make my point short regardless of your status virgin or non.... as long as you are not as psychologically damaged as i am... i think that youll be fine in the end.. regardless of how many years it takes to get to where you want to go.


By the way if anyone is wondering of my emotional status while writing this.. its something comparable to those stimulation starved resus monkeys they had locked up in cages in laboratories back in the day.... just sitting in a ball in a corner shivering away maybe twiching every now and again...

With regards to the tests you mentioned of rhesus monkeys, there have been many and possibly you are referring to the ones done in france during cold war era. Where three female monkeys were each placed in a cage. One which had a terry cloth stuffed representation of a mother, the second having a wire frame and the third having nothing to cling to in comfort. Each was raised in isolation to the age considered mature for rhesus monkeys.

When later introduced to a family of rhesus monkeys the first was timid and adapted to general populace slow and mated. The second one was even more timid than the first and took longer to adapt to every thing. The third monkey was to mentally damaged and ended up unable to adjust and died alone in a corner.

Whether my recall on this test information after not reviewing it for over a decade is entirely accurate isnt overly relevant to me.

As to such studies as above being conducted to where common sense people could have figured out the same with out the tests.. is left to that research study group.

Though you virginleo20 are not a monkey and are a human being whom has choices those monkeys didnt. You have choices to learn about yourself and communicate positively.. which you have already done with posting herein.. which I compliment you in the highest for.

To understand more of self there are numerous ways whether psychology, astrology or numerology to name but three. I chose these in example as my own researchings of self in life found it interesting of the similiar characteristics each of the three pointing out many similiar things. Plus they give allowances in consideration whether some one is more comfortable with science or spirituality for self discovery.

And every day is discovery of self and the world when we open our hearts and minds to learn more. Be what you are comfortable being currently then take steps forward when you are ready to do so.

Herein of Lit are many interesting people with a great variety of ideas, thoughts and perceptions to share. The boards are definitely worth reading and learning from as people share more openly here than in many other net mediums.

Chances are you may face ridicule from some who dont understand you nor your perspectives. But what matters is you.. dont forget that.. your an individual with choices in life and can make many dreams come true.


Hearts blessings with best wished to you virginleo20

 

[Caliber]

I have to agree with Svenskaflicka all the way. Everyone always said save it for the right time, the right girl. Never, EVER, made any sense to me.

My first time was fun, I'll admit. It was also pretty embarassing. I came 3 times, probably with less than 10 thrusts between all of them.

I enjoyed it, but my girl was quite displeased (a fact she voiced to me in fact.) I just don't get the whole saving thing.

As for the original poster, for the longest time I was likewise wondering when I was going to "get my chance" as it were. I was helped partly because I had several friends who were virgins too, so I didn't feel too much pressure.

The only advice I can really offer is to get past the shyness. I used to be really shy, but after I lose the big V, I have become WAY more outward with women. I can freely talk to them without any kind of stress.

As for Keyser711, while you do have the right to say what you want, what you said was plain and simply mean. I am honestly suprised someone with such an outlook on life would be on Literotica. I guess thats just a stereotype but ...

 

[peachykeen]

Keyser711, could you be MORE judgemental? Your personal choices are yours, and just as no one has a right to judge you for those that you make, you have no right to criticize others. Plus I notice that your post was directed to all the "girls" who had sex at a young age when you called them whores...what exactly does that make the boys, then?

 

[Thaedes]

Weird Harold - Thanks for your comment. It's nice to know now and then that my words are actually being heard. Or atleast in this case read

virginleo20 - I mean not to pick on you, or in any way insult you. But I thought that maybe I might have something of interest to say to you. First of all you are a human being. You are not a monkey, and not some wild animal. That means you have the power to think, to reason, to utilize the wonderful gift of conciousness. I once heard a quote, from where I am no longer certain, but I am certain it is quite true. "Every human being has the ability within himself to heal his wounds." It applies to women to, regardless of how it was worded. In any case, to say that you are, "psychologically damaged" is perhaps the worst of your problems right now. Admitedly I cannot even begin to fathom what trauma's you may have had as you grew up, or in the recent past. In truth I cannot even begin to comprehend your psychology. However, you can heal it all. The mind is a powerful tool, especially when one applies it. Firstly you must stop saying you are psychologically damaged, because this alters your mindset, it makes you predisposed to depression. It forms a destructive loop, wherein you get caught up always thinking how miserable you are, how unwanted, and so many other things. There are so many things I would like to say to you, but I don't want to force my opinions on you. I sincerely wish you can master your problems and be at peace with yourself.

Well anyways, I think I've said enough. Cheers!

 

[Keyser711]

Well first of all, let me say how much i LOVE how all of a sudden i'm "narrow and close minded."
It seems that whenever someone doesn't have a view that agrees with the politically correct majority, then they MUST be "close minded."
Second, whoever mentioned rape, that's obviously a different situation. Rapists should receieve the same penalty as murderers in my mind, preferebly the death penalty. I was speaking about girls who feel like whoring themselves out at an early age, and then expect the nice gentleman that they want to marry to "understand" and start to sleep with them.
Third, to the woman who mentioned guy virgins vs. girl virgins.
You have to realize that one, girls are viewed as purer and cleaner and more beautifl than guys, as they should be. I would hope they would also be more intelligent and understand what makes them special. However, to answer your question, you're exactely correct. Guys should not be able to "whore themselves out" either. Despite what people think, a guy is NOT cool, based on how much sex he has.

 

[Wolf_Song]

Alright, i know this is gonna go against the strong liberal "more sex for all" ideologies shared by most everyone on this site but here goes: I'm 18, a virgin, and completely damn proud of it. The author of this post may be shy, and that's no problem, but I'm not, and never have been. I talk with girls all the time, hang out with them, go out with them. But don't feel like throwing something away. To the people who say you should just get it over with, obviously the guy you were with didn't know what goes where. Just because you've never done something before, doesn't mean that you are going to be bad at it your first time.

And i know i'm gonna take ALOT of flack for this, but to all the girls who had sex when they were 12 and 13 years old?!?! Would you like me to look up whore in the dictionary and email you your picture which is probably placed next to the word. If you have sex when you're 13?!!?! I don't think there's any other word to describe you other than whore. Dirty slut maybe. Picture your virginity as the new pair of white sneakers you buy in the spring.

Now, i know most peoples usually put off wearing them for at least a while. Don't want to get them dirty right? And then a week later when it's lightly raining out, you make excuses not to wear them. After all, they're only going to be perfectly clean once right? And once you wear them, they become dirty and used?

Quite an anology i know, but if you think about it, it serves its purpose. I have no desire to just "get rid of something," like this.
(And to those wondering, no i am not some ugly fat kid who has no friends and is venting my anger on the world. hehehe)


I myself would NEVER have sex with a girl who has had sex previously. After all, like the sneakers, this girl is now dirty. She's been used by someone else and discarded. When you go shopping, do you want to buy the new Nike's, or the old, used, Rebok's??

This website is obviously infinitely free speech and wild sex and all that jazz, which is fine. But realize that if people wanna whore themselves out before they hit puberty then that's your business. Don't let them fool you into thinking that you have to, simply in order to "fit in." My advice is just to have confidence in yourself, and your nervousness will slowly fade away. And now the Hate Mail hehehe... alright i'm listening

Yes this post of yours is very narrow and close minded as it generalizes all ladies whom dont meet your standards as "dirty". With out taking in to consideration those whom have been raped or manipulated to name but two.

Though to have a more open minded opinion you would have to talk to some of those whom have gone through this. Some with it fresh in memory or those having flashbacks decades later due to rape trauma.

I have met a lot of rape victims in my life time and they are some of the best people I have met or will ever meet. Every one of them is far better than your generalized judgements Keyser711.

And as far as changing your opinion to those whom.. as you put it "whore" themselves out at an early age goes. That still is narrow and close minded as at those ages one is going through many body changes. With additions of peer, societal and family pressures compounding and often made more so by the physical bodies changes.

Also your initial analogy and last post dont take in to consideration those whom come from dysfunctional back grounds. Or have been caught up in something generational where rape is an accepted familial practice. One example is that child pornography ring recently busted up. Where the parents performed sexual acts on the children and allowed others to do so. These children are innocents caught up in something beyond dysfunctional.. they are not "dirty".

 

[Weird Harold]

It seems that whenever someone doesn't have a view that agrees with the politically correct majority, then they MUST be "close minded."
...
Despite what people think, a guy is NOT cool, based on how much sex he has.

The world is not black and white, nor composed of absolutes. People who make blanket statements that indicate they think otherwise are "narrow minded" whther their stance is "politically incorrect" or not.

At least you don't subscribe completely to a double standard although your apparent views on a "woman's place" would seem to indicate you don't consider them fully human. Woman are NOT some object to be kept on a sliver pedestal and taken down to worship only when you need them.

Women are human beings with human foibles -- the sooner youlearn to think of them tht way, the sooner you'll find one tht will put up with you.

 

[horny_giraffe]

I don't know what "the truth" about virginity is, but I can tell you my story.

I lost my virginity at the ripe old age of 28. I felt that I wasted a lot of years suffering with this negative view of myself as a virgin.

I'd been in the Marines when I was younger. Let me tell you that that was tough being a virgin, then. (Not staying a virgin--that was easy. What could be easier than staying a virgin? You don't have to do anything--it just comes naturally.) But it was tough being teased, branded as a loser. I learned to keep my mouth shut. Even tougher, was trying to manuever through dating and sex while in the Marines. It was not a helpful environment, in that respect. As time went on, I felt more and more to be a freak.

Once I got out, I looked at some hardcore porn...sort of aclimated myself to the idea. That helped, a little. But my dad gave me some of the best advice. He said "Don't try to read women's minds. Ask for what you want, and wait for replies."

After that, I kind of had a revelation. As I figured it, I needed to start a little smaller. Kissing, for example. I'd never been "necking" with a woman.

So, finally, I met a nice woman. Reasonably attractive. I'd met other women, but I didn't know quite what to do. After hanging out at the mall for a while, I figured out that she liked me.

So later on, when she suggested a movie at her place, I said okay. She was just thinking a movie, so it took her by surprise when I added "But you don't have a couch...so how will we cuddle?" So later, we sat on some blankets in front of her tv.

I don't remember what I said, but I eventually worked me way from hugging/cuddling to kissing. After some extended kissing, we called it a night.

We did a movie and kissing every week for--I don't know--five or six weeks. Then we started going to "dry humping" and eventually the clothes came off. She says that I pushed her into it, but it was pretty mutual by my estimation--and very gradual.

After that, sex came pretty frequently for a while.

I'm in kind of a dry spell, now, but it doesn't really bother me. From experience, I know now that sex is not the goal of my life. But without the experience, how would I have known this?

Society doesn't go away. Certainly, my family and friends supported me and didn't object to my chastity. But when the media and casual acquaintances tell you that you are a freak, you start to believe it.

Say what you want. Say virginity or sex is no big deal. But the "virgin" title is one that I am darn happy to lose. I wish I'd lost it a lot earlier.

 

[peachykeen]

well Keyser I sure hope you have lots of luck finding yourself a nice pure set of new sneakers to fuck.

grow up.

 

[Lust Engine]

And i know i'm gonna take ALOT of flack for this, but to all the girls who had sex when they were 12 and 13 years old?!?! Would you like me to look up whore in the dictionary and email you your picture which is probably placed next to the word. If you have sex when you're 13?!!?! I don't think there's any other word to describe you other than whore. Dirty slut maybe. Picture your virginity as the new pair of white sneakers you buy in the spring.

I guess my query into this subject would be to you regarding the age/ maturity issue.

At what point are you mature enough to handle having sex? Is it 18? 19? 36?? Obviously those 12-13 year old girls that do have sex think they do. So if you're 42 and have sex for the very first time, does that still make you a slut???

It's going to be an awkward step regardless of the age. It's the maturity in handling the issues with losing one's virginity that matter, not some arbitrary age mandated by those of you who condsider yourself more righteous.

 

[deliciea]

virgin to be or not to be

ok I know that i am very new to lit but could not pass up the subjet at hand .......

being a virgin is not a bad thing when the right one comes along maybe you will know maybe you wont i have some bad stories for my self and wish i had waited for that special some one or even for the right time doing something for peer pressure is not the right reason to do it when you feel like your ready the right person will be there for some of us it is better for it to be someone we will never see or know agian for others it has to be with the one soul mate i wish all virgin the best and hope they never go thru what most of us have and be proud that you are a virgin it is not something every one can claim

 

[virginleo20]

Wolf_Song and Thaedes

thanks for your reply id just like to say that...

I'm fully aware of the fact that I'm not a monkey...
but I wanted to make a reference point of the emotional state I was in at... which by the way does not meant that I behave in the described manner.
As to self actualization etc. id have to say I go for the psychological aspect of it all in a way of analyzing and breaking down behaviors and thoughts then dealing with them in a manner appropriate to the situation...
This has served me well enough as is and is comparable to the ability to heal one self mentioned by Thaedes.
That's how I have survived so far...

I used the Rhesus monkey experiments as a reference of how the aspect of stimulation depravation affects human development and how in the long term such an environment will affect ones world view. Not to even mention the shitty things in life and their effects on the whole.
Again I would like to mention the fact that just because I have such an emotional back draft from certain situations does not mean that I behave in such a manner nor does it mean that
I reflect and project a certain type of an attitude about my self.
I only tried to point out a piece of my reality.

As to relationships etc.... what my reality from all of my past experiences is pretty much as follows.
When I hang around a person.. regardless of gender and or relationship status.. I'm just like any other normal person joking around laughing and having fun... this is as long as I don't have to watch them "have fun" i.e. party, drink, have their "relationships"
and then listen to the problems they deal with as resulting from those things, etc.... why you ask... well quite simply this...

I have the tendency to get flashbacks from my memory of all of the bad things in my life that have been associated with similar or same behavior models. Best description would be a sharp pain in my head with a need to vomit while not being able to deal with the flood for memories by any other means then by leaving the situation they are related to. Then going on forward with trying to lessen the time spent with the individual with whom such things have happened... why you ask again flashbacks that wont go away.

Now compare the reference from rhesus monkeys and what nots...... as response to negative stimulus or lack there of...
Just a piece of my reality... how about yours

Oh by the way since I don't drink or do any drugs what so ever
there is a tendency of such behavior and involvement within such situations in causing flashbacks etc.... psychiatric medication is out of the question... then try to find some psychiatrist or psychologist whom does not have conflict of self interest trough actualization of flaws in their own behavior trough the pain
I have had to suffer due to such possible behavior... be it by intention or not. i.e. if they drink (bar hop) etc. they might not want to deal with a patient whom has had to suffer greatly due to such behavior both by the intentions of the people doing so and by the consequences and repercussions of the actions of people doing so be it intentional or not.. it does not really matter,
now does it.

By the way I have no prejudice against people or the things they do just a lot of associated "crap" which they might not be conscious of.
Oh and by the way it does not matter if someone has actually behaved in a manner that has caused little old me suffering
when participating with a behavior.. due to stimulant specific generalization watching someone doing something as simple as drinking a beer causes the flashbacks...

I wont even go the different degrees of which the flashback come in but they range from slight headache to nervous twitch to
almost the stress level of inducing nosebleeds.

in short Rhesus monkey comparison is not whom I am only how I feel and how I feel is not how I behave....


Oh and if your wondering about why I'm posting this stuff on a porn site.. well I do try to look for answers to my questions from any possible source available when observing human behavior...
what better place to observe the range of developmental sexual characteristic etc... and trough that maybe find a piece I require to heal something more of my self away...

 

[virginleo20]

Oh and sorry if my repl;y is long and complex but thats what i am and thats what i look for in people... part of the suffering bit again... dumb people= head pain and flash backs.... but you guys are cool. At leas you didnt go and try to push some logig behind denial on me since thats what sertain individuals have done just to mock me for what ever reason... their own self actualization perhaps.

 

[princessa]

Alright, i know this is gonna go against the strong liberal "more sex for all" ideologies shared by most everyone on this site but here goes: I'm 18, a virgin, and completely damn proud of it. The author of this post may be shy, and that's no problem, but I'm not, and never have been. I talk with girls all the time, hang out with them, go out with them. But don't feel like throwing something away. To the people who say you should just get it over with, obviously the guy you were with didn't know what goes where. Just because you've never done something before, doesn't mean that you are going to be bad at it your first time.

And i know i'm gonna take ALOT of flack for this, but to all the girls who had sex when they were 12 and 13 years old?!?! Would you like me to look up whore in the dictionary and email you your picture which is probably placed next to the word. If you have sex when you're 13?!!?! I don't think there's any other word to describe you other than whore. Dirty slut maybe. Picture your virginity as the new pair of white sneakers you buy in the spring.

Now, i know most peoples usually put off wearing them for at least a while. Don't want to get them dirty right? And then a week later when it's lightly raining out, you make excuses not to wear them. After all, they're only going to be perfectly clean once right? And once you wear them, they become dirty and used?

Quite an anology i know, but if you think about it, it serves its purpose. I have no desire to just "get rid of something," like this.
(And to those wondering, no i am not some ugly fat kid who has no friends and is venting my anger on the world. hehehe)


I myself would NEVER have sex with a girl who has had sex previously. After all, like the sneakers, this girl is now dirty. She's been used by someone else and discarded. When you go shopping, do you want to buy the new Nike's, or the old, used, Rebok's??

This website is obviously infinitely free speech and wild sex and all that jazz, which is fine. But realize that if people wanna whore themselves out before they hit puberty then that's your business. Don't let them fool you into thinking that you have to, simply in order to "fit in." My advice is just to have confidence in yourself, and your nervousness will slowly fade away. And now the Hate Mail hehehe... alright i'm listening

oh. my. god.

you intolerant (use your own curses cause i usually don't say them and don't intend to type them here either)

how in the world are you open minded enough to be at a sex site?

"I myself would NEVER have sex with a girl who has had sex previously. After all, like the sneakers, this girl is now dirty. She's been used by someone else and discarded. "???

you PRESUME that you can possibly compare a HUMAN BEING and a pair of SNEAKERS?

"(And to those wondering, no i am not some ugly fat kid who has no friends and is venting my anger on the world. hehehe)"

i bet you aren't! you're probably some spoiled rich kid that never saw a dirty sidewalk and had a fat trust fund from dear old granddaddy.

"And i know i'm gonna take ALOT of flack for this, but to all the girls who had sex when they were 12 and 13 years old?!?! Would you like me to look up whore in the dictionary and email you your picture which is probably placed next to the word."

ya think that girls sexually abused by their daddies or stepdaddies or other relatives are whores too?

ever stop for a moment to think about those people that don't live in huge mansions as fine as yours and barely make a living?

is it really some poor girl's fault if she's born in a poor neighborhood or just never was raised by her parents that sex at 12 or 13 is wrong?

please. do the rest of us a favor and remove you snobbish overprivileged little elitist ASS out of here.

 

[virginleo20]

oh and guys sorry if i babble like mojo jojo... but i try to think of as many ways of writing somehitng as possible since it has been known that some people miss the point if i dont repeat my self....
often.

 

[Wolf_Song]

Wolf_Song and Thaedes

thanks for your reply id just like to say that...

I'm fully aware of the fact that I'm not a monkey...
but I wanted to make a reference point of the emotional state I was in at... which by the way does not meant that I behave in the described manner.
As to self actualization etc. id have to say I go for the psychological aspect of it all in a way of analyzing and breaking down behaviors and thoughts then dealing with them in a manner appropriate to the situation...
This has served me well enough as is and is comparable to the ability to heal one self mentioned by Thaedes.
That's how I have survived so far...

"Which is totally admirable of how you have been handling things. Exceptionally commendable how you havent let your pains build to bitterness and lash out at others unnecessarily. Which shows a lot of character and takes a lot of courage in its own right."

I used the Rhesus monkey experiments as a reference of how the aspect of stimulation depravation affects human development and how in the long term such an environment will affect ones world view. Not to even mention the shitty things in life and their effects on the whole.
Again I would like to mention the fact that just because I have such an emotional back draft from certain situations does not mean that I behave in such a manner nor does it mean that
I reflect and project a certain type of an attitude about my self.
I only tried to point out a piece of my reality.

" Your openness in these matters I truly commend and you have communicated yourself excellently in this. With what you have above said I studied to a degree as well in discovery of self and related to it as well then. Thus my past posting in reply to the details of the rhesus testing that I had looked at. So those unfamiliar with it could more understand what you were saying as well."

As to relationships etc.... what my reality from all of my past experiences is pretty much as follows.
When I hang around a person.. regardless of gender and or relationship status.. I'm just like any other normal person joking around laughing and having fun... this is as long as I don't have to watch them "have fun" i.e. party, drink, have their "relationships"
and then listen to the problems they deal with as resulting from those things, etc.... why you ask... well quite simply this...

I have the tendency to get flashbacks from my memory of all of the bad things in my life that have been associated with similar or same behavior models. Best description would be a sharp pain in my head with a need to vomit while not being able to deal with the flood for memories by any other means then by leaving the situation they are related to. Then going on forward with trying to lessen the time spent with the individual with whom such things have happened... why you ask again flashbacks that wont go away.

"A lot of what you are describing is due to the past pains you mention and as well anxiety. Anxiety is part of being human and every person is unique in the levels of such they have. Your doing the right thing in talking now to people whom have actually gone through much of what you are speaking of in different degrees. Your communicating and that is an essential in all aspects of life.. especially when meet some one special that may lead to more than just friendship."

Now compare the reference from rhesus monkeys and what nots...... as response to negative stimulus or lack there of...
Just a piece of my reality... how about yours

"My reality ? I can relate to a lot of what you are saying due to so much violence in my life as a child and adult. Whether unasked for upon myself or in defending others in multiple situations and areas. With having faced death more times in life than even my excellent memory can recall. But alike yourself I choose not to let it build to bitterness lashing out to others whom dont deserve it.

Instead it has given me an extreme appreciation for and insights to life beyond what many can fathom. As well having met many in this life in various parts of the world in person and on line. Whom have gone through many diverse experiences and I learn more every day."

Oh by the way since I don't drink or do any drugs what so ever
there is a tendency of such behavior and involvement within such situations in causing flashbacks etc.... psychiatric medication is out of the question... then try to find some psychiatrist or psychologist whom does not have conflict of self interest trough actualization of flaws in their own behavior trough the pain
I have had to suffer due to such possible behavior... be it by intention or not. i.e. if they drink (bar hop) etc. they might not want to deal with a patient whom has had to suffer greatly due to such behavior both by the intentions of the people doing so and by the consequences and repercussions of the actions of people doing so be it intentional or not.. it does not really matter,
now does it.

"I rarely drink and dont do drugs myself as they have minimal effect upon me and really dont need them. As far as psychologists goes, I went to one once was quite happy with the experience. They asked blunt questions and I gave blunt answers with results that helped me to learn more about myself as a person.

Often recommended by one of my closest friends is to see a child therapist. She went to many types of doctors over the years with medications and things not helping her. Though once she went to child therapist she learned that most of the issues she had were due to childhood experiences. She still goes several times a year for herself and says it helps her dealing with issues in being a mother."

By the way I have no prejudice against people or the things they do just a lot of associated "crap" which they might not be conscious of.
Oh and by the way it does not matter if someone has actually behaved in a manner that has caused little old me suffering
when participating with a behavior.. due to stimulant specific generalization watching someone doing something as simple as drinking a beer causes the flashbacks...

I wont even go the different degrees of which the flashback come in but they range from slight headache to nervous twitch to
almost the stress level of inducing nosebleeds.

in short Rhesus monkey comparison is not whom I am only how I feel and how I feel is not how I behave....

"What you are talking about here is in a lot anxiety due to stressful issues in your life. But a lot of this can be conquered by getting to know yourself more via many means. Psychology, Numerology, Astrology, Communicating and many other wonderful means that life has to offer.

Once you know more of yourself with understand your past and finding more what makes you happy in life your self esteem with confidence will grow abundantly. Whether you realize it or not there are many in life whom have gone through and will go through what you have faced.

Your not a freak nor any other similiar term.. your human like the rest of us. With a lot to learn in life and having many opportunities to teach from your own experiences with those of others."

Oh and if your wondering about why I'm posting this stuff on a porn site.. well I do try to look for answers to my questions from any possible source available when observing human behavior...
what better place to observe the range of developmental sexual characteristic etc... and trough that maybe find a piece I require to heal something more of my self away...

"Alike yourself I came here to learn and interact with others where the life of others and myself becomes bettered. As have many come here for similiar and different needs to satisfy. How long I will be herein with the intermittence of my lifes schedules to change in future.. isnt known. But am going to enjoy my time here and especially enjoy the greatness of so many herein this wonderful medium of free speech."

 

[Wolf_Song]

oh and guys sorry if i babble like mojo jojo... but i try to think of as many ways of writing somehitng as possible since it has been known that some people miss the point if i dont repeat my self....
often.

Personally I think you are doing great and sincerely wish you the best in love and life.. you deserve it virginleo20.

 

[Wolf_Song]

Keyser711,

What many are saying to you is not to disrespect your choice of being a virgin. As that is your free choice, which unfortunately many in life havent had that luxury. But your generalizations are insulting to those whom havent had that freedom of choice such as yourself.

To look at a possible scenario is that you may end up shoving such an intolerant judgement in some ones face whom had been raped. Where you hurt some one accidentally by vocalizing this attitude and such wasnt your intent to do so to them. Which is both unfair to you and them both if such should ever happen.

Especially if such actions brought some one to have a flashback of such trauma. Which could lead you to losing some one from your life whom could be a great friend. With as well being able to help you more understand what they have gone through.

You could have even hurt some ones feelings on this thread whom didnt deserve such. Personally I have no animosity nor hatred to yourself. But I do however strongly disagree with your generalizations. With hoping you will learn the error of them from what several herein have shared.

Hearts blessings and best wished to you Keyser711

 

[The GrandMage]

I myself would NEVER have sex with a girl who has had sex previously. After all, like the sneakers, this girl is now dirty. She's been used by someone else and discarded. When you go shopping, do you want to buy the new Nike's, or the old, used, Rebok's??

My God.
I really didn't believe anyone would ever say that.

You fucking prick. 'Dirty'? 'Dirty'? Fuck you and the horse you rode in on. I hope you catch the bubonic plague, you bastard. I hope your dick falls off and you never have sex, because you're one of the dumb bastards that should never procreate.

It's people with your kind of thinking that fucks up the world. "Oh, they're 'dirty'. And my holier-than-thou attitude won't allow me to accept you as a human being without generalizing you."

Fuck off. Abstinance does not make you better than anyone else. You're 'proud' of your virginity? I hope it's because you realize you should never have children, you elitist fuck.

-Notice: The above message was paid for by God, who says you should never judge anyone else, especially without knowing their situation. Have a nice day.