What A Poet Needs?

[twelveoone]

oops, it's getting metaphysical.
It is impossible to write without using fantasy, at least a little. Fantasies don't only say something about the one who writes them but also about the readers irrespective of moral stance adopted on any occasion.

Yes, they should be focused on the poem, assuming this audience is poets. TQ has a modified list poem, that plays to the audience, however it is rather flat. And you are arguing particulars of the list?
What a poet needs is a better sense of organization, presentation. And I tried once.
Yours and his job now.

 

[TOKUQINN]

[QUOTE
Religious experience[/QUOTE]

I think people who need a religious experience must go to church, read bible, be a member of a congregation (not a erotic site ), lead a puritanical life.It is a option to live your life and deserves respect.

TQ.

 

[Magnetron]

Let's just be honest.

http://www.literotica.com/p/sex-in-the-beach

The dude writes some pretty fucked up misogynistic poems; some more than others.

This one about the mermaid fails as fantasy. Fantasy is about experiencing desires via imagination. The scenario of bitchslapping a happy little mermaid is entirely something else.

What this poet needs is a reality Czech
In the form of a hockey player's stick
Upside his Turkish waddling neck
And if I were Ariel
I'd only swim out of my underwater shipwreck
To give him a kick in the balls
With my tail end
God would finned that more appropriate

 

[TOKUQINN]

First I am not Turkish or Muslim.I am coming from a persian and zeroastern family based in Istanbul.My sexual encounters are with females.Some of my best friends are women.I am well groomed and well behaving.They enjoy my company.I am not a woman hater.Most of my poems are non-erotic.I am not documenting my whole life in my poems.As I said before, some of my poems are pure male fantasies.It is easy to detect what is fiction and what is fact.If you don't like the content of my poems.Ignore them.This thread became a trial of my personality.Which is no-ones business on this site.

TQ.

 

[Magnetron]

First I am not Turkish or Muslim.I am coming from a persian and zeroastern family based in Istanbul.My sexual encounters are with females.Some of my best friends are women.I am well groomed and well behaving.They enjoy my company.I am not a woman hater.Most of my poems are non-erotic.I am not documenting my whole life in my poems.As I said before, some of my poems are pure male fantasies.It is easy to detect what is fiction and what is fact.If you don't like the content of my poems.Ignore them.This thread became a trial of my personality.Which is no-ones business on this site.

TQ.

Do yourself a favor before you submit any more poetry or post more of your poems here in the forum; it matters not if it is fact or fiction or who you are in real life or not.

Put more careful thought into how you portray women and how those women are treated in your so-called pure male fantasies.

There is enough offensive drivel being posted in the Literotica forum and it is easily blocked with a push of the IGNORE button.

The more you are IGNORED, the more pointless it will become for you to participate here and the less constructive feedback you will receive on your poems.

If you want to be IGNORED, then by all means continue on the path you are already treading.

 

[butters]

tokuqinn, you are entitled to write whatever you choose. posting that choice on an open forum means you hold it up to our inspection. there may be those few whose tastes match with yours and who might enjoy your posts - but you're more likely to find that kind of readership over on the main submissions part of the forum. here we can be more picky and offer advice or not, depending on what moves us.

if the content of your writes alienate readers, they will speak out. true, it's good practice to comment on the writing not the author, but if your content's controversial then the lines can become blurred.

you look for feedback but i don't think you're going to get the kind you'll accept here.

 

[twelveoone]

Rolls on the fucking floor laughing.
TQ, I got a glimpse of your personality.
Your response to Magnetron:
"I think people who need a religious experience must go to church, read bible, be a member of a congregation (not a erotic site ), lead a puritanical life.It is a option to live your life and deserves respect."
ignores the fact, he said it in a poem, which BTW was much better, and it comes off as moralistic, funny thing, as others this thread did.

In a nutshell: A fantasy is not poetry and you do not seem to realize that. As is there must be at least 20,000 poets (alright, allowing for alt inflation maybe 100) on this site that are better, your best course of action is to start in new poems and realize who is saying what and how. That advice was ignored.
to paraphrase
I think people who want to write poetry, should read poetry, pay attention to what is said about poetry, and generally work their balls (or whatever female equiv.) off. That is an option that is deserving of respect.

Now your Sex In The Beach wasn't that bad, after wading through tons of spankies and whip ass sonnets, it seemed to be rather tame to me. And better than some, of course if you are going to come back and tell me "suck dick" which is a dominance move; it just won't work.

 

[TOKUQINN]

I think editor of this site approves the content.They send rejection slips for anything they don't approve.I suggest again, if you find the content offensive to you, ignore it next time and stop commenting on it.There are other threads.Please don't take it personal.This is my final comment on this thread.My best regards...

TQ.

 

[butters]

...and there you have it

 

[todski28]

No comment....

 

[Magnetron]

I'll just go back to ignoring you like I was after having read the mermaid poem.

This time I will make it official.

p.s. For the three nonpoets that avidly read here, that means his threads will become invisible and I will no longer see anyone else's commentary.

 

[twelveoone]

sexy chicks to date and fuck
the guy wrote a beer commercial
Alright I'll go for expert advice:

Havin' said that this Poem doth Not work for me : this unprotected , drunken sex , multiple partners , possible acid trippin' is actually a Lethal Cocktail tailor-made for the spread of AIDS & i would have happily remained ignorant of this Poem, if Circumstances had been kinder .

yeh, I see the error of my ways

 

[pelegrino]

Let's just be honest.

http://www.literotica.com/p/sex-in-the-beach

The dude writes some pretty fucked up misogynistic poems; some more than others.

This one about the mermaid fails as fantasy. Fantasy is about experiencing desires via imagination. The scenario of bitchslapping a happy little mermaid is entirely something else.

Yes, they should be focused on the poem, assuming this audience is poets. TQ has a modified list poem, that plays to the audience, however it is rather flat. And you are arguing particulars of the list?
What a poet needs is a better sense of organization, presentation. And I tried once.
Yours and his job now.

No, I'm not playing this game. I am also quite unaware of TQ's modified list. In fact I only know this one under discussion and the one that Magnetron used as an example. I did not find them aggressive, and I could not have asked the mermaid if she found the slapping aggressive or she liked it. I liked the last scene where they fuck beside the burning beach hat, but otherwise it was rather flat as a fantasy. How could they be aggressive if they are flat, as you say? If I want to read violent scenes I go for Sad and other maîtres of the genre but I do it not for the violent fantasy (I hate blood and all such stuff), only for the underlying philosophical argumentation.
If TQ's stuff can be taken as aggressive then what the hell are theirs? Yet they are philosophical works on eroticism.
I read to much on him in this thread and too little on his poetry(?) fantasy(?) which obviously everyone else here knows better than me, so I'm learning about him from all of you and I would not be interested in him but in his effort to write (if I had the time, that is).



Edited for further clarification

 

[twelveoone]

No, I'm not playing this game. I am also quite unaware of TQ's modified list. In fact I only know this one under discussion and the one that Magnetron used as an example. I did not find them aggressive, and I could not have asked the mermaid if she find the slapping aggressive or she liked it. I liked the last scene where they fuck beside the burning beach hat, but otherwise it was rather flat as a fantasy. How could they be aggressive if they are flat, as you say? If I want to read violent scenes I go for Sad and other maîtres of the genre but I do it not for the violent fantasy (I hate blood and such stuff), only for the underlying philosophical argumentation.
I read to much on him in this thread and too little on his poetry(?) fantasy(?) which obviously everyone else here knows better than me, so I'm learning about him from all of you and I would not be interested in him but in his effort to write (if I had the time, that is).

what a poet needs
is a modified list poem i.e

what a poet needs is a sexy chick to date and fuck
what a poet needs is better luck
what a poet needs is roofies by the truck
self administered to get out all this poet stuff

Personally I don't think he likes me, I don't think Magnetron likes him, UYS thinks women are fuckable, Tsotha has a gun and butters is throwing peanuts, somehow Ash started it. Or Trix did. Otherwise much ado about do do.
I plead the fifth. You have no witnesses.

 

[Tsotha]

Personally I don't think he likes me, I don't think Magnetron likes him, UYS thinks women are fuckable, Tsotha has a gun and butters is throwing peanuts, somehow Ash started it. Or Trix did. Otherwise much ado about do do.

I don't have a gun.

 

[twelveoone]

I don't have a gun.

I didn't see a thing. Even the three non-poets Mag refereed?

 

[twelveoone]

NO woman is just a fuck whoever he was referring to!

...to date and fuck
...to date and fuck
...to date and fuck

I think he got the general order and socially acceptable...and probably after bowling

 

[twelveoone]

Let's just be honest.

http://www.literotica.com/p/sex-in-the-beach

The dude writes some pretty fucked up misogynistic poems; some more than others.

This one about the mermaid fails as fantasy. Fantasy is about experiencing desires via imagination. The scenario of bitchslapping a happy little mermaid is entirely something else.

What this poet needs is a reality Czech
In the form of a hockey player's stick
Upside his Turkish waddling neck
And if I were Ariel
I'd only swim out of my underwater shipwreck
To give him a kick in the balls
With my tail end
God would finned that more appropriate

the dude writes some poor poetry...but you are delving into the theater of the absurd

 

[bflagsst]

A big home with a pool and bowling alley in it
care takers
long sleeps
unending supplies of smoke and booze
a study, stacked nice and neat
solitude
juicy burgers, pizza slices, steak and wine
premium coffee shops
quality porn
good clothes, nice shoes
excellent health care
financial security, lots of money
shopping sprees
sexy chicks to date and fuck
frequent vacations
lots of sunshine near ocean
no jobs, idling all the time
good poems from other poets
sexy art shows
publishing parties
with good looking room fillers
tons of humor and laughter.

TOKUQINN

Using 'sexy' twice irritated me, but it's pretty much better than 3/4 of Peter Orlovsky's known poetic output, better than half of bukowski and it's the sort of poem that one wouldn't think twice about if it were included in the collected Ginsberg. It reads like a Beat revival poem as written in 1993. I don't even hate it.

 

[twelveoone]

Using 'sexy' twice irritated me, but it's pretty much better than 3/4 of Peter Orlovsky's known poetic output, better than half of bukowski and it's the sort of poem that one wouldn't think twice about if it were included in the collected Ginsberg. It reads like a Beat revival poem as written in 1993. I don't even hate it.

which half of bukowski?

 

[bflagsst]

which half of bukowski?

The Pleasures of the Damned: Poems, 1951-1993; so pages 300+.

Which of Orlovsky's 4 poems do you believe I believe is superior to What a Poet Needs?

 

[twelveoone]

The Pleasures of the Damned: Poems, 1951-1993; so pages 300+.

Which of Orlovsky's 4 poems do you believe I believe is superior to What a Poet Needs?

...and to think I get slammed for reading crap

 

[twelveoone]

(what a poet needs)
is a lucky watch
and more cowbell

 

[pensivepoet]

I have the gun.
And pretty sure i'm the second of the three non poets.

 

[pensivepoet]

Oh, and what the fuck
Toq, i thought your poem read as hugh hefner's 9th grade wish list, but i thought the attacks on your choice of context were bullshit.
And by you explaining, defending, then taking your marbles home~well, let's just say you fell halfway down the ladder.
And no, i have no fukken idea what that means, so don't ask.