Who Cares Who Wins (alternative AH awards)

[Guest]

any chance of me winning anything?

All you had to do was show up, El.

Perdita

 

[English Lady]

All you had to do was show up, El.

Perdita

Aww no wonder I love you Perdita!

 

[mtnman2003]

I attend AH irregularly.......

Thanks Perdita........

I thought of that when I typed it, but let it go! Should not give wordsmiths an inch......... they take more!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you as well!!!!

Enjoy the jaunt over the pond!!

Mtn

 

[Amy Sweet]

But you've already out-posted me...what am I doing wrong?!? Why is everyone trouncing me on post count?

Probably sleeping.

That and working (vs, sneaking on lit on office hours- maybe you don't have access to a computer from your work place?), associating with friends and or family, eating away anything but 1 handed sammich's, going out and breathing fresh air, turning off your computer now and then, stuff like that...


What is wrong with you girl?!

 

[Amy Sweet]

I sure hope I qualify for something

Was there a 'most obnoxious sigline?'

What happens to the poor saps who miss out on *both* awards? Won't they feel even worse than the 1st time around?

 

[cookiejar]

Best Knockers in a small space?

Lol...I love this one. EL has this by a tit.

 

[BlackShanglan]

But you've already out-posted me...what am I doing wrong?!? Why is everyone trouncing me on post count?

Only posting when you have something articulate to say? That's a killer. I never let it slow me down.

Shanglan

 

[gauchecritic]

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Welcome back. After many seconds of intense, mind-numbing, back-breaking effort our team of experts have sifted and sorted through almost 2 PMs that they received nominating names and naming nominates.

Some of the categories for prizes have sadly, been dropped, others, excitingly, added in an effort to entertain us all and every one, so without further ado here are the ads:

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And now ladies and gentlemen, without further ado here are the nominations For this year's W.A.N.K.E.R.S Awards.


In the Contributors section we have a total of <insert number here> nominations and these are they:

The Most Miserable Get category is headed by your host Gauchecritic followed closely by Lewd and CarsonShepherd.

Unfortunately the Most Delusional award was stolen and shared out piecemeal in a secret ceremony, yesterday.

Lots of nominations were received for Biggest Poseur and our judges whittled the list down to Gauchecritic, CarsonShepherd, Lewd, Dranoel and a surprisingly strong latecomer Amicus

Due to a typographical error Yui took the award outright for Roundest eyes

Archest personality this year has but two nominations Svenskaflicka and Sincerely_Helene.

Moving on to one of the most coveted awards Purest wit in the first instance there was only ever going to be one contender but other nominations were in fact posted and remained mysteriously intact when a raging inferno roared through my PM box late last night destroying almost everything else so here are those nominations: Gauchecritic, Mlle delaPlumeBleu and TheEarl

Funniest personal signature that rhymes with moot was wholly uncontested and goes nem. con. to: Zoot.

The award for Wittiest Pure was withdrawn at the last moment due to an unfortunate chain of circumstances with a tragi-comic ending, which is far too droll for such an august occasion.

The Most irregular AHer award went, by sheer maths, to Mtnman

Best ChilledVodka (four nominations) Those nominations are: ChilledVodka, ChilledVodkaII, ChilledVodkaIV and, rather surprisingly, SubJoe

Excellentest AHer whose name begins with Doctor and ends with Mabeus. Unsurprisingly and rather obviously this award goes to Weird Harold

Extra categories in this section with nominees are as follows:

Cutest Canine Associated Poster Snoopy, Cant, Lewd and Gauchecritic

Most Yorkshire AHer Just-Legal, Gauchecritic, Fifty5 and Scheherezade


And now onto the thread nominations

Feeblest excuse for a thread (nominations include this one) The judges were inundated with nominations for this award and could find no way to reduce the list and so all threads that included pissing, poultry and pissing on poultry share this award equally. (and any practical joke threads)

Most excruciatingly, painfully dull thread Whilst attempting to plow through these nominees two of the judges suffered cerebral infarctions, one a cardiac arrest and another; terminal leprosy so this award was deleted from the list.

Best hijack Two nominees for this category: The Amicus Hijack and my personal favourite not technically a hijack butA thread stopper by CV IV


Whilst many nominations were received for the Astronomy section, the judges decided that it didn't really have anything to do with Lit

And so a brand new third section has been created and these are the categories and nominees for whom you may vote:

TEA

Best Cup Of Tea Matriarch, Perdita, Gauchecritic, Lew

Funniest Monika which includes a T Gauchecritic, Cantdog, TheEarl, Louise out of Eternal

Happiest AHer from the Tees Winner by default Alex de Kok

Sweetest cup of Tea Sweet-n-Petite, Amy Sweet, WildSweetOne, Bandstand by Family

I pity the fool who messes with... TateLou, Pops, Joe, SubJoe, Joseph and the amazing technicolour dreamcoat



So here they are once again lames and gentiles, Pm your votes to me please, before Wednesday midnight (gmt) on the following:

Most Miserable Get Gauchecritic, Lewd, CarsonShepherd.

Biggest Poseur Gauchecritic, CarsonShepherd, Lewd, Dranoel, Amicus

Archest personality Svenskaflicka, Sincerely_Helene.

Purest wit Gauchecritic, Mlle delaPlumeBleu, TheEarl

Best ChilledVodka (four nominations) ChilledVodka, ChilledVodkaII, ChilledVodkaIV, SubJoe

Cutest Canine Associated Poster Snoopy, Cant, Lewd and Gauchecritic

Most Yorkshire AHer Just-Legal, Gauchecritic, Fifty5 and Scheherezade


Thread nominations

Best hijack The Amicus Hijack and my personal favourite not technically a hijack butA thread stopper by CV IV


TEA

Best Cup Of Tea Matriarch, Perdita, Gauchecritic, Lew

Funniest Monika which includes a T Gauchecritic, Cantdog, TheEarl, Louise out of Eternal

Sweetest cup of Tea Sweet-n-Petite, Amy Sweet, WildSweetOne, Bandstand by Family

I pity the fool who messes with... TateLou, Pops, Joe, SubJoe, Joseph and the amazing technicolour dreamcoat


Ladies and gentlemen, the vote is in your hands. ey thenkyew.

 

[Guest]

Oh, this IS fun!!!

 

[yui]

Re: Re: Who Cares Who Wins (alternative AH awards)

Ladies and gentlemen, alpacas, horses and goslings, assorted trolls and uber-rechts, the nominations are in, the caste are dyed and the voting will begin shortly. But first, a word from our sponsor: Taichobrae.


Tired? Stressed? Tense? Then you need SPUNK! and not just any old spunk but SPUNK! with added exclamation.
Juiced out? Jizzed off? goo-less? You need SPUNK!
Containing valuable minerals, and anti ageing agents like cologen, oestrogen and hydrocortizone SPUNK! is available from your local male, without prescription.
Now in new Strawberry flavour!!


Due to a typographical error Yui took the award outright for Roundest eyes

http://img.villagephotos.com/p/2004-8/805074/fruits_trio1.jpg

 

[BlackShanglan]

But where is yui's award for Most Insanely Cute Bouncing Kissing Hat-Wearing Little Duck with Antennae Thing?

Shanglan

 

[minsue]

What happens to the poor saps who miss out on *both* awards? Won't they feel even worse than the 1st time around?

Yes.

 

[rikaaim]

I'm not even noticed around here it seems. Maybe that's for the best.

 

[minsue]

I'm not even noticed around here it seems. Maybe that's for the best.

Sweetie, you've been here for 2 weeks. Patience.

You don't get to bitch until you've been here at least a year and get no nominations.

 

[rikaaim]

Sweetie, you've been here for 2 weeks. Patience.

You don't get to bitch until you've been here at least a year and get no nominations.

I honestly think no nominations is good nominations. (in this case at least) Besides, my annoying self shall be here for a long while.

 

[carsonshepherd]

I was gonna nominate myself for biggest poseur. But I was too lazy. And now I'm a little pissed that other people did.



I like the sound of most miserable get though. Everyone vote for me! (Preferably for Most Magically Delicious. Or else I'm coming after your Lucky Charms.)

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

I'm going to nominate myself for the procrastination award tomorrow, or maybe the day after.

 

[Evil Alpaca]

Is it too late to nominate myself for biggest procrastinator? How about most apathetic?
Ah, who gives damn.

 

[carsonshepherd]

What's the difference between ignorance and apathy?

I don't know and I don't care.

 

[rikaaim]

What's the difference between ignorance and apathy?

I don't know and I don't care.

Hey, whatever man. Just...like... you know...whatever. Deal. Something like that I think. I don't know.

 

[The_Fool]

I want to write myself in for Biggest Poseur...If I can figure out what one is....

My version of a Poseur

 

[minsue]

I want to write myself in for Biggest Poseur...If I can figure out what one is....

My version of a Poseur

What's that word I'm looking for again...? Oh, that's right - DAYUM!

 

[Evil Alpaca]

What's that word I'm looking for again...? Oh, that's right - DAYUM!

Hey Min, we should have a barnyard awards or sumthin' . . . humanoids need not apply.

 

[minsue]

Hey Min, we should have a barnyard awards or sumthin' . . . humanoids need not apply.

ROFL

Works for me!

 

[rikaaim]

ROFL

Works for me!

How about biggest mess left by barnyard animal?