Worst Movies

[Rumple Foreskin]

I'm a bit jealous that you even got to see it. I'd heard how awful it was, and rather wanted to watch it just to see how bad it could get. Alas, they pulled it so quickly I never had the chance.

Shanglan

Don't be jealous, be relieved.

My wife and I were in San Antonio at a writer's conference and had a few hours to kill before catching a flight to Dallas. We hadn't heard of the film, but with the cast: Warren Beatty, Diane Keaton, Gary Shandling, Goldie Hawn, we figured how bad could it be?

Turns out the answer was, very. The Yahoo movie site had this to say about the movie and it's director: Peter Chelsom may well be the man behind one of the biggest box-office flops of all time (the notoriously plagued Town and Country [1999]),

Rumple Foreskin

 

[Halo_n_horns]

Well, I've been the oddball in a couple of other threads ... might as well stay consistant ...

I actually like bad movies. They've ended up being some of the best times I've got to have for one reason or another.

As far as movies that really got on my nerves? Last of the Mohicans and The Horse Whisperer pissed me off pretty good. Both had very little to do with their titles. The Horse Whisperer ended up being some sappy love story, and The Last of the Mohicans wasn't actually about the last of the Mohicans. It was about the last white guy that was raised by the last of the Mohicans, and his quest for a piece of ass outside the tribe.

Now those were BAD movies.

 

[yui]

As far as movies that really got on my nerves? Last of the Mohicans and The Horse Whisperer pissed me off pretty good.

The Last of the Mohicans wasn't actually about the last of the Mohicans. It was about the last white guy that was raised by the last of the Mohicans, and his quest for a piece of ass outside the tribe.

Now those were BAD movies.

Um, the book was about Hawkeye. Sort of like the movie was, eh?

 

[SonOfAGhost]

To me a bad movie has to fail to be what it was intended. So campy movies like Shaolin Soccer, Attack of the Killer Tomatoes (indeed all movies by John De Bello) or Plan 9, may not be good movies, much less art, but they're not bad either. Rather they are what they are, light entertainment best watched while short on sleep and after a beverage or two

Most of what comes out of Hollywood these days are bad movies. Like anything with non-actors like Rosie O'Donell, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Rosanne, Kevin Costner, Shelly Long and Tom Hanks. Hey those last 2 were both in Money Pit, coincidence? It boggles the mind that so many people flock to LA every year to get into show business but the studios keep sending us the same clowns that can only play characters that are pretty much exactly who they are in real life. There's a reason Tom Cruise's characters have been sniveling assholes in every movie he's ever done

Even so, Hollywood occaisionally manages to out do themselves. Perhaps they hope a more spectacular disaster will distract from how pathetic the bulk of their product is

St. Elmo's Fire was the first such movie I saw but there are now so many. The sequels to Look Who's Talking.
Speaking of John Travolta, let's not forget Battlefield Earth.
Fire Birds with Nicholas Cage as an Apache pilot, was intended to be the army's answer to Top Gun's success as a recruiting tool, let's just say nobody rushed to find a recruiter.
Most SNL spinoff movies, with the notable exception of Blues Brothers, a 2 minute bit does not convert well to a 2 hour movie.
Spice World, never actually saw the movie, got more than my fill just from the commercials for it
Alive.
The Phantom Menace.
Sequels to Batman.
What About Bob?

 

[cloudy]

Um, the book was about Hawkeye. Sort of like the movie was, eh?

Imagine that.

I liked it. Daniel Day Lewis is hot, what can I say?

 

[BlackShanglan]

Imagine that.

I liked it. Daniel Day Lewis is hot, what can I say?

Plus it inevitably reminds me of Samuel Clemens/Mark Twain's essay "The Literary Offenses of Fenimoore Cooper," so after I enjoy the drama I can spend the rest of the day snickering and muttering "all the laws of nature must stand in abeyance when Cooper wants to get up a delicate job of woodcraft!"

I find Alice's death very moving - her quiet, almost dreaming determination that causes even Magua to pity her a moment and motion her to come back.

Shanglan

 

[Halo_n_horns]

Um, the book was about Hawkeye. Sort of like the movie was, eh?

The white guy should have been a sub-plot in the storyline at best. It was called The Last of the Mohicans, and Lewis's character was NOT truly the last of the Mohicans.

 

[BlackShanglan]

The white guy should have been a sub-plot in the storyline at best. It was called The Last of the Mohicans, and Lewis's character was NOT truly the last of the Mohicans.

Yes, he was. The author is counting it by culture and not by blood.

 

[Halo_n_horns]

Yes, he was. The author is counting it by culture and not by blood.

And had I read the book I would've been disappointed by that also. The blood is true, not the skin color.

I would suspect that he took a more compromised route and simply wrote what he believed would be an easier sell to a broader audience than a story that was actually about a true native American. The white guy made the whole thing so much more ... hhmmm ... commercially appealing?

By the way, this is all getting very off topic.

 

[cloudy]

And had I read the book I would've been disappointed by that also. The blood is true, not the skin color.

I would suspect that he took a more compromised route and simply wrote what he believed would be an easier sell to a broader audience than a story that was actually about a true native American. The white guy made the whole thing so much more ... hhmmm ... commercially appealing?

By the way, this is all getting very off topic.

off topic, but just have to add - it's not blood, it's culture. Lots of white folks were adopted over the years, and to us, they're just as much a part of the culture as anyone that's there by blood.

Just an aside.

and there are still Mohicans around, too...

 

[kinky shy girl]

Mr and Mrs Smith -crap, crap, boooooring crap-switched off after 15 mins.

Not the greatest flick, but the eye candy made it worthwhile for me.

I submit "The Assasination of Richard Nixon." i don't mind Sean Penn, but I hated this movie.

 

[Alex756]

"Moulin Rouge" was awful.

I've seen a lot of movies that sucked
but this one in particular sticks in my mind.
Of course, that is only my opinion.
.

I have never run into another person who disliked this movie.

TO me, this is the WORST movie ever. The acting, the sets, the music, and most importantly the filming.

I did not just leave this movie early, I left, threw up it made me so motion sick, watched old people walk around a strip mall for an hour and a half THEN drove my friends home who decided to stay for the whole thing.

That is the ONLY movie I have not sat through. I will watch just about anything, and can find redeaming features of everything from Drunken Master 2, to Legally Blonde. Moulan Rouge is the ONLY movie to ever cause this intense dislike.

~Alex

 

[Halo_n_horns]

off topic, but just have to add - it's not blood, it's culture. Lots of white folks were adopted over the years, and to us, they're just as much a part of the culture as anyone that's there by blood.

Just an aside.

There's a lot of woulda, coulda, shouldas in that. But to you on this matter I happily relent.

Transylvania 6-5000. I'm a horror movie nut and this should never have gone to script!!!

 

[yui]

The white guy should have been a sub-plot in the storyline at best. It was called The Last of the Mohicans, and Lewis's character was NOT truly the last of the Mohicans.

I was just pointing out that the movie was based on Lewis's book; Shang and Cloudy have hit your other points so well I have absolutely nothing of consequence to add.

Worst Movies:

"Against All Odds" - Great song. Lots pretty people having gratuitous sex, but the most boring movie I have ever seen in my life.

"Dead Ringers" – The movie makes me feel sick to my stomach. Blech.

 

[Halo_n_horns]

Worst Movies:

"Against All Odds" - Great song. Lots pretty people having gratuitous sex, but the most boring movie I have ever seen in my life.

"Dead Ringers" – The movie makes me feel sick to my stomach. Blech.

I forgot about Dead Ringers... *bringing up my NetFlix Q and adding it in *

Beastmaster. The ferrets were cute. The movie was rancid.