You can't? Fuck you!

[intothewoods]

If an insect-squeamish woman sees a spider, jumps and pulls up her hand, and I tell her to put her hand back on the railing and hold it there, which she does, and the spider slowly approaches and crawls up over her knuckles..... I'm not laughing. I think that's hot, in a commitment-validating and sadist-satisfying kind of way.

It's not about a spider fetish or a need to assert the joke's on her. It's about overcoming an individual's resistance, in ways large and small. It's about control, and what I can get her to do or endure solely 'cause I want her to. Yes, it feeds my ego, but with the right kind of person it also tightens the bond.

But you're right, I'm not a sophisticated mindfuck player. Not a deep dark side, mental or physical, edge player either. I've said this before, and I'll say it again. Someone who seeks those things would bored out of her mind with a guy like me.

Oh - and you're also right about Marquis. The nipple tale was smokin'!

bad bad very bad

I think I'm even less sophisticated. Nothing says I love you like emptying the catbox so I can work 15 more minutes.

Ohhhhhhhh God yes. That is seriously true love.

 

[EmpressFi]

If an insect-squeamish woman sees a spider, jumps and pulls up her hand, and I tell her to put her hand back on the railing and hold it there, which she does, and the spider slowly approaches and crawls up over her knuckles..... I'm not laughing. I think that's hot, in a commitment-validating and sadist-satisfying kind of way.

This would not tighten our bond as I'd probably need therapy or at least sedatives when we were finished. I'm not even sure I could put my hand back.

I would be at war with wanting to trust you'd never do something to harm me.. and with the knowledge that the spider is probably determined to harm me.. and that the mental damage of letting it walk on me.. WOULD harm me..

 

[Netzach]

I'd probably change the lock by seven and have a jar of spiders parked outside with his stuff. I'm pretty spider compatible, too, it's just very "you are my science project" in a way that I'm not compatible with. If you want me to stretch myself and trust you it has to be over something much more important in my personal inventory, mentally, than an arachnid.

 

[BiBunny]

I'd probably change the lock by seven and have a jar of spiders parked outside with his stuff. I'm pretty spider compatible, too, it's just very "you are my science project" in a way that I'm not compatible with. If you want me to stretch myself and trust you it has to be over something much more important in my personal inventory, mentally, than an arachnid.

You totally beat me to saying that. If you want me to continue saying, "How high?" when you say, "Jump," then, by God, there'd better be a damn good reason to jump.

 

[Homburg]

I'm not a psychoanalyst, psychologist, therapist, etc. Thus I won't fuck with phobias.

Her: "EEEEK!! A SPIDER!"
Me: "I got it, baby."

It takes a lot of time and investment to build trust, and only seconds to tear it down.

 

[Etoile]

You totally beat me to saying that. If you want me to continue saying, "How high?" when you say, "Jump," then, by God, there'd better be a damn good reason to jump.

I like the way you phrased this - if you want me to continue saying. It emphasizes that one incident of ending up looking silly may be acceptable, but if you are constantly going to play fucktard with me, that's where we need to have a talk.

 

[Etoile]

It takes a lot of time and investment to build trust, and only seconds to tear it down.

I needed to have that tattooed on my forehead a few times in the now-distant past.

 

[ammre]

I like the way you phrased this - if you want me to continue saying. It emphasizes that one incident of ending up looking silly may be acceptable, but if you are constantly going to play fucktard with me, that's where we need to have a talk.

indeed!



oh and manhole is a funny word when said too many times or slowly...

manhole... man hole... m a n h o l e.

 

[ammre]

and on the phobia note, I don't have a lot of phobias, I would have to say the supernatural (if it exists or the though of it existing) and sometimes the dark, but i kinda find it hot to think about being able to sub so much that I'd sit in a pitch black woods with strange noises and stuff... I mean it wouldn't be fun, but i'm kinda all about pushing myself

 

[ataxia.girl]

If an insect-squeamish woman sees a spider, jumps and pulls up her hand, and I tell her to put her hand back on the railing and hold it there, which she does, and the spider slowly approaches and crawls up over her knuckles..... I'm not laughing. I think that's hot, in a commitment-validating and sadist-satisfying kind of way.

This is pretty hot. i find it very hot when a Top is willing to take the risk to tell me to do something they aren't sure i will. Not when they tell me to do stupid stuff there is no way in hell i would ever consider doing but when they are willing to risk asking for the really borderline stuff. You've spent all that time building trust; taking little baby steps. i like it when a Top will go out on a limb and ask me to doing something difficult. i feel like both parties take a risk at those times.

If you tell her to stop and keep her hand there and she doesn't but you truly feel she could you lose something; the illusion she was yours to begin with i guess. If you ask her to do something she shouldn't and she does anyway well things can break there too.

 

[MasterPhoenix]

The most famous of these questions being, "Why are manhole covers round?"

Marquis, I have an interview for a promotion coming up, and becuase of this post... I keep expecting THAT question

 

[twysted73]

Marquis, I have an interview for a promotion coming up, and becuase of this post... I keep expecting THAT question

The most common answer is simply that a round manhole cover can't fall into the hole it covers. But I did tell you that there's more than one answer. Heavy, round manhole covers are easier for one person to move by standing it on end and rolling. Also, you don't have to "align" a manhole cover to it's hole. Any orientation will do.

It's a way to get a sense for an interview candidate's ability to think on his or her feet outside of their area of expertise. The way the candidate approaches the problem, thinks of and presents potential solutions, defends them, or discards them are all relevant to the interviewer.

It's a simple question. There are simple answers. But the great not-so-secret about these types of questions that everyone seems to miss is that it's not about the answer! The interviewer cares much more about how you arrive a whatever answer you get than what that answer is. Are you thinking logically? Is there method or madness to the solutions you consider, accept, and discard? Are you even willing to entertain such an absurd question?

As answered here: http://ask-leo.com/so_just_why_are_manhole_covers_round.html

My result? I'm lazy yet thorough and resourceful

 

[intothewoods]

As to the spider thing, I think it's hot, but I also get that I doubt he would throw a tarantula, or anything poisonous. It's all about knowing your pyl, and what would be tolerable.

There are phobias, and there are phobios. If the pyl is going to be carted away by the men in white coats after a scene, it's probably negates the hotness factor.

 

[EmpressFi]

As to the spider thing, I think it's hot, but I also get that I doubt he would throw a tarantula, or anything poisonous. It's all about knowing your pyl, and what would be tolerable.

There are phobias, and there are phobios. If the pyl is going to be carted away by the men in white coats after a scene, it's probably negates the hotness factor.

yeah.. I couldnt picture the hotness factor in Master having to coax me out of a fetal position