Any Oscar winning Fake orgasm performers in the house [ ladies ]

[karndav]

I did have orgasms before all this. Maybe not 100% of the time but i would say at least 80-90% but I didn't fake it then.

When people say we weren't communicating they are probably right but are sex life was very good. At least i thought so. We made love 4-6 times a week and I thought i was pretty open to what he suggested. Outside of the bedroom the only major thing I thought we had trouble communicating about was our oldest son who is bi-polar. he is very frustrating and is a constant source off tension in our lives. The platonic friend he made over the internet and called all the time he said was the one person he could vent to. As it turned out her ex-husband (husband at the time) is also bi-polar so they had alot in common in the beginning of the relationship and from there the relationship just took off. I have told him it was not the friendship I opposed so much as the secrecy. Didn't he trust me that i would want him to have somenone to confide in? i have friends, he could have friends too. But he kept it a secret for four years. As for the phone sex and the cybering, if everything was ok in the bedroom as he says the why did he do it? i just can't seem to wrap my head around this?

As to why I chose karndav for a lit name, my husband has been coming to this site for a long time reading the stories. When I picked the name I picked one that reflected both of us so we could both post, individually or together. I have told him I have been posting but so far he has not been to the boards at all.

 

[ewopper]

I fake all the time. I haven't had many orgasms since i found out my husband was chatting and having phone sex without me knowing about it. Also found out he has had a female friend for four years (completely platonic) that I had no clue about.) They have become best friends although theylive 400 miles apart although they did meet once while my husband was traveling. This whole thing came as a complete surprise to me and devastated me but I am bouncing back and dealing with it. But I am still faking it at this point so I guess I am not dealing with it as well I think I am.

I'm sorry to hear that lady and I wish you all the best, the only thinbng I can tell you is you have to try to heal your mind and try not to hold back when a woman holds back i think she cheats herself as well as her partner... anyway
best of the best towards your future

 

[collegeteenm19]

When I was at frosh week last year for my university we had dr. sue johansen the sex lady come and speak to us. she let us in on quite a lot of information and was so comfortable talking about sex that everyone was very mature because she was so professional about it. One thing that she said that I think was very important is that one of the worst things you can do to your partner is fake an orgasm because if they find out it could be absolutely devastating that you would like to them in the most intimate of settings. I really hope that a woman never fakes an orgasm with me, id rather she be completely honest than lie. afterall if she didnt orgasm then we can work together on trying to make it happen the next time. But I would be horrified to find out that my girlfriend was faking orgasms. You have to be honest with your partner, at least thats what I believe

 

[Casey811]

When I was at frosh week last year for my university we had dr. sue johansen the sex lady come and speak to us. she let us in on quite a lot of information and was so comfortable talking about sex that everyone was very mature because she was so professional about it. One thing that she said that I think was very important is that one of the worst things you can do to your partner is fake an orgasm because if they find out it could be absolutely devastating that you would like to them in the most intimate of settings. I really hope that a woman never fakes an orgasm with me, id rather she be completely honest than lie. afterall if she didnt orgasm then we can work together on trying to make it happen the next time. But I would be horrified to find out that my girlfriend was faking orgasms. You have to be honest with your partner, at least thats what I believe

You do understand that some women are incapable of having orgasms?
Or can only have then through self stimulation?

I'd rather have a liar making noise than an honest mute.

 

[HotKittySpank]

Every single one of us. Can you tell the diff?

Wait a second, I can honestly say that I never have faked one. I swear this on the lives of my children so you know I'm not lying. If I can't get there or more like he can't get me there then forget it. I want him to know the truth. I'm not interested in lying to my lover. Sorry, sad but true.

 

[HotKittySpank]

"Obviously he's not getting what he needed at home"... well, isn't that the common excuse for most men who cheat?

I think most men cheat because that's the way they are programmed. Spread the seed and all. It's not personal, it's power and reproductive drive.

I think women can't help cheating as well. I just think that they cheat for different reasons.

I'm not saying that everyone cheats but, I know we all think about it. Some of us just follow through.

I also think it is interesting that some consider phone sex cheating while others require solid contact. What makes it cheating is that he didn't get permission from you first. I have a fairly open relationship that allows lots of things others would consider cheating.

 

[LadyFunkenstein]

Faking it sucks. I used to do it in my early twenties. The better the performance, the worse off you are in the long run.

My then boyfriends thought they were getting me off, and didn't deviate from what they thought worked! (And why should they?) And being young, I didn't have the courage to speak up after the fact.

I can see the occasional I am tired and just want to go to sleep but he wants to "get the job done" so I'll pretend thing. But I say keep it to a minimum.

 

[LadyFunkenstein]

You do understand that some women are incapable of having orgasms?
Or can only have then through self stimulation?

I'd rather have a liar making noise than an honest mute.

If you really believe this to be the case with a partner, why not integrate masturbation into your sexual encounters. For instance, you can do her from behind while she works her own clit. Or she can wear a rabbit vibe while you fuck her.

Your wanting her to pretend to have an orgasm time for your sole benefit is quite lame.

 

[Casey811]

If you really believe this to be the case with a partner, why not integrate masturbation into your sexual encounters. For instance, you can do her from behind while she works her own clit. Or she can wear a rabbit vibe while you fuck her.

Your wanting her to pretend to have an orgasm time for your sole benefit is quite lame.

I'm assuming you skipped the first question of my post so I'll forgive you.

"Some women are incapable of having orgasms"

Now I know that's not the case on Lit where all the girls are sexual dynamos who can have 70 orgasms in 5 minutes but in the real world, yes, there *are* women like this.

So in other words, for these women, you'd rather them lie motionless and be "true" to herself than maybe be a tad vocal for her partners enjoyment?
Do you have any women friends incapable of orgasms? Guess what? I do! She tells me she "fakes" it so she can feel normal.

Also, if you don't know the definition of "tongue in cheek"... Oh well.

 

[ewopper]

Faking it sucks. I used to do it in my early twenties. The better the performance, the worse off you are in the long run.

My then boyfriends thought they were getting me off, and didn't deviate from what they thought worked! (And why should they?) And being young, I didn't have the courage to speak up after the fact.

I can see the occasional I am tired and just want to go to sleep but he wants to "get the job done" so I'll pretend thing. But I say keep it to a minimum.

I'm thinking you need to start a thread on the things you are proud of lol

 

[HotKittySpank]

"Some women are incapable of having orgasms"

Now I know that's not the case on Lit where all the girls are sexual dynamos who can have 70 orgasms in 5 minutes but in the real world, yes, there *are* women like this.

Ok, i'll fess up. I have only had about three orgasms with penetration only. I need my clit to be involved in the party or it does absolutely nothing for me. I have 'my little friend' (vibrator), as I call it, do the manual stimulation while the hubby is getting his jollys as well.

I use to think that I was broken or something. I felt terrible telling men that I can't acheive orgasm by just them pumping in and out of me. But, I told them anyway because I wanted an orgasm too. They have always obliged and we could both be happy and satisfied that way.

I have since been told by several doctors that I am more normal than most. Horray for that!

 

[Casey811]

Ok, i'll fess up. I have only had about three orgasms with penetration only. I need my clit to be involved in the party or it does absolutely nothing for me. I have 'my little friend' (vibrator), as I call it, do the manual stimulation while the hubby is getting his jollys as well.

I use to think that I was broken or something. I felt terrible telling men that I can't acheive orgasm by just them pumping in and out of me. But, I told them anyway because I wanted an orgasm too. They have always obliged and we could both be happy and satisfied that way.

I have since been told by several doctors that I am more normal than most. Horray for that!

See, but you *can* have an orgasm.

I'm talking about the women that simply cannot, through penetration nor clitoral stimuli.

And honestly, I'd say a majority of women are like you and can only orgasm through the clitoris. You ARE normal

 

[naughtygirl69s]

See, but you *can* have an orgasm.

I'm talking about the women that simply cannot, through penetration nor clitoral stimuli.

And honestly, I'd say a majority of women are like you and can only orgasm through the clitoris. You ARE normal

Very true...

I watched a tv program about a new device for women who CANNOT achieve orgasm at all, it's implanted into the back, much like an epidural and it somehow stimulates the nerves to give a woman an orgasm, it worked on 2 of them but one woman still could not....very sad

 

[LadyFunkenstein]

I'm assuming you skipped the first question of my post so I'll forgive you.

"Some women are incapable of having orgasms"

Now I know that's not the case on Lit where all the girls are sexual dynamos who can have 70 orgasms in 5 minutes but in the real world, yes, there *are* women like this.

So in other words, for these women, you'd rather them lie motionless and be "true" to herself than maybe be a tad vocal for her partners enjoyment?
Do you have any women friends incapable of orgasms? Guess what? I do! She tells me she "fakes" it so she can feel normal.

Also, if you don't know the definition of "tongue in cheek"... Oh well.

I skipped intentionally becauseI think it is quite unusual, in terms of actually physically being unable. (And I didn't want to chance saying something nasty.) The majority have mental hangups. If I had a nickel for every woman I have ever heard say, "I never masturbate" I'd be wealthy. And they wonder why they can't have an orgasm.

I don't buy it.

Clitoral only. Very common. Personally I can count on one had the number of times I had an orgasm strictly via good ole PIV sex with no extra help.

Physically can't ever? Rare.

 

[Eilan]

Now I know that's not the case on Lit where all the girls are sexual dynamos who can have 70 orgasms in 5 minutes but in the real world, yes, there *are* women like this.

Oh, please. I can have at least 75 orgasms in five minutes.

 

[LadyFunkenstein]

"Some women are incapable of having orgasms"

Thought I'd provide you with backup for my opinion.

From the National Institutes of Health, which is of course a part of the US Department of Health & Human Services:

Orgasmic dysfunction is an inhibition of the orgasmic phase of the sexual response cycle. The condition is referred to as primary when the female has never experienced orgasm through any means of stimulation. The problem is called secondary if the woman has attained orgasm in the past but is currently nonorgasmic.

CAUSES, INCIDENCE, AND RISK FACTORS

Primary orgasmic dysfunction, wherein the woman has never experienced an orgasm, appears to characterize about 10% to 15% of women. Surveys generally suggest that somewhere between 33% to 50% of women experience orgasm infrequently and are dissatisfied with how often they reach orgasm.

Performance anxiety is believed to be the most common cause of orgasm problems, and 90% or more of orgasm problems appear to be psychological in nature.

PREVENTION

Education about sexual stimulation and response, and healthy attitudes toward sex tend to minimize problems. The principle of taking responsibility for one's own sexual pleasure is also vitally important.

TREATMENT

Treatment through education about the principles cited above has been found to be helpful. In the treatment of primary anorgasmia, the initial objective is to be able to obtain an orgasm under any circumstances.

Most women require clitoral stimulation to reach an orgasm. Incorporating this into sexual activity may be all that is necessary. If orgasm difficulties persist, individual teaching of masturbation when the partner is not present (to exert an inhibiting influence) may help the woman understand what she requires for excitation.

EXPECTATIONS (PROGNOSIS)

Success rates when orgasmic dysfunction is treated by specialists in sex therapy usually are in the range of 65% to 85%. In primary orgasmic dysfunction, treatment is usually successful in 75% to 90% of cases.

A positive prognosis (probable outcome) is usually associated with being younger, emotionally healthy, and having a loving, affectionate relationship with a partner.

LINK

 

[smy3th]

Thought I'd provide you with backup for my opinion.

From the National Institutes of Health, which is of course a part of the US Department of Health & Human Services:

LINK

Well first, don't take my comments as argument. I am certainly no expert on female orgasm (or on female anything for that matter). I'm here to try to learn about females, not to teach you that which I do not know. Still, one woman's experience is not necessarily representative. It may be, and I'm not saying your isn't, just curious about the backup for your extrapolation.

I don't find it particularly surprising to see the DHS figure on orgasm in general. I'm not so sure this can be extrapolated to hands free orgasm. It may be, but there certainly are physical differences among women. This could be either one. It may be that most women could do this, but as things are now, I think the ability in practice does not seem that wide spread. Of course, how would I know? I have no idea what women are really doing on subway trains.

 

[Casey811]

I skipped intentionally becauseI think it is quite unusual, in terms of actually physically being unable. (And I didn't want to chance saying something nasty.) The majority have mental hangups. If I had a nickel for every woman I have ever heard say, "I never masturbate" I'd be wealthy. And they wonder why they can't have an orgasm.

I don't buy it.

Clitoral only. Very common. Personally I can count on one had the number of times I had an orgasm strictly via good ole PIV sex with no extra help.

Physically can't ever? Rare.

After reading your link about orgasmic dysfunction, I'm still not quite sure what your point is. I'm trying though...

Mental hangup or not, those women can't have orgasms.
And even using your own report as a guide, 10 - 25% of women who actually receive treatment still cannot achieve one.

I still stand by what I say, and it's even backed up by the article you posted.
some women CANNOT have orgasms: FACT

 

[ewopper]

Oh, please. I can have at least 75 orgasms in five minutes.

wow... and a man is lucky to have one in 5 minutes.... you go girl

 

[ewopper]

Ok, i'll fess up. I have only had about three orgasms with penetration only. I need my clit to be involved in the party or it does absolutely nothing for me. I have 'my little friend' (vibrator), as I call it, do the manual stimulation while the hubby is getting his jollys as well.

I use to think that I was broken or something. I felt terrible telling men that I can't acheive orgasm by just them pumping in and out of me. But, I told them anyway because I wanted an orgasm too. They have always obliged and we could both be happy and satisfied that way.

I have since been told by several doctors that I am more normal than most. Horray for that!

what is normal these days [grin ]

 

[LadyFunkenstein]

After reading your link about orgasmic dysfunction, I'm still not quite sure what your point is. I'm trying though...

Mental hangup or not, those women can't have orgasms.
And even using your own report as a guide, 10 - 25% of women who actually receive treatment still cannot achieve one.

I still stand by what I say, and it's even backed up by the article you posted.
some women CANNOT have orgasms: FACT

Stand by as you wish. You are fighting hard to win what you perceive to be an argument, and I am merely trying to save you from being a lousy lay.

As I said a couple of posts ago:

I skipped intentionally becauseI think it is quite unusual, in terms of actually physically being unable. (And I didn't want to chance saying something nasty.) The majority have mental hangups. I

It is unusual. If you have come across a lot of women (25%!!!) who can't have an orgasm in sexual situations with you, you need to work on your technique. You aren't giving it the old college try.

 

[Casey811]

Stand by as you wish. You are fighting hard to win what you perceive to be an argument, and I am merely trying to save you from being a lousy lay.

It's not an argument, as supported by the link you so generously provided.
I'm merely supporting what that report said.
The lousy lay comment is uncalled for, since no amount of "saving" can help those 10 -25% of women (the same women from the link you provided!) who have already undergone treatment for their "mental sexual hangups".

It is unusual. If you have come across a lot of women (25%!!!) who can't have an orgasm in sexual situations with you, you need to work on your technique. You aren't giving it the old college try.

Unusual, yes...but it does exist.
Did you even read the report from the link that you provided?
Or is it selective reading?

Use what you want to support your claim, and ignore the rest.

The report stated:

EXPECTATIONS (PROGNOSIS)

Success rates when orgasmic dysfunction is treated by specialists in sex therapy usually are in the range of 65% to 85%. In primary orgasmic dysfunction, treatment is usually successful in 75% to 90% of cases.

A positive prognosis (probable outcome) is usually associated with being younger, emotionally healthy, and having a loving, affectionate relationship with a partner.

The little barbs about "lousy lay" and "aren't giving it the old college try" have no bearing here.

Says who?

National Institutes of Health

Or do you feel like removing that post?

 

[LadyFunkenstein]

I'lll say it again. You are worried about winning, and I am trying to help you. You prefer to throw up your hands every time a woman doesn't reach an orgasm as a result of your "performance" then be my guest. I never said that anorgasic women don't exist.
*****************************************
I take it at this point you are accepting my article as written. I accept it too, but I don't think you are reading the link properly.

Walking you through the math:

You have a control group of 100 random women.

Article says: 10% to 15% have never had an orgasm.

So, in our group of 100 women, lets go with the higher number and say that
15 have never had an orgasm. 85 have orgasms, some often, some not, but they do it.

According to the article, 75% to 90% of those who can't have an orgasm will find success with treatment.

That 75% to 90% does not refer to the entire population of women. It refers to those who need for treatment. Orgasmic woman aren't seeing a sex therapist for anorgasmia, of course.

Let's split the different between what the article calls "primary" and other, since there several different percentages bandied about,and allowing for the word "usually" and say that treatment works for 70%.

70% of our group of 15 women who couldn't orgasm but now can = 10.5.

Now that these lucky ladies can cum, we add them to the group of 85. We now have 95.5 orgasmic women.

That leaves 4.5 ladies who can't.

Which means 4.5% of all women can't have an orgasm. That is highly unusual.

You don't think that is worth you doing a little more work? This is rhetorical, I am not trying to pry: How many women have you slept with? Of those, how many never had an orgasm?

Giving it a lower nmber, if you have slept with 20 to 25 women, and more than 1 has claimed she simply had an orgasm and you didn't rise to the challenge, you need to start putting forth a little more effort. I am not saying it is your job to turn a woman's sexual life around. But of 20 - 25 woman, only 1 of them had some sort of which meant she absolutely could not cum. Everyone else needed more than what you were will to give and/or she was willing to accept.

 

[HotKittySpank]

I still stand by what I say, and it's even backed up by the article you posted.
some women CANNOT have orgasms: FACT

That is really so sad. I have heard that sometimes you can lose the ability to orgasm after certain surgeries which damage or accidentally cut nerves that you need in order to acheive orgasm. But, to have NEVER reached an orgasm! That is just shitty. It maked you wonder if during formation in the womb, perhaps something went wrong?

I also watched a show on adults who were born androgenous. Doctors and parents made decisions for them based on 'appearance' and as adults, the nerve endings needed to reach orgasm had been destroyed during gender reassignment surgery.

I would be so pissed.

 

[Casey811]

This isn't about winning or losing.
In fact, you already defended my original point...

Some women CANNOT achieve an orgasm

So we both agree.

Now here's a question, why have you targetted me to 'help' me not be a 'lousy lay'?

You have no idea who I am, how many people I've been with, or if I can bring women to orgasm. Frankly, the answers to those questions have no bearing whatsoever on the point I was trying to stress and are none of your business.

I'm requesting that you stop turning this into a personal thing (for whatever reason you started, I have no clue)....

You prefer to throw up your hands every time a woman doesn't reach an orgasm as a result of your "performance" then be my guest.

Stand by as you wish. You are fighting hard to win what you perceive to be an argument, and I am merely trying to save you from being a lousy lay.

It is unusual. If you have come across a lot of women (25%!!!) who can't have an orgasm in sexual situations with you, you need to work on your technique. You aren't giving it the old college try.

.. now can we all try and be adults?