Being a woman in geek culture

[Primalex]

We've been talking about death threats and rape threats, which is hardly the same as bird shit on your car.

You are right. One thing is real and damages your car. The other thing doesn't even deserve the word threat. If my mother doesn't get raped and killed by sixty players per Battlefield map, I worry if I don't play good enough.

 

[KoPilot]

Stella, don't take the bait.

 

[Stella_Omega]

What pisses me off is that the bros have taken a perfectly fine term-- bro, brother-- and by their useage they've turned it into something I would not want to be. For which, fuck them.

 

[Keroin]

What pisses me off is that the bros have taken a perfectly fine term-- bro, brother-- and by their useage they've turned it into something I would not want to be. For which, fuck them.

Try using the Aussie/Kiwi form, then: "bru". Who wouldn't want to be a bru?

 

[Stella_Omega]

Try using the Aussie/Kiwi form, then: "bru". Who wouldn't want to be a bru?

How do you pronounce that?

 

[Keroin]

How do you pronounce that?

Well, the Aussie/Kiwis on here can correct me if I'm wrong but to my Canuck ears it always sounded like "brew".

 

[Stella_Omega]

Well, the Aussie/Kiwis on here can correct me if I'm wrong but to my Canuck ears it always sounded like "brew".

Actually, I could use a brew about now...

 

[Ropebunny]

Well, the Aussie/Kiwis on here can correct me if I'm wrong but to my Canuck ears it always sounded like "brew".

Our 'bro' can sound like 'brew' depending on regional accent, though I've never seen the spelling 'bru'. I don't use twitter, Facebook or whatever else is popular at the moment so I really wouldn't know. There is also 'brah' but it's usually used by hipsters. And it grates me bad. *shifts uncomfortably in seat*

 

[Keroin]

Our 'bro' can sound like 'brew' depending on regional accent, though I've never seen the spelling 'bru'. I don't use twitter, Facebook or whatever else is popular at the moment so I really wouldn't know. There is also 'brah' but it's usually used by hipsters. And it grates me bad. *shifts uncomfortably in seat*

Oh, I just made up that spelling to show the difference. "Brah" is a Hawaiian thing, isn't it?

 

[satindesire]

Oh, I just made up that spelling to show the difference. "Brah" is a Hawaiian thing, isn't it?

Not necessarily, it's used in the same instance of "Bro" usually in a sarcastic manner to denote the existence of a douchebag.

 

[Keroin]

Not necessarily, it's used in the same instance of "Bro" usually in a sarcastic manner to denote the existence of a douchebag.

But Hawaiin in origin? That's how I know it.

 

[satindesire]

But Hawaiin in origin? That's how I know it.

That's possible!

 

[Stella_Omega]

AS the Hawaiians use it, it actually means "Brother."

 

[MeekMe]

I'm new here, but not to "geek" culture

I read a little of the beginning of this post but didn't get as far as the recent discussion. As for the original post/question, I do have fun with table top gaming and comic books as well as anime and manga. As far as my treatment; I have guy friends who enjoy gaming with me. They do tend to point out that I don't match the stereotype, but never treat me like I am an outsider or that I know less. Actually, they seem surprised when I don't get a reference or understand certain aspects. ^_^

As far as people who aren't in my circle of friends, they all seem very nice. I wonder if it's location? Some people have been rather distant, though. I assume that's their own personality. I will smile and be nice but I tend to not want to talk to strangers, I assume other people feel the same. Maybe I've never noticed a male in the "geek" culture treating me different.

I really enjoy my time spent surrounded by comic books and minis. I haven't really found myself being discriminated against because I'm a girl. I don't doubt that it is a problem, though. Like all things, I assume time and hard work will help the situation.

 

[Bramblethorn]

Couple more interesting links:

Deborah Stanish: "Fangirl Isn't A Dirty Word": http://www.apex-magazine.com/fangirl-isnt-a-dirty-word/

Another good Scalzi rant: http://whatever.scalzi.com/2013/08/05/a-creators-note-to-gatekeepers/

"Gatekeeping runs entirely counter to my intent as a writer. I’ve always been very clear that I write science fiction that’s meant to be readable to people who aren’t science fiction fans — or as I prefer to think of them, people who don’t know yet that they might like science fiction. Old Man’s War, Redshirts, Fuzzy Nation — all of these books were written with the intent of being readable to outsiders to the genre...

"So, when I take the time and effort to create a gateway, to invite people into the genre, and then some dude shows up at that gateway, unasked, telling people they can’t come through unless they can name every Heinlein book in reverse chronological order (or whatever), I am, shall we say, less than pleased. One, demanding that people new to something be versed in all its trivia is stupid (it’s also stupid when they have liked it for some time). Two, assuming that one’s own interests are the only interests that define real geekdom is also stupid."

 

[notalwaysweak]

I was trying to catch up on the thread and then my brain just went NOPE.

I was coming in to ask if anyone else reads/posts to the Everyday Sexism Project. Sorry if it's already been linked.

 

[Sir_Winston54]

From NPR:

A Few Takes On How To Fix The Tech Industry's 'Bro' Problem

 

[Stella_Omega]

From NPR:

A Few Takes On How To Fix The Tech Industry's 'Bro' Problem

OMG the comments...

 

[satindesire]

From NPR:

A Few Takes On How To Fix The Tech Industry's 'Bro' Problem

OMG the comments...

Yeah, that was my reaction as well. Some of them are utterly flabbergasting:

"Downvote if you want but it doesn't change reality. You've got a group of guys who were by and large socially ostracized by women growing up, many of whom probably have experienced girls using their crippling loneliness to take advantage of them. And you really can't understand why they might harbor resentment towards women? Instead of getting your panties in a bunch over fixing tech culture, why don't you fix girl culture so that nerdy guys aren't treated like lepers. Maybe then nerdy guys will show more respect towards women when they aren't constantly being rejected and treated like dirt by them."

(same guy as above)

"Bingo. This same group of people, who are now being singled out as sexist monsters, spent their youths being ostracized and marginalized because of their preferences towards geek culture. Now that the rest of society suddenly sees the value in that culture, they want it to change to match "normal" social values. The very people who picked on these techies as kids and encouraged in them feelings of social isolation and awkwardness now want to blame their victims for not being socially well-adjusted enough to deserve to be their boss."

(same guy as above)

"A group of guys making an app that, if anything, makes themselves out to be lonely perverts is hardly what I would consider open hostility and disrespect toward women. If you don't think titstare falls into the category of off-color jokes then guess what Billy? You've been living in a PC/HR dominated hell hole so long you can't remember what reality looks like.

My argument is that the tech industry IS NOT sexist, that the only people who think it is are the exact same people who were socially ostracizing techies back in high school, and that we should probably expect some hostility towards women from a group whose primary interaction with the opposite sex was rejection."

(of course, the same guy)

"Thanks for injecting some reality into this debate. Just because some people find something offensive doesn't mean they have a right to silence or eliminate that offensive behavior. This culture and these attitudes aren't being played out in the offices of IBM, Sun, Google, etc. It's the result of small groups mainly college aged men who have been able to create their own startups without relying on the buttoned-down and staunchly PC support of the entrenched financial system. This is not unique to the tech industry, any small business that doesn't have to answer to a legal HR team is going to sometimes behave in a less then perfectly austere way. If it offends you, don't buy their product or work for that startup. But let's not all rush off to protest Congress writes new laws just to deal with immature 20 year olds making distasteful jokes after an all-night energy drink fueled hacking binge."


This guy sounds like a real Peach. I wonder why he's lonely and perpetually rejected by women? *rollseyesforever!*

 

[Recidiva]

*rollseyesforever!*

Satin, that's silly. You can't roll your eyes forever. It is scientifically impossible and defies the laws of physics.

What a fake geek girl. I'm taking back your secret badge and ring. No, don't cry. Don't act like such a girl about all this.

You're embarrassing yourself.

 

[satindesire]

Satin, that's silly. You can't roll your eyes forever. It is scientifically impossible and defies the laws of physics.

What a fake geek girl. I'm taking back your secret badge and ring. No, don't cry. Don't act like such a girl about all this.

You're embarrassing yourself.

I'm SUCH an uber-geek that I invented (and patented!) my own perpetual-motion-eye-rolling-machine.

Get with this program and I might let you test ride it. Sexual innuendo totally on purpose.

 

[Recidiva]

I'm SUCH an uber-geek that I invented (and patented!) my own perpetual-motion-eye-rolling-machine.

Get with this program and I might let you test ride it. Sexual innuendo totally on purpose.

You think you've won but...

Yeah, pretty much you've won. Awaiting invitation.

 

[KoPilot]

I was trying to catch up on the thread and then my brain just went NOPE.

I was coming in to ask if anyone else reads/posts to the Everyday Sexism Project. Sorry if it's already been linked.

Haven't seen this (or if I have I don't remember), but it reminds me a lot of Fat, Ugly, or Slutty which seems to be the same thing, except for multiplayer online gaming. ;P

 

[satindesire]

You think you've won but...

Yeah, pretty much you've won. Awaiting invitation.

*fans self* I'll be in my bunk.

Haven't seen this (or if I have I don't remember), but it reminds me a lot of Fat, Ugly, or Slutty which seems to be the same thing, except for multiplayer online gaming. ;P

It makes me SOMADUGH that they haven't updated FUoS in months. I was obsessed with that site.

 

[Recidiva]

*fans self* I'll be in my bunk.

Hah!

We dearly need a hug emote.

:hugemote:

Uh oh. That looks like huge mote. Not the same.