Bistro Bijou

[Tzara]

Probably true. I like my pants. That said, I would sacrifice a pair for a good cause.

Elegy for Homburg's Pants

Someplace in Kansas, lost enow,
Are Homburg's pants. They'd suffered wear—
Sharp tear of midwest cats' meow.
Some happy claws shred his slacks there.

 

[sassynyc]

whew! I'm only up to page 120 and already I've got to buy yet another fridge after the last time. Another fridge coming soon for the next HUNDRED AND THIRTY pages the bistro has rolled out since then.

You people talk a lot, you know?

I love that about you.

and as an aside, I may be back from Hell shortly.

hearts.

time slips away through these bars
and i trade one cell for the next
caged behind beams of moonlight
awaiting pardon from my warden
to slip into sweet sleep before
the sun shed's light on the world
i listen to the deafening stillness of night
develop an easy gallop into morning
as the sun stirs and rises, i am caught
in the cross hairs of her rays
and receding moonglow.

Daaaay-um! You are thorough. I'd completely forgotten about this.
You must truly miss this place.....you used EMOTICONS, and everything.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

I'd forgotten the list one Ron did of me too sort of put me back on track

 

[UnderYourSpell]

a couple of jokes

One woman says to another, "I can't understand why you haven't
gone to see that new gynecologist yet!"

"My gynecologist is fine. I don't need to change."

"But the new one's so young and handsome, while your gynecologist
is so old!"

The other woman replies with a smile, "Yeah, I know. His hands
shake all the time!"

------------------------------------------------

The college football player knew his way around the locker room better than he did the library, so when my husband's co-worker saw the gridiron star roaming the stacks looking confused, she asked how she could help.

"I have to read a play by Shakespeare," he said.

"Which one?" she asked.

He scanned the shelves and answered, "William."

 

[myinnerslut]

she can come too, we'll be good to her, the more the merrier

oh, Master look! they'd be good to me too. can i go with you? please? pretty please?

 

[Homburg]

oh, Master look! they'd be good to me too. can i go with you? please? pretty please?

See what you started, loststar?

 

[UnderYourSpell]

I've just done a purity test and I can proudly say that I am 60.8% pure! Mind you some of the questions are horrendous and not for the faint hearted!

 

[Safe_Bet]

I've just done a purity test and I can proudly say that I am 60.8% pure! Mind you some of the questions are horrendous and not for the faint hearted!

Link?

 

[Safe_Bet]

One woman says to another, "I can't understand why you haven't
gone to see that new gynecologist yet!"

"My gynecologist is fine. I don't need to change."

"But the new one's so young and handsome, while your gynecologist
is so old!"

The other woman replies with a smile, "Yeah, I know. His hands
shake all the time!"

------------------------------------------------

The college football player knew his way around the locker room better than he did the library, so when my husband's co-worker saw the gridiron star roaming the stacks looking confused, she asked how she could help.

"I have to read a play by Shakespeare," he said.

"Which one?" she asked.

He scanned the shelves and answered, "William."

Zsa Zsa Gabor goes to the gynocologist.

Doctor asks, "Every had a check up here before?"

She answers, "No, only Hungarians!"

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Link?

http://www.puritytest.net/

good luck!

 

[Safe_Bet]

25.4%

Yeah, so what! I'm not running for public office!


But this test is bias against submissive, lesbian sluts! The questions are loaded just to make us look bad! Just saying.

(and what's with the question about "do you keep shit in your refrigerator?" Ewwww!)​

 

[UnderYourSpell]

25.4%

Yeah, so what! I'm not running for public office!


But this test is bias against submissive, lesbian sluts! The questions are loaded just to make us look bad! Just saying.

(and what's with the question about "do you keep shit in your refrigerator?" Ewwww!)​

or do it in a coffin !!!!!!!!

 

[Anschul]

Cannibal #1: "You know, I really hate my mother-in-law."

Cannibal #2: "So, just eat the rice."

 

[Safe_Bet]

or do it in a coffin !!!!!!!!

erm, you DIDN'T answer "yes" to that one?

Uh, uh, me neither! - honest!

 

[Homburg]

I'm in the 30's, and MIS and viv both have lower scores than I do. As safe_bet says, same-sex relations has a strong bias in that test, so bisexual folk really get lower scores.

Then again, I'm one of those people for whom a high purity score is not a positive, it's a challenge. I take pride in how many people that I've corrupted, and I've personally caused some precipitous drops in that score.

In my world, pure equals boring.

 

[Safe_Bet]

I'm in the 30's, and MIS and viv both have lower scores than I do. As safe_bet says, same-sex relations has a strong bias in that test, so bisexual folk really get lower scores.

Then again, I'm one of those people for whom a high purity score is not a positive, it's a challenge. I take pride in how many people that I've corrupted, and I've personally caused some precipitous drops in that score.

In my world, pure equals boring.

Hommie - I think I'd better check your refrigerator!

~ OMG ~

That had BETTER be chocolate pudding!

P.S. Tell Viv and MIS I'm proud of them!

 

[Homburg]

Hommie - I think I'd better check your refrigerator!

~ OMG ~

That had BETTER be chocolate pudding!

P.S. Tell Viv and MIS I'm proud of them!

Oh my god, I just realised that I actually do have to answer Yes to that one. We got a new kitten recently, and had to take a fecal sample. It got sealed into the specimen tube, then into the specimen bag, and then into a ziploc bag, and then it was stored in the fridge for a night until we could take it to the vet. Damn.

 

[Safe_Bet]

Oh my god, I just realised that I actually do have to answer Yes to that one. We got a new kitten recently, and had to take a fecal sample. It got sealed into the specimen tube, then into the specimen bag, and then into a ziploc bag, and then it was stored in the fridge for a night until we could take it to the vet. Damn.

* Gack, augh, pught, barf * Damn! Teach me to steal Tootsie Rolls!

(Don't tell Amy - I used her toothbrush!)​

 

[unpredictablebijou]

ahem.

12.5


and by the way, the coffin question includes graveyards and mausoleums.

so yeah.

You mean to tell me none of you has ever done it in a graveyard? I thought that was mandatory for poets.

bj

 

[Safe_Bet]

ahem.

12.5


and by the way, the coffin question includes graveyards and mausoleums.

so yeah.

You mean to tell me none of you has ever done it in a graveyard? I thought that was mandatory for poets.

bj

12.5!

Satan only got down to a 15!

Yeow!
​

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Satan only got down to a 15!

Yeow!
[/CENTER]

Well, y'know...

*clearing throat*

I'm older than you.
And I've been naked in public more than most people.

Actually, I was a bit shocked myself. Especially since I had to say no to all the stuff that involved coercion and drugging people and stuff.

And the aircraft carrier. Missed that one too.

bj
but, um, yeah.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

I'm in the 30's, and MIS and viv both have lower scores than I do. As safe_bet says, same-sex relations has a strong bias in that test, so bisexual folk really get lower scores.

Then again, I'm one of those people for whom a high purity score is not a positive, it's a challenge. I take pride in how many people that I've corrupted, and I've personally caused some precipitous drops in that score.

In my world, pure equals boring.

Hey does that mean I am over half way boring?
I wonder if keeping dog pee in the fridge counts?

ahem.

12.5


and by the way, the coffin question includes graveyards and mausoleums.

so yeah.

You mean to tell me none of you has ever done it in a graveyard? I thought that was mandatory for poets.

bj

Only thing I ever did in the churchyard at night was got chased through it after being caught scrumping in an orchard next door

 

[Safe_Bet]

I wonder if keeping dog pee in the fridge counts?

Note to Self: NEVER accept if UYS offers lemonade.




(P.S. It sure does in MY book!)

 

[Tzara]

You mean to tell me none of you has ever done it in a graveyard? I thought that was mandatory for poets.

I scored 48%, which surprised me. I thought I'd be higher than that. (I mean more "pure," whatever that means.)

Hell, yes, I've done it in a graveyard. Not, though, 'cuz I have some Edgar Allan Poe fetish or anything—that was simply the convenient secluded space to neck (& c.) in my town when I was youngster. The main way in was locked and the back road was kind of an off-the-path thing.

And, no, I have no plans to store excrement of any kind in my refrigerator any time soon. Though we did do that in the public health lab I worked in. Does that count (it said office)?

 

[Tzara]

Hey does that mean I am over half way boring?

No.

It means you have a lot of territory to explore. Happy tramping!