Christianity - Rewiring my Brain

[talikat]

This was an interesting post to me because the one thing each of these hospitals have in common is that they strive to help people through scientific care that is provided with kindness and compassion. When you break it down, isn't this also a fundamentally christian view? Isn't this what the basis of many world "religions" is based upon?

Perhaps what should be questioned isn't the concept of christianity, but rather the concept of human interpretation of it. If you really break the theory down to the vibration of intention, down to kindness and compassion, you come up with a pretty universal view of how humans wish to be treated.

To the op, I'm sorry that you're struggling. Personally, I don't believe that a person's worth is defined by the religion he belongs to. It should be more about the religion that he presents to the world.

and to circle back to the hospital analogy..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cDDWvj_q-o8

ITA with your post GG.

That video was very touching and the reason why I treat people with kindness, whether it be in a hospital or the grocery store.

You just don't know what the person may have been through that day and a little smile or a 'hello' can make a difference.

 

[BuckyDuckman]

It's sad that you apparently perceive God's love as a series of rules to follow, like a recipe or magic potion. I believe you'll find the greatest peace in releasing letting go of preconceived notions about what defines "right" and "wrong."

Some things are easy to perceive as right vs wrong. Golden rule sort of thinking. Stealing: If it ain't yours, don't take it, because you don't want that to happen to you, do you? Killing people, that's another easy one.

Faith isn't a switch you turn on and off. Belief might be, but not faith. So, you lost your belief. Okay, big deal. I would suggest that you haven't lost your faith, that you haven't lost your hope. It's tough to fill an empty space with a void.

I have a friend of mine who was raised as a Christian Fundamentalist. In his early twenties, he abandoned his faith and I asked him, "So, what keeps you moral?"

"Laws," he said. "The bigger group of mankind sort of frown on a lot of the same things church did, too. Break those laws and they tend to getcha for that."

"Okay, but what about a moral compass?"

"The code of chivalry works for me," he said.

I don't know if that's really how he feels, but he remains one of the most morally grounded people I know.

So, I'm going to suggest you do good work. Take the moral high ground that feels right to you. Listen to your conscious and not the years of preaching that has been beaten into you. Jerking off might be considered a sin of lust, but I never saw it that way. It never felt that way to me. It's an orgasm. It's fun. It's not an addiction. I'm not idolizing those women I look at, I'm appreciating them. Where's the line between idolizing and appreciation? You get to decide for yourself.

If having a drink feels okay, then drink away. But don't drive drunk. And don't drunk text.

If having sex with multiple partners feels good, be respectful to them as people, too. Wear a condom or get tested regularly and make sure your partners do, too. Don't lie and say "I love you" if you don't mean it. And don't sweat it so much if (as you put it) some invisible guy in the sky doesn't approve. See, I have a real problem with how loving someone can be a sin. Same with loving more than one person.

Anyway, good luck on your journey. Life is only temporary, but don't give away the ending, okay?

 

[SCcouple1990]

From the time of cavemen, societies had their Gods. As their societies died so did their Gods (Zeus is no longer around). Religions of today may face the same fate.

Your faith is a personal decision. It has changed, and may evolve at some point in the future.

I think if you love you neighbor as yourself, and do unto others as you would have them do unto you, you should be able to live an exemplary life, regardless of you religious views.

 

[Harold_Hill]

Since we are on the subject...

I have a question. I have noticed that some posters believe in God, while others don't believe in God. Some posters say we should love each other and live by the golden rule, which is an honorable philosophy - - but - - if there is no God, then why live by any rule? Why not take everything you can get and screw everybody else? Since we are going to die anyway, and if there is no punishment in the hereafter, what's the downside of being greedy and self-centered?

 

[Harold_Hill]

Lol

A couple of months ago, my mother-in-law, upon learning that my husband and I are non-religious, posted on my FB timeline: "Have fun burning in hell. Sorry you're taking my son with you. I will pray for both of you. Amen." He and I both ended up blocking her, and she still calls him every couple of weeks like nothing's wrong.

Because, ya know, my husband couldn't have possibly drawn his own conclusions about such matters in the 43 years before I met him. It HAD to be my devil vagina magic.

Vagina magic? Hmmm, now there's a magic a guy could get into. If a guy has to burn in hell, why not enjoy the trip?

 

[Sammael Bard]

I have a question. I have noticed that some posters believe in God, while others don't believe in God. Some posters say we should love each other and live by the golden rule, which is an honorable philosophy - - but - - if there is no God, then why live by any rule? Why not take everything you can get and screw everybody else? Since we are going to die anyway, and if there is no punishment in the hereafter, what's the downside of being greedy and self-centered?

No god or religion stops you from being self-centred or greedy or selfish or an ass.

Some of us just don't enjoy being any of those.

 

[Bramblethorn]

I have a question. I have noticed that some posters believe in God, while others don't believe in God. Some posters say we should love each other and live by the golden rule, which is an honorable philosophy - - but - - if there is no God, then why live by any rule? Why not take everything you can get and screw everybody else? Since we are going to die anyway, and if there is no punishment in the hereafter, what's the downside of being greedy and self-centered?

Penn Jillette put it pretty well:

"The question I get asked by religious people all the time is, without God, what’s to stop me from raping all I want? And my answer is: I do rape all I want. And the amount I want is zero. And I do murder all I want, and the amount I want is zero. The fact that these people think that if they didn’t have this person watching over them that they would go on killing, raping rampages is the most self-damning thing I can imagine. I don't want to do that."

I don't believe I'm going to answer to a god, but I have to answer to myself for my choices. If anything, atheism for me is something of a spur to kindness: if I walk past somebody in need, I don't get to tell myself that God is going to make it all right for them in this world or the next.

By and large, it makes me happy to make other people happy.

 

[NightL]

I have a question. I have noticed that some posters believe in God, while others don't believe in God. Some posters say we should love each other and live by the golden rule, which is an honorable philosophy - - but - - if there is no God, then why live by any rule? Why not take everything you can get and screw everybody else? Since we are going to die anyway, and if there is no punishment in the hereafter, what's the downside of being greedy and self-centered?

That would make the person a wanker, in the most derogatory sense possible - wouldn't it Harold?

 

[La damnee elle la licorne]

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

The absolute worst humans participate in organized religious services or call themselves atheists.

 

[SCcouple1990]

I have a question. I have noticed that some posters believe in God, while others don't believe in God. Some posters say we should love each other and live by the golden rule, which is an honorable philosophy - - but - - if there is no God, then why live by any rule? Why not take everything you can get and screw everybody else? Since we are going to die anyway, and if there is no punishment in the hereafter, what's the downside of being greedy and self-centered?

Because we as a society have a moral compass. Most people know that is is not acceptable to steal, murder, rape etc. Believing, or not believing, in God does not set your moral compass.

We are going to all die anyway. It is what you do in life that matters. Hopefully people something positive behind.

If you take what you want because we are going to die anyway, pretty soon what a person takes gets bigger, and the anyway comes sooner.

 

[Yasuo_]

I want to thank everybody again for all your help. In this case, it's really hard to respond to everything because there is just so much to address. Just know that I hear your words and I appreciate them. I feel bad that people have taken the time to write up very long, detailed advice only for it to seemingly fall on deaf ears. It has not. I promise.

Thank you again, so much.

 

[Harold_Hill]

Because we as a society have a moral compass. Most people know that is is not acceptable to steal, murder, rape etc. Believing, or not believing, in God does not set your moral compass.

We are going to all die anyway. It is what you do in life that matters. Hopefully people something positive behind.

If you take what you want because we are going to die anyway, pretty soon what a person takes gets bigger, and the anyway comes sooner.

But society does not have a default moral compass. All you have to do is look at the world around you to see that. Some people think it is acceptable to fly an airplane into a building and kill thousands of people, (9/11) just because they don't like you, or put millions of people they don't like in concentration camps and kill them, (Nazi Germany). Just because you think you have a moral compass, doesn't mean that society does.

For example: The 1% today think its perfectly acceptable to pay politicians to change banking and investment laws in their favor so they can control the wealth of nations at your expense. You can't even get interest on a savings account, (where 30 years ago you could), because the Federal banks loan money to the rich at 0% interest. Why should rich investors like hedge fund managers borrow money from you through individual savings accounts when they can get money from the government for free? Because we have no social moral compass, the rich get richer while you have less and less opportunity. Because they have no moral compass, politicians sell their vote for campaign contributions, "at your expense"!

You can buy a politician, (and subsequently the law), but you can't buy God. When the belief in God, (and church), is strong, society has a moral compass. When the belief in God and church is weak, you have what you have today: murder/suicides, drug gangs controlling neighborhoods, terrorist threats, etc. Regardless of whether or not God exists, when you marginalize the church, the only person you hurt is yourself. Politicians can be bought, God cannot: The church IS the moral compass of society. Even the OP suffers because he marginalized the church in his own mind.

Note: For those too stupid to figure out that I quoted another post to make my point and this post is not an intentional jab at anyone's opinion or point of view - - I quoted another post to make my point and this post is not an intentional jab at anyone's opinion or point of view!

 

[GrrlFriday]

I recently went through a period where a specialist got all faith-healy on me, and I experienced something similar. Stuff that helped me was to reconnect with what was important to me, and to keep up with friends and family of all religious stripes. I read books like nobody's business - André Comte-Sponville's "book of atheist spirituality" was the best of the bunch available to me, book-wise. If you're interested in going into the scholarly literature, I thought Kenneth Pargament, Catherine Caldwell-Harris and Julie Exline had good things to say.

 

[NippleMuncher]

Religion and/or a belief in God does not make one spiritual, morally centered, or just, these are things that you either are or you are not. For an example look to politicians, religious "leaders", and many the common man who claim to be good God fearing folks, yet remain to be blight on the buttocks of the world.

Specifically for Yasuo, you can continue to follow your religious beliefs WITHOUT the guilt and control of the dogma and it's proselytists. If you want to go to church, go, if you don't, don't. You have the power to pick and choose the points that work for you, don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Blind belief in something doesn't make that thing true, it simply makes you a follower that is easily controlled by that thing. If you question your beliefs and those being forced upon you by others, only then can you decide if what you've been taught and are continuing to be bombarded with is true for you.

 

[Hypoxia]

'God' is a job title, not a proper name. Or is your lawyer named Lawyer?

Many deities exist. None have been shown to exist outside human consciousness.

{JHWH}'s love seems peculiarly applied. It does not seem to extend to the many millions of humans tortured, maimed, enslaved, and killed in human wars and genocides, nor those swept away in natural or man-made disasters or epidemics or any other such tragedies. {JHWH}'s love seems singularly capricious and unreliable.

Ah, but it's all part of {JHWH}'s Plan, you might contend. Do you feel comfortable depending on such a planner? Do you think your heartfelt prayers might induce {JHWH} to change its divine plans, and natural law, to accommodate your desires? Do you, really?

Xian Game Rules require such beliefs. Other Game Rules do not. I do not choose to play Xian Games -- I do not find them worthwhile. YMMV.

 

[Aphro]

I have a question. I have noticed that some posters believe in God, while others don't believe in God. Some posters say we should love each other and live by the golden rule, which is an honorable philosophy - - but - - if there is no God, then why live by any rule? Why not take everything you can get and screw everybody else? Since we are going to die anyway, and if there is no punishment in the hereafter, what's the downside of being greedy and self-centered?

No one can carry on like that, indefinitely, and not reap the rewards of a life ill-lived. If you are an asshole and a selfish dick to people, because eventually, that's going to catch up with you. You will have no friends, no family...nothing. If you are okay with being ostracized and hated, then, I guess you're good.

But don't worry, you can spend your whole life lying, murdering and cheating, but when you are almost ready to start pushing up daisies, all you have to do is accept Jesus into your heart, say some Hail Mary's, and all will be forgiven. You'll be sitting on a cloud next to St. Peter, along with all the rest who prayed their lives away for so much as looking at a boob.

And honestly, if the only purpose of God and religion is to keep people from being greedy, self-centred assholes, because they are afraid of some sort of retribution, or of not getting their "Do not pass Go, Go directly to Heaven" card, then I for one don't want any part of it.



I don't need to be afraid of God, or what's going to happen to me, to be a decent, kind, and honourable person. The bible isn't what keeps me from murdering my neighbours, or stealing from old ladies.

 

[Harold_Hill]

No one can carry on like that, indefinitely, and not reap the rewards of a life ill-lived. If you are an asshole and a selfish dick to people, because eventually, that's going to catch up with you. You will have no friends, no family...nothing. If you are okay with being ostracized and hated, then, I guess you're good.

But don't worry, you can spend your whole life lying, murdering and cheating, but when you are almost ready to start pushing up daisies, all you have to do is accept Jesus into your heart, say some Hail Mary's, and all will be forgiven. You'll be sitting on a cloud next to St. Peter, along with all the rest who prayed their lives away for so much as looking at a boob.

And honestly, if the only purpose of God and religion is to keep people from being greedy, self-centred assholes, because they are afraid of some sort of retribution, or of not getting their "Do not pass Go, Go directly to Heaven" card, then I for one don't want any part of it.



I don't need to be afraid of God, or what's going to happen to me, to be a decent, kind, and honourable person. The bible isn't what keeps me from murdering my neighbours, or stealing from old ladies.

Good point, but which is the better life? A long life of misery and poverty, living in fear of those more powerful than yourself, or a shorter life surrounded by opulence and wealth, being feared by those with no power? Everybody wants a better car, a bigger house and more money. If you were given the choice, which would you choose, a life of misery and poverty, or a life of opulence and wealth. Most people will tell you, happiness isn't how long you live, it's how you live your life.

 

[may_I_please]

I have a question. I have noticed that some posters believe in God, while others don't believe in God. Some posters say we should love each other and live by the golden rule, which is an honorable philosophy - - but - - if there is no God, then why live by any rule? Why not take everything you can get and screw everybody else? Since we are going to die anyway, and if there is no punishment in the hereafter, what's the downside of being greedy and self-centered?

You believe goodness is an external force

I believe it's innate in humanity

Greed and self-centred pursuit of money you think that's what we'd all descend to without the benefit of organised religion?

Without a paternalistic godhead all we have is each other

 

[may_I_please]

I actually believe that some of the most immoral acts and attitudes come from those who believe they are speaking for a god

 

[Aphro]

Good point, but which is the better life? A long life of misery and poverty, living in fear of those more powerful than yourself, or a shorter life surrounded by opulence and wealth, being feared by those with no power? Everybody wants a better car, a bigger house and more money. If you were given the choice, which would you choose, a life of misery and poverty, or a life of opulence and wealth. Most people will tell you, happiness isn't how long you live, it's how you live your life.

I'm not sure if I am understanding you. Are you saying that a religious life automatically equals a life of misery and poverty? Or that choosing a secular existence is the road to riches?

I agree with you in that happiness is not how long you live, but how well. Run my signature quote through Google translate. Roughly, it means he who lives well, lives twice.

However, not everyone defines living well as having a massive house, fancy car, and a Rolex for each wrist. Health, family, good friends, and enough free time to enjoy those things, is to me more important. I would gladly sacrifice material items to be with people I love. That's why I made the choice to stay home with my kids when they were small. It meant less $$$ but the time I had was beyond priceless to me.

Anyway, getting off topic. I am still not seeing the correlation between atheistic capitalist, money loving asshole and poor, poverty stricken, downtrodden yet pious christian.

 

[La damnee elle la licorne]

 

[Yasuo_]

I also wanted to add some things to this since this problem is not just about one day waking up and thinking, "You know, God doesn't seem legit. I want to be Atheist now."

There are a lot of lifestyle implications with being Baptist, Southern, Republican, and even American. Now, it's all a clusterfuck of problems that I feel like I never really was as a person. I have a slight Southern accent at times, but otherwise, all of the stigmas were slammed right in front of my face and I have had to defend those stereotypes for my entire life. Why? Well, I felt obligation. I'm not quite sure how to explain it, but since I grew up the way I did, I fell into a life that I felt I needed to represent.

Taking a step back, I realized that I'm way more liberal than I ever knew even when I was a Christian. The controversial topics in today's society is just absurd. Why would I care what people who I don't even know want to do with their lives, how they spend their money, or even what they believe? Got pregnant by accident and are facing a tough time with making probably the toughest decision of your life? I say that it's not my place to get involved. Do you support gay marriage? Okay, fine. No problem. I have never cared.

All of this is a culmination of a lifestyle of a Christian, or rather, the Christian I was taught to be and the types of Christians I see on a day-to-day basis. I want no association with that.

There's a lot going on at one time and it's just terribly difficult to try to change your life so drastically. I have accepted being viewed as the typical middle class Christian who has a particular set of views when in reality, I have really never personally cared about any of them.

All of that is just secondary issues feeding into what I believe is the ultimate problem. I have believed all my life that there is a perfect God who could create and allow such a fucked up world for his creation to live in. There are people who are suffering so greatly that my life would be like a paradise and I should be happy. Why would such a being exist? Why would he allow this? I'm sorry but "Only he knows the answers and he's trying to teach you something" is just not good enough for me.

I feel like this is a defining moment in my life where I am finding my identity for the first time after 27 years. I guess this is the part where it just gets really hard before it ever gets easier? I dunno...

Oh and I know you guys have been saying that I can fit this God into my life and live the way I want. That's not cutting it for me either. It's not that I'm stepping away from God. I'm angry, sad, and confused. I don't believe there's a cookie-cutter deity out there to just make me feel better about why life is what my purpose is, giving me hope that divine intervention is incoming. No, I believe that there is an evil being who is jealous, a murderer, without mercy, and it's all for his own joy. We are here to entertain him, to be his friend, to worship him. Nah, fuck that. God sounds like a lonely middle school child who has no friends and is playing with his toys, saying that he will burn them for all eternity if they don't do what he says.

 

[jaF0]

I also wanted to add some things to this since this problem is not just about one day waking up and thinking,

Me t'inks you t'ink too much.

Religion is a scam

'God' (or whatever other name you use) is a figment of the human imagination. Man created God, not the other way around.

The sooner you 'get that', the less conflicted you'll be.

 

[La damnee elle la licorne]