Coming on Command

[callinectes]

Great Castle Realm article you posted callinectes! That is pretty much exactly the way we handle my orgasms.

Most welcome!

 

[catalina_francisco]

Thank you for your thoughts. They are very appreciated. Catalina, sorry for snapping. i was on the defensive about something else when i read your comment.

LOL, I didn't think you snapped. I just want you to know you do not need to be everything, nor that you can ever be perfect, you can only grow and try to do your best. Remember you are having 3 relationships...one with him, one with his slave, and one with them both as a couple...it is a lot to cope with and adjust to and I would hate you to burn out through placing expectations on yourself where they may not be necessary.

Catalina

 

[SweetErika]

Isn't it nice how some doctors don't think it necessary to tell people of the possible side effects of medication?!! I swear, I have learned more without asking from the pharmacist filling the prescription than the doctors. One thing they don't mention is how while taking the pill you can get pregnant if you use certain cough mixtures and medications, taking certain doses of Vitamin C and drinking lots of orange juice. all of which can make the pill redundant. My daughter was on a health kick and drinking loads of juice when she fell pregnant....I told her what I knew and when she asked the doctors, they agreed that the amopunt she had been drinking while healthy in other ways, had almost certainly made it possible to fall pregant despite taking the pill.

Catalina

Wow, I had no idea Vitamin C could interfere with hormonal bc! Our drug leaflets only mention antibiotics and maybe one or two other drugs. Fortunately, I never got pregnant (that I know for sure - I suspect I had an early miscarriage or two over the years), but that could very well have happened considering I take massive doses of C sometimes. We did use condoms too most of the time, and now I'm even more glad we went for two good methods!

Kailey, your post on his other girl having lots of O's made me think of something: I may have trouble getting there, but when they happen, they're spectacular and all the more special to both of us. If I could do it anytime, quickly, I think it'd lose some of that multi-faceted excitement. So, even if you and I never have similar experiences to his other girl, I think ours are/should be treasured just as much, if not more. Your Master either does or will come to appreciate your different styles, and be thrilled he has that variety on this count, I'm sure.

 

[callinectes]

I have been trained, in a fairly short period of time, to come on command. I am fortunate in that I have never had trouble achieving orgasams via physical stimulation. My Dominant used that natural ability to condition me respond to his voice. It started just as the article describes by telling me to cum when I was already on the edge anyway. Over time we have come to the point that he can call me on the phone and with very little "build-up" cause to me orgasm. I am nearly to the point now that he can tell me cum with no mental foreplay. (a mixed blessing when I am engrossed in something at work and I get a call) It has taken several months or real-time 3-D interaction to get to this point. But remember, I already have a natural ability to come easily and come hard, so I had a head start. Disclaimer: I am not boasting about this, I just don't want folks to think 3 months is a goal to shoot for here!


I should also mention that my Dominant is very free with my orgasms and does not use orgasm denial as punishment. When we are together I do have to ask for permission but he doesn't make me beg for extended periods of time, etc. If we are not going to see each other for several days, he "gives" me a large number of orgasms to use as I choose. As such, that may also give me an advantage in this kind of training.

 

[submissiveknight]

Just a little fuel for thought. My Mistress told me that in Her prior relationships that She would fake orgasms. Before She met me She had never experienced a true orgasm.

One of my greatest prides is being able to make Her come.

Back when we first met (and at the time it wasn't a D/s realationship) I tied Her up to my bed (yea we've been kinky from the get go). At the time I didn't know that She had never truly cummed before! I spent hours on Her that day thinking in my mind there was something wrong with me. I swore I thought my toungue was going to fall off. (it was sore for days afterwards) I finally got Her to come.

Since that time, She has experienced many different forms of orgasms thru my manipulations. From what I would call simple orgasms to the point of uncontrollable squirting, and many ranges in between. I've pretty much have gotten Her to the point of where I can make Her come now by a mere touch.


The point I'm trying to make here is. It took many years to teach Her the fine point of cumming. She had always had difficulty cumming. I took Her from having that difficulty and opened the door to where She can come in many different ways now. It's really made Her sex life more enjoyable I get great pleasure in servicing Her in this way, but the main point is that She is the one that derives the full pleasure from it. She has learned the ways of controling my manipulations to give Her the orgasms that She now desires. (hard to explain hope it came across right).

 

[rexfelis]

Kailey, you really do sound like you're trying to rush. Your Sir and his slave have been together for how long, do you know? I bet you anything you want to bet, if she can come on command, it's over 6-12 months. I have a slave too, and she's been working on that for a long time, and STILL can't come from a cold start. She's endlessly orgasmic once I get her going, and getting her going is easy, but she cannot yet come from a cold start. I'm talking nearly a year of training here!

Stop trying to compare yourself to her. She's got a different body. If he has accepted you as his, I'm sure he understands that too. It's not a competition... you're not trying to be "as good as". Accept that your body is different, and let him work with you how he sees fit. Maybe he likes the contrast of your fewer orgasms to his slave's... maybe he just hasn't had a chance to work with you much yet. If you're in a long distance relationship, that's probably it.

You seem to have the natural urge to be impatient and have everything at once. You remind me of a woman who's working on becoming my slave right now. She's impatient as hell, and that's the main thing I'm trying to teach her... patience. You have to take the time to do things right, or you can get hurt. In this case, having unrealistic expectations can have negative effects on your self esteem and self image. So I'll suggest to you what I tell her all the time... Be patient, and let him do it in his own way. If he has a slave, I'm sure she has to trust him a lot for her to be with him, and you have met him... if he seems worthy of your trust... then relax, and trust that he will make it the way he wants things to be.

Besides, not all women can orgasm easily, regardless of stimulation, and if he's half the man it takes to really be a good Master, he will understand and accept that fact.

 

[catalina_francisco]

I know I am probably stepping on dangerous ground, but I still feel alarm bells when you speak of this relationship Kailey. I am aware some of it comes from knowing you only discovered D/s a few months ago, you were a virgin until this meeting, posted a personal for a Dom in mid-late September and within a day if I remember correctly (I could be confusing you here though, but I don't think so) you had accepted this man as it. If I remember correctly you also thought you might have difficulty with him being poly and your already feeling you have to be like the other slave is what many warned you about in terms of how to be in a poly relationship and not fall into this trap of comparisons and trying to be a clone so you feel you have an equal position at least.

I hope you used protection when you were with them as there are many STD's you can get through oral, hand, and genital contact without there being any visible signs you should be careful with a partner. If you are intimate with more than one person, or someone who is intimate with another, you are also increasing risks in this area. Did anyone have a legitimate sexual health test before you got together. It seems from the little of what you have told us of the meeting that most things related to SM did not happen even though you had expected them to from what he had lead you to believe, and what did happen was with things you bought, not what he or they provided...and most of the activity that was instigated by him seemed to be based around sex.

This is none of my business so feel free to tell me that, but it rings loud alarm bells for me given you are very young, you are innocent to a large degree, and you did not want something based on sex only or mostly sexual. It seems that is what has happened. Every Dom I ever met and played with kept to what they said would happen, provided equipment and planned what they would do with it, and in so doing made me feel they were involved and wanting the experience to be good for both of us, not me having to give them things to use on me or else nothing would happen except sex. You said you provided the crop, bondage set and gag that were used, and you even bought the egg he used on you...did he provide anything or do anything SM wise you did not have to initiate by buying something and giving it to him? Did he provide anything at all for the activities you engaged in or were you expected to pay for it all even though you are a student? Did you get to keep those things you bought or are they now with him and his slave? In the interests of health, do those things you bought get shared by both you and hios slave, and perhaps anyone else they might play with? If they are shared, once again you are increasing your health risks. I am not meaning to be hard on you or upset you, but I am seriously concerned about the motivation he has for the relationship as I would not like to see you used in a bad way you did not expect or deserve. You seem to be wanting to go in the right direction for you, but I am not seeing anything to show he is willing to put any effort in guiding you in that direction except with pretty flowery words, phrases and promises, and sex. Forgive me if I am wrong, I am just concerned you might be taken advantage of.

Catalina

 

[Zinfandel]

I agree that catalina's post #16 in this thread is very wise. And I should say too that I'm very impressed by the caring, sincere and knowledgeable guidance that has been offered in this thread.

 

[FurryFury]

*HUG*

Zinfandel, you have been very honest about a lot here. I applaud you.

If my husband doesn't come it really, really bothers me as well. For us it's usually a question of him being over tired after 13+ hours of work and low or no sleep. So now I avoid that. When it does happen I try to remember that it's not me but though I know that intellectually, my heart feels that I failed. I try to give him the same lack of pressure and acceptance he gave me when I was having trouble coming. It's not easy to do. It's something I strive for.

Fury

 

[Zinfandel]

*HUG*

Zinfandel, you have been very honest about a lot here. I applaud you.

Thank you Fury I fear judgement so much in the real world, but online I'm able to let go of it somewhat and talk more openly.

When it does happen I try to remember that it's not me but though I know that intellectually, my heart feels that I failed.

I know exactly what that feels like, and I feel so much for you. *Hugs back*

I try to give him the same lack of pressure and acceptance he gave me when I was having trouble coming. It's not easy to do. It's something I strive for.

It ISN'T easy at all, I agree. It's something I fail at far too often. Reading this thread today was a good reminder for me.

 

[myinnerslut]

I've had the same experience as others here with oral contraceptives. I have a strong sex drive when on birth control, but when I'm off it I have a VERY strong sex drive. There is a very noticeable difference.

i didnt know birth control could lower your sex drive. i didnt know the part about vitamin c either. hmm, the things you learn..

i've been on birth control sincei was 12 for medical reasons, and my sex drive is very big (Sir calls me insatiable sometimes). im almost scared to think what it would be like if i went off of birth control.


and kailey, learning anything just takes time, practice, and commitment. im sure youll be able to work with your body, i just have no idea how long it may take you to get to where you want to be.

 

[the captians wench]

*HUG*

Zinfandel, you have been very honest about a lot here. I applaud you.

If my husband doesn't come it really, really bothers me as well. For us it's usually a question of him being over tired after 13+ hours of work and low or no sleep. So now I avoid that. When it does happen I try to remember that it's not me but though I know that intellectually, my heart feels that I failed. I try to give him the same lack of pressure and acceptance he gave me when I was having trouble coming. It's not easy to do. It's something I strive for.

Fury

I get that way when my partner doesn't come from oral. I love giving oral and tend to take pride in my skill, but I have one play partner who doesn't tend to cum from oral. The very first time I blew him he came and it surprized him, but I have yet to repeat that (or I may have once but deffinitly not often). And the one time he just didn't cum at all. I felt very inadiquit and like there must be something wrong with me.

Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever expressed these feelings before. Which is really odd for me.

 

[FurryFury]

I get that way when my partner doesn't come from oral. I love giving oral and tend to take pride in my skill, but I have one play partner who doesn't tend to cum from oral. The very first time I blew him he came and it surprized him, but I have yet to repeat that (or I may have once but deffinitly not often). And the one time he just didn't cum at all. I felt very inadiquit and like there must be something wrong with me.

Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever expressed these feelings before. Which is really odd for me.

I can empathize. Oral is not my husband's thing at all. He doesn't come from it though I've made it almost a holy mission over the years. *L*

This also made me remember another reason why changing positions constantly got to me. Other than worry about falling down, or how I looked, I kept thinking, clearly I'm not doing it for him, so he has to keep trying different positions to get excited but none of them are working. I was wrong about all that but insecurity again caused problems. He simply likes to feel me in different positions. He also likes to draw it out some. Meanwhile I'm thinking I look like a fat hag from hell.

Thank God he is understanding and patient with me! Even when it takes me years to get something out in the open. That rarely happens now but I hated to talk about this stuff at the beginning of our relationship.

One other thing about coming on command the title of this thread; I would love to do that. I've been sort of working on it in my own head anytime I masturbate or have sex. What I don't want is to become so conditioned that I find it difficult to come on my own or with my husband. That wouldn't be good. I've read that can happen if the relationship ends.

Fury

 

[the captians wench]

I can empathize. Oral is not my husband's thing at all. He doesn't come from it though I've made it almost a holy mission over the years. *L*

This also made me remember another reason why changing positions constantly got to me. Other than worry about falling down, or how I looked, I kept thinking, clearly I'm not doing it for him, so he has to keep trying different positions to get excited but none of them are working. I was wrong about all that but insecurity again caused problems. He simply likes to feel me in different positions. He also likes to draw it out some. Meanwhile I'm thinking I look like a fat hag from hell.

Thank God he is understanding and patient with me! Even when it takes me years to get something out in the open. That rarely happens now but I hated to talk about this stuff at the beginning of our relationship.

One other thing about coming on command the title of this thread; I would love to do that. I've been sort of working on it in my own head anytime I masturbate or have sex. What I don't want is to become so conditioned that I find it difficult to come on my own or with my husband. That wouldn't be good. I've read that can happened if the relationship ends.

Fury

I know what you mean. Oh and one time when my ex and I were trying something new he dropped me, flat on me arse. God did that cause some instant dieting!

I've noticed with me, it's a certian pitch and tone that does it. Anyone with that pitch or tone in their voice whether they do it intentionally or not will get me going. ...Did I mention a certian some one speaks with that pitch naturally?

 

[Kailey_86]

I know I am probably stepping on dangerous ground, but I still feel alarm bells when you speak of this relationship Kailey. I am aware some of it comes from knowing you only discovered D/s a few months ago, you were a virgin until this meeting, posted a personal for a Dom in mid-late September and within a day if I remember correctly (I could be confusing you here though, but I don't think so) you had accepted this man as it.

i did put up a personal looking for a Dom and i said i had found one the next day because i was bombarded with PMs and IMs and i wanted to sort through them without getting more. i started talking to several Doms and finally figured out that i would start a more serious relationship with my current Dom about a month after i posted the personal.

If I remember correctly you also thought you might have difficulty with him being poly and your already feeling you have to be like the other slave is what many warned you about in terms of how to be in a poly relationship and not fall into this trap of comparisons and trying to be a clone so you feel you have an equal position at least.

i am having some difficulties with the poly thing but it is something i am willing to work on and get over. i really like His slave and i We get along wonderfully. We both just aren't used to having to share a man.

I hope you used protection when you were with them as there are many STD's you can get through oral, hand, and genital contact without there being any visible signs you should be careful with a partner. If you are intimate with more than one person, or someone who is intimate with another, you are also increasing risks in this area. Did anyone have a legitimate sexual health test before you got together.

They have both had tests done several times and they are both clean.

It seems from the little of what you have told us of the meeting that most things related to SM did not happen even though you had expected them to from what he had lead you to believe, and what did happen was with things you bought, not what he or they provided...and most of the activity that was instigated by him seemed to be based around sex.

We did do some things relating to SM but this meeting was more to get to know each other which is what happened. i really enjoyed spending time with them and learning about them more intimately. He didn't lead me to believe anything. He was completely honest about what was going to happen. We did use the toys i bought but we also did things without them.

This is none of my business so feel free to tell me that, but it rings loud alarm bells for me given you are very young, you are innocent to a large degree, and you did not want something based on sex only or mostly sexual. It seems that is what has happened. Every Dom I ever met and played with kept to what they said would happen, provided equipment and planned what they would do with it, and in so doing made me feel they were involved and wanting the experience to be good for both of us, not me having to give them things to use on me or else nothing would happen except sex. You said you provided the crop, bondage set and gag that were used, and you even bought the egg he used on you...did he provide anything or do anything SM wise you did not have to initiate by buying something and giving it to him? Did he provide anything at all for the activities you engaged in or were you expected to pay for it all even though you are a student?

This is our decision. There are certain circumstances that wouldn't allow Him to pay for them. He didn't ask or tell me to buy the toys, i offered since i wanted them too.

Did you get to keep those things you bought or are they now with him and his slave?

i kept them.

In the interests of health, do those things you bought get shared by both you and hios slave, and perhaps anyone else they might play with? If they are shared, once again you are increasing your health risks.

We are aware of the health risks and are taking precautions to prevent them. Like i said, they are both clean and so am i.

I am not meaning to be hard on you or upset you, but I am seriously concerned about the motivation he has for the relationship as I would not like to see you used in a bad way you did not expect or deserve. You seem to be wanting to go in the right direction for you, but I am not seeing anything to show he is willing to put any effort in guiding you in that direction except with pretty flowery words, phrases and promises, and sex. Forgive me if I am wrong, I am just concerned you might be taken advantage of.

He is taking very good care of me. He isn't taking advantage of me. There was one issue that i was concerned with but we talked about it and worked it out. He cares for me and wants me to be the best i can be. He is teaching me and helping me strengthen my weaknesses. He is helping me grow. There is a lot more to our relationship that you don't see here on Lit obviously. i come to Lit when i have questions or when i am curious about what others are doing in similar situations. This means you only see my concerns and worries. A lot of the time people don't seem to read my posts correctly. i honestly am not rushing this coming on command thing. i really am just curious about it. i am very happy with Sir. i wouldn't stay if i wasn't happy, if i was being taken advantage of, or if i didn't feel that i was safe.

i appreciate your concern. i really do. It's nice to know that you care about me. *hug* Thank you for watching out for me.

 

[shaymless]

Nuvaring/sex drive

I didn't have reduced sex drive while I was using the Nuva Ring, but some women have, from what I remember when I researched it. So I'd guess it's like anything else - gotta try it and see what it does But I was allowed on the Nuva Ring because it was a bit lower risk than other hormonal bc methods (and I was over 35 and smoke), so logic would follow that *that* particular side effect would be reduced also. But I am not a medical professional, so can't say that for fact.

shay

 

[Kailey_86]

Kailey, you really do sound like you're trying to rush. Your Sir and his slave have been together for how long, do you know? I bet you anything you want to bet, if she can come on command, it's over 6-12 months. I have a slave too, and she's been working on that for a long time, and STILL can't come from a cold start. She's endlessly orgasmic once I get her going, and getting her going is easy, but she cannot yet come from a cold start. I'm talking nearly a year of training here!

i really don't mean to sound like i am rushing. Like i have said before, i was curious about how others have experienced this. i wanted to know if people who have the same difficulty as i do with cumming were able to eventually come on command. i KNOW this won't happen over night. i KNOW it takes time.

Stop trying to compare yourself to her. She's got a different body. If he has accepted you as his, I'm sure he understands that too. It's not a competition... you're not trying to be "as good as". Accept that your body is different, and let him work with you how he sees fit. Maybe he likes the contrast of your fewer orgasms to his slave's... maybe he just hasn't had a chance to work with you much yet. If you're in a long distance relationship, that's probably it.

i didn't think of the fact that He might like the differences between her and i. i still do wish i could cum easier. This isn't comparing myself to her though. Even if she weren't there, i still would wish the same thing.

You seem to have the natural urge to be impatient and have everything at once. You remind me of a woman who's working on becoming my slave right now. She's impatient as hell, and that's the main thing I'm trying to teach her... patience. You have to take the time to do things right, or you can get hurt. In this case, having unrealistic expectations can have negative effects on your self esteem and self image. So I'll suggest to you what I tell her all the time... Be patient, and let him do it in his own way. If he has a slave, I'm sure she has to trust him a lot for her to be with him, and you have met him... if he seems worthy of your trust... then relax, and trust that he will make it the way he wants things to be.

This is true. i do realize that i have trouble with impatience and i am trying to work on that however i don't think this is what is going on here. Like i said, i wasn't rushing this, just curious about it.

Besides, not all women can orgasm easily, regardless of stimulation, and if he's half the man it takes to really be a good Master, he will understand and accept that fact.

He is definately more than half the man it takes to be a really good Master. He is accepting of me. It is me who is not so accepting of me. He is helping me work on my self-esteem though. i am getting there. Slowly but surely.

 

[catalina_francisco]

i appreciate your concern. i really do. It's nice to know that you care about me. *hug* Thank you for watching out for me.

That's one of the nicest things I have found about this forum...people really do care what happens to each other and are there for you when things go bad in whatever area of your life. Surprisingly, if one of us gets into trouble it seems that even if someone is not particularly fond of us or on the same wavelength, they will be supportive and protective when needed. I don't see that happen on most other BDSM related forums.

Catalina

 

[CutieMouse]

Damnit Kailey, honey- you are more than your 'effing orgasms! (and I agree 100% with the others who have said that the other people involved in the relationship might not be rushing things, but you are.)

There are eleventy million ways a woman can enjoy intimacy- without climaxing.

There are eleventy milion ways a man can enjoy a woman's body- without her climaxing.

The more you learn to embrace the journey, and not worry about the final destination, the more likely you are to reach the final destination.

I've never had a problem climaxing- ever; I would occasionally have several orgasms one right after the other. I probably still could if I chose to, but have been without a partner for *looks at clock* ... two years last Thursday, and I really don't know what my "state of the union" is these days, regarding climaxing [with a partner]; I honestly don't care. Anyone who Loves me, will enjoy the intimate journey; climaxes will come as we learn to explore each other, and grow comfortable sitting inside each other's souls. (for the record I've had a grand total of 4 Lovers, and am in my mid-30s)

I have a dear-heart bestest friend (and once upon a time Lover) who has always struggled with climaxing [with a partner]. Until receintly (she's the same age as me), she'd never had a multiple orgasm. It was a big deal to climax with a partner, period. (she's had way way waaay more Lovers than I)

Neither one of us has ever had a partner who didn't enjoy the time we spent together. We both very much enjoy sex. It took each of us years and years to learn to enjoy our bodies enough that climaxes became bonuses, rather than goals... and interestingly enough, once that occured, they happened quite a bit more easily.

I hate to sound ageist, but there is no way in HELL I'd attempt climaxing on command at your age.

A) you are young enough that you are still fighting your body, instead of embracing it.

B) we all want to belive our first Lover will be out last Lover, but odds are he ain't gonna be your last Lover. If y'all are still together a year or two down the road- THEN discuss the idea.

C) if you achieve this self-appointed "goal" of climaxing on command- what happens when the relationship ends, and you are either left alone trying to retrain your mind, or find it necessary to explain to a future Lover, that you can only relax enough to climax when he says/does X? Look at the big picture, not the neato cool parlor trick his other Lover can do.

 

[Etoile]

I didn't have reduced sex drive while I was using the Nuva Ring, but some women have, from what I remember when I researched it. So I'd guess it's like anything else - gotta try it and see what it does But I was allowed on the Nuva Ring because it was a bit lower risk than other hormonal bc methods (and I was over 35 and smoke), so logic would follow that *that* particular side effect would be reduced also. But I am not a medical professional, so can't say that for fact.

shay

Interesting - I never heard anything about NuvaRing affecting sex drive. I've been using it for almost a year now after 5 years on Depo Provera. (Great for controlling periods...really bad for your bones. You're not supposed to be on Depo more than 2 years.)

And for the record, I love NuvaRing. It's almost easier than the Depo shot, though I do have to take it out before my wife plays with me - she doesn't like feeling the plastic where she expects to feel nothing but girl flesh. I was worried that there would be spotting on the NuvaRing (I had no period on Depo) but I haven't even had that much. It's really awesome if you need to control periods.

But that has nothing to do with coming on command, so I'm going to go now...

 

[Miss Diva]

Interesting - I never heard anything about NuvaRing affecting sex drive. I've been using it for almost a year now after 5 years on Depo Provera. (Great for controlling periods...really bad for your bones. You're not supposed to be on Depo more than 2 years.)

And for the record, I love NuvaRing. It's almost easier than the Depo shot, though I do have to take it out before my wife plays with me - she doesn't like feeling the plastic where she expects to feel nothing but girl flesh. I was worried that there would be spotting on the NuvaRing (I had no period on Depo) but I haven't even had that much. It's really awesome if you need to control periods.

But that has nothing to do with coming on command, so I'm going to go now...

I am using the NuvaRing also and I have to take it out before sex also. He felt that it was a barrier for him during sex. And my periods have really been heavy since I have been on it. But I find it ok otherwise.

M

 

[Kailey_86]

Alright folks, i am getting rather frustrated here. Let me get this straight: I...AM...NOT...RUSHING!! Why can't i just come here and ask a question to learn? That is all i am trying to do. i am NOT going to attempt to cum on command at any time in the near future. i am NOT expecting anything. i asked a question. i am thinking about this for the future. It's a possibility, just like everything else, and i am curious about it. It might not be right for me, it might be too early for me, i might be too young...it doesn't matter, i am simply wondering about it.

CutieMouse, i KNOW i am more than my orgasms. i KNOW there are other ways to enjoy my sexuality. This isn't THAT important to me, it's just the focus of this thread.

Edit to add: i appreciate everyone's concern. i really do. i am getting frustrated though because i am here to learn and i feel like people are telling me that i shouldn't be doing this or that. i don't see other people getting this sort of concern. i am a strong and intelligent woman. i may be young and inexperienced. i realize that you might see something that i don't. Still, i am not being stupid about this. i am being careful. That is why i am here. Before i do anything i research it. That is all this is. Harmless questioning. There is no action. Action comes later...much later.

 

[FurryFury]

Isn't it nice how some doctors don't think it necessary to tell people of the possible side effects of medication?!! I swear, I have learned more without asking from the pharmacist filling the prescription than the doctors. One thing they don't mention is how while taking the pill you can get pregnant if you use certain cough mixtures and medications, taking certain doses of Vitamin C and drinking lots of orange juice. all of which can make the pill redundant. My daughter was on a health kick and drinking loads of juice when she fell pregnant....I told her what I knew and when she asked the doctors, they agreed that the amopunt she had been drinking while healthy in other ways, had almost certainly made it possible to fall pregant despite taking the pill.

Catalina

In that case I've been very lucky in only conceiving when I wanted to.

Fury

 

[Etoile]

I am using the NuvaRing also and I have to take it out before sex also. He felt that it was a barrier for him during sex. And my periods have really been heavy since I have been on it. But I find it ok otherwise.

M

I should note that I wear the NuvaRing continuously, I don't take a week off - that's why I have no periods. (Which is the reason I have it in the first place! But don't tell my insurance company that.)

I do have experience with not taking it out before sex...we inadvertently ended up playing "horseshoes" almost! We pulled out the dildo...and the ring was around it! (I'd forgotten it was there, as I usually do.)

 

[rexfelis]

Alright folks, i am getting rather frustrated here. Let me get this straight: I...AM...NOT...RUSHING!! Why can't i just come here and ask a question to learn? That is all i am trying to do. i am NOT going to attempt to cum on command at any time in the near future. i am NOT expecting anything. i asked a question. i am thinking about this for the future. It's a possibility, just like everything else, and i am curious about it. It might not be right for me, it might be too early for me, i might be too young...it doesn't matter, i am simply wondering about it.

CutieMouse, i KNOW i am more than my orgasms. i KNOW there are other ways to enjoy my sexuality. This isn't THAT important to me, it's just the focus of this thread.

Edit to add: i appreciate everyone's concern. i really do. i am getting frustrated though because i am here to learn and i feel like people are telling me that i shouldn't be doing this or that. i don't see other people getting this sort of concern. i am a strong and intelligent woman. i may be young and inexperienced. i realize that you might see something that i don't. Still, i am not being stupid about this. i am being careful. That is why i am here. Before i do anything i research it. That is all this is. Harmless questioning. There is no action. Action comes later...much later.

Kailey, you are young and inexperienced and we all know how easy it is to get taken advantage of and hurt when you're in that place. Calm down. We're just trying to help. I think part of the problem is that you do like I do sometimes, thinking faster than you write and then forgetting that you haven't necessarily filled in all the blanks for eveything else. People understand what you write, but they only have what you've written to go on.