Dear X:

[Salenku]

Dear x,

A Facebook request? Really? I think not. Oh, alright then, but you're restricted, and I can see yours and laugh that things are going badly for you. Sorry to be blunt, but you were a total bitch-cunt when we last spoke, and likely still are.

Please don't ever try to speak to me in a club or bar, thanks.

S

 

[Salenku]

Dear x,

It pains me to know that I made you feel less than you are. If there is anything I ever wanted for you, it was for you to understand your inherent worth.

I am sorry for that.

*hugs* dealing with a hurt ex is hard...

 

[Scentofawoman]

Dear X,

You're still writing me. Every 4 months a little quick note with a sweet endearment. I like it. It's very flattering. Sadly you're not getting my subtle hints it has to stop. I'm just not into you anymore.

Regretfully yours

 

[Stella_Omega]

Dear X,

You're still writing me. Every 4 months a little quick note with a sweet endearment. I like it. It's very flattering. Sadly you're not getting my subtle hints it has to stop. I'm just not into you anymore.

Regretfully yours

Subtle? You thought that would work?

Testosterone doesn't do subtle, babe. Kind, yes-- but firm and specific.

 

[Scentofawoman]

Subtle? You thought that would work?

Testosterone doesn't do subtle, babe. Kind, yes-- but firm and specific.

*sigh* Really it's sweet and he's a nice guy.

How about:
Dude it's over. Get the fuck outta my life?

 

[Stella_Omega]

*sigh* Really it's sweet and he's a nice guy.

How about:
Dude it's over. Get the fuck outta my life?

Isn't there anything in between?
--
How about what you posted in the first place, verbatim?

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

*hugs* dealing with a hurt ex is hard...

Thanks.

Who made up this system of personal growth? 'Cause I think it's time for an annual review.

 

[sheablue]

Dear X:

We met online. This does not mean you know me. I do not know you. Yes, it's unfortunate that I confided in you that one time at a very low moment. I regret it. I've learned my lesson. But if you were a real Dom, you would know this: just because I am submissive does not mean I want to submit to you. I don't. I never will. I don't just "need space to figure things out." I don't want to go to Florida with you for three days. I DON'T KNOW YOU!

Also, I will not be convinced by photographs of your admittedly very large cock. Please stop sending them. The fact that you identify so much of yourself with your penis is yet another red flag.

I've had enough of cyberdouchebaggery for this month. I'm all full up. Go away. Thanks.

 

[satindesire]

Dear X:

We met online. This does not mean you know me. I do not know you. Yes, it's unfortunate that I confided in you that one time at a very low moment. I regret it. I've learned my lesson. But if you were a real Dom, you would know this: just because I am submissive does not mean I want to submit to you. I don't. I never will. I don't just "need space to figure things out." I don't want to go to Florida with you for three days. I DON'T KNOW YOU!

Also, I will not be convinced by photographs of your admittedly very large cock. Please stop sending them. The fact that you identify so much of yourself with your penis is yet another red flag.

I've had enough of cyberdouchebaggery for this month. I'm all full up. Go away. Thanks.

HAH! He sounds like a fantastic candidate for the Asshat Awards thread.

Also:

Hey Men, Listen Up! (No More Penis Pics!) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7CxgpevKuU

 

[Stella_Omega]

Dear Lady Friend;

I really appreciate your honesty. You are going through some shit plus breast cancer, yes indeed, and I am only going through shit-- minus breast cancer. But that does not mean that my shit isn't painful and throwing me off my game, and if you really think the right thing for you to do is tell me to show up in two weeks for your birthday and be all better by then?

Well that's good to know. I mean, good for me to know that's the way you operate.

Ciao. Really. No, nu-uh. Doneskis.

 

[kiwi_submissive]

Dear X,

Happy Friendiversary. Well not sure of the exact date but it must be close.

To say that I have been incredibly lucky to have you in my life over the last two years would be somewhat of an understatement. You have helped me through so much and listened to my whinging and given great advice and also made me laugh so much.

I hope that I have given you at least half of what you have given me and that you know you are never far from my thoughts.

And please don't forget that you can whinge to me any time you want to or need to.

Me

 

[blulilacgrl]

HAH! He sounds like a fantastic candidate for the Asshat Awards thread.

Also:

Hey Men, Listen Up! (No More Penis Pics!) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7CxgpevKuU

Oh LMFAO!

Thank you for that PSA. I am dyin' over here!! You should definitely post this to the PM Asshattery Thread.

*still giggling*

 

[satindesire]

Dear Ex-Boyfriends,

I don't really know why you guys always treat me like absolute dog-shit, then when I dump your sorry asses after warning you that I will if you don't straighten out, you guys always come looking after me after a few years wanting to know if I'm single.

I guess it's kinda hard to find another woman as patient, giving, sexually responsive and affectionate as me, huh? Maybe You Fuckers Should Have Been Nicer To Me When You Had The Chance.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Dear K,

You say, so casually, "Why don't you call your doctor?" and are surprised when the answer is "Because I don't have one," and you are paying top dollar for health insurance and I know that you're self-employed, and oh, my heart just goes out to you, darlin. You don't know what it's like to be poor. Not yet. You are not going to like it. You've done everything right-- but it's not going to be enough.

I'm so sorry, I am so sorry.

 

[NikiCole]

Dear Spring,
Get over yourself, stop peeking your head out, then go back into hiding. I need sun on my lily white legs!! So man up and get on with it already.

Sincerely,
The pasty white chick waiting for the sun.

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

Dear x,

Happy two years.

Thank you for all the deep conversations, the laughs, the silliness, the listening to me complain.

The universe really had my back when we first bumped into each other.

 

[satindesire]

Dear Spring,
Get over yourself, stop peeking your head out, then go back into hiding. I need sun on my lily white legs!! So man up and get on with it already.

Sincerely,
The pasty white chick waiting for the sun.

Dear Niki,

The sun is baaaad for you suge. Self tanner is the way to go!

Don't look like a leather handbag by the time you're 40, wear your sunscreen and you'll thank me later when you're not dosing yourself with peels every week for wrinkles!

 

[knot_sweet]

Dear universe.

Thanks.

I needed the reminder that I am more than I have been for a while now.

Feels good.

Cheers for that and the tasty sammich.

Gratefully yours
k_s

 

[kindtemptress]

Dear X:

Even though I almost pissed myself laughing when you said it, I still am puzzled by the fact that you think Im jealous of you.
I finished HS, I didnt drop out 3 months before graduation.
I have a job and dont rely on my bf to sell pot in order to buy me things.
I pay my own bills, not have my bf buy me a cell phone (and then he turns around and sells it btw).
I have my own place, I dont live with my "fiance" and his mom.
So please, tell me again that Im jealous of you.
You need to grow the fuck up and realize just how immature you act and sound, the world owes you nothing, get off your ass and do something with your life instead of expecting everyone to hand you things.

Love Ya
~KT

 

[Sir_Winston54]

Dear X,

I know my situation is incredibly stressful for you, that stress is making you physically ill, and I wish there were some way to make all this easier to bear. I wish, too, that I could show you how much your caring means to me, and that I could ease the heartpain you feel.

 

[Salenku]

Dear X,

I know my situation is incredibly stressful for you, that stress is making you physically ill, and I wish there were some way to make all this easier to bear. I wish, too, that I could show you how much your caring means to me, and that I could ease the heartpain you feel.

*huggles*

 

[NikiCole]

Dear life,
(((((HUGS)))) It seems like you need it.

 

[Ropebunny]

Dear back,

I don't know what kind of game you think you're playing with me but I don't like it. Sneaking up on me while vacuuming like that was cruel and I'm struggling to forgive you. I'm still ashamed that you made me cry with pain and fear last night. I just don't have time for this sort of behaviour.

Quit this goddamned nonsence and give me my mobility back!!!

 

[gypsy*seer]

Dear Dad,
It's been 16 years since you were elevated to the great beyond....
Miss you very much, and sometimes it's so hard...especially today, for many reasons.
<3

 

[Stella_Omega]

(((hugs))) for everyone-- very, very careful ((hugs)) for Ropebunny.