Desultory and Impulsive

I don't say that out of personal dismay. Not this time anyway

But rather in the sense of how that's a long time to have people drifting into and out of your life.
 
It's a real struggle when one individual takes up so much real estate in your mind particularly that of which they do not deserve.

The pretty vistas that should have been left untouched

It's an emotional swindling where they come along, offer you a great deal you'd be a sucker to pass up. Then they walk away having raped the land leaving a half completed McMansion and partially covered half collapsed stack of lumber slowly being warped by the elements. Next to it a pile of back fill gravel succumbing to weed growth and a sign "Lots For Sale. Great Opportunity!"
 
Having lived and grown up in the country I've come to see that happen a lot. Farm land, swaths of lake property owned with no generation to pass it down to. Or... passed down only to have it plotted off and developed.

It's always such a double edge. You hate to see it happen. But you understand.

I like the big signs that show all the property lotted off.

I like looking at them. Particularly if I know the land. "Tresspassed" it as a child, playing adventurer with my friends.

I will look at each layed out lot and go "oh my god... that's a GREAT piece of land!" And part of me wishes I could be that child I once was when we used to claim such for ourselves just by placing a stick in the ground.

I will then look at the next lot and do the same thing.

Each lot a little compartmentalized memory
 
Tonight was cold

But now
I am laying
Next to her

Naked.

As she sleeps
I am thinking about
My tomorrow with her.

My tomorrow.

The day I fuck
The voice of her throat
With my cock.
 
Her mouth
Her throat

She feels so good around me

Her heavy breasts
Becoming slick
With the saliva
My erect flesh
Plumbs out from her lips

Her hand
Scooping up
What she can of it
And using it as lube

Giving her jaw a rest
Before taking me
Back into her
With ball licking whore reckless abandon
Bringing me to the edge
Only stopping
When I pull her head back
By her hair

Hand raised
Ready to slap
That coy smirk smile
Off her face
 
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But laying her back instead

Legs spreading
In order to receive
My orgasm

The way
I want to give it.
 
There's been a bit of change of plans. I worked today and I'm really not feeling what I wrote last night.

Instead I'm kinda more in the mood of something warm soft and nice. Like... burying my face in the crack of her crotch and ass while she lays face down on the bed; propping herself up by her elbows and pillow, reading one of her romance novels on her e-reader of choice--as she has many.

Doesn't that sound fuck-all fucking fantastic?

Yes.
Yes it does.
 
Coffee Thoughts

I've been doing some early morning thinking on behalf of all you women

Whilst drinking my coffee I got to thinking the safest sexual experience a woman can have is probably that of a gangbang involving 3 or more men.

It's an extreme situation yes but the level of personal male accountability and the preservation of female integrity increases.

With one guy a woman is pretty much just left on her own. Two guys is pretty sketchy where if the women says no to something and a guy agrees with her but still wants to get laid the other guy who doesn't give a shit what she wants or doesn't want can easily convince the guy on the fence to stop being a pussy and hold the bitch down.

If there's a third guy the woman will most likely have a strong advocate with a want to keep the party going in her favor.

I am sure my reasoning is flawed

I think it stems from a number of interviews I've listened to on the Holly Randall podcast. Two that stood out the most was one with Sasha Grey where she more or less said she pursued porn because she wanted a safe environment to explore her sexuality. The other was a rather boring but still interesting one with London River who had/has a very active interest in masochism and bondage. In the interview she explained how she was trying to pursue her interests online. Name dropped Fetlife. Told the story of how she was DMing with a guy and at the zero hour of hooking up had a moment of... how do I know this guy isn't a psychopath that just wants to hurt women? She cancelled and like Sasha sought to pursue her interest via the porn industry.

We all know who Sasha Grey is.

For those that aren't familiar with London jump into the deep end and Google "London River Closing Up The Hole" and ask yourself--if that women doesn't trust her safety with the types of men on Fetlife should any woman?
 
So....

What's a woman to do?

Say a woman wants to be choked during sex. Or perhaps as a part of foreplay.

It's a gamble if she floats the idea to the man she is with as men are either all in or they are all out.

If they are all out judgements might be made. The woman is fucked in the head. Probably has daddy issues or something.

If they are all in then a precedent is set and an assumption is made that choking is green lighted for every sexual interaction with her there-on out.
 
All the women I want to fuck but don't want to fuck me love The Deftones.

I am curious as to why.
 
With
My lips closed
Around the flesh of her breast
And
My tongue
Cradling her nipple

I sucked


I sucked hard

Mindful
With no teeth

The pain
I wanted her to feel
Was complex force

Not
Simple
Mindlessness

I smash my face into her
Suffocating myself
Then drew my head back
Slowly
Feeling the contradiction
Of the soft flesh of her breast
And that of her erect nipple
Marry together
Within the confines
Of my warm wet mouth

Small capillaries
Spiderwebbing
Beneath her skin
Bursting
Like quiet fireworks
Far off into the night sky.
 
But I don't just want to do that

I want to be with her
Feel her

Her body
Against me
Soliciting a desire
So strong
I wish time would stop
And our death
Would be in such beauty
Like a gift
Being opened
The end result
A rebirth
In the form of ejaculation
And acceptance

Acceptance of each other
And of life flawed
Imperfect
Struggling
To put an end
To our lust

And failing.
 
To take her
And give her no choice
But to feel
The full weight
Of my body
Cushing her
Against the ground
The mattress
The gravel of some backwoods country road where her screams fall deaf upon the crimson yellow leaves of an autumn maple tree.

I want her there like that
Below me
Wet
Gaping
Being used by my dick and fingers
Two inside her
Three
Four
Poking and pressing
And assaulting her body
And insulting her senses
Disorienting
Confusing
Surfing the edge of blacking out
And pissing herself

Blood raw
Ripped clothing
Agony and tears
Gasping to escape
Grasping to not be let go
 
To do all this to her

Like I write my words
Right now
Without thought
Or care of mistake

Lost in the moment

God...
Right now

This passion
This desire
To just... smash.
 
I'm pretty fucking full up with the new metallica song.

Seriously. Metallica. Remember when your music used to have bite to it?
 
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