Do any of you drink/do drugs while playing?

[catalina_francisco]

For us drugs are never a part of our lives, and drinking is a rarity, my even rarer forays existing of 2 glasses max. The rule we have, which I have found in all the Dominants I met and played with was if either had had so much as one drop of alcohol (or drugs, but then none of them were into that) there was no play happening. For me it is a safety issue, not a judgement....people usually drink or do drugs to take the edge off as the saying goes, which in reality means there is a risk to knowing when enough is enough. Not only is it a psychological risk in defining the limits, but can produce a variety of physical effects which inhibit the natural response making it easy for a submissive to agree to more when their body has had enough.

Catalina

 

[ownedsubgal]

my Master and i don't really have any qualms about drinking and playing, even with others. His only issue is if i drink too much to the point where i'm not coherent and can't stay awake (i'm the type to get sleepier and sleepier til i finally pass out cold when i get drunk)...that will effect my service, so he doesn't mind me drinking til just before i reach that point. whenever we are going to some social play event, a private party or club or what have you, he actually makes sure that i have a few drinks in my system because otherwise my shyness and social anxiety would cripple me and i wouldn't be much fun. He's not really a drinker himself, but he doesn't have issue with other men who have been drinking using me, as long as it's in his presence. it's true that alcohol dulls the senses, i can bear (without so much screaming and crying) a much more severe beating when i'm a bit intoxicated.

as for other drugs, that's a little different...the Dominant(s) using me has to be clean...but if i am given a little something to produce a certain desired effect in me, to better be of service or use....well, so be it.

 

[Netzach]

Depends what I'm doing. How's that for non-pc?

I wouldn't cane anyone after more than one glass of wine, and that a very shallow glass.

But I can have my toes licked while I'm ripped, I think that's ok.

 

[Georgia Girl]

If I drank anything alcoholic I'd sleep through EVERYTHING

A bit of coffee and I'm bouncing though

 

[landcruisergal]

Sex and drugs?
In my nilla relationships I have done most except for heroin, coke, and shrooms, whilst making de lurve.I am particularly partial to amyl nitrate and amphetamines.yum.Mary jane makes me too dry.
Bdsm tho, is very intense, and although a drink or two is ok, amyl wouldn't feel appropriate somehow. At one of the initial meetings I had with my master, I was very tired, having come off a night shift that morning, and wasnt to meet until 4pm, so I snorted some dexies(it just keeps me awake under normal circumstances). Not a good idea at all. I was very anxious anyway, and I honestly thought I was having a tachycardic episode, and I was close to freaking out. I didnt tell him at the time(which was foolish). But certainly hightened the experiance.It was wild fun, but I wouldnt go there again.
Another time he was coming over to my house for the first time and I was similarly stressed, mainly about my environment being invaded and what he would think etc etc so I took diazepam(valium). I like valium a lot and restrict it to the dentist and serious periods of stress.I know my weaknesses, you see.Was fine, but the next day hit an emotional overload of sorts, paranoid and crying my eyes out.So I will give both uppers and downers a wide birth.And besides, after confessing, he prohibits my usage now.Except for caffeine.But with a 'nilla lover, anything goes.

 

[thegreenfairy]

I like being stoned while I'm tied up. It adds to the surreal feeling and the surrendered control. But my bf once tried tying me up after I'd had absinthe and weed, and it was waaaaaaay too intense.

With a stranger, I think I'd err on the side of caution and have no more than a drink or two.

 

[catalina_francisco]

It is intereesting the number of submissives who use either drink or drugs to cope with or take the edge of a session or scene in some way. For us that would seem a way of cheating the Dominant of submission. He prefers cold turkey and authenticity for me no matter what he asks of me so he knows if he wants me to suffer, I will; if I am stressed, I will overcome that for him...just seems that is usually the baisis of submission, submitting rather than finding a way to deaden the effects of your Dominant's actions and commands. If he put me in a situation and I did not perform to his expectations it would be deemed as disobedience, or at best not fulfilling my obligation to always try my best to please. In other words the process is as important as the end product to him and I both.

Catalina

 

[James G 5]

It is intereesting the number of submissives who use either drink or drugs to cope with or take the edge of a session or scene in some way. For us that would seem a way of cheating the Dominant of submission. He prefers cold turkey and authenticity for me no matter what he asks of me so he knows if he wants me to suffer, I will; if I am stressed, I will overcome that for him...just seems that is usually the baisis of submission, submitting rather than finding a way to deaden the effects of your Dominant's actions and commands. If he put me in a situation and I did not perform to his expectations it would be deemed as disobedience, or at best not fulfilling my obligation to always try my best to please. In other words the process is as important as the end product to him and I both.

Catalina

Sounds to me more like the subs are cheating THEMSELVES of the wonderful places that such intense physcial overload can take them, mentally & spiritually
It's my attitude that if you "need" intoxicants to do something, maybe it's something you should reconsider doing

 

[catalina_francisco]

Sounds to me more like the subs are cheating THEMSELVES of the wonderful places that such intense physcial overload can take them, mentally & spiritually
It's my attitude that if you "need" intoxicants to do something, maybe it's something you should reconsider doing

Oh there you go again, agreeing with me!!! Yes, I do agree I think they are missing something which makes me wonder why when most here profess to enjoy the entire experience totally. If I love something, I certainly am not looking for a way to diminish the experience in any way. Maybe it is my perfectionist tendencies which always influence me to be a purist of sorts as in natural is best so why add something to contaminate the mix. LOL.

Catalina

 

[ownedsubgal]

It is intereesting the number of submissives who use either drink or drugs to cope with or take the edge of a session or scene in some way. For us that would seem a way of cheating the Dominant of submission. He prefers cold turkey and authenticity for me no matter what he asks of me so he knows if he wants me to suffer, I will; if I am stressed, I will overcome that for him...just seems that is usually the baisis of submission, submitting rather than finding a way to deaden the effects of your Dominant's actions and commands. If he put me in a situation and I did not perform to his expectations it would be deemed as disobedience, or at best not fulfilling my obligation to always try my best to please. In other words the process is as important as the end product to him and I both.

Catalina

with my Master, i have never "needed" anything, or wanted anything, to help "take the edge off" so to speak. the only purpose of me drinking, when i am permitted to drink, is to ease my social anxiety and nervousness, which otherwise would cripple me and make it impossible for me to relax in a public or very social sort of situation. it would hardly diminish the experience for me, whether it's bdsm related or purely sexual...if anything, it allows me to relax and be wholly myself, and not be wracked with needless anxieties. so, Daddy will give me a few drinks to calm me down. i've yet to use any other drugs with just my Master and i, but it's not out of the question...sometimes a drug can be a part of the experience...(think...some may enjoy using a submissive who is not "all there", or who is temporarily paralyzed and must be moved about like a ragdoll). there's a difference between this, and actually needing drugs of any kind to submit, or have sexual or bdsm experiences.

 

[catalina_francisco]

there's a difference between this, and actually needing drugs of any kind to submit, or have sexual or bdsm experiences.

Yes there is and I did not mean to infer a dependency. For us, it is a personal choice we have both had all our llives, even more so in the realm of BDSM, to not take part in substance abuse. Does not make us better or worse, just the way we prefer to live. Master expects me to work through my anxiety and angst to make him proud, and I suspect my sometimes inability to do so immediately, reducing me to a basketcase of sorts feeds his sadistic delight in the whole experience, as it feeds my masochism in kind.

Catalina

 

[BrightFlower]

I don't drink (alcohol)
I don't do drugs
I don't smoke (although He smokes)

Leaves lots more of me to do other things.....

 

[Prof Bill]

Playing while even remotely under the influence

Before I stopped drinking (and using), which was before I "found" D/s and BDSM, I frequently fucked while (or after) drinking. I found sex while high on pot was really tremendous.

I quite these activities (drinking and drugs, not sex) for my own reasons which are not important here.

So, even though I don't do these things and thus have to say "no" to your question, I do want to make some comments based on my years in the scene--during which time I've at least seen a lot.

When I am with my sub, I quite literally hold her life in my hands. She trusts me to take very good care of her, providing her with what we both enjoy for our ultimate pleasure. If I was not in full and absolute control of my faculties--and even one beer or high ball or glass of wine can diminish this, as I'm sure you learned while becoming an orthopod (what do you know about shoulders?)--and thus she should not trust me as much. Trust probably should drop in direct proportion to the amount I've had to drink.

But it's the same with the sub. I can't do what we love if I can't read her perfectly. I want to push her as far as she can go duringt this session, I want to introduce her to sensations she's not had before, I want her to experience delights she's hardly even dreamed of. I can't do that if I can't understand her body english, or her vocal reactions, or anything like that. If, for example, I'm using a cane while she's suspended, I have to be aware not only of how she is responding to the cane on various parts of her body, but I also have to know how she's taking the suspension. If she's not at the top of her game, I can't tell. (Could it be sub space or booze? Who's to tell? Should I continue or not?)

I have gone to parties where couples have had a glass of wine or a beer or something after they've played. No problem with that.

And, if you're like me and see all BDSM as simply creative foreplay that leads directly to wonderful sex, then perhaps sometime between putting the toys down and entering you, your Dom could offer you a drink!

Good topic. Thanks.

Bill

 

[Prof Bill]

Dominant's responsibilities

I posted the answer above immediately after reading the post that posed the question. Since then, I've read them all.

And I, too, have been struck by the number of Doms and subs who feel it's a good idea for the sub to "relax" with a drnik or toke or something.

Isn't it my responsibility to have the sub relax? That's the way I was taught by my delicious three "training subs." I was told it was my responsibility as the Dominant to make sure they trusted me, that they were relaxed and comfortable, and that they had a wonderful time. I was taught that if I accepted those responsibilities my rewards would be enormous--and, indeed, they have been.

Now, I'm not talking about a drink or two at dinner when play starts three or four hours later. It's basically out of your system by then.

But I have to tell you, the old leather guys I've met--and who also tauight me more than a little bit--would have a fit if someone was under any influence not provided by BDSM activities.

Inasmuch as this sounds like a bit of a rant, let me provide a hint.

I was taught that the session began long before toys were brought out. And my responsitilities for the instilling of trust, relaxation and comfort began when the session really begins. Some sessions begin when I first ask if she's free on such-and-such a night and would she like to scene--and other's don't begin until we're seeing each other for the first time that day. But in all cases, the scene begins well before her unpacking the toy bag.

Still a good topic.

Bill

 

[BlueSugar]

Drunken or even slightly tipsy sex is always interesting... and having a glass helps sometimes as well to get the mood flowing...but i've never been drunk (nor he) when we get intensly into playing.
He gets a little high often, I do occasionally... it makes him tired and less eager to play, I get disapointed, but its still wonderful sex.

 

[landcruisergal]

Sounds to me more like the subs are cheating THEMSELVES of the wonderful places that such intense physcial overload can take them, mentally & spiritually
It's my attitude that if you "need" intoxicants to do something, maybe it's something you should reconsider doing

Funny how I never considered taking drugs to cope with physical pain.Like my needleplay. Never wanted to corrupt the experience or endorphin flow.It was the mental that freaked me out. Now I know that its all so much better with purity.Certainly no uppers, my heart beats fast enough when he walks in the room. Any fatigue is forgotten in an instant.And a drunk or stoned dom wielding a weapon? My master has no vices except for this one, he is super straight, loves the control too much.

 

[cellis]

I have to say that we almost never have anything to drink when we play and we don't do drugs... that is our choice, not a judgement of those who do... personally, I don't even like to drink the day before we play... I don't want anything to dull the edge that is there... I want to feel and experience everything.

 

[KestralWolfe]

No drugs for me, personally, at all, and rarely do I drink in general.......NEVER during a scene. How horrible would I feel if something went slihtly wrong, and turned into majorly wrong because my senses were dulled? No, for me, it is simply not in the Safe, or Sane category to allow myself to indulge while either "playing" or disciplining.

 

[James G 5]

Oh there you go again, agreeing with me!!! Yes, I do agree I think they are missing something which makes me wonder why when most here profess to enjoy the entire experience totally. If I love something, I certainly am not looking for a way to diminish the experience in any way. Maybe it is my perfectionist tendencies which always influence me to be a purist of sorts as in natural is best so why add something to contaminate the mix. LOL.

Catalina

AGAIN?
This's gotta stop

 

[LustforPain]

The BDSM experience, or "subspace" as I've heard it called, is a drug for me. I've never seen any need to add to or alter it as it is very effective on it's own.

 

[catalina_francisco]

AGAIN?
This's gotta stop

Yep, people will start to talk and that just would not do!!

LOL

Catalina

 

[Wizard]

Where is the all above button at??????????


I mean not all the time either but I like to smoke a little weed now and then.....................We both find it enjoyable.......

As for drinking ............yep I don't find anything wrong with it........
I don't think it is like drinking and driving at all...............Your in your own home and if it is something you enjoy then do it...............Sex is all about pleasure...


Other drugs well ....................I have but don't anymore................Haven't in years but I have had fun..........



Another one I would have to admit to is shrooms............you get sooooo wound up on shrooms sex is great................But sex is great anything...


To each his or her own.............

I thought this thread topic was done in the past...

I still stick by what I said. To each his own.
I do , and I will.........

 

[hurtme]

hey now, i would like to take a moment to defend somethign here. Now, as far as a dom being under the influence, i prefer not...just because things can break...like the delicate bones in and around the neck for those of us that like breath play...and I have met doms who forget their own strength when they are under the influence. When I get high before a session it is not to dull the sensations. IN fact, I am a sensation junkie, and it seems to bring them out more. Every bite, every lash, every drip of candle wax... is more intense, more spiritual for me, I seem to feel it in my soul (if that makes any sense)...but I don't get stoned before playing very often...perhaps once out of every twenty sessions or so...so not all of us do it to "dull" the pain...I will admit though, when I am stoned and playing, i like things even mroe intense, which could potentially be dangerous, if one didn't trust ones dom completely...I never EVER am under the influence with strangers or in public though...I wouldn't feel comfortable doing so...

 

[DisGirlisNutz]

I have had sex, BD/sm play while doing extacy, stoned, buzzed drunk, and straight. (if I was drunk i would have the spins and that is not good when you are doing it.)

I have had a great time doing it every way... although while on X my limits can be pushed much higher. When smoking pot it is more relaxed play Well when buzzed on alcohol I just like to FUCK. and spank my ass while doing it. When straight well we have a great time and do it all. It doesn't matter to me whether straight drunk, Rolling (X) or stoned... we do it all and have fun doing it. However, most of the time we are straight. It is always nice to have a change once in a while.....

DGN

 

[catalina_francisco]

I think the main issue of this discussion is not so much if you are into drinking or substance abuse, but whether you realise the safety issues in relation to this particular lifestyle. There will always be those who think they are able to partake and be safe, the same as there are millions of drunk drivers on our roads who swear they are in as much control as when they are sober and to hell with the evidence and risks. Guess it comes down to assuming reasponsibility for yourself and others you involve in these decisions, and leaving the ego in the closet when trying to convince the world you are the one person on earth who is not susceptible to the normal decreased awareness, precision, and bad decisions so typical of being under the influence.

Catalina