Do any of you drink/do drugs while playing?

[graceanne]

you say that like its a bad thing

Depends on the person, I guess. But considering I got engaged shortly after my 18th birthday . . . well that would have left highschool for being slutty. lol

And I'm pretty sure he'd object if I started sleeping around now. Hence why I don't drink unless I'm with him. He's not gonna let anyone bug me.

He has been known to have me do a couple of shots when he wants to do something I'm not real thrilled about.

 

[cati]

Totally agree with you shy...

I start to get loose lipped. People think I'm a riot after a few. My honey thinks I'm way too much fun especially when I start talking sex...ours ...grinz.

 

[catalina_francisco]

Periodic bump...

 

[Ebonyfire]

as this is a very old thread just now bumped to my attention so I will drop in my .02 worth.

I do not drink/drug while playing. So much on my play involves working along the edge of damage / bad pain that I want to be able to speak/hear just before it go from very-good to very-bad.

I from the old "Safe-Sane-Consensual" school and any or all three can get messed up with drink/drugs....

Same here. The BDSM group I belonged to forbade drugs and alcohol at every play party. And if you were intoxicated you were shown to the door.

Since that time, I have read that there is good reason (other than the good sense reason) to forbid it. Evidently alcohol and drugs can affect how your body responds to pain and bruising. So think of it as a safety reason not to.

Eb

 

[FurryFury]

I've only seen on person drinking before a demo/play party with my local group. It seems she was nervous about being the first demo subject. I was surprised about all the drinking she was doing but it was allowed it seems. I didn't think it was supposed to be allowed but it was.

Fury

 

[catalina_francisco]

I've only seen on person drinking before a demo/play party with my local group. It seems she was nervous about being the first demo subject. I was surprised about all the drinking she was doing but it was allowed it seems. I didn't think it was supposed to be allowed but it was.

Fury

That would be enough reason for me to not go back there again or play with anyone from there.

Catalina

 

[FurryFury]

That would be enough reason for me to not go back there again or play with anyone from there.

Catalina

Well, I have yet to play with anyone from there but I will probably go back as it's the best local source of info I have found. I'm not giving it up until I find another better one.

Fury

 

[catalina_francisco]

Well, I have yet to play with anyone from there but I will probably go back as it's the best local source of info I have found. I'm not giving it up until I find another better one.

Fury

LOL, no problems, I am just a bit strict about some things. For me, after seeing that I would not be able to stop questioning the value of any information I received from those there.

Catalina

 

[FurryFury]

LOL, no problems, I am just a bit strict about some things. For me, after seeing that I would not be able to stop questioning the value of any information I received from those there.

Catalina

Well, like I said it's the closest I get to learning in real time, other than what little I do with my husband or online Dom. I am one who can disregard any info that seems wrong to me and utilize that which I can.

Fury

 

[Ebonyfire]

LOL, no problems, I am just a bit strict about some things. For me, after seeing that I would not be able to stop questioning the value of any information I received from those there.

Catalina

I think if there were rules about no drinking that were violated, I would say something about it. Some rules are there for a reason.

Eb

 

[catalina_francisco]

I think if there were rules about no drinking that were violated, I would say something about it. Some rules are there for a reason.

Eb

LOL, I would question why there was no such rule.

Catalina

 

[Ebonyfire]

LOL, I would question why there was no such rule.

Catalina

I think there may be many people who do not know it is not a good idea to drink or do drugs in that atmosphere.

Eb

 

[FurryFury]

Come to think of it, I've never seen a list of "the rules." I had just never seen anyone drink like this girl. I mean she was like, "how long till we leave the restaurant do I have time for one more?" The hostess was like we have stuff at the location too, don't worry. This all really surprised me.

The main rule I have seen in e-mails is about personal privacy and all. Good rules about that are stated in every notice about a munch, play party or demo.

I think this poor girl had "stage fright." I've been there myself just not in a BDSM setting. I've had to learn to get past it without drinking.

I agree about it being likely that a lot of folks don't know how dangerous it could be.

Fury

 

[catalina_francisco]

Well, like I said it's the closest I get to learning in real time, other than what little I do with my husband or online Dom. I am one who can disregard any info that seems wrong to me and utilize that which I can.

Fury

I can too, but for me some things seem to indicate the underlying character and/or standards of others (in this case the club and its members as to continue to go they are basically condoning it) and where this lifestyle is concerned as far as my own close face to face association, I am not so willing to compromise and hope all is OK, I prefer to make other choices which feel safer and more in tune with my values.

See, I can understand someone being nervous, but there are so many ways to deal with that besides substance abuse, and if those ways do not work, I would suggest the nervous person wait until they feel more secure and ready. Perhaps her need to drink was based on a general feeling of unsafeness, perhaps it was based on previous things she had witnessed at the club, perhaps she was just not ready...whichever, for me drinking is not the answer or an option.

Catalina

 

[A Desert Rose]

I get stoned before every session. I'm more fun that way.









(just kidding, okay? It was a joke... don't everyone come flame me. Remember, I'm a nurse... I know 'bout some stuff.)

 

[FurryFury]

That's my thinking too Cat, she just wasn't ready. I've never seen her before and I suspect she was being pushed either from within herself or by her Dom who wasn't presenting btw. I didn't understand at all but from what I could tell everything went well for her.

Fury

 

[catalina_francisco]

That's my thinking too Cat, she just wasn't ready. I've never seen her before and I suspect she was being pushed either from within herself or by her Dom who wasn't presenting btw. I didn't understand at all but from what I could tell everything went well for her.

Fury

Do you come to that conclusion from the way she appeared after the session and while still under the influence of all she had drunk? Or perhaps because you have seen her since and she is still alive and hasn't confessed anything to you?

Catalina

 

[FurryFury]

Do you come to that conclusion from the way she appeared after the session and while still under the influence of all she had drunk? Or perhaps because you have seen her since and she is still alive and hasn't confessed anything to you?

Catalina

Her part was first. It was nearly six hours later when I left. No, I can't be sure nor have I seen her since but what she demo-ed should have been mild for her anyway. It's just my impression that she was fine, happy and sober by the time I left. I am not a professional in this area.

Fury

 

[catalina_francisco]

Her part was first. It was nearly six hours later when I left. No, I can't be sure nor have I seen her since but what she demo-ed should have been mild for her anyway. It's just my impression that she was fine, happy and sober by the time I left. I am not a professional in this area.

Fury

True, and I guess what I am doing in part is trying to help you in your quest for knowledge and experience to not always look at just the surface, or what is easiest to deal with at the time, and also be responsible and not become prone to doing what others feel is right just because you might feel awkward about saying anything otherwise. As you already know, people have different triggers in life and what may seem simple and straightforward to most may be traumatic to another. Given she was nervous enough to feel the need for drink to get there, it is possible what was expected of her could trigger things in her. Those reactions do not always happen in the moment. For example, there are things we have done which I seemed to handle OK as far as he was concerned, and even myself, and which hours/days later saw me crumbling in a heap and in need of a lot of work for weeks/months afterward...and they were not all terribly difficult things by most people's standards, just difficult for me because of who I am and triggers.

Catalina

 

[saw_man1]

Me? No!

I am rather uncontrollable when I am sober. Me loaded is a scary thought. A drink or two is no big deal but certainly no more than that for me. Quite frankly I don’t like being drunk at all. The thought of losing control does not appeal to me in the least.

 

[FurryFury]

True, and I guess what I am doing in part is trying to help you in your quest for knowledge and experience to not always look at just the surface, or what is easiest to deal with at the time, and also be responsible and not become prone to doing what others feel is right just because you might feel awkward about saying anything otherwise. As you already know, people have different triggers in life and what may seem simple and straightforward to most may be traumatic to another. Given she was nervous enough to feel the need for drink to get there, it is possible what was expected of her could trigger things in her. Those reactions do not always happen in the moment. For example, there are things we have done which I seemed to handle OK as far as he was concerned, and even myself, and which hours/days later saw me crumbling in a heap and in need of a lot of work for weeks/months afterward...and they were not all terribly difficult things by most people's standards, just difficult for me because of who I am and triggers.

Catalina

I understand Cat. Hopefully her Master will help her should anything like that occur. Otherwise I hope she has a good support system of her own.

I'm not really the go along with the crowd type. I'm well honed in being an individual. People usually go along with me, if I want them to, not the other way around. No one can make me do anything I don't want to. The only person I truly fear is myself. No one has power over me I don't give them. So the person most in the position to truly hurt me, is me.

Fury

 

[catalina_francisco]

I understand Cat. Hopefully her Master will help her should anything like that occur. Otherwise I hope she has a good support system of her own.

I'm not really the go along with the crowd type. I'm well honed in being an individual. People usually go along with me, if I want them to, not the other way around. No one can make me do anything I don't want to. The only person I truly fear is myself. No one has power over me I don't give them. So the person most in the position to truly hurt me, is me.

Fury

True, but sometimes it is not about you or hurting you as much as standing by while someone else may be hurt. While you cannot be responsible for everyone, you can be responsible for accepting something which you did that night by staying and going back again. I understand wanting to learn, but at what cost and what are you learning and from what type of people? If we had been at the dinner/meeting you were, I have no doubt F would have had something to say to those in charge and also would not have been there afterward or ever again. He will not even spank me if I have taken a Panadol earlier in the day...standing by and participating (by watching and continuing membership) while someone in that woman's state was used in a demo would not have been something which was acceptable. Too many peoiple stand by these days in many situations saying they just didn't want to get involved...but being there, or walking away without a word means you are involved.

Catalina

 

[FurryFury]

True, but sometimes it is not about you or hurting you as much as standing by while someone else may be hurt. While you cannot be responsible for everyone, you can be responsible for accepting something which you did that night by staying and going back again. I understand wanting to learn, but at what cost and what are you learning and from what type of people? If we had been at the dinner/meeting you were, I have no doubt F would have had something to say to those in charge and also would not have been there afterward or ever again. He will not even spank me if I have taken a Panadol earlier in the day...standing by and participating (by watching and continuing membership) while someone in that woman's state was used in a demo would not have been something which was acceptable. Too many peoiple stand by these days in many situations saying they just didn't want to get involved...but being there, or walking away without a word means you are involved.

Catalina

Well, that's something to consider, though that night my opinion was that it was not my business what she, her Master, the demo guy and all wanted to do. I see people drink all the time in all sorts of situations. This was the first time here though, but anyway, food for thought.

Fury

 

[FurryFury]

Oh I just remembered that I have had some wine and some scenes before. I love to set up a picnic with wine, bread, fruit, cheese and perhaps, sweets for romantic/kinky get aways.

Fury

 

[FurryFury]

In New Orleans I had a really great glass of red wine with dinner at Arnauds. That was enough with my sinus meds to make me fly.

Then we got the Cafe' Brulot and I had three or four cups of that too, which thank heavens, also had caffeine in it.

I think he had a sazerac and probably the same number of cups of Brulot.

We did scene that night. I'm not sorry either. I trust us both to be careful and handle whatever comes up. It was a great scene for me and for him. I'm very happy about it.

It's funny though I never thought of it as scening while on drugs or booze. I felt perfectly in control of myself despite what I drank and he seemed the same.

He drinks most off nights. If I were waiting until he hadn't had anything to drink we would likely never have a scene.

That is not acceptable.

Fury