Do you believe in ''Cliques'' here in the Lounge or Srp forum?

[Alana_]

My last post to this thread then:
"I am so sorry it was hijacked into this, Alana."

I hope you post again here. Your opinion is very welcome lilly. X

 

[Alana_]

You certainly are an attention-to-detail woman.

Im choosing to take that as a compliment. Thank you.

 

[yeishia]

So he thinks I'm you? This thread is a trip!

I didn't mean to offend anyone, actually I don't think his accusations were called for, and I certainly didn't know I wasn't allowed to repost something that was sent to me.

My apologies for the disturbance everyone. Have a good day!

I just received a PM from Light Ice insisting that you are my alt which we both know you are not.

I have no way of proving or disproving this, yet he is threatening me with repercussions should you post again. He has insisted I not post again as you!

This is very distressful for me as I have no knowledge of you, we have never even interacted on Lit.

This whole thing has come as a big surprise to me given that until now I have never had a problem with this man, in fact I had considered him to be a friend.

I am at a total loss as to what to do in this situation?

I hate drama and am finding this very distasteful, the fact he is accusing me is stressful enough but the fact I am powerless to do anything about it leaves me feeling impotent.

I am not asking you to leave the board I would never do that, I myself have refused to be pushed off it preferring instead to mostly stay in the areas I have carved out for myself.

I simply am at a total loss...

I would appreciate any help you could give me in settling this matter.

Thank you so very much.

 

[Ahren]

Well, there is a way to disprove it. Have a moderator check both your IP addresses and confirm they're different. Granted this isn't definitive proof, but I'm not sure you know how to set up a proxy. No offense meant since that's not really common knowledge.

 

[yeishia]

Thank you Ahren for your advice.

When I reported that my personal information had been exchanged, I asked if they could help me prove that Smiley was not my alt.

Yes, you gathered rightly I know very little about computers*giggles*when I first started playing WOW I had to to be on follow because I couldn't manage it mouse and keyboard together LOL.

 

[Maid of Marvels]

Moderators cannot see IP or ISP. Never have been able to. Furthermore, why should someone have to prove who they are to anyone?

This might have been a valid topic when it began, though I think the OP would have liked to suspend disbelief when it comes to the existence of cliques online. They exist, and always have. Same thing goes for bullies; despite the fact that females are sneaky bullies while the guys tend to be more in their victim's faces.

No matter what we like to think, Lit is a porn site and the vast majority of the people here think of little beyond sex. Picture the zombies in "Thriller" and give them all Lit membernames.

Why can't you all just be happy in your own skins and stop the nonsense of putting people down in order to boost your own egos? It really doesn't impress folks (except for the ones in your cliques ). I know, I know - it's because this is the internet where you can be everything you aren't offline and make the people here online suffer the same treatments you are currently getting. (Not aimed at anyone in particular, but there are some really good articles out there that might explain some of this childish and meanhearted behavior.)

So, I promise to behave for anyone who wants to pay my rent and bills. Who's in?

 

[SoulWeaver]

So, I promise to behave for anyone who wants to pay my rent and bills. Who's in?

Low rent and minimal bills? Sounds like a hoot, I'm in . . .

ps love your use of italics, I find my mouse strangely drawn to their use again, must . . . resist . . . must

 

[Alana_]

Maid, thank you for trying to get this back on topic. Great post, and very sensibly put. Thank you.

 

[yeishia]

Moderators cannot see IP or ISP. Never have been able to. Furthermore, why should someone have to prove who they are to anyone?

This might have been a valid topic when it began, though I think the OP would have liked to suspend disbelief when it comes to the existence of cliques online. They exist, and always have. Same thing goes for bullies; despite the fact that females are sneaky bullies while the guys tend to be more in their victim's faces.

No matter what we like to think, Lit is a porn site and the vast majority of the people here think of little beyond sex. Picture the zombies in "Thriller" and give them all Lit membernames.

Why can't you all just be happy in your own skins and stop the nonsense of putting people down in order to boost your own egos? It really doesn't impress folks (except for the ones in your cliques ). I know, I know - it's because this is the internet where you can be everything you aren't offline and make the people here online suffer the same treatments you are currently getting. (Not aimed at anyone in particular, but there are some really good articles out there that might explain some of this childish and meanhearted behavior.)

So, I promise to behave for anyone who wants to pay my rent and bills. Who's in?

Thank you my good friend, I could not have said it better myself *hands you a bouquet of roses*

Oh and by the way, no money for me… Turkey leftovers??

 

[Ahren]

Moderators cannot see IP or ISP. Never have been able to. Furthermore, why should someone have to prove who they are to anyone?

How do you know this? Are you a moderator here? I have the ability on the forums I'm a moderator, but whatever. An admin then. Someone must have the ability to see them or else how would you ban an IP when the situation arises? Banning just a username isn't too effective sometimes.

 

[yeishia]

I hope you are correct Ahren I really am it will help me immensely.

*hugs Maid*

As maid wrote the issue isn't really the alt., there is no rule against one.

It is more that I do not want to put up with the bull shit that will arise the next time she posts, which is her right.

I come to Lit to do my own thing and relax. I know firsthand how difficult the cliques can make this...

 

[monique_minx]

Alana, sweetie, I don't think you're cliquish at all. You have your own tastes to be sure, you start wild threads in the lounge which often turn out awesome (this one notwithstanding) *Glares at certain people* And you float everywhere, even just dropping into people's threads to say 'hello' at random (my Boudoir, for example).

I remember hardly knowing you but for reading one of your brilliant SRP's and you just came to say hello to me, we got to talking and I found you a lot nicer than I thought you'd be (no offense intended, I was a noob and only severely intimidated by all the writers I considered to be good/great/definitely better than me. Lol!)

And that's all I wanted to say on that front.
Also, you should have blown this thread up three pages back would have saved a lot of trouble.

And Maid, you're totally spot on. It doesn't matter who has what alt, as LI has so eloquently put it on many an occasion; this is the fucking internet - who gives a rat's arse?!

Besides, girlsmiley is on a writing site overusing capitalized LOL's - nuff said. I'd be ashamed (no offense girl, I'm sure you're a lovely person but seriously...)

I'm off to the dreaded doctor's again, this time it's my sister's OTHER foot >.<

 

[ObscureInsanity]

Better Late than never: response

Just tossing this out there.

It's a term I find oddly offensive, because in my experience I find cliques imply bullies, and that's come from my own personal experience on my first ever site, and in latter years on Lit itself in the general board. That's my take, and only my take.

I know there are 'groups' here in the lounge/srp areas that tend to hang out together, but to call them cliques I think is a bit unfair, as most here are welcoming and will interact with who ever comes by. Cliques in my mind don't do that..they isolate themselves and leave others intentionally out .
I was always weary of Lit. I'll admit that. I don't like that there is an undercurrent of nutty hostility including the Lounge sometimes, and in some areas of the site shocking bigotry ( not seen/noticed here in the Lounge by me). But once I found my niche here in srp, avoided the general board, and got comfortable, after one false start as Alana some years ao, then under a different name a year later, before I returned over a year ago if not more as Alana, I've found this time I seem to have cracked it enough for me to continue coming most days and am very happy.
I dont see myself as being part of a 'group' or definitely not a clique, despite something recently said to me. I guess one persons interpretation differs from anothers.
But...do you think there are cliques, or just groups that tend to gather together....or what is your own personal take on the habits of the Forum in the srp area and lounge. Do you find it hard to feel you're welcome/wanted here?

Please Please don't let this become a cause for arguments, and finger pointing. I'm just asking or trying to ask what your feelings on the issue are. Keep it friendly please, and on topic.

As a popular Bowling for Soup song says "High School Never Ends". Sad fact, it’s sort of basic human instinct to stick with those you know/feel most connected to/look like you/act like you/ect. sometimes people branch out if they're new and unable to have that prejudice but... it brings it right back to 'who's cool=best to speak to' versus 'the person with the least comments back=lame to speak to'. It’s a vicious cycle, unfortunately.

 

[girlsmiley]

that guy's an idiot

I just received a PM from Light Ice insisting that you are my alt which we both know you are not.

I have no way of proving or disproving this, yet he is threatening me with repercussions should you post again. He has insisted I not post again as you!

This is very distressful for me as I have no knowledge of you, we have never even interacted on Lit.

This whole thing has come as a big surprise to me given that until now I have never had a problem with this man, in fact I had considered him to be a friend.

I am at a total loss as to what to do in this situation?

I hate drama and am finding this very distasteful, the fact he is accusing me is stressful enough but the fact I am powerless to do anything about it leaves me feeling impotent.

I am not asking you to leave the board I would never do that, I myself have refused to be pushed off it preferring instead to mostly stay in the areas I have carved out for myself.

I simply am at a total loss...

I would appreciate any help you could give me in settling this matter.

Thank you so very much.

I will contiinue to post as normal. Haha, he sounds like a bully. Advice? Hmm. I would send him a PM requesting that he stop and tell him you are adding him to your ignore list. Then post on that clique thread that bullies do not scare you. You will stand up to bullies. How much of a bully can he be while cowered under his PM's that you will no longer receive! You eat bullies for breakfast! LOL

And from there ignore him.

I'm not sure how to make a complaint or who to talk to about harrassment on here. I'm sure if you asked around someone would be able to help you. I didn't even realise you weren't allowed to post PM's LOL

I can't believe anyone's friends with this man. I knew he was an asshole straight off the bat.

Chin up girlfriend, lit's about having fun. And I intend to

The people are so much friendlier at the Isle of lesbos *hint*

 

[yeishia]

Thank you can I quote you?

Isle of lesbos? *blushes* ( I did the blush cos it is hated lol )

I am off to play WoW they are more friendly there too

 

[girlsmiley]

Low rent and minimal bills? Sounds like a hoot, I'm in . . .

ps love your use of italics, I find my mouse strangely drawn to their use again, must . . . resist . . . must

Me too!

 

[girlsmiley]

(no offense intended, I was a noob and only severely intimidated by all the writers I considered to be good/great/definitely better than me. Lol!)


Besides, girlsmiley is on a writing site overusing capitalized LOL's - nuff said. I'd be ashamed (no offense girl, I'm sure you're a lovely person but seriously...)

...

Is that all you've got? LOL

Peace dude

 

[Light Ice]

I don't understand the drama here. I attempted to express myself directly in PMs to keep this from the boards. That was, clearly, pointless.

It boils down to this;

I think Yeishia is using an Alt to express herself here, in particular, in conversations with me and a few others.

She doesn't matter enough to me for me to take the time to Sherlock it out. I think it's stupid and I'm not going to deal with it. No moderators, I don't care enough to make it an issue (and i don't even know if they would give a shit. I can't imagine they would.).

Is there a chance I'm wrong?

Absolutely.

Do I give a shit?

No.

I'm not even certain why I bothered posting this. I'm perfectly content to be a "bully" or "asshole" and just not speak to either. Or call them whackjobs because I spotted blatant insanity. Or whatever.

This isn't new to any of you. Nobody gives a shit. If someone wants to cry about it, I'll probably laugh at them.

 

[APassionateFlame]

I've been skimming along through the posts here for a few days and I think I finally feel drawn enough to have two cents of my own to input. So, with the promise of no personal insults and no intention to start an argument (nor any desire to take part in one, for that matter) - here goes.

I haven't really been around Lit all that long. In fact, compared to some of the folks around here you could say that I'm a relatively new personality (a really new one compared to most of you, I'd imagine!) I've quietly (for the most part) watched a few threads and peeped in here or there to have a look-see at what's going on.

But I remain an outsider looking in. Like a peeper, I'm just staring in through the window at all the fun happening inside the house.

That's not to say that I've been snubbed from any great cliques or refused from any great circles. However, there is a sense of being an outsider. I imagine that is something that new folks feel now and again around here. I don't necessarily think that anybody is doing it on purpose (and the folks that ARE doing it on purpose are just rude) - I merely believe that it is human nature for 'groups' of friends to form. And once those groups are formed, it becomes easy to get comfortable with the folks that are already part of the group, and I imagine it becomes harder to accept newer folks because you've become comfortable with the folks already in your groups. Each group already has inside jokes and comments and kinks and all sorts of fun things that you each share - and adding another person or two in can sort of throw a wrench into the cogs.

I don't much fancy the word clique, but I think it nicely does the job here. There are cliques all over the place that are not just made up of mean-spirited individuals aiming to keep others out of their little club. I think it's somewhat misleading to say that all cliques are started and run by individuals that can be considered bullies. I'm willing to bet many of us have/had groups of friends that we were/are very close to. A small group or a large group - you all share likes and interests (perhaps even here on Lit) and are a pretty close bunch. An outsider might call that a clique because they are not on the inside - because they feel like they're being kept on the outside (perhaps intentionally, perhaps because they don't share the same interests, or perhaps just because that's how they classify 'groups' of folks that they're not a part of.)

My being an 'outsider' here on Lit isn't really anybody's fault but my own. I haven't really taken the time to reach out to many folks (partially because I'm a little intimidated, partially because I've never really written 'erotica' before, and partially because well, I like to be liked and I don't really want to step on the wrong toes, as it were) and I can't really expect perfect strangers to just approach me with the intention of chatting and perhaps talking. I know that I'm a really good writer (despite my lack of erotica/sexual role play experience - I have plenty of writing experience that I'm quite proud of - not to toot my own horn) and I know that once I get into the swing of things I'll likely have a blast writing with a handful of you folks for sure. But as of right now it's only my own fault that I'm the peeping Flame peering through the glass at all you lovely folks.

I certainly don't individually blame anybody here (or any groups for that matter) for MY not being part of any special little 'group' of folks.

However, I can see from the point of view of somebody that isn't already part of one of these potentially existing 'groups.' I can see that there might be some people that may feel like they're being kept out of the group or the loop or the 'clique' for whatever reason. I can see how some people might feel that way - because it is in our human nature to want to be liked and when we're not part of the group all the other cool kids are part of - we suddenly feel like we're less liked and that might sting a little. And so we start labeling people - because that's something else we're really comfortable with. If you're not part of a group of people and you don't seem to share the same interests - it's easier to call them a 'clique' and chalk it up to them just not liking you, than to accept that maybe you just don't have as much in common with them as you originally thought that you did.

I've noticed that a common grouping of people here on Lit seems to involve what sorts of kinks you share. So somebody that's only into a small handful of kinks isn't really going to mesh well with folks that are into a whole lot of kinks. Or if you don't share particular kinks, it's going to be harder to write together. And there are some folks who will see that more as an insult (IE: 'I don't want to write with you' opposed to 'I don't think writing together is going to work out because I want to write about this (insert kink) and you're just not into writing about it or reading about it.') I guess what I'm trying to say there is that some people view things way too emotionally and get irrational and it's easier to retaliate with insults and words like 'clique' and 'club' and such.

....I certainly hope that my extremely lengthy (and possibly winded) post here made even the tiniest bit of sense and has some clarity to it.

 

[ObscureInsanity]

I've been skimming along through the posts here for a few days and I think I finally feel drawn enough to have two cents of my own to input. So, with the promise of no personal insults and no intention to start an argument (nor any desire to take part in one, for that matter) - here goes.

I haven't really been around Lit all that long. In fact, compared to some of the folks around here you could say that I'm a relatively new personality (a really new one compared to most of you, I'd imagine!) I've quietly (for the most part) watched a few threads and peeped in here or there to have a look-see at what's going on.

But I remain an outsider looking in. Like a peeper, I'm just staring in through the window at all the fun happening inside the house.

That's not to say that I've been snubbed from any great cliques or refused from any great circles. However, there is a sense of being an outsider. I imagine that is something that new folks feel now and again around here. I don't necessarily think that anybody is doing it on purpose (and the folks that ARE doing it on purpose are just rude) - I merely believe that it is human nature for 'groups' of friends to form. And once those groups are formed, it becomes easy to get comfortable with the folks that are already part of the group, and I imagine it becomes harder to accept newer folks because you've become comfortable with the folks already in your groups. Each group already has inside jokes and comments and kinks and all sorts of fun things that you each share - and adding another person or two in can sort of throw a wrench into the cogs.

I don't much fancy the word clique, but I think it nicely does the job here. There are cliques all over the place that are not just made up of mean-spirited individuals aiming to keep others out of their little club. I think it's somewhat misleading to say that all cliques are started and run by individuals that can be considered bullies. I'm willing to bet many of us have/had groups of friends that we were/are very close to. A small group or a large group - you all share likes and interests (perhaps even here on Lit) and are a pretty close bunch. An outsider might call that a clique because they are not on the inside - because they feel like they're being kept on the outside (perhaps intentionally, perhaps because they don't share the same interests, or perhaps just because that's how they classify 'groups' of folks that they're not a part of.)

My being an 'outsider' here on Lit isn't really anybody's fault but my own. I haven't really taken the time to reach out to many folks (partially because I'm a little intimidated, partially because I've never really written 'erotica' before, and partially because well, I like to be liked and I don't really want to step on the wrong toes, as it were) and I can't really expect perfect strangers to just approach me with the intention of chatting and perhaps talking. I know that I'm a really good writer (despite my lack of erotica/sexual role play experience - I have plenty of writing experience that I'm quite proud of - not to toot my own horn) and I know that once I get into the swing of things I'll likely have a blast writing with a handful of you folks for sure. But as of right now it's only my own fault that I'm the peeping Flame peering through the glass at all you lovely folks.

I certainly don't individually blame anybody here (or any groups for that matter) for MY not being part of any special little 'group' of folks.

However, I can see from the point of view of somebody that isn't already part of one of these potentially existing 'groups.' I can see that there might be some people that may feel like they're being kept out of the group or the loop or the 'clique' for whatever reason. I can see how some people might feel that way - because it is in our human nature to want to be liked and when we're not part of the group all the other cool kids are part of - we suddenly feel like we're less liked and that might sting a little. And so we start labeling people - because that's something else we're really comfortable with. If you're not part of a group of people and you don't seem to share the same interests - it's easier to call them a 'clique' and chalk it up to them just not liking you, than to accept that maybe you just don't have as much in common with them as you originally thought that you did.

I've noticed that a common grouping of people here on Lit seems to involve what sorts of kinks you share. So somebody that's only into a small handful of kinks isn't really going to mesh well with folks that are into a whole lot of kinks. Or if you don't share particular kinks, it's going to be harder to write together. And there are some folks who will see that more as an insult (IE: 'I don't want to write with you' opposed to 'I don't think writing together is going to work out because I want to write about this (insert kink) and you're just not into writing about it or reading about it.') I guess what I'm trying to say there is that some people view things way too emotionally and get irrational and it's easier to retaliate with insults and words like 'clique' and 'club' and such.

....I certainly hope that my extremely lengthy (and possibly winded) post here made even the tiniest bit of sense and has some clarity to it.

Two Words: Well Said.

 

[girlsmiley]

I don't understand the drama here. I attempted to express myself directly in PMs to keep this from the boards. That was, clearly, pointless.

It boils down to this;

I think Yeishia is using an Alt to express herself here, in particular, in conversations with me and a few others.

She doesn't matter enough to me for me to take the time to Sherlock it out. I think it's stupid and I'm not going to deal with it. No moderators, I don't care enough to make it an issue (and i don't even know if they would give a shit. I can't imagine they would.).

Is there a chance I'm wrong?

Absolutely.

Do I give a shit?

No.

I'm not even certain why I bothered posting this. I'm perfectly content to be a "bully" or "asshole" and just not speak to either. Or call them whackjobs because I spotted blatant insanity. Or whatever.

This isn't new to any of you. Nobody gives a shit. If someone wants to cry about it, I'll probably laugh at them.

So you're laughing after causing all this? You can only have two motives, and I would interfere with either. Either you are expecting to find peace by sucking the confidence of others, or think you have a greater advantage by posting this defensive babble.


Damn straight you were wrong to make false accusations.


Like I said to you before, It's hard to forgive the follies and vices of others and their offenses, and your good opinion once lost, is lost forever. Your good opinion is lost, if ever posessed.


I recall the comment you made about bullies, how you thought they were neither cruel or weak minded, I can see why coming from the mind of the weak. It's time for you to reflect.


Yeishia, he "doesn't give a shit" This is his character, however rotten to the core.


Well I'm off everyone, It's a beautiful day here in Sydney and I intend to enjoy it.

 

[Ausus_girl13]

Do I believe in cliques?
If this means do I like them, then the answer is no, I do not.

Is there a clique here in the lounge?
Undoubtedly yes, and most of the members have already posted on this thread.

This is not meant to be inflammatory, just my opinion.

Alright so here's the deal. And CK although I am holding your post up as evidence, I am not particularly annoyed with you. But I am annoyed with the version of thought you represent.

To all the newbies peeing their pants cause they think the lounge is hard to break into. Guess what?! It is. So grow a pair and start fucking talking.

At one point all of us were new here, and yes, we all had to do our time, and put forth the effort to make a name and a place for ourselves, even the most prolific. This hit and run teasing shit, is annoying as hell, and if you want us to like you or see what sort of chops you got, cause believe me, in this lounge we are all looking for potential playmates, friends and most of all-- POTENTIAL CO-WRITERS! If you don't show us what you got then we won't know what you are capable of.

My first months here I was totally ignored, completely. Did I cry about it? No. Did I accuse the others of being in a clique and bitch when no one held my hand? Nope. I just kept posting. Till I woke up one morning and realized that I was where I wanted to be.

You want vapid run of the mill games- go to the playground.

You want to write, explore, see what it's like to write a thread about tentacle demon sex, stay here find a co-writer and do it. But please, stop bitching.

Alana sorry, this was just getting old.

Oh and this "girlsmiley/yeishia" thing is funny as hell.

 

[Hikari]

Damn it...I came to the lounge hoping to find some maturity. If I want childish squabbling I'll go to the deviant art forums. Please try to maintain some dignity people.

 

[SoulWeaver]

Damn it...I came to the lounge hoping to find some maturity. If I want childish squabbling I'll go to the deviant art forums. Please try to maintain some dignity people.

A calming voice. Perhaps drinks and nibbles would help?

 

[Hikari]

A calming voice. Perhaps drinks and nibbles would help?

That always helps...