Female Asses and Legs for Lesbians and Bisexual Women - #LIII

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Many women are afraid of their first mammogram, but there is no need to worry.
By taking a few minutes each day for the week preceding the exam, and doing
the following exercises, you will be totally prepared for the test. And, best
of all, you can do these simple practice exercises right in your own home:

Exercise #1: Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist.
Invite a stranger into the room. Press the bookends against one of your
breasts. Smash the bookends together as hard as you can. Set an appointment
with the stranger to meet next year and do it again.

Exercise #2: Locate a large bench-type vise. While standing in the most
uncomfortable up-right position you can manage, insert your most sensitive
breast between the squeeze plates. Hold your breath. Tighten down the handle
on the vise until you are about to cry. Make three more turns on the handle,
for good measure.

Exercise #3: Open your refrigerator door and insert one breast between the
door and the main box. Have one of your strongest friends slam the door shut
as hard as possible and lean on the door for good measure. Hold that position
for five seconds. Repeat again in case the first time wasn't effective
enough.

Exercise #4: Visit your garage at three in the morning when the temperature
of the floor is just perfect. Take off all your warm clothes and lay
comfortably on the floor with one breast wedged under the rear tire of your
family car. Ask a friend to slowly back the car up until your breast is
sufficiently flattened and chilled. Turn over and repeat for the other side.

Congratulations, now you will be properly prepared for your next mammogram.
(Geez, and men think they have it bad.....prostate.....HA )

 

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Hmm, "...and men think they have it bad"?



okay, a few for guys

 

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