Gunfights!

[TheDR4KE]

Hoist the Dead Man High

Gather close, and be real still.
Let me tell'ya 'bout my fight
with Cordelia Bill,
back in twenty oh three
on Literotica Hill.

There we was, boots, dust, hats, guns
the folk all watchin' with glee --
't'was them, they'd have the runs!
But the older folk know,
someone loves daughters and sons.

It was Ted that caused it all
dirty cheatin' rowdy Ted
drop'd an Ace, caused a brawl
made it look I was bad,
and now I'm takin' the fall.

A tumbleweed blows on by
(listen close now) BANG. bang.
a door slams shut nearby.
Someone's sayin' out loud:
"It was really all a lie."

But when your honours at stake
no-one listens or stops,
even for a mistake.
But we did, and that's why
you're here at Rowdy Ted's wake.

 

[JUDO]

Time! Lay your arms down. The fight is finished. Did Cordelia ever show? It looks like Drake did a spankin' fine job, but the judges will rule -- tomorrow night.

Judges -- post your opinions here by 9pm tomorrow.

Thank you.


- Deputy Judo

 

[TheDR4KE]

That was fun.

I'm glad Eve's was just a stray bullet, because I'd have no chance against that. Or her poem.

Quack

the D

 

[JUDO]

Wicked -

You're such a good, bad girl.

 

[TheDR4KE]

and thanks Judo, for your fine adjudicatin'


Quack

the D

 

[MyOpinion]

removed

 

[JUDO]

Thanks to everyone for a fine first outting. I have two more challenges ready, if anybody is willing.

Night ya'll -


- Judo

 

[Cordelia]

ACK!!

I can't even begin to apologize for my absence. Sorry!!

The truth is that I received a phone call from a large bank wondering if I was interested in a position they had open. They offered an obscene amount of money, so I sat here furiously updating my resume. While typing away, I looked up to see the clock at 9:40 PM.

I am so sorry. And here I was so ready...

I even grew up in Western Montana and I am living in Nevada!

Grrrrr.... I am very angry with myself.

Great poem, DR4KE...

And Eve....I was born yeller.

Miserably,



Cordelia


(P.S. Wish me luck on the job interview...)

 

[MyOpinion]

removed

 

[TheDR4KE]

All the very best on your application Cordelia!

That sort of stuff naturally comes first.

Quack

the D

 

[JUDO]

...and we will all naturally take our cut.

 

[karmadog]

Well, Cordelia, I know what position I'm thinking of...

 

[WickedEve]

Too late Cordelia. The wanted poster is up and you're wanted dead or alive. Turn yourself in peacefully or we'll round up a poet posse.

 

[Lauren Hynde]

Good luck with everything, Cord.

I guess this means the D won the first battle of titans, uh? Or will there be a rematch?

This judging business is easier than I thought...

 

[Angeline]

That was it????

So we can change outta these AVs now right? I gotta tell ya, Philly ain't much of a cowtown, what with them newfangled pavements and such.

 

[Lauren Hynde]

I'm not going to change. This gun is sort of sexy, I guess I'll hold on to it for a while...

Be careful

 

[Elda Furry]

I like Cordelia's minimalist approach to her poem but I have to go with Drake. He was quickest on the draw. His poem was posted first... what?... hold on. Oh! Now I see. Drake was shootin' at himself. Anyway, Drake is the only winner in my book.

Fun poem, Drake. And I'm sure Angeline loves you for the part about "Rowdy Ted's wake."

 

[Angeline]

The big battle....

Elda Furry said:

Oh! Now I see. Drake was shootin' at himself


Well thank heavens then that he was shootin blanks.

And I'm sure Angeline loves you for the part about "Rowdy Ted's" wake

Almost as much as I love you for pointing it out....

 

[JUDO]

Re: That was it????

So we can change outta these AVs now right? I gotta tell ya, Philly ain't much of a cowtown, what with them newfangled pavements and such.

I kinda like the lasso. Hmmm... Maybe I can find another one. Anyone know where I might search for a new lasso?

 

[Elda Furry]

Why don't you be wonder woman!

 

[JUDO]

Why don't you be wonder woman!

I tried that once before, Elda, but the first time I used it, I forgot where I parked the plane. Hmmm...

 

[Elda Furry]

I tried that once before, Elda, but the first time I used it, I forgot where I parked the plane. Hmmm...

Yeah, and with it being invisible that's a real bitch.

 

[TheDR4KE]

Yee Hawwwww

Well, rough as guts whiskey shots all 'round then to celebrate the victory.

Solo gunfight. Is that a new euphemism for masturbation? Lucky I had all them there women watching. That way I can call it a 'show'.

And blanks indeed ... didn't you cowgals notice yet that I shot your bra straps right through?


Quack

the D

 

[JUDO]

And blanks indeed ... didn't you cowgals notice yet that I shot your bra straps right through?

Good thing I changed then -- no straps needed. Talk about your wonder bras...

 

[Angeline]

Ooooooh JUDO

did you get your superhero outfit at Superhero Girl AVs R Us, like me? (The Poetry Girl costume was half off; apparently few find the ability to leap over mediocre language in a single bound compelling.)