How to make people laugh

[rhev]

Two goldfish are in a tank. The first goldfish turns to the second one and says, "You man the guns, I'll drive."

 

[MagicFingers]

The definitive answer

Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
















Neither














It's obvious, the ROOSTER came first.

 

[EdEc]

One day a man walked into a bar with his dog. He walked up to the counter and the bartender said”We don’t allow dogs in this bar.”

The man replied”But sir,my dog is a smart dog it can talk!”The bartender didn’t look impressed but gave him a shot anyway.The man then asked his dog”What grows on a tree?”

The dog replied”Bark, Bark”

The man again asked his dog and said”What’s above a house?”

The dog said “Roof, Roof”

Then for the final time the man asked his dog “What’s the opposite of smooth?”

The dog replied “Rough, Rough”

Very unimpressed the bartender threw them both out of the bar.The dog then turned to his owner and said”Which one did I get wrong?”

The man also asked the dog, "Who was the greatest left handed batter of all time?" The dog said "Ruth, Ruth". the bartender threw them out. The dog look at the man and asked, "Ted Williams"?

 

[Hypoxia]

The past, the present, and the future walked into a bar.


It was tense.

 

[jehoram]

It's obvious, the ROOSTER came first.

The way I heard it, it was the chicken, because the chicken had to get laid before the egg got laid.