Let's hear it for the boys - Gentle FemDom in pics

bT0PIRK.gif

:D:D:D
 
Looking over my shoulder

I can’t walk away from these posts, I keep coming back again and again.

I need to explore these feelings, the sensation and arousal these pictures induce in me.....

Any help much appreciated.
 
Cock cages!!

I ran across this article from Dan Savage about cock cages.

Thought it was interesting, re: the mechanics of how they work:

https://www.thestranger.com/savage-love/2018/03/27/25959473/savage-love


sidenote:

The author of the letter starts out saying this:

I'm in a D/s relationship. I'm not submissive around the clock, but my partner owns my cock

My first thought is if you have the mindset someone "owns" your genitalia, submission *IS* 'round the clock. Actual activities might not occur 24/7 because, you know, real life has to happen. But the mindset that a part of you is owned by someone else is there 24/7, right?

Along with this is the idea that as a submissive, we do things willingly. Not necessarily easily but with a willing heart and mind. (Usually. Haha. As I type this a few images of "WTF? You want me to do what?" are flashing through my brain)

So why try to wriggle out of the cock cage if you can? It's one thing if it just falls off. It's another if you try to wriggle out of it.

Does this man's Owner/Mistress need to get him pierced in order to ensure complete chastity? Or should this man be less interested in trying to escape from his cock cage and just submit to it?

** caveat: again, it's one thing if it just falls off his cock. That being said the article says that doesn't usually happen.
 
I'm in a D/s relationship. I'm not submissive around the clock, but my partner owns my cock

My first thought is if you have the mindset someone "owns" your genitalia, submission *IS* 'round the clock. Actual activities might not occur 24/7 because, you know, real life has to happen. But the mindset that a part of you is owned by someone else is there 24/7, right?

Yes, no, kinda.

There are times when my boyfriend is being submissive, there are times when he’s being SUBMISSIVE, and there are times when he’s my boyfriend, but we’ve agreed the cock is mine 24/7.

When I’m listening to him talk about his day, I’m not topping and he’s not subbing, but the cock is mine. When he gets horny at 2 am and can’t get off because I’m not around to ask permission, he is subbing even if I’m not topping.

Even if that’s not how you would characterize it, it most certainly is how we see it.

So why try to wriggle out of the cock cage if you can? It's one thing if it just falls off. It's another if you try to wriggle out of it.

Because people are human. If you give them a rule that says ‘don’t do X,’ where X is something they like, even if they agree that you have every right to give them a rule, lots of them will struggle with it.

Not to mention that some people crave the feeling of knowing they can’t do something. I mean 100%, cannot do it even if they wanted to. It’s not that uncommon when it comes to bondage. A person wants to be tied down so effectively they’re helpless and nothing they could do might free them.

Or should this man be less interested in trying to escape from his cock cage and just submit to it?

People always don’t do what they should do. Subs are people.

The question isn’t whether he should do X or she needs to do Y, but what works best for them. It may be the piercing or it may be the belt thingy.
 
Yes, no, kinda.

There are times when my boyfriend is being submissive, there are times when he’s being SUBMISSIVE, and there are times when he’s my boyfriend, but we’ve agreed the cock is mine 24/7.

When I’m listening to him talk about his day, I’m not topping and he’s not subbing, but the cock is mine. When he gets horny at 2 am and can’t get off because I’m not around to ask permission, he is subbing even if I’m not topping.

Even if that’s not how you would characterize it, it most certainly is how we see it.



Because people are human. If you give them a rule that says ‘don’t do X,’ where X is something they like, even if they agree that you have every right to give them a rule, lots of them will struggle with it.

Not to mention that some people crave the feeling of knowing they can’t do something. I mean 100%, cannot do it even if they wanted to. It’s not that uncommon when it comes to bondage. A person wants to be tied down so effectively they’re helpless and nothing they could do might free them.


People always don’t do what they should do. Subs are people.

The question isn’t whether he should do X or she needs to do Y, but what works best for them. It may be the piercing or it may be the belt thingy.

He says in the article he doesn't want to be pierced but would do it reluctantly to please her. It does seem like she's going to do Y (pierce him,) because he can't do X (stay in cage).

Of course subs are people. For sure people struggle with rules. And, as you point out, for some subs, there is that element of wanting all choice taken away in order to submit. Perhaps that's the case here.

I took the authors words at face value, that he was reluctant and looking for other options. One option, if piercing his penis is too extreme would be to work a little harder on the mindset that he's always going to escape.

The belt does seem like the better option if piercing is out and escaping out of the cage continues to be an issue.
 
Is it really about the cock cage?

Hi Ladies (cookie and Never)

cookie, thanks for sharing the article. After reading it, I have to say, I found it rather disturbing in regard to the D/s relationship as it was depicted either by the writer or by the editing of his original comments (not sure which).

In my opinion, the use of the cock cage and its function (physical or psychological) was the least important issue brought to light in this article. After reading it, more than once, the relationship itself appears to be significantly flawed...again, IMHO.

First of all, the primary rule of a D/s relationship is "DO NO HARM". The dominant should not harm the sub. The sub should not harm the Dom. In this article, it appears to me that they need to work on the basics of their D/s relationship, specifically on their communication, trust, and boundaries.

1. If his Domme places him in a cage what's behind his need/want to get out of it?Is he being a naughty boy in order to be punished? Does he not respect his dominant enough to follow her wish/command? Is there a physical or psychological need for him to free himself from it? Most importantly, why hasn't the reason behind his behavior been discussed?

If I, as the Dom, make a rule or institute some form of behavior I want followed, and the sub continues to defy it...therefore, defy Me...we have a bigger problem then the breaking of said rule or lack of behavior. We have an issue with the relationship dynamic and that is unacceptable and can not continue.

2. In regard to "DO NO HARM": How can he be trusted if he refuses to use his safe word or at least "yellow" out and discuss his issue with cock piercing? Also, what is the benefit for her, for him, for their relationship by having him pierced? Piercings can be removed also.

If he wants out, he will find a way. This piercing/caging is a surface issue and the real issue lies deeper in the relationship. That is what needs to be identified and discussed/resolved.

3. Is the dominant really placing his 'best interest' at the forefront of her decision? There are times when a dominant needs to make a decision that causes the sub to have to behave or do something that they are not comfortable with, that pushes their limits, or forces them to reach beyond their comfort zone, but there should be a good reason for it. It should have some goal for growth, improvement, development for the sub or the D/s relationship. I don't see the piercing fitting into that scenario.

4. If this dominant "knows" her sub well, she should be able to pick up on his reluctance. I'm not saying doms are mind readers, but it seems pretty obvious that he's really not into the piercing. And, I don't see a short or long term positive effect coming for this D/s partnership from having the piercing.

Basically, I should have simply said..."This D/s couple needs to work on their communication! And TRUST! ;) I believe the cock cage in this instance is symbolism for something much larger...his wanting/needing to escape speaks volumes to me. Not to mention his inability or lack of want to follow her commands. Very little about his behavior and thought process, as described in this article, says submissive to me. :rose:
 
At my mature age, I am beyond body image. Oh, I enjoy the vision of young, supple bodies as much as the the next person. But the cerebral play is much more the aphrodisiac than just firm tits.
The long roads behind us make us who we are. And I am so pleased to see that wisdom here in these forums.

So well stated.
I, too, am at a "mature age" but learned in my youth that the brain is the largest sex organ. Many thanks to Ms. Mary for teaching me.
 
Hi Ladies (cookie and Never)

cookie, thanks for sharing the article. After reading it, I have to say, I found it rather disturbing in regard to the D/s relationship as it was depicted either by the writer or by the editing of his original comments (not sure which).

In my opinion, the use of the cock cage and its function (physical or psychological) was the least important issue brought to light in this article. After reading it, more than once, the relationship itself appears to be significantly flawed...again, IMHO.

First of all, the primary rule of a D/s relationship is "DO NO HARM". The dominant should not harm the sub. The sub should not harm the Dom. In this article, it appears to me that they need to work on the basics of their D/s relationship, specifically on their communication, trust, and boundaries.

1. If his Domme places him in a cage what's behind his need/want to get out of it?Is he being a naughty boy in order to be punished? Does he not respect his dominant enough to follow her wish/command? Is there a physical or psychological need for him to free himself from it? Most importantly, why hasn't the reason behind his behavior been discussed?

If I, as the Dom, make a rule or institute some form of behavior I want followed, and the sub continues to defy it...therefore, defy Me...we have a bigger problem then the breaking of said rule or lack of behavior. We have an issue with the relationship dynamic and that is unacceptable and can not continue.

2. In regard to "DO NO HARM": How can he be trusted if he refuses to use his safe word or at least "yellow" out and discuss his issue with cock piercing? Also, what is the benefit for her, for him, for their relationship by having him pierced? Piercings can be removed also.

If he wants out, he will find a way. This piercing/caging is a surface issue and the real issue lies deeper in the relationship. That is what needs to be identified and discussed/resolved.

3. Is the dominant really placing his 'best interest' at the forefront of her decision? There are times when a dominant needs to make a decision that causes the sub to have to behave or do something that they are not comfortable with, that pushes their limits, or forces them to reach beyond their comfort zone, but there should be a good reason for it. It should have some goal for growth, improvement, development for the sub or the D/s relationship. I don't see the piercing fitting into that scenario.

4. If this dominant "knows" her sub well, she should be able to pick up on his reluctance. I'm not saying doms are mind readers, but it seems pretty obvious that he's really not into the piercing. And, I don't see a short or long term positive effect coming for this D/s partnership from having the piercing.

Basically, I should have simply said..."This D/s couple needs to work on their communication! And TRUST! ;) I believe the cock cage in this instance is symbolism for something much larger...his wanting/needing to escape speaks volumes to me. Not to mention his inability or lack of want to follow her commands. Very little about his behavior and thought process, as described in this article, says submissive to me. :rose:

Hi Eden! This is a well thought out response. I especially like this part of #1 -

If I, as the Dom, make a rule or institute some form of behavior I want followed, and the sub continues to defy it...therefore, defy Me...we have a bigger problem then the breaking of said rule or lack of behavior. We have an issue with the relationship dynamic and that is unacceptable and can not continue.

Thanks.
 
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