my cock is so big...
- Thread starter silverwhisper
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silverwhisper
just this guy, you know?
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...i need to be strapped down when i ejaculate for fear of flying through walls when i ejaculate.
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silverwhisper
just this guy, you know?
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...it's gonna MC the oscars this year!
midwestyankee
Literotica Guru
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...that its own cock is too big to be in porno.
silverwhisper
just this guy, you know?
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that may or may not be my name, though... 
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EJFan
Absolute Genius
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every time i see the phrase "may or may not" i think of that short-lived howie mandel sit com from the 80's. i can't remember the name but he worked at a place called sincerity mortuary. the town's mayor died and howie creamated him. well, the family had a fit when they found out so he should them the instructions he received for preparing the body. he said, "look... it says right here, 'may or may not be creamated." to which the widow replied, "that's MAYOR may not be creamated."silverwhisper said:that may or may not be my name, though...
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TBKahuna123
Back in the Sunshine
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My cock is so big...
...it's the nemesis in the next Godzilla picture.
...I had Tolstoy's War and Peace tatooed in one long sentence down the shaft.
...I can stir your drink from here.
...it has a no fly zone around it....it was a stunt double for the bridge in Bridge Over the River Kwai.
...It has a 3rd degree black belt in poon-fu.
...it's running for President in 2008. (Just what we need, a bigger prick in the White House
)
...it's the nemesis in the next Godzilla picture.
...I had Tolstoy's War and Peace tatooed in one long sentence down the shaft.
...I can stir your drink from here.
...it has a no fly zone around it....it was a stunt double for the bridge in Bridge Over the River Kwai.
...It has a 3rd degree black belt in poon-fu.
...it's running for President in 2008. (Just what we need, a bigger prick in the White House
)
bisexplicit
but i'm a lesbian
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- Mar 1, 2005
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- 28,710
silverwhisper said:that may or may not be my name, though...
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That would be such obnoxious dedication of yours if it wasn't. I'd be quite impressed.
silverwhisper
just this guy, you know?
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bah, you're my sister: impressing you is achieved by leaving you alone. :>
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MagicFingers
Literotica Guru
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- Jan 27, 2003
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OHH, that hurts
My cock is so big...
it's flogging M's girl all the way in the Netherlands, From California! 
Please check out my last post on the "How to make people laugh" thread.M's girl said:But...... but.......
doesn't that go for the men with small penises too?
(sorry.... I could not resist)
My cock is so big...
it's flogging M's girl all the way in the Netherlands, From California!
Quoll
Area 25
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- Oct 17, 2004
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- 10,886
bobsgirl said:
The mind boggles.
911 : You have reached 911, plesae state the nature of your emergency.
My favourite elk has a penis
911 : That's very nice maam, but I'm afraid that is not an emergency.
You don't understand, everyday I go to look at the elk and today he has a penis.
911 : Well maam, I think you will find it has had a penis everyday, perhaps you only just noticed it today.
No it has definitely never been there before.
911 : Perhaps you have never looked in that particular spot before, I suspect that their penises are not always visible.
Not visible! It's over two and a half feet long.
911 : My that is impressive.
It's not impressive it's disgusting.
911 : Well it's only natural maam.
I don't think it's natural for a two and a half foot penis to appear overnight.
911 : Well maam I'm afraid there is nothing much I can do, there is no law against an elk having a penis, even one that large.
Would you care to tell me where you are?
I'm leaning up against the penis as I speak.
911 : I don't think that is such a good idea, you could get seriously hurt.
Well I'm not standing for it.
911 : I hope you are not suggesting what I think you are suggesting.
I'm going to pull it off.
911 : Now maam it is my duty to inform you that it is against the law to have any sort of sexual relations with animals, no matter how well endowed they are.
911 : Hello?... maam?... are you there?
TBKahuna123
Back in the Sunshine
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Buwahahaahaquoll said:
Things you won't see on Rescue 911!
bobsgirl
Jiggly
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quoll said:
I'm really curious to hear if they ever removed the offending member.
Awhile back a large tree in our neighborhood had some "tree surgery", and they got this poor thing but good. All the upper branches were cut back to short little bits, except for one big limb that stuck out perpendicular to the tree's trunk. Now, maybe I have a dirty mind, but it looked exactly like an erect penis. Gives new meaning to the term "morning wood". It was hilarious.
It didn't stay that way for long. Apparently someone else saw the same thing I did, and the limb was removed a couple days later.
midwestyankee
Literotica Guru
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Maybe it was on cialis....minimum effect of 36 hours, you know.EJFan said:
silverwhisper
just this guy, you know?
- Joined
- Mar 30, 2005
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- 11,319
...i need to use inner tubes for condoms.
...i'm required to register it with the police as a weapon in several states.
...i tend to pass out when turned on.
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...i'm required to register it with the police as a weapon in several states.
...i tend to pass out when turned on.
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