Oh boy, I'm in over my head.

[Adakgirl]

I'm not exactly sure what you're referring to. I can't think of anything of consequence that she has told me which wasn't either self-evident or something that I haven't confirmed.

I was referring to these things you said about her.

completely submissive sexually. Needless to say she has far more experience in this area than I do

Yeah, it blew my mind too but she's been with a few much older men.

You can confirm she has been with a few older men, (more than once even and not just one night stands) and she was completely sexually submissive with them? What I mean to ask is this... do you assume that it is from these older men and other men too that she gained her wide experience in Dominance/submission? Yet she has not been in a serious D/s relationship at all yet? It sounds to me as if she has just passively allowed older men and possibly other men too to do whatever they wanted to do to her sexually, behind closed doors and she liked it so she thinks she is completely submissive sexually.

THAT is of great consequence in my opinion. Having such wide and varied sexual experience and becoming sexual mature at a young age tells me she submits to men sexually because she wants and needs men to like her, to love her possibly, to praise her for her sexual abilities, that boosts her ego. She needs to have sex in order to feel good about herself and that is how she is trying to build self- esteem.

Look never mind..I lost my virginity to my 23yr old b/f when I was 13yrs old. But I won't go into that...I am regressing. Trust me by the time I was 17 like this girl, I was as sexually mature as a 30yr old woman. It was NOT a healthy way to grow into a young adult. I wish MY 23yr old bf at 13 or my 26yr old bf at 17 ..whom I lived with.. had cared about me enough to say hey you dont have to show me love this way it's ok...I care about you not what you can give me.

 

[Daddy2mylilgirl]

No, it isn't.

And because I don't want to have to delete this thread, I'm going to ask everyone to please read the forum rules and conduct this conversation accordingly.

Age of consent in some states is 17.

Thus making it legal for a 23yo to have sex with a 17yo.

 

[JMohegan]

Off topic, sort of.
You just made me me very homesick.
More than I was already.
(Thinking of the cherry blossoms lately)

~LB

(who wishes she could have been one of those people in the photo)

And I have no idea what you guys were talking about. I just read up 2 or 3. Short attention span tonight, I think...

I wish I had been there, too!

I've been to St. Louis several times, but never noticed cherry blossoms. Where are they clustered?

 

[JMohegan]

I was in DC the weekend before last, it was absolutely beautiful.

Incidentally, I bowled in the White House lanes. I've been meaning to drop that somehow.

Do tell! With Obama?

 

[Marquis]

Do tell! With Obama?

Unfortunately not, Obama was in Iraq while I was using his lanes, and I hear he doesn't use them very often anyway.

For full disclosure, I should mention that the Harry S. Truman Lanes were actually moved from the White House proper to the Old Executive Building, which is where I used them. Part of the White House administrative complex, but not quite the same as bowling like... under Barack's kitchen.

 

[Marquis]

I wish I had been there, too!

I've been to St. Louis several times, but never noticed cherry blossoms. Where are they clustered?

You are feeling testy today!

 

[Marquis]

Age of consent in some states is 17.

Thus making it legal for a 23yo to have sex with a 17yo.

Yes, but the transmission of nude images of a minor is always a crime.

 

[JMohegan]

You are feeling testy today!

Not trying to sound east coast elitist. I honestly didn't know that St. Louis has cherry blossoms.

I've been thinking of them as Japanese, and gifts to DC. But they could be brought anywhere the climate's right, clearly. Chalk this up to horticultural ignorance.

 

[JMohegan]

Unfortunately not, Obama was in Iraq while I was using his lanes, and I hear he doesn't use them very often anyway.

For full disclosure, I should mention that the Harry S. Truman Lanes were actually moved from the White House proper to the Old Executive Building, which is where I used them. Part of the White House administrative complex, but not quite the same as bowling like... under Barack's kitchen.

Obama aside, using the lanes anywhere in that complex is still pretty cool. How did you get in?

 

[Marquis]

Not trying to sound east coast elitist. I honestly didn't know that St. Louis has cherry blossoms.

I've been thinking of them as Japanese, and gifts to DC. But they could be brought anywhere the climate's right, clearly. Chalk this up to horticultural ignorance.

Do they have cherry blossoms in St. Louis? I assumed LilyBart thought it was DC and I followed suit.

Obama aside, using the lanes anywhere in that complex is still pretty cool. How did you get in?

It was pretty cool.

I went up for an event with my fraternity. One of the brothers works for the white house and convinced whoever to let a bunch of us come use the lanes.

 

[JMohegan]

Do they have cherry blossoms in St. Louis? I assumed LilyBart thought it was DC and I followed suit.



It was pretty cool.

I went up for an event with my fraternity. One of the brothers works for the white house and convinced whoever to let a bunch of us come use the lanes.

Oh, I assumed LB knew it was St. Louis, and was homesick for that city; then her mention of cherry blossoms reminded you of DC.

A frat brother working in the White House is fortuitous, no doubt! Glad you had fun.

 

[HarlotMinx]

As you indicated however, it is possible that we are much different. Me being some sort of troglodyte and you being the enlightened heart-felt sex offender.

*snickers* For some reason those two sentences are highly amusing to say the least.

 

[LilyBart]

Oh, I assumed LB knew it was St. Louis, and was homesick for that city; then her mention of cherry blossoms reminded you of DC.

A frat brother working in the White House is fortuitous, no doubt! Glad you had fun.

Hah! I didn't even look at the top of the photo...just the crowd...

I'm still homesick though...for DC, not St Louis.
Nothing wrong with St Louis, though. And I've never seen cherry blossoms in St Louis either, so you can shake of that horticultural ignorance JM. Although I suppose there could be some, they couldn't possibly be as pretty as the ones in DC.

And boy did this thread go off topic...

~LB

 

[BrianRUtay]

This is, of course, true. Usually when you're talking about teenage girls though, it's more cock than mind. My sub of 2 years is 24 and rarely does she say something that excites me as much as catching her coming out of the shower.

Maybe I'm easily impressed but she has a wild imagination and says just the right thing. It's like getting punched in the gut and my brain turns into mush. So I really mean it when I say I'm more interested in her in an intellectual way, whether its sexual or not. I never thought I'd encounter a female who was hornier and more eager than I was but there ya go.

As you indicated however, it is possible that we are much different. Me being some sort of troglodyte and you being the enlightened heart-felt sex offender.

Under the circumstances, I suppose that's an apt description of me. I'm pretty sure what I'm doing isn't a moral abomination though.

 

[BrianRUtay]

You can confirm she has been with a few older men, (more than once even and not just one night stands) and she was completely sexually submissive with them? What I mean to ask is this... do you assume that it is from these older men and other men too that she gained her wide experience in Dominance/submission? Yet she has not been in a serious D/s relationship at all yet? It sounds to me as if she has just passively allowed older men and possibly other men too to do whatever they wanted to do to her sexually, behind closed doors and she liked it so she thinks she is completely submissive sexually.

Yes, I'm positive she isn't spinning tales. I've seen the guys and have heard phone conversations with one. They dominate her but she hasn't been a true D/s relationship because they aren't into it as an actual lifestyle or fetish. Maybe more of her knowledge and apparent expertise is from her own fantasies and some of the literature she's read (you won't be surprised to hear she's a lover of Nabokov's Lolita). So I think it's deeper than that: this is what turns her on and is not the result of one external incident.

THAT is of great consequence in my opinion. Having such wide and varied sexual experience and becoming sexual mature at a young age tells me she submits to men sexually because she wants and needs men to like her, to love her possibly, to praise her for her sexual abilities, that boosts her ego. She needs to have sex in order to feel good about herself and that is how she is trying to build self- esteem.

That could describe most any teenage girl. There's no doubt she gets off on the attention (I make her blush A LOT) but she doesn't seem desperate for it. From what I know she isn't flirtatious with just anyone who shows the slightest bit of attention and she claims to never notice guys checking her out in public. And it can't be the case she has so much sex simply for male approval since she pleasures herself at a frequency not even I could match!

I wish MY 23yr old bf at 13 or my 26yr old bf at 17 ..whom I lived with.. had cared about me enough to say hey you dont have to show me love this way it's ok...I care about you not what you can give me.

She doesn't have to worry about anything like this with me.

 

[Marquis]

Maybe I'm easily impressed but she has a wild imagination and says just the right thing. It's like getting punched in the gut and my brain turns into mush. So I really mean it when I say I'm more interested in her in an intellectual way, whether its sexual or not. I never thought I'd encounter a female who was hornier and more eager than I was but there ya go.

Can you maybe see why the blue sentence is kinda hard to believe when it's directly followed by the red one?

This reminds me of the South Park episode where one of the little girls in the class starts growing breasts and all of a sudden all the boys notice her and think everything she says is so smart and charming.

Under the circumstances, I suppose that's an apt description of me. I'm pretty sure what I'm doing isn't a moral abomination though.

Well, you don't seem to have lost your sense of humor, which I can appreciate.

I don't have a bone to pick with you here man. I have my own reasons for being interested in this conversation and am figuring out my own stuff too. It isn't that I wouldn't fuck an 18 year old. I'd probably go younger if it was legal. But I wouldn't lie to myself about what I was doing and why, or at least I'd try not to.

What I can't help but wonder in your situation is, why is it that you are "pretty sure what [you're] doing isn't a moral abomination though. "?

Is it because she has already had sex with older men, and is now "fair game"? I don't know how anyone else is reading this, but it certainly comes across that way to me.

Even a nine year old can learn how to suck a dick. Unfortunately, many nine year olds do. That doesn't make it ok to get a BJ from a nine year old.

Will you at least admit that it's not ok to get a BJ from a nine year old?

 

[BiBunny]

I could possibly be wrong, but I thought the age of consent thing only applied when BOTH parties were underage or within two or three years of one another. Not "oh, she's a minor, but she's over the age of consent, so I can bone her, anyway."

Also, I'll be glad to edit or delete my post if it's not kosher.

 

[BrianRUtay]

Can you maybe see why the blue sentence is kinda hard to believe when it's directly followed by the red one?

When I wrote that I realized it could easily be misread and should have re-worded it. Check again and you'll see there's no inconsistency. I was saying I'm more preoccupied with her mind and personality over her sexuality (as much as I'm obsessed with that). In the next sentence I was giving further evidence of that fact by explaining that SHE is more into doing sexual things, without me having to tell her to do anything. Sometimes I need to stop her because she's so eager. That's why I said it was weird...we have plenty of conversation and foreplay but she starts talking 'dirty' out of nowhere.

This reminds me of the South Park episode where one of the little girls in the class starts growing breasts and all of a sudden all the boys notice her and think everything she says is so smart and charming.

I'm not Eric Cartman. If she was ugly and flat instead of breathtaking and a 34C I'd still be dying to get to know her and think she was brilliant. I just wouldn't daydream about her on a constant basis with a raging hard-on. And I would argue that guys give dumb hot chicks undeserved attention but I don't think most delude themselves into believing they are rocket scientists.

What I can't help but wonder in your situation is, why is it that you are "pretty sure what [you're] doing isn't a moral abomination though."?

Is it because she has already had sex with older men, and is now "fair game"? I don't know how anyone else is reading this, but it certainly comes across that way to me.

In one breath you say you don't have a bone to pick and in the next you're virtually fingering me as Chester the Molester.

How can you possibly compare the cognitive, emotional and sexual ability/maturity of a prepubescent child with a remarkably intelligent and erudite teenager of nearly 18??? This isn't an area of simple disagreement; you sound batshit insane. Once again, I just turned 23 -- this isn't a case of an adult male exploiting a young child. The attraction has been mutual and I feel like her peer in most respects.

Will you at least admit that it's not ok to get a BJ from a nine year old?

Let the record state that I am in firm opposition to the sexual abuse of nine-year-old children. Furthermore, feasting on the flesh of human babies is repugnant and should be outlawed. I know my moral compass is quite radical but these humane visions shall one day be mainstream and taken for granted.

 

[JMohegan]

Is it because she has already had sex with older men, and is now "fair game"? I don't know how anyone else is reading this, but it certainly comes across that way to me.

I'm reading the OP as a guy totally turned on by a woman whom he finds physically hot, but also perceives to be way more experienced and imaginative than he is.

Sort of a combination of a younger, relatively inexperienced guy turned on by a confident and knowledgeable 30-something woman he hopes will teach him something, and an older guy lusting for a nubile teen.

It's coming across to me not so much as a "fair game" issue, but rather his apparent impression that the time spent with older men gives her experience and ideas that he finds appealing.

 

[Marquis]

Let the record state that I am in firm opposition to the sexual abuse of nine-year-old children. Furthermore, feasting on the flesh of human babies is repugnant and should be outlawed. I know my moral compass is quite radical but these humane visions shall one day be mainstream and taken for granted.

Well, I'm glad we are in some agreement here.


Look, you started this thread (titled "Oh boy, I'm in over my head") asking for advice on how to be more dominant and in control. You're inhibiting your ability to do just that with the circular bullshit you're feeding yourself here.

Take a step back and say to yourself... "I just want to fuck this little teen bitch."

If you can't say that you might as well just have her put the cuffs on you.

 

[Marquis]

I'm reading the OP as a guy totally turned on by a woman whom he finds physically hot, but also perceives to be way more experienced and imaginative than he is.

Sort of a combination of a younger, relatively inexperienced guy turned on by a confident and knowledgeable 30-something woman he hopes will teach him something, and an older guy lusting for a nubile teen.

It's coming across to me not so much as a "fair game" issue, but rather his apparent impression that the time spent with older men gives her experience and ideas that he finds appealing.

Hmmmm.

This could be fair, perhaps I'm projecting my own predatory nature here.

 

[JMohegan]

Well, I'm glad we are in some agreement here.


Look, you started this thread (titled "Oh boy, I'm in over my head") asking for advice on how to be more dominant and in control. You're inhibiting your ability to do just that with the circular bullshit you're feeding yourself here.

Take a step back and say to yourself... "I just want to fuck this little teen bitch."

If you can't say that you might as well just have her put the cuffs on you.

Nothing about this guy reads as dominant to me.

I agree that the cuffs are (metaphorically) on him in this situation, though not for the reason you mention.

 

[BrianRUtay]

Look, you started this thread (titled "Oh boy, I'm in over my head") asking for advice on how to be more dominant and in control. You're inhibiting your ability to do just that with the circular bullshit you're feeding yourself here.

Take a step back and say to yourself... "I just want to fuck this little teen bitch."

If you can't say that you might as well just have her put the cuffs on you.

Ugh, maybe I've come to the wrong place.

If being Dominant means wanting nothing more than to "fuck this little teen bitch" and being a run-of-the-mill asshole then I guess no, I don't fit the bill and (hopefully) never will.

And I have said that to her 'in the moment.' All I'm trying to get across here is that I don't have a one-track mind. I don't know why the focus of this thread has been centered on how I'm allegedly inventing and exaggerating the situation.

I needed some info on D/s so I came to a D/s forum. I wasn't looking to get the 3rd degree on how I'm just like you and should give up the charade.

 

[BrianRUtay]

Apparently JMohegan's comments are about me but to the Marquis so I'll just go ahead and ignore them.

 

[Netzach]

Maybe more of her knowledge and apparent expertise is from her own fantasies and some of the literature she's read (you won't be surprised to hear she's a lover of Nabokov's Lolita).

I suggest you read this book if you have not, more closely. And that you quit ignoring people who are giving decent advice you don't want to hear. All I'm seeing is a 23 year old being led by his balls. Into some webcam shit that could put him in federal prison the rest of his natural fucking life - do you even know US law?

It doesn't sound to me like this person is necessarily the most submissive.

It seems to me that you ARE in over your head if your intent is to lead here.