Pmann wants to talk mental health

[aussiegeekygal]

I believe every child should be forced to watch Arrested Development to see how bad some families could be. Plus, it’s just a good show.

How horrible is it that I see my mother in Lucille one?

 

[Apisto42]

I believe every child should be forced to watch Arrested Development to see how bad some families could be. Plus, it’s just a good show.

I can’t watch shows about dysfunctional families. It’s either what I went through or worse what my wife went through and it just makes me sad. Even if it’s a comedy. Action, comedy or documentary for me. British mysteries as well.

 

[aussiegeekygal]

I can’t watch shows about dysfunctional families. It’s either what I went through or worse what my wife went through and it just makes me sad. Even if it’s a comedy. Action, comedy or documentary for me. British mysteries as well.

That rules out most TV then

The character I relate to most is Fiona Gallagher on Shameless. It's crazy how much I took her bad decisions personally.

 

[Apisto42]

That rules out most TV then

The character I relate to most is Fiona Gallagher on Shameless. It's crazy how much I took her bad decisions personally.

That’s why I play a lot of Animal Crossing….

Seriously, mental health is a big deal. Reach out and talk to someone until you get what you need. There’s someone somewhere that will help.

 

[jaF0]

Reach out

Just ending the use of that phrase would be a huge win for me.

 

[Apisto42]

Just ending the use of that phrase would be a huge win for me.

Sure. Instead of “reach out” insert the phrase of your choice which means “get the fuck out of your own fucking head and communicate with another human, preferably one who has some empathy, compassion, and the ability to communicate in meaningful words.” You do you boo.

That game got me through endless lockdown. Wanna…visit my island?

View attachment 2160273

I sailed there once. In a little sailor hat. It was barren of boobies.

 

[AngelWithAShotgun]

Sure. Instead of “reach out” insert the phrase of your choice which means “get the fuck out of your own fucking head and communicate with another human, preferably one who has some empathy, compassion, and the ability to communicate in meaningful words.” You do you boo.

Harsh words. Personally, I think reach out would apply to people who can reach out. People who have joy to share. If you're not in the right headspace, I don't think reaching out is even possible. Let alone getting the fuck out of your own fucking head. Otherwise, we all wouldn't have any problems.

So if you have joy in your life to share, take the time to reach out to the distant ones. The happy, funny, ever perfect but aloof people. Not just the quiet ones. The people who suffer in silence usually need help the most. They are usually the ones incapable of asking for the help they need.

Dickheads also fall in this category. Though it takes a lot more strength to reach out to them. To people that do, kudos to you kid. Keep calm and carry on

 

[Apisto42]

To each their own, though both pain and joy are each satiated through sharing. Just my personal experience of having both times of extreme pain and joy. The first time was the hardest.

 

[hotwords229_A]

Sure. Instead of “reach out” insert the phrase of your choice which means “get the fuck out of your own fucking head and communicate with another human, preferably one who has some empathy, compassion, and the ability to communicate in meaningful words.” You do you boo.

Harsh words. Personally, I think reach out would apply to people who can reach out. People who have joy to share. If you're not in the right headspace, I don't think reaching out is even possible. Let alone getting the fuck out of your own fucking head. Otherwise, we all wouldn't have any problems.

So if you have joy in your life to share, take the time to reach out to the distant ones. The happy, funny, ever perfect but aloof people. Not just the quiet ones. The people who suffer in silence usually need help the most. They are usually the ones incapable of asking for the help they need.

Dickheads also fall in this category. Though it takes a lot more strength to reach out to them. To people that do, kudos to you kid. Keep calm and carry on

“get the fuck out of your own fucking head and communicate with another human, preferably one who has some empathy, compassion, and the ability to communicate in meaningful words.”

I get this statement and these exact words would totally work on me if I was in a bad place. Thankfully I have friends who would kick my ass in the right direction if necessary.

In many ways, life is all about the people around you, people who know you and who can talk to you in the right way.

Similar to a savings account, you have to invest in people that are worth investing in so you can drain them of all resources when someone invents a bigger TV, I mean, when you need help.

 

[Lord Pmann]

I get what Apisto and HWs is saying. Sometimes it’s better to have someone speak your language. Some people can’t deal with bluntness. Others need it.

 

[Trekka]

^but either way, you need people. Others. Gotta build a support network.

And I’m learning right now that these networks change over time. Sometimes there’s a big turnover!
I asked my best friend last year to call me. Multiple times. Told her “I am depressed. I can’t pick up the phone. Can you please call me?” And I meant it. She’s a therapist for a living, so you’d think she’d understand. I said it multiple times. How much more clear can I be?

No dice. So, that’s her journey now.

And with that friendship went many others, sadly. My mental health took a major hit.

So the reconstruction began.

Takes action, and work, to rebuild. Reassess. Figure out what my needs are, now, and go about filling them.

*cues up the team building montage*

I’ve been chipping away at it. Takes time to build relationships. I don’t expect magic overnight.

I’m grateful for the friends and family that have stuck by me.

And I’m open to talking to whatever new people come my way - sometimes I make a conscious effort to put down my phone and chit chat with strangers. Party like it’s 1999. Make eye contact. Exchange digits. Make calls. Go have the coffee. Get the lunch. IT IS ARDUOUS.

There’s this saying “I can’t think my way into right acting, I gotta act my way into right thinking.” —> that reminder, plus a decent support network, is everything. For me. Maybe different things meet that need for others.

Also, it’s my choice to utilize that network or not. Put up the bat signal. Light the beacons.

Sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I need to sit in it for a spell.

And that’s okay too.
If people want to sit in it, I try to allow them the dignity to make their own choice to do so.

But at the end of the day, as much as I hate it, my happiness is my responsibility. I can dip into the team for hugs and high fives or ass kickings and tough love, but after that, I gotta Actually Do The Things.

 

[aussiegeekygal]

But at the end of the day, as much as I hate it, my happiness is my responsibility

I hate it too, babe
And you deserve all the happiness in the fucking world

 

[Lord Pmann]

But at the end of the day, as much as I hate it, my happiness is my responsibility. I can dip into the team for hugs and high fives or ass kickings and tough love, but after that, I gotta Actually Do The Things.

Now you’re really talking crazy talk.

 

[jaF0]

Happiness is fictional.

 

[AngelWithAShotgun]

Happiness is fictional.

Fiction is real in the mind it calls home.

 

[Dribble]

^but either way, you need people. Others. Gotta build a support network.

And I’m learning right now that these networks change over time. Sometimes there’s a big turnover!
I asked my best friend last year to call me. Multiple times. Told her “I am depressed. I can’t pick up the phone. Can you please call me?” And I meant it. She’s a therapist for a living, so you’d think she’d understand. I said it multiple times. How much more clear can I be?

No dice. So, that’s her journey now.

And with that friendship went many others, sadly. My mental health took a major hit.

So the reconstruction began.

Takes action, and work, to rebuild. Reassess. Figure out what my needs are, now, and go about filling them.

*cues up the team building montage*

I’ve been chipping away at it. Takes time to build relationships. I don’t expect magic overnight.

I’m grateful for the friends and family that have stuck by me.

And I’m open to talking to whatever new people come my way - sometimes I make a conscious effort to put down my phone and chit chat with strangers. Party like it’s 1999. Make eye contact. Exchange digits. Make calls. Go have the coffee. Get the lunch. IT IS ARDUOUS.

There’s this saying “I can’t think my way into right acting, I gotta act my way into right thinking.” —> that reminder, plus a decent support network, is everything. For me. Maybe different things meet that need for others.

Also, it’s my choice to utilize that network or not. Put up the bat signal. Light the beacons.

Sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I need to sit in it for a spell.

And that’s okay too.
If people want to sit in it, I try to allow them the dignity to make their own choice to do so.

But at the end of the day, as much as I hate it, my happiness is my responsibility. I can dip into the team for hugs and high fives or ass kickings and tough love, but after that, I gotta Actually Do The Things.

Damn girl...you hit the nail on the head in so many ways. But remember...you are never really alone. Our friends' job is not to provide us with the answers...but to remind us we already have the answers.

 

[SassySheDevil]

What @Trekka said. Sometimes it takes the worst of your life stories to realize who is really going to be there to help pick you up when you fall.
I've always been the one to say "If you need something, I am here" but when I needed someone. Many backed away. Which then made me sink even lower. I hate that when I feel things falling apart, I slide into my own world and push everyone else away. Many know me well enough to not let me go too far down that hole. But others just faded away. There are many that I miss. But in the end. I know that they didn't want to be there and I can't make them.
There were days (and still are) I didn't want to get out of bed. I had to make myself. But like Trekka said. Sometimes the support system that you do have is what makes you. Even when we need a push. That is okay. I was also very lucky to find an amazing therapist.
I hope that someday asking for help is not looked at as being weak. I hope that someday it is just natural.

 

[Trekka]

A Mental Health PSA from the Broadway musical Hamilton:

 

[jaF0]

^^ There's someone in my head, but it's not me.

 

[aussiegeekygal]

 

[Apisto42]

I had this thought in my head for a long time at one point. YMMV but it was soothing for me:

Might as well get to it today. I can always kill myself tomorrow.

 

[cascadiabound]

I had this thought in my head for a long time at one point. YMMV but it was soothing for me:

Might as well get to it today. I can always kill myself tomorrow.

Please take care of yourself.... today, tomorrow and the next day.

 

[Apisto42]

Please take care of yourself.... today, tomorrow and the next day.

Oh, I did. That was years ago. AGG post above just reminded me of it.

It also always reminded me that there is tomorrow.

 

[jaF0]

Other than waving at someone driving by, I don't think I've seen another person in person since Friday the first.

 

[SassySheDevil]

I was also big on quotes. I have a book of quotes I write down as I find them to help me lift myself back up when I need them. Many of them are mental health related. Sometimes just getting out of bed to read them was hard. Other days I must have written down a 100 and then felt like I'd conquered the day.