It's incredibly unfortunate. For me, situations like this solidify my reasons for not wanting to be monogamous, especially in a marriage.
You're not able to come multiple times in a day?
That's what makes me feel so weird and wrong. I simply don't desire sex anymore.
Very fair. Do you still actually enjoy the sex after so many years?
If I knew then what was to come, I'd have steered well clear as well. Not that I was having tons of success dating women but at least, still, it was somewhat more hopeful
I meant sex with your wife. Do you still have fun in the bedroom with her even though the sex has become routine?
I hear you brother. I really do.
Sex is always fun. Not the level as excitement at it was but we have fun.
You're not alone. You didn't indicate if you're married, age, etc.. But after 42 years of marriage and being a relatively healthy 65 yr old male, masturbation's almost my entire sex life. My wife still accommodates me but you can imagine it's pretty routine. And the older we've gotten, the more routine it's become. My frustration is that she works from home so my private time has become severely compromised since I retired 2 yrs ago. I grab any opportunity to rub one off when I can and now it's mostly to gay/bi porn. I guess I'm fantasying more about the taboo these days since the traditional relationship has become what it is. Regarding never having the need not to masturbate in a relationship is also foreign to me since I've always had a strong sex drive and satisfied myself accordingly.
The sex has gotten more routine for us too. I'm 30, and I've been married for going on eight years. We actually started our marriage as an open marriage, but the marriage is now closed at her behest. I've always had my complaints about our sex life, but things were manageable and still enjoyable in the earlier days when we were open. But the combination of closing the relationship and having kids has been the death knell for our sex life. I feel trapped in a scenario where I love my wife and have no intention of leaving, but I am also deeply dissatisfied with our sex life and nothing has worked so far to significantly improve our sexual connection.
Your story is not unique. Many women hate that their mates masturbate.I wouldn't feel embarrassed or ashamed. There's too much pressure for anyone to be in a relationship, or have a partner.
And sometimes we can find the right person for us emotionally but not mentally or physically.
I was in a 25 year commitment/marriage/yadda...I put so much shame on him for masturbating and watching porn that I am ashamed of myself now that he's gone.
Now, jump to the last few years... And all I do is lust for men who masturbate and freely watch porn
I also know masturbation can feel best alone. (With no other person IRL or wherever)
Unless you find someone that shares your kinks, fetishes, desires... Orgasms and pleasure won't feel best with them, IMO...
I think this is the case for a lot of married men. Sex ends up higher on the priority bar for us than it does our wives. This means we either are frustrated sexually or seem like a chore our wives have to do.
perfectly said!
In the marriage, sex was viewed a majority of time by my spouse as about procreation. Sometimes it was outstanding (humbly, through my efforts), but most of the time it was less than satisfying.
Are you replacing me as your preferred toy?
You will always be my favourite sex-toy, Babe.
Finding that special someone is very difficult
