Punching, kicking, etc. in D/s...

[Johnny Mayberry]

Hey for those liking the real rough stuff, have ya seen "Payback" with Mel Gibson, Gregg Henry, Lucy Liu, James Coburn. The savage mistress, played by Liu, punches (in the stomach) and kicks "Val" (Henry), one of the bad guys, and takes a few herself. It's a lovely 'noir' type film. Of course when "Porter" (Mel) finally has to beat her a bit, she's really turned on, and offers to play, iirc.

Great film, never really thought about the rough stuff before....I'll have to watch it again!

 

[Netzach]

The scenes that got my juices flowing hugely were all man-on-man punching scenes, that and two skinny punks trading slaps and kisses in a stairwell...man it was hot.

My first witness to an SM scene.

I could never find a man willing to punch, really punch, my overtly femme frame. Dammit. And if he did he wanted to fuck me after, and that really would ruin the momentum and the mood.

People wonder why I gave up bottoming, it wasn't for going at it too hard once.

 

[Johnny Mayberry]

You a big fan of Fight Club?


There is just something about punching someone...and hell, even taking a punch.

 

[Pure]

Haven't yet seen 'Fight Club', though I did like the film [Added: Girlfight] about this p.r'n young woman who becomes a boxer. that actress [Rodriguez] is HOT.

 

[psiberzerker]

I'd like to cast my vote for fight club too, though we never got to see it, I imagine the love scenes involved a lot of mutual abuse. Payback was awesome, but I'm not all about that Lucy Ling, or whatever. Byegones. No matter what, I just can't believe her as an ice bitch, she's got too much of a sense of humor.
Another good one is Girlfight. Though it doesn't involve any Ds per se, I'm all about girls who can throw punches. Michelle Rodriguez is my kind of woman, especially for a hispanic. A bit compact, but sturdy, and lots of muscle. I'd be willing to bet she can take a pounding, and give it back IRL.
Back to the subject at hand, I gotta love punching, kicking, slapping, scratching, and biting in bed. Work with what god gave ya, it'll save money on whips, floggers, paddles, and soldering irons. It's got a lovely visceral feel to it, the nice thuddy impact of knuckles with a slight stingy meat slap will temper me like nothing else some times.

 

[ownedsubgal]

*grins*


Sometimes, it is just better to skip to the main event isn't it? All the rest of it seems to exist to simulate the primal feeling of punching, or being punched...

i guess that depends on what you consider to be the main event.


for me the thrill in all of this is being overtaken/overpowered by someone purely masculine, and physically superior. after a good beating, where i've been punched all over, then kicked in the groin a few times for good measure, on my knees on the floor, looking up at him and all that ready muscle looking down on me...just makes me feel so ULTRA feminine. old fashioned, and even primal, i know, but that's the vibe we put off.

 

[Johnny Mayberry]

i guess that depends on what you consider to be the main event.


for me the thrill in all of this is being overtaken/overpowered by someone purely masculine, and physically superior. after a good beating, where i've been punched all over, then kicked in the groin a few times for good measure, on my knees on the floor, looking up at him and all that ready muscle looking down on me...just makes me feel so ULTRA feminine. old fashioned, and even primal, i know, but that's the vibe we put off.

By 'main event', I was making a play on words, the whole 'boxing' think...but, honestly, any other hitting is a pale imitation of just punching or kicking someone.

 

[ownedsubgal]

By 'main event', I was making a play on words, the whole 'boxing' think...but, honestly, any other hitting is a pale imitation of just punching or kicking someone.

ahh...see your point there definitely...although i crave variety, nothing seems as "real" to me as the pain induced purely by someone's body, rather than a tool such as a whip or belt.

 

[Netzach]

I did love Fight Club. well I thought it was both brilliant and flawed. But brilliant enough that I'm still thinking about it regularly. It's got some really hot, unconstructed BDSM content in it.

And that hand-kiss scene got me wet. I'm a sick fuck.

 

[Tiestheknots]

BDSM punching

I have never punched anyone in a BDSM scene, although I do love the open hand spank on a deserving derriere! I was an amateur boxer in the Army and think punching someone would be very dangerous. I have broken opponents jaws, noses, collarbones and ribs in very controlled circumstances and wearing gloves. Punching a sub could lead to very serious injuries.

I found the movie "Fight Club" to be fascinating and really weird. I also thought the fight scenes looked pretty fake, but then I know what it is like to take a hard punch.

Be careful out there!

 

[ownedsubgal]

Ties...it's true there are bodily risks to punching, even when one is careful and knowledgeable, but that is the case with everything in this lifestyle. and for me, part of the thrill. i confessed to my Master recently that i felt he was punching me too lightly/gently...being too careful...i told him i really wanted him to HURT me...even if something severe happened, that would be fine with me and i'd view my injury as a beautiful symbol of our love and his ownership of me...he was surprised and touched at my confession, and told me that he had been purposely holding back for fear of harming me emotionally.....but that is no longer a worry now....and i am getting my hard, heavy out and out beatings i crave so much.

 

[Chicklet]

anywho, this isn't something i often hear about others in the D/s lifestyle engaging in...is it really that rare? anyone have experience with this themselves?

Well I'm not an expert, but I have to say that if when I'd started my interest in BDSM I'd found book upon book about physical contact of the fists and feet to subs, I probably would have run away with my tail between my legs. Maybe we don't hear about it as much because as down as the "general public" seems to be on BDSM, they'd go even further down on punching and kicking of a sub.

Personally, I'm not in to face slapping due to the psychology of it. I was never abused as a child, as the media seems to like to paint submissive folk, but the face slap still shakes me. There's something erotic about a peice of leather or the palm of a hand on your ass inflicting pain, but something different goes on in my head when I'm slapped, and I imagine it would be the same if I were "abused" in any other way that could be connected to actual abuse.

Originally Posted By Richard49
If the consent is truly informed
then to each there own

Richard is quite right, in my opinion. Face it, we BDSM'ers are sort of a minority, and I know a LOT of people who laugh at the whole concept. If we start saying "well, my kind of S/m is okay, but yours is sick" then we're sort of screwing ourselves over, aren't we?

BDSM to the point of death? Well, my dear pure, I consider that Snuff, a different type of fetish altogether. Let's let the Snuff fetishers deal with that.

-Chicklet

 

[Pure]

Hi Chicklet

//BDSM to the point of death? Well, my dear pure, I consider that Snuff, a different type of fetish altogether. Let's let the Snuff fetishers deal with that. //

Unfortunately the lines are not so clear, and if you read this and other threads about the excitements of danger--which ultimately means danger to life and limb, you will see that 'death' outcomes are not simply imposed {=snuff}, but nonetheless, expectable. (Being the devil's advocate, for a moment: ) Maybe 'hard sm' is not unlike boxing, skiing, rock climbing, or race car driving. Extreme excitement; occasional extreme consequences.

That said, of course, the ass--seeing your a.v.-- offers ample non-extreme opportunities.

 

[entitled]

<hijack> i like Chicklet's ass... </hijack>

Pure does have a point about the lines between 'snuff' and the more hardcore aspects of BDSM being pretty blurry. Then again, that's why BDSM has safewords.

As to the kicking/punching thing: it's not something i'm personally interested in. Not at all. If anything, it will make me fight like a cornered animal, which can be very dangerous for anybody involved. Even if it's not me doing the fighting.

 

[ownedsubgal]

Re: Re: Punching, kicking, etc. in D/s...

Well I'm not an expert, but I have to say that if when I'd started my interest in BDSM I'd found book upon book about physical contact of the fists and feet to subs, I probably would have run away with my tail between my legs. Maybe we don't hear about it as much because as down as the "general public" seems to be on BDSM, they'd go even further down on punching and kicking of a sub.

Personally, I'm not in to face slapping due to the psychology of it. I was never abused as a child, as the media seems to like to paint submissive folk, but the face slap still shakes me. There's something erotic about a peice of leather or the palm of a hand on your ass inflicting pain, but something different goes on in my head when I'm slapped, and I imagine it would be the same if I were "abused" in any other way that could be connected to actual abuse.




-Chicklet

actually Chicklet, for me anyway, it is quite a different feeling, mentally, when one is punched and beaten in more "traditional" ways as opposed to a whipping or some other typical bdsm activity. when Master punches me, he is putting me in my place with nothing but his superior masculine strength and power...i mean, i know that even if i tried, i could not come close to punching him with a force that would even irritate him, much less hurt him...but with no effort at all he can send me flying across the room, or have me curled up on in a lil ball on the floor....it is a very humbling experience. makes me feel much lower, much "less"..very feminine..very submissive....if that makes sense. but being struck with a whip or paddle or flogger just does not cause such reactions with me.

 

[Bondagebunni]

I'd like to cast my vote for fight club too, though we never got to see it, I imagine the love scenes involved a lot of mutual abuse. Payback was awesome, but I'm not all about that Lucy Ling, or whatever. Byegones. No matter what, I just can't believe her as an ice bitch, she's got too much of a sense of humor.

never watched aly mcbeal?

(if it's lucy liu you meant)

edit: sorry for hijacking...but i did kinda bump up the thread!

 

[Lisa_1978]

I've fantasized about being punched a lot...but I don't think I would enjoy it in real life. Fantasy is pain free.

 

[ownedsubgal]

bumpity bump bump

 

[Johnny Mayberry]

Good bump...we played with punching last weekend...it was a tease more than anything else.










For now.

 

[catalina_francisco]

Personally, and IMHO, if a D is so strong and masculine he would not need to punch and kick to subdue a sub as he could do it as easily, and with less risk, by capturing both wrists in his hands and forcing whatever issue, of course always withint the SSC realms. I think partly my professional background with DV makes my view less objective perhaps, but to me punching and kicking cross the boundaries of BDSM and SSC.

As stated, the injuries though less painful and obvious, can often be far more dangerous and life threatening which is not a turn on. Kicking and punching to the back can easily cripple permanently, at which point no doubt the D would make a quick exit in search of another victim. I have counselled many women who had the view they were 'just women' and their men were all so powerful and strong, but even so they never found being kicked and punched a turn on, and many suffered such horrific injuries, especially from kicking in the groin, they were hospitalised and had to forget any chance of having children.

IMHO it has nothing to do with love or BDSM, but is far more closely related to abuse. We all are aware of the risks we take in this lifestyle, but SSC promotes following safe guidelines to minimise damage, and does not endorse any severe physical activities directed at areas of the body which could cause permanent or serious damage. Each to their own, but I detect a lot more than eroticism and lifestyle concepts of D/s in some posts which disturb me from a professional viewpoint out of concern for those who will be potentially harmed and likely abandoned at that point.


Catalina

 

[ownedsubgal]

catalina, i sincerely hope that i am not among those you feel any concern for along these lines. of course, a physically powerful man does not "need" to punch or kick a woman in order to make his message clear. also, i would say that if the only reason such measures were taken were for the purpose of some sort of discipline or punishment, then imo that would not be the healthiest of situations. for my Master and i, it goes beyond punishment of any kind, and beyond eroticism....beatings serve many purposes in our relationship, things i won't get into here, and they are something we both very much need.

now...being from a rather "traditional" or "old fashioned" school of thought regarding romantic relationships, i strongly feel that my Master has every right to do whatever he wills to me, simply because i am his property. meaning, he doesn't "have" to be careful with me, to avoid hitting me in particular areas or with a particular force. but he is careful, and he does avoid particular areas, because he loves me a great deal and wishes me to be around to serve him and serve him well for the rest of his days. i'm fortunate to have a very wise, experienced and knowledgeable Master...He knows the sort of damage a punch or a kick can cause, so he avoids applying that kind of blunt force to my face, my breasts, my hands and feet. and he is careful everywhere else...not as careful as he used to be (to my immense delight, grinz)...but careful enough. there are no limits as to what he can do to my body..it's HIS body after all...but for now, he wishes to keep me healthy and in one piece.

a punch, a kick, does not have to = abuse or lack of love. there are so many prejudices against us all in this lifestyle, why must we have them amongst each other?

 

[rosco rathbone]

Personally, and IMHO, if a D is so strong and masculine he would not need to punch and kick to subdue a sub as he could do it as easily, and with less risk, by capturing both wrists in his hands and forcing whatever issue,

What about a "D" who is not "strong and masculine"?

What about an omega male who enjoys the exploration (in a controlled ess ess see fashion) of the ways and means of wifebeating?

A dangerous statement: there is something sexy about dee vee to a lot of people. Naturally, one must tread carefully.

 

[Etoile]

now...being from a rather "traditional" or "old fashioned" school of thought regarding romantic relationships, i strongly feel that my Master has every right to do whatever he wills to me, simply because i am his property.

I'm curious, what culture or time period are you thinking of when you refer to this as traditional and old-fashioned? I know there have been times throughout history and places around the world where what you describe was/is the norm, but what specifically are you thinking of with this? I'm just curious which culture or era you're making a reference to.

 

[catalina_francisco]

Although I always say to each their own, I have to also add that to each their own as long as it is safe, sane, and consensual.

There are many risks to punching, hitting with bare fist, like there are for example with caning. I find the idea of punching my partner not in the least erotic or exciting, although I did like the Fight Club a lot, I do not agree that it has anything to do with BDSM.

Let’s take a look at that movie and compare it to what is being said. In the Fight Club the main character is a schizophrenic type personality with a sleeping disorder who finds release in escaping in a fantasy world of violence. He creates a cult which he himself is so disgusted with that he creates a second personality to deal with it, a personality which in effect sets him free of his day to day responsibilities and gives him the strength to escape his dull life. A life he is dissatisfied with and this second imaginary character helps him overcome his own fears and makes him less restricted, however in the end he has to fight a battle with his own subconsciousness to not commit suicide since he has gone over the edge and has become too removed from what he wants to be. So although a very good movie with its good points and bad points, not a movie I would want to relate to in my BDSM reality.

Hitting with your bare fist is very dangerous and should only be done by professionals, and even those make mistakes and kill their opponents by accident. Although it is not a common thing in boxing, it does happen that there is a lethal accident and that is between two professionals who are under strict professional and medical guidance and in effect while they are fighting have at least an umpire checking what they are doing and stop the fight the moment it becomes too dangerous for any of the participants. There is also the danger not of death, but the lived reality of permanent and debilitating brain damage which may not be evident until well after the event, as in years in some cases. This is well documented and witnessed in public figures such as Mohammed Ali whose condition has been credited with being exacerbated by his years in the ring.

Taking that all into account I feel it is madness to incorporate bare fist fighting into your BDSM. However that is only my opinion.

Francisco

 

[s'lara]

Touchy subject

i am going to try and comment without belittling osg and her Masters way of conducting their relationship.

i am not a huge advocate of play that involves the possibilty of permanent damage whether that may be physical or mental.

i think the idea of being punched/kicked or punching/kicking during a scene makes us uneasy as it does not give the appearance of being a controlled environment. That kind of activity is so often associated with abuse, it makes us cringe when we see/hear about it in the BDSM world.

As it should.

The are quite a few predators that creep in and out of the lifestyle looking to exert a little abuse of their own. i am NOT describing osg's Master, so let me make that perfectly clear.

My point.

There are so many levels within each of us when it comes to pain play. The punching/kicking just happens to be osg's. Sure, it is a little outside what i am comfortable with, but i can't disregard it because it makes me uncomfortable.

osg - i am sorry, but i don't necessarily agree with all that you said regarding "the natural order" of things. Oh heck yes, men traditionally are stronger than women and when they exert that strength in a physical way, it makes me weak kneed. However, to my way of thinking, men aren't always stronger and not necessarily willing to show that kind of physical power.

i am 5'4" and weighed in at 114 this morning. It is likely that many men could overpower me. However, if i were 5'10 and weighed in at 140lbs and was in great physical shape, i am sure i could give a man a run for his money.

Your deification of men is kind of ... well i am not sure what it is to be honest. Yes, it borders on worship to my way of thinking, but not all men are made to be worshipped. i do understand about your submission and how it permeates all aspects of your existence ... that's all good and i don't see anything wrong with that as well. As long as it is satisfactory to you and your Master.

i think i will just hush up now and say be careful to monitor your physical condition after a session like this and i wish you the best.

lara