Quote of the Day

[Quoll]

Many years ago, Victor Borge created the game of inflationary language. Since prices keep going up, he reasoned, why shouldn't language go up too? In English, there are words that contain the sounds of numbers, such as "wonder" (one), "before" (four) and "decorate" (eight). If we inflate each sound by one number, we come up with a string of puns -- "twoder," "befive" and "decornine."


JACK AND THE TWODERFUL BEANS

Twice upon a time there lived a boy named Jack in the twoderful land of Califivenia. Two day Jack, a double-minded lad, decided three go fifth three seek his fivetune.

After making sure that Jack nine a sandwich and drank some Eight-Up, his mother elevenderly said, "Threedeloo, threedeloo. Try three be back by next Threesday." Then she cheered, "Three, five, seven, nine. Who do we apprecinine? Jack, Jack, yay!"

Jack set fifth and soon met a man wearing a four-piece suit and a threepee. Fifthrightly Jack asked the man, "I'm a Califivenian. Are you two three?"

"Cerelevenly," replied the man, offiving the high six. "Anytwo five elevennis?"

"Not threeday," answered Jack inelevently. "But can you help me three locnine my fivetune?"

"Sure," said the man. "Let me sell you these twoderful beans."

Jack's inthreeition told him that the man was a three-faced triple-crosser. Elevensely Jack shouted, "I'm not behind the nine ball. I'm a college gradunine, and I know what rights our fivefathers crenined in the Constithreetion. Now let's get down three baseven about these beans."

The man tripled over with laughter. "Now hold on a third," he responded. "There's no need three make such a three-do about these beans. If you twot, I'll give them three you."

Well, there's no need three elabornine on the rest of the tale. Jack oned in on the giant and two the battle for the golden eggs. His mother and he lived happily fivever after -- and so on, and so on, and so fifth.

 

[Tap-Out]

I fight because I know this world is a cold, cold place. I’ve been let down, stepped on, passed up, and fucked over. I fight because I know that in this world, the one person you can rely on is yourself: wives cheat, family abandons, and friends sell you out. When I’m in that cage, it’s me versus the world. True, I might get beaten, but I won’t be deceived. In the cage I find truth. It is only through truth that we can find ourselves.

 

[Jessieann]

Expecting the world to treat you fairly
because you are a good person is a little like
expecting the bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian."
— Dennis Wholey, 20th/21st-century self-help author and journalist

 

[Stefani]

Find a job that you love and you will never work another day in your life.
--Confucius

 

[Eilan]

Never mind.

 

[Little Bird]

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear - not absence of fear.

My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.

How little a thing can make us happy when we feel that we have earned it.



When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.

Several months ago I found out, this is true. I live a happy life in an ugly world sine then...

(All by Mark Twain)

 

[cymbline]

"The sexual organs not only have a huge role in our imagination of sex, they have given rise to religious ritual, meaning, and art. In fact religion demonstrates that the sex organs and the body's capacity for sexual expressiveness are not only meaningful, they convey the grandest and deepest truths about life."--Thomas Moore, The Soul Of Sex

 

[Thermister]

I've finally reached the point in my life at which the things I remember most clearly never happened at all.

--Mark Twain

 

[Heartless Bastard]

Steven Wright once said, "I woke up one morning and all of my stuff had
been stolen....and replaced by exact duplicates." His mind sees things
differently. Here are some of his.

A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.

All those who believe in psychokinesis, raise my hand.

I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.

Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now.

I intend to live forever -- so far, so good.

 

[Quoll]

A Tide of Emotions

by Ellen Bailey



We surf within the emotions of our lives
Riding them like waves on an incoming tide
Our feelings run high as we look to the shore
Cresting some emotion above the ocean's floor

Constantly churning while ebbing and flowing
We do our best to keep them from showing
Appearing outwardly to be calm and serene
But inside our self there is a turbulent scene

We seek the calmness and stillness of a pond
And find that our emotions will not respond
We seek to quell the raging waves inside
Hoping and praying they will quickly subside

 

[Heartless Bastard]

When you plant lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don't blame the lettuce. You look for reasons it is not doing well. It may need fertilizer, or more water, or less sun. You never blame the lettuce. Yet if we have problems with our friends or family, we blame the other person. But if we know how to take care of them, they will grow well, like the lettuce. Blaming has no positive effect at all, nor does trying to persuade using reason and arguments. That is my experience. No blame, no reasoning, no argument, just understanding. -- Thich Nhat Hahn

 

[Quoll]

Shamelessly lurking.

I was not sure where to put this, actually I am still not sure, so I will double post it.

Kikmosa

"Sometimes the spirit of a person is stronger then the body and can take and do things that the body alone cannot. Yours is a very strong spirit."

"Sometimes it's hard to accept what others say of us because we don't see it ourselves. But we also tend to see our faults and weaknesses first and can rarely get past that sight. Others often see our strengths first and rarely our faults and weaknesses. It's human nature."

Truly beautiful and inspirational.

 

[cymbline]

"For there is nothing either good or bad, thinking makes it so."
- William Shakespeare (1564-1616), Hamlet, II.ii

"The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense."
- Tom Clancy (1947-), paraphrasing Mark Twain

"I'm not the person your mother warned you about... her imagination isn't that good."
- Amy Gorin

 

[Quoll]

"For there is nothing either good or bad, thinking makes it so."
- William Shakespeare (1564-1616), Hamlet, II.ii

"The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense."
- Tom Clancy (1947-), paraphrasing Mark Twain

"I'm not the person your mother warned you about... her imagination isn't that good."
- Amy Gorin

 

[Ricwilly]

"There is a principle which is a bar against all information, which is proof against all arguments and which cannot fail to keep a man in everlasting ignorance - that principle is contempt prior to investigation"
Herbert Spencer quotes (British social philosopher, 1820-1903)

 

[cymbline]

"... you never, for instance, hear people say, 'Is that a wad of undiscarded
belly button fluff, or are you just glad to see me?'..."
-- The Usenet Oracle

 

[cymbline]

"... I was walking home one night and a guy hammering on a roof called me a
paranoid little weirdo... in morse code..."
-- Unknown, via Bruce Alcorn

 

[cymbline]

I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was a butterfly, or whether I am now a butterfly dreaming I am a man.
Chang-Tzu

(369-286) Philosopher China

 

[Quoll]

You know, it amazes me
that you`ve heard it all,
but you still don`t mind
hearing it again.
That you`ll let me talk
and talk and talk
till I find my way through
to a new perspective.
It`s pretty cool
how you always seem to know
when I need a hug
and when I need a kick in the butt...
and you`re not afraid
to give me either one.
Few people in my life are able
to see my good side
and tolerate my quirks
the way you do...
So, my friend
who`s heard it all,
hear this...
I love and appreciate you.
I`m glad
you`re authentic with me.
And I hope
you wont mind
hearing all that again
and again and again...

Jeannie Hund​

 

[da_machine_girl]

Forgiveness is giving up the hope that the past could have been any different. - Oprah Winfrey

 

[Heartless Bastard]

In order to be irreplaceable..... one must always be different.
--Coco Chanel

 

[Quoll]

When there is pain, there are no words. All pain is the same.

 

[Quoll]

From a litizen on the spiral of life.

"I believe that the spiral travels inward and outward. Continually in motion. I can turn it to the right or left and depending on which way I turn, is how it will spin. I control the movement. Just like the decisions I make in my life affect the spiral. Some good ones and some not so good. Either inward or outward. But always making them and learning from them. And not letting them get out of control."

 

[Xtacy]

We're all ugly in our own special way.
Change what you can about yourself, and appreciate what you can't.

 

[glynndah]

"We're on a blind date with destiny and she just ordered the lobster" (Mangled a bit):The Shoveler (William Macy's character in a movie whose title escapes me right now. Men of Mystery, perhaps.