Simple Sexy Skills for the Erotica Writer

[ShyMystica]

You would choose something I'm incredibly bad at for the exercise just as I was starting to gain som confidence wouldn't you?

much put upon sigh

I should have something soon enough.

Oh Rider, now I feel bad! I just simply thought that everyone was doing so well with the first exercise it was time to take it up a level. You shouldn't lose confidence on something like this as you did so well in the first exercises!

And take your time and enjoy it, that it what this forum is about.

My you are surprising at times aren't you . . . . this needs a little more thought though to get right, so . . patience heheheh

Well I hope that is a good surprise Rimmer! *giggles to herself* And of course, this one was meant to be a little more brain stimulating than the first one.

Oooo love this exercise. I will definitely give this some thought.

*giggles and claps her hands* YAY! Someone seems to like it!


I have changed the exercise slightly to connect it more to the first exercise. Not a big change, but enough to warrant a second look over what is being asked. Plus I put it in numbered form which always makes things easier

Let me know how you guys find this exercise.

 

[slowrimmer]

Idea/theme
Pure lust. Shes trying to shock, surprise. But also, this makes her feel powerful, and very very slutty.

Dave.
A builder, single. Just home from work. Stripping off in the hall and running the shower. Hes confident, but private. His space is his own. Doesn't like or get easily surprised. Comes into the room heading for the kitchen to get a drink, just needing to unwind.

The Exercise
It took Dave a second to register what he was looking at, and he stood, hands on hips, mixed emotions flowing over him. The hairs on his neck bristled in annoyance. Firstly she was still here, he’d told her to let herself out and he’d call her, although he was unsure if he’d bother. He just hated his space being invaded, unless it was on his terms. But, god. This was more than sex. This was a mind fuck, and, as his gaze played over her puffy and very red sex, he had to admit, he was hooked.

.

Spank me teacher . . . hehehe. Its a little more wordy than instructed.

 

[Last_Rider]

My confidence is a funny think Mystica, it takes time to build, then as soon as it's tested it shatters. I suppose it goes along with my total lack of self confidence IRL.

That being said, let's have a go.

Image 3 (I can't figure out how to move the pic itself, stupid lack of tech savy on my part)

Theme: Exhibitionism, thrill

Characterization: Rachel is a bit of a late blooming wild child, during her first years of college she discovered that she really just liked having fun, now on her first real spring break she's cutting loose.

Paragraph.

Spring break in Mexico was certainly something else! Rachel had been more than a little shocked by the rampant nudity on the beaches, but soon her reservations were gone, along with her bikini. The atmosphere was contagious, and in no time at all she found herself with some hunk in water up to her waist. Out of the corner of her eye she noticed they'd attracted something of an audience, and she smiled at the thrill that pulsed through her body straight to her clit. Let them watch.

 

[Miss Sixxy]

1. Mood/idea/theme: cherished, tender, poignant

2. Male: He is her illicit lover. He does not live close and they haven't seen each other in almost a year. He had been anxiously awaiting her arrival, but this is the morning he has to leave. He loves her, but they both know now is not the time for them to be together. He is quiet and reserved in public, but when he is with her he can relax, clear his mind and be completely himself. He spoils her and wants to be her everything.

3. Exercise: He held her, his mind focused on one thought, not wanting to let her go. Closing his eyes in an attempt to stop time, he breathed in her smell, desperate to remember everything about this moment. He replayed the events of their weekend and knew without a doubt they were meant to be together - 'just not right now' his subconscious screamed out to him as the clock ticked closer and closer to his departure. Pulling her even tighter, he kissed the top of her head and whispered that he loved her.

 

[ShyMystica]

I haven't forgotten about you all. I am currently out of town and don't have a lot of time to go through your posts. From the quick glance I am gobsmacked at how great you all are!

I shall return in the next day or two to look them over more thoroughly. Please don't stop on my account! Keep the posts coming.

Shy

 

[Vail_Indigo]

1. Power
Freedom
Adoration

2. The girl in the background: She'd made all the right choices in life. The schools, jobs, boyfriends. But she never knew happiness until the night a woman walked into her life, and handed her the end of a rope.

3.Mari loved watching the girl at the end of the rope. Loved watching her squirm and writhe. Loved watching how surrendering to Mari allowed the girl to surrender to her own desires, her own needs. Her own flesh.

 

[EzraPound]

dark,angry,seduction

well off,wary..hurt by those only seeking his wealth, lonely ,built a wall around him self emotionally.

There she was again, looking beautiful and smug at the same time. He either wanted to slap or kiss her and right now he wanted to do both . How did she get in this time? Trying desperately to be more pissed than he was, hating himself already ,knowing he would give into her... again.

 

[ShyMystica]

Idea/theme
Pure lust. Shes trying to shock, surprise. But also, this makes her feel powerful, and very very slutty.

Dave.
A builder, single. Just home from work. Stripping off in the hall and running the shower. Hes confident, but private. His space is his own. Doesn't like or get easily surprised. Comes into the room heading for the kitchen to get a drink, just needing to unwind.

The Exercise
It took Dave a second to register what he was looking at, and he stood, hands on hips, mixed emotions flowing over him. The hairs on his neck bristled in annoyance. Firstly she was still here, he’d told her to let herself out and he’d call her, although he was unsure if he’d bother. He just hated his space being invaded, unless it was on his terms. But, god. This was more than sex. This was a mind fuck, and, as his gaze played over her puffy and very red sex, he had to admit, he was hooked.

.

Spank me teacher . . . hehehe. Its a little more wordy than instructed.

Firstly I loved the angle you used with the builder.

I loved your paragraph, and for me, it poured with the feelings of annoyance and anger, both directed at her and himself for giving in to her so easily. I can't really fault anything, a few small changes in word choices, but over all it was lovely.

But for me, in honesty, I have read much better paragraphs by you. Your delicious leather bound hero who saved me from a previous thread still captivates me! *blushes*

Thanks for sharing Rimmer *huggles*

 

[ShyMystica]

My confidence is a funny think Mystica, it takes time to build, then as soon as it's tested it shatters. I suppose it goes along with my total lack of self confidence IRL.

That being said, let's have a go.

Image 3 (I can't figure out how to move the pic itself, stupid lack of tech savy on my part)

Theme: Exhibitionism, thrill

Characterization: Rachel is a bit of a late blooming wild child, during her first years of college she discovered that she really just liked having fun, now on her first real spring break she's cutting loose.

Paragraph.

Spring break in Mexico was certainly something else! Rachel had been more than a little shocked by the rampant nudity on the beaches, but soon her reservations were gone, along with her bikini. The atmosphere was contagious, and in no time at all she found herself with some hunk in water up to her waist. Out of the corner of her eye she noticed they'd attracted something of an audience, and she smiled at the thrill that pulsed through her body straight to her clit. Let them watch.

*holds Rider's hand in hopes to give him some comfort while she reads*

Rider, I'm speechless. And not the bad way. I am boggled to understand where your bad self esteem for your writing comes from. Your paragraph was perfect! It connected wonderfully with your characterisation. I was a bit shocked that you took the PoV of the woman.

My favourite part was definitely

"...but soon her reservations were gone, along with her bikini."​

Very clever and well written!

*gently kisses the backs of Rider's hands* Don't ever think low of your writing here, ok? You are brilliant and talented and deserve all the praise people give you. Don't shy away sweetie, please continue. For if this forum can give you some confidence, that is my blessing to the world of Lit. *huggles*

 

[ShyMystica]

1. Mood/idea/theme: cherished, tender, poignant

2. Male: He is her illicit lover. He does not live close and they haven't seen each other in almost a year. He had been anxiously awaiting her arrival, but this is the morning he has to leave. He loves her, but they both know now is not the time for them to be together. He is quiet and reserved in public, but when he is with her he can relax, clear his mind and be completely himself. He spoils her and wants to be her everything.

3. Exercise: He held her, his mind focused on one thought, not wanting to let her go. Closing his eyes in an attempt to stop time, he breathed in her smell, desperate to remember everything about this moment. He replayed the events of their weekend and knew without a doubt they were meant to be together - 'just not right now' his subconscious screamed out to him as the clock ticked closer and closer to his departure. Pulling her even tighter, he kissed the top of her head and whispered that he loved her.

Thank you Miss Sixxy for sharing. I wasn't sure if you wanted me to critique, but I shall leave this for you to ponder...

Right now my eyes are watering as a sudden sadness washes over me. You picked my favourite picture of the list, and you wrote it so beautifully. And it connected wonderfully with the characterisation you created. His desperation and sadness definitely radiates from your paragraph. Thank you again for sharing.

 

[ShyMystica]

1. Power
Freedom
Adoration

2. The girl in the background: She'd made all the right choices in life. The schools, jobs, boyfriends. But she never knew happiness until the night a woman walked into her life, and handed her the end of a rope.

3.Mari loved watching the girl at the end of the rope. Loved watching her squirm and writhe. Loved watching how surrendering to Mari allowed the girl to surrender to her own desires, her own needs. Her own flesh.

Ah, Vail...you made it! *pounces and hugs her tightly* I am so proud of you!

I picked that picture just for you, actually. *grins*

Your choice of words definitely connects with your characterisation; particularly loved, squirm, writhe, surrender, needs, desires...all very good choices in words. Perfect!

I also love the short, punchy sentences. But I wonder, are they too short?My only little suggestion would be to add a little more description as to how this girl is affecting her; what are Mari's feelings, thoughts, cravings, physical reactions to her?

Aside from that, you shouldn't doubt your abilities Vail. I am so proud of you for posting, you have made my day! Thank you, thank you, thank you! *hugs Vail again*

 

[ShyMystica]

dark,angry,seduction

well off,wary..hurt by those only seeking his wealth, lonely ,built a wall around him self emotionally.

There she was again, looking beautiful and smug at the same time. He either wanted to slap or kiss her and right now he wanted to do both . How did she get in this time? Trying desperately to be more pissed than he was, hating himself already ,knowing he would give into her... again.

Interesting approach Ezra. Thank you for sharing! *smiles warmly*

I certainly felt his inner struggle with her, and I was a little saddened for him. Your use of words and the dichotomy he is feeling is certainly showed through them. I especially loved the last sentence. Sent little chills down my spine! *blushes*

There she was again, looking beautiful and smug at the same time. He yearned to slap or kiss her, but right now he wanted to do both . How did she get in this time? Trying desperately to be more pissed than he was, inwardly hating himself already, he knew he would give into her... again.​

I made a few little changes, if that was alright, to push your powerful paragraph a little further. I dunno, but I always thought that the word 'yearned' was far more powerful than 'wanted'. *shrugs shyly* That was all that was. I added 'but' to highlight the stark contrast between his desires to kiss her and slap her.

Have I destroyed your intent of the paragraph? I hope not because it was great to begin with! You know how much I love your work from our SRP story. So thank you for sharing this with us. *blushes and hugs you gently*

 

[ShyMystica]

Change of images to continue exercise 2.

I am so happy with the responses I have gotten so far. I am sorry I couldn't get to this earlier, I feel like I have let you all down. Hopefully I will have a new exercise up next week, but I wanted to let this one continue for a little while longer.

Keep writing and keep posting!

Image 6

Image 7

Image 8

Image 9

Image 10

 

[Last_Rider]

Thanks for the vote of confidence Shy, my self esteem issues are lengthy and reach back most of my life. I'm working on them, and with the help of those around me I'm making progress. Slow, painful progress, but progress never the less.

I figured writing from the woman's pov in that pic was called for, though I'm no expert on writing from that perspective. As for the next one closes eyes and spins the yarn through his mind

Image 8 (as if there was a doubt)

Theme: Trusting, expanding limits

Characterization: Jeffrey is relatively new to the life style, untested in many ways, but totally devoted.

Exercise:

His eyes darted around the parking garage, She couldn't be serious?! When his frantic gaze found hers again, he realized just how serious she was. No teasing glint lurked beneath her hazel eyes, no smile kissed her lips, only determination and confidence. With trembling fingers and panicky darting eyes, Jeff undid the buttons of his shirt, shivering slightly in the cooler air, then his pants followed and he was naked. The kneeling was the easy part, even as his body quivered in fear and shame. Then she spoke and it washed away.

"I am pleased."

 

[Miss Sixxy]

Thank you Miss Sixxy for sharing. I wasn't sure if you wanted me to critique, but I shall leave this for you to ponder...

Right now my eyes are watering as a sudden sadness washes over me. You picked my favourite picture of the list, and you wrote it so beautifully. And it connected wonderfully with the characterisation you created. His desperation and sadness definitely radiates from your paragraph. Thank you again for sharing.

Thank you, Shy and you are more than welcome to critique any of my contributions to your thread. I don't mind at all.

 

[ShyMystica]

Thanks for the vote of confidence Shy, my self esteem issues are lengthy and reach back most of my life. I'm working on them, and with the help of those around me I'm making progress. Slow, painful progress, but progress never the less.

Trust me, I know oh too well the struggles of a deadly self esteem. Why do you think I do not post too often? *smiles shyly and blushes deeply* So if you ever wish to talk, just let me know

Image 8 (as if there was a doubt)

Theme: Trusting, expanding limits

Characterization: Jeffrey is relatively new to the life style, untested in many ways, but totally devoted.

Exercise:

His eyes darted around the parking garage, She couldn't be serious?! When his frantic gaze found hers again, he realized just how serious she was. No teasing glint lurked beneath her hazel eyes, no smile kissed her lips, only determination and confidence. With trembling fingers and panicky darting eyes, Jeff undid the buttons of his shirt, shivering slightly in the cooler air, then his pants followed and he was naked. The kneeling was the easy part, even as his body quivered in fear and shame. Then she spoke and it washed away.

"I am pleased."

You can definitely tell that this is a subject you are comfortable with. But also that this man is a person you identify with. How can I tell this? Because your paragraph is perfect! I can't and wouldn't dare change a thing. Its moving, powerful and oozes with sensuality. The powerful emotions that he is feeling (fear, shame, uncertainty, then the gratification of her praise) really connect with me, so that is credit to your abilities Rider.

Thank you so much for sharing. Any person who is lucky enough to write with you is truly blessed. *hugs*

 

[Last_Rider]

blush deeply

Thank you Shy. Since you didn't get to really critique that one, I'll try again.

Image 7

Theme: Lust, playfulness

Characterization: Rachel is a shameless flirt and sexually aggressive.

Exercise:

They would come to her, they always did. It was more a question of sorting out who was worth her time. Finally Rachel's dark eyes met his across the dance floor. He definitely had potential. A few minutes later they were in a secluded corner of the club, lips and hands all over the place. Her teeth found his bottom lip and bit, drawing a light gasp from him and her hand covered his eyes, depriving his sight. The next move was his.

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

Do you mind?

The Exercise:

Theme~ sisterly devotion

Characterization~Clara: the eldest, protective, loving.

Paragraph~

Clara wanted to provide the haven her little sister needed and could think of no other way to manage it. All that she had, all that she could give was this, a hug and rest, a place that was warm and safe. The gift she gave her sister became a moment of peace, of caring, of being wrapped in warm arms. Eventually they drifted off to sleep, together, whole.

 

[ShyMystica]

1. Mood/idea/theme: cherished, tender, poignant

2. Male: He is her illicit lover. He does not live close and they haven't seen each other in almost a year. He had been anxiously awaiting her arrival, but this is the morning he has to leave. He loves her, but they both know now is not the time for them to be together. He is quiet and reserved in public, but when he is with her he can relax, clear his mind and be completely himself. He spoils her and wants to be her everything.

3. Exercise: He held her, his mind focused on one thought, not wanting to let her go. Closing his eyes in an attempt to stop time, he breathed in her smell, desperate to remember everything about this moment. He replayed the events of their weekend and knew without a doubt they were meant to be together - 'just not right now' his subconscious screamed out to him as the clock ticked closer and closer to his departure. Pulling her even tighter, he kissed the top of her head and whispered that he loved her.

I can't fault it...truly Miss Sixxy I can't. I've read this over and over, and the same powerful emotions just hit me. Perhaps I am too emotional to look at it critically? *blushes shyly* I feel so bad, I can't seem to give any criticism for you.

But in any light, this wasn't designed for just me to sit and critique as if marking homework...I wanted this to be an open discussion. So perhaps another writer can offer a point of view I cannot?

 

[Last_Rider]

well great, there go my fantasies of you as a school teacher Shy

 

[ShyMystica]

Image 7

Theme: Lust, playfulness

Characterization: Rachel is a shameless flirt and sexually aggressive.

Exercise:

They would come to her, they always did. It was more a question of sorting out who was worth her time. Finally Rachel's dark eyes met his across the dance floor. He definitely had potential. A few minutes later they were in a secluded corner of the club, lips and hands all over the place. Her teeth found his bottom lip and bit, drawing a light gasp from him and her hand covered his eyes, depriving his sight. The next move was his.

From the PoV of the woman again? *smiles warmly*

Love the first sentence...it really captures my interest instantly.

It is actually the latter half of the paragraph that I feel is a little rushed.

Moments later they were in a secluded corner of the club, lips and hands all over the place.​

And I am not a fan of 'all over the place'. I've read your work and I think you can come up with something far more descriptive than that *smiles warmly*

Her teeth found his bottom lip and bit, drawing a delicious light gasp from him, her hand quick to cover his eyes, depriving him of his sight.​

Yes, it was that sentence that to me didn't flow. I added 'delicious' to add a dimension of her feeling for the the actual act. 'quick to cover' just seemed to flow more smoothly, same with 'him of his'. I'm not sure...my brain is currently still asleep it seems.

But the last sentence...short, sweet and powerful. I absolutely love it! I also loved your choice in words and the tone you used connected perfectly with your character description. Lovely as always Rider. *hugs gently* Thank you for sharing again.

 

[ShyMystica]

well great, there go my fantasies of you as a school teacher Shy

What? Me with my hair all tied back, big black glasses, overly tight blouse that my breasts can't fit into, tight short skirt and killer heals? Oh, did I forget the cane? Yes...all good teachers should have a cane...

Is it that fantasy you speak of Rider? *smiles playfully and giggles*

 

[Last_Rider]

Hm, you're right. I did rush that a little bit, but I have rw excuses this time

Anyway, second attempt.

They would come to her, they always did. It was more a question of sorting out who was worth her time. Finally Rachel's dark eyes met his across the dance floor. He definitely had potential. Moments later they were in a secluded corner of the club, lips and hands exploring, teasing, and tantalizing each other. Her teeth found his bottom lip and bit, drawing a delicious light gasp from him and her hand quickly covered his eyes, depriving him of sight. The next move was his.

 

[ShyMystica]

The Exercise:

Theme~ sisterly devotion

Characterization~Clara: the eldest, protective, loving.

Paragraph~

Clara wanted to provide the haven her little sister needed and could think of no other way to manage it. All that she had, all that she could give was this, a hug and rest, a place that was warm and safe. The gift she gave her sister became a moment of peace, of caring, of being wrapped in warm arms. Eventually they drifted off to sleep, together, whole.

Luna! Thank you for joining us here

I adore the theme and direction you took with the picture. Very sweet.

The paragraph it self is just beautiful. I love the tenderness and protectiveness it holds, and your choice of beautiful words definitely aid that.

The only criticism I can think of is that a sentence or two don't flow as nicely as they could. The choppiness takes away the beautiful aura you have established.

All that she had, all that she could give was simple; a hug and rest within a place that was warm and safe.​

I am not a fan of the word 'this'...not sure why, perhaps because it is too general and lacks meaning. I changed it to the word 'simple', does that work for you? I also added the word 'within' to take away the comma to try and make the sentence flow. I hope it worked. I'm sorry if I ruined it, as that wasn't my intention.

Aside from that, this paragraph definitely hits me hard as I am the older sister of the family, and I can associate with what you are creating. Plus the way you wrote it and your word choice reinforce that emotion strongly.

Absolutely beautiful Luna, thank you so much for sharing.

 

[ShyMystica]

Anyway, second attempt.

They would come to her, they always did. It was more a question of sorting out who was worth her time. Finally Rachel's dark eyes met his across the dance floor. He definitely had potential. Moments later they were in a secluded corner of the club, lips and hands exploring, teasing, and tantalizing each other. Her teeth found his bottom lip and bit, drawing a delicious light gasp from him and her hand quickly covered his eyes, depriving him of sight. The next move was his.

*claps her hands excitedly and hugs Rider gently* Perfect! So much better than the first attempt. I knew you could do better than 'all over each other' *grins*

The only thing I want to add is this;

Finally Rachel's dark eyes met his from across the dance floor.​

What do you think?

Aside from that...you should be very proud of this paragraph. Great work!